A gentleman should never press a lady for an answer—no matter what the question is.
A PROPER GENTLEMAN’S GUIDE TO WOOING THE PERFECT LADY
SIR VINCENT TYBALT VALENTINE
He had a plan to be alone with Loretta.
It wasn’t especially clever or inventive, but it had the best chance of working of all the ideas he’d come up with, including his outrageous thought of just waking her in the middle of the night and kidnapping her. He never knew he had such an imagination until he was trying to think of ways to find some time alone with Loretta. None of them were easy, because none of them were proper. According to Society’s rules, there were no acceptable ways for a gentleman to be alone with an innocent young lady.
So he had to invent some possibilities and settle on the one he thought had the best chance of being successful.
He was going to spend a short time in the drawing room, and then excuse himself for the evening. The plan was to go up to the empty room beside Loretta’s bedchamber and wait until he heard her maid leave. He would then go immediately and knock on her door. Hopefully, Loretta would assume it was her maid returning and open it without questioning who was on the other side.
When he’d returned to London after seeing Loretta for the first time, it hadn’t taken him long to decide he no longer had any desire for a woman or a lady who didn’t speak her own mind truthfully to him without fear. Hawk knew he preferred a lady who was constantly challenging him, not agreeing with him.
Like Loretta. The challenge she presented to him each time he saw her was irresistible, invigorating, and consistent.
Somehow, he’d made it through dinner without resorting to some of the awkward tricks of his youth. He hadn’t tried to rub his leg against hers under the table, nor had he placed his wine on the wrong side of his plate hoping to make an accidental brush of her hand as she reached for her glass. But now the evening had gone long and he was ready to be alone with her. He wanted to talk to her with no one else around. The way they had at Mammoth House. He wanted to touch her, feel her in his arms, and taste her lips beneath his.
Hawk had finished his brandy in short order and had hurried Quick along, too. They were now on their way to the drawing room to join the ladies. He was right in his assessment of Quick. The man was perfect for Adele. And she certainly seemed happy with him. Neither of them had stopped smiling or talking since they’d met. Adele had wanted Hawk to find her a husband, and he’d wanted her to avoid the Season and the possible risk of mischief against her. From the way the two of them had taken to each other, he didn’t think he could have found anyone better suited for Adele than Loretta’s brother.
Quick was a natural pleaser, and that’s what Adele was used to. It was what she expected, wanted, and loved. If she was waited on, listened to, and pacified, all was right with her world.
In the few minutes it’d taken them to drink their brandy, Hawk decided the man’s constant good nature and his penchant not to let more than thirty seconds pass without uttering a word would wear thin in a hurry. Quick had told him it was fine if the earl wanted to handle all the particulars should they go ahead with a contract of marriage. Though Hawk didn’t want to deal with Lord Switchingham, he might not have a choice. He had to remind himself that it was Adele who needed to be happy with Quick, not him.
Hawk walked into the drawing room, immediately noticing that Loretta wasn’t there. Had she gone up upstairs for just a few minutes or had she already retired for the night?
“There you two are,” Adele said, rising from the settee to greet them. “I was beginning to think you had decided not to join us tonight, and that would have been a dour ending to the evening.”
“It has hardly been fifteen minutes since you left the dining room,” Hawk countered.
“That’s a long time.”
“You have no patience, Adele,” Hawk mumbled more to himself than to her.
But she answered, “You’ve told me so countless times.”
“We wouldn’t have left you on your own for the rest of the evening, Lady Adele,” Quick offered. “It was all my fault we kept you waiting so long. I’m afraid I’m the one who had the duke talking so much.”
“Shame on you, Mr. Quick,” she said with a smile of delight on her face. “Didn’t you say you wanted to show me a clever move on the chessboard that would make a match go faster?”
“I’d planned to. If you still want me to.”
“Indeed, I do. I’ve had a board set up for us over here.” She pointed to the far corner.
“Adele,” Hawk said, when his sister turned away. “Where are Minerva and Miss Quick?
“I would assume Miss Quick needed a few moments to herself after dinner, as I did,” Minerva said, coming up behind him.
“Oh, yes,” Adele said. “I didn’t think to tell you she went up to the servants’ wing.”
To check on Farley, Hawk thought, with a mild tinge of aggravation.
“But,” Adele continued, “I suppose she could have decided to go to her room after that. I really don’t know, and she didn’t say. It shouldn’t have taken her this long. Perhaps she got lost.” She turned to Quick. “Our guests often do before they become familiar with the house.”
“Did she say why she was going to the servants’ wing?” Hawk asked, though he was certain he knew the answer.
“To return a boy who had gotten lost. She said he was part of her staff. He found us when we were looking at Miss Wiggins’s puppies. Miss Quick decided to go with him to make sure he made it back to his room without losing his way again.” Adele stopped and frowned. “Now that I think about it, I suppose I should have gone with them, but then I’ve seldom been to that section of the house, either. I might have never found my way back myself.”
“Neither of you should have gone. You should have pulled the bell cord and had one of the servants take him back,” Hawk said, his irritation growing increasingly difficult to control. Though Loretta was perfectly safe in the house, he didn’t like the thought of her wandering through corridor after corridor, trying to get back to the drawing room.
“Should I go look for her, Your Grace?” Minerva asked.
“No, no,” Quick said, striding over to Hawk. “I don’t want to bother either of you with this. She’s my sister; I’ll go find her.”
“I’ll handle this, Quick,” Hawk said in a tone that let the man know arguing would be futile. “It would be my luck you’d get lost, too, and then I’d have to find both of you. Minerva, you need to stay with Adele and Mr. Quick.”
Hawk grabbed a candle off a side table, dipped it into the flame of one of the lamps to light it, and then strode out of the drawing room without further comment. It was best to begin where Loretta had started, at the back of the house where the puppies were kept.
It didn’t surprise him that Farley had wandered off to have a look around the house. Hawk was fairly certain that roaming the streets of London was what Farley was used to doing every day. He also had doubts the lad was lost when he stumbled upon Loretta and Adele. More likely than not, he heard Miss Wiggins or the puppies barking and went to investigate. If Farley had been on his own as long as Hawk suspected, he’d probably learned how to go wherever he wanted with no trouble finding his way back.
The door where the dogs were kept was closed. Hawk opened it, and held the candle up to look inside. Miss Wiggins got to her feet, walked over to a crate, and peered over the top at him. She wagged her tail and licked her chops. “Go back to sleep,” he whispered. “I have nothing for you.” No doubt the dog was used to Adele bringing her a treat from the dinner table about this time every night.
After closing the door quietly, he started down the corridor. At the end of it, he had two choices. Either route would take him to the back stairway, which led up to the third-floor wing where the staff resided. If he turned left, a long corridor and one turn would take him to the stairs. If he went right, he’d have to make two opposite turns and then cut through the staff’s kitchen and dining area before making it to the stairs.
Hawk thought for a moment. He remembered how Farley had skillfully dodged him when he was running from him during the storm. Instinct told Hawk the boy was fairly good at taking turns, cutting through parks, squares, and corners. Hawk turned right and then took an immediate left. He’d gone about twenty-five steps when he saw a shape, and the swishing of a cream-colored skirt coming toward him.
His stomach clinched.
Loretta.
A tremor of arousal gripped him.
He stopped, leaned against the wall, and blew out a huffed laugh of relief. It wasn’t his strategy that had Loretta walking out of the darkness toward him, in a part of the house where they would likely be seen only by servants. It was fate smiling on him, and damned if he wouldn’t take it with a smile.
And use it to his advantage.
Halting in front of him, she casually folded her arms across her chest and with a measured smile, said, “Don’t tell me you just happened to be in this secluded section of the house.”
He stared at her for a long time, drinking in the contentment he felt at finally having her to himself. Candlelight made her eyes sparkle. Her complexion looked as pale as shaved ivory and softer than finest silk. She was the most enticing lady he’d ever met. He was certain no other lady had ever made his heart thump so hard in his chest, and he wanted her to know just how much he wanted her. He had a sudden feeling that she belonged to him and no other. Though he didn’t want to explore the implications of that thought right now.
“As a matter of fact, I was”—he paused—“looking for you. Adele thought, perhaps, you’d gotten lost when you went to take Farley back to his room.”
“I admit the return would have been easier if I’d had a candle to guide and help me, as you do. The corridors are long and not well lit; however, I made it after taking a wrong turn or two.”
He made an overt effort of looking behind her. “So Farley is safely back where he belongs?”
“Yes,” she said defensively, and hugged her arms tighter to her chest. “I had a few words with him about not leaving his room to explore his surroundings again, and then with Mrs. Huddleston for failing to keep a proper eye on him. I don’t think he’ll venture out on his own again. Please, don’t be too angry with him.”
“I’m not angry with him at all, Loretta. In fact, I thank him.”
Her blue eyes widened suspiciously. Her arms relaxed a little. “You do? Why?”
“Farley managed to accomplish for me what I was going to have a devil of a time doing.”
“What’s that?”
“Be alone with you. And since this is the servants’ route, we are not completely alone yet.” He took hold of Loretta’s wrist and said, “Come with me.”
He guided her along the corridor with him, then around a corner where he stopped, opened a door, and ushered her into a small, dark room where he closed them inside. Now they were alone.
He walked over to a square worktable and placed the candle on top of it. The light wasn’t harsh or glaring. It gave enough of a glow so they could make out each other’s features.
Hawk turned, fully intending to rush her, crush her to him, and have his way with her for as long as he wanted. He was aching to fill the deep unsatisfied longing for her that grew more intensely inside him every day. He was a man, after all, and he wanted her. Now. Fast. Hard.
Looking at her, knowing she was innocent and trusting, he couldn’t go where his mind and body wanted to take him. That was only a fantasy, and it couldn’t be played out anywhere but in his mind. Loretta had to come to him willingly. For her to do that, he had to take his time, make her comfortable, and slowly seduce her.
“What is this room?” she asked. “There’s an odd smell in here.”
His gaze followed hers. A tall wall of shelving stacked with fat jars, round tins, and bundles of dried leaves and roots covered the space behind the table.
“The medicinal room,” he said, walking back over to her, feeling calmer than when he’d entered. “Hawksthorn is large, with several hundred people in and around the estate. It helps to have herbs, spices, and various items available to readily make potions, tinctures, tonics, or whatever might be needed for fevers, broken bones, or cuts.”
“That explains the woodsy scent in the room.”
“Is it too overpowering for you?”
“No.” She breathed in deeply. “It’s pungent, but not unpleasant, and I detect a little mint and lavender, too.”
He smiled. “Good. I think the really vile-smelling plants are sealed in the tins and jars.”
“A blessing for anyone who has to be in here a long time, I’m sure.”
Hawk reached out and fingered the neckline of her dress. “The beading on your gown has been torn loose, and you have a scratch on your chest near the tear.” His heartbeat increased. His gaze searched hers. “That wasn’t there at dinner. Did something happen to you?”
“Yes.” She smiled. “But there is no cause for you to be alarmed. Your sister’s puppy decided she wanted to chew on the trim of my gown. When I tried to pull her away, she resisted and her nails accidently caught me.” Loretta reached up to her neckline, but her fingers tangled with his and she dropped her hand to her side.
“Ah—Adele and her puppies. She might be obsessed with them.”
“No one could blame her. They are warm, soft, and loving.”
Just like you, he thought and nodded. “Your necklace lies so beautifully on your skin. You’re lucky the puppy didn’t decide to chew on one of the diamonds in it rather than the glass bead on your dress.”
“I wouldn’t have liked that,” she said, shaking her head. “This was my mother’s favorite.”
“Then it’s precious to you.”
“It’s my favorite, too.”
“As it should be. And you wore it tonight for me, didn’t you?” he asked, not knowing if she’d admit it.
“Yes.”
His lower body tightened, reminding him it didn’t want to go this slow. “Does the scratch hurt?” he asked.
“There was a little burn at first. It’s fine now. I forgot it was there until you mentioned it.”
Silence fell between them while he contemplated doing what felt natural. “You know what I’m thinking?” he asked.
She shook her head.
“If there’s going to be any nibbling on you or your clothing,” he said, running his forefinger ever so lightly along her jawline, “it will be by me.” He dipped his head and lightly kissed the red line.
She gasped softly.
“And it will be gentle.” He kissed the same place a second time and smiled to himself. Her skin had pebbled with tiny goose bumps, just as he’d hoped.
“And wherever I touch you, it will leave no marks on you,” he murmured against her skin, letting his lips touch the scratch thrice.
Hawk heard her breaths change from even and slow to fast. Her chest softly heaved. It was gratifying to know he disturbed the rhythm of her heart and breathing as much as she disturbed his. He moved away from the scrape, but he wasn’t moving away from her. Taking his time, he kissed the soft pillow of her breasts that swelled gently along the neckline of her gown. Moving from one side to the other and back again, he couldn’t resist tasting her skin along the way.
She stood quietly, but not stiffly, and allowed him to gently caress her with his lips while tension and passion started a low rumble of anticipation in both of them. He didn’t want to frighten her. Now that he had her alone, he wanted to enjoy her, savor her for as long as possible.
Hawk lifted his head and looked down into her beautiful, trusting eyes as he slid his hands up to her arms, to that small area of exposed skin between her short sleeves and the top of her gloves. It soothed him to touch her. Somehow, it helped ease his eagerness, and yet stimulated his hunger for her at the same time.
“Your arms are cold,” he murmured softly.
“That’s surprising since I feel unusually warm.”
Her honest answer made him move closer to her. “So do I.”
Slowly, he placed his hands on each side of her face, bent his head, and briefly brushed his lips lightly across hers. His thumbs lightly caressed her earlobes, his fingers the back of her neck and the tops of her bare shoulders. He then kissed her eyelids, her nose, across first one cheek and then the other. There wasn’t a place on her beautiful face he wanted to miss touching or tasting.
“Oh, yes,” he whispered on a moan of pleasure. “So sweet. I needed to touch you. Kiss you.”
Not waiting any longer, he took her lips beneath his. The contact was warm, inviting, and instantly arousing. A rush of need bolted through him. Pleasure and impatience tightened his thighs and lower body. He kissed her softly, lingeringly. He took his time pressing, nibbling, and seeking the silent response she finally gave him when she lifted her arms then slid them inside his coat and around his waist, to pull him closer to the warmth of her body. Now he was certain. She’d been waiting for this, too. They had no soft bed, no sheets to tangle in, but those things weren’t needed. They had all they needed growing and bursting between them.
Hawk was going to make their coming together for the first time glorious for both of them.
Fighting with himself to keep his manner slow and unhurried, he plundered her mouth, her lips, her cheeks, and her neck over and over again, making her familiar with his touch. Wanting her to enjoy every sensation he created inside her.
With eager but tender movements, he eased his hands down to her breasts and caressed them reverently, loving the feel of them even though they were hidden from him beneath the fabrics of her clothing. She accepted his caresses and explored his back and shoulders, past his waist to his hips. Her hands roved over the contours of his body. Her gentle caresses soothed yet tortured him, making him want to beg for more of her touch. He wanted her to slip her hands past his waist to the center of his desire for her.
He lifted his lips from hers, looked into her eyes, and with a smile said, “Don’t be afraid to give your hands the freedom to go wherever they wish.”
“I don’t have much control left, and I’d best keep what I have,” she answered with a shy lowering of her lashes.
Hawk chuckled softly as his hands molded her breasts ever so softly. “I thought you were bolder than that, my beautiful Loretta.”
“I am brave but wary to go where I’ve not been before.”
“You are not one to back away from a challenge.”
“But I always like to know I would have a chance to win.”
He laughed again and caught her up in his arms and hugged her tightly to his chest. Their lips met again and again, open mouths with tongues darting, playing, and teasing and closed with gasps, moans, and swallowing long deep breaths of pleasure. He had no idea how long they kissed. It didn’t matter. He didn’t want it to end.
Yet all the endless kisses and touches made Hawk desperate for more of her. His body kept telling him to rush to end this aching, craving need that possessed him, but his heart and mind reminded him to take it slow and relish every sensation.
Carefully, he pushed her sleeves off her shoulders, down her gloved arms, and then worked her gown and chemise past the top of her corset, exposing her breasts, arousing him even more. He slowly moved his hand over one breast and then the other, taking his time to feel her firm softness before taking their full weight in his hands.
Loretta sucked in a deep, loud breath and he savored it. His body throbbed and ached. He kissed her all the harder, thrusting his tongue deeper into her mouth time and time again before moving to kiss her shoulders, her neck, and her chest until he could no longer deny himself. Hawk bent his head lower and pulled her nipple into his mouth. She sighed contentedly, letting him know she’d wanted this intimacy with him as much as he’d wanted it with her. His tongue circled her nipple, bathed it, and then gently drew it more fully into his mouth.
He groaned as if being tortured, for surely he was when she threw her head back and lifted her chest to him. She cupped his head to her bosom with her arms, surrendering to him. It was all glory for him—and for her, too, he knew when he felt her body tremble.
“Yes, yes,” she whispered on a soft moan of passion that thrilled him to his very soul.
“Does that please you?” he asked when he took the time to move to her other breast, wanting to moisten it, pull the taut bud into his mouth and feel it swell and harden as tight as the other.
“Immensely. More than I could have ever imagined.”
A flood of bundled new and exciting feelings that he’d never felt swept through him and burned as hot as oil on fire. Hawk skimmed his hand down her waist and then down the plane of her hip over to her stomach and to the firm roundness of her buttocks; he cupped them and lifted her against his hardness. With a gentle shove, he pinned her to the wall and pressed his lower body against her.
When she arched her hips toward him, Hawk threw his head back in pleasure. The tempo of her breathing turned choppy. His muscles contracted in the sweet pain of loving her so thoroughly. He gulped in a ragged breath. Her body teased him and offered no mercy for his desperate need to take her.
Over and over he pressed against her. With his desire for her at a fevered pitch he kissed her passionately, feeling like a thirsty man in need of fresh, cool water. He shuddered a moan of satisfying pleasure as her hips joined his gentle thrusts against her.
She moaned softly in pleasure, too, and trembled beneath his touch. Hawk smiled against her lips. Loretta wanted this union between them as much as he did. She was eager and receptive to his desire for her, and that aroused him all the more. He hadn’t planned they’d go this far this soon but knew from her response to him they both wanted this coming together of their bodies and souls.
With impatience to make her his, he gathered her long, flowing skirts and found her thigh. It was delicious as hell to touch her warm skin. His fingers and hands explored her soft flesh before he lifted her leg and rested it around his hip. His hands moved to the center of her womanhood, cupping the warmth of her there.
She gasped softly.
He groaned as his body pulsed rapidly. A spiraling heat of desire swirled and seared deep in his loins.
“I know I shouldn’t want to seduce you like this, Loretta. You deserve better but God help me, I want you right now. I don’t want to wait.”
Suddenly, after breathing out those few untimely words, he felt Loretta’s instant withdrawal. Her hands stilled. Her body relaxed. Her labored breathing slowed.
Damnation.
Of all the things he’d said, could have said, why was it those few words that penetrated her senses and stopped the flow of unbridled passion in her?
He wasn’t satisfied.
She wasn’t.
He still wanted her and knew she wanted him, too. He waited a moment to be sure, but there was no going back for her. And though it was the hardest thing he’d ever done, he respected her wish. He lowered her leg, dropped her skirts, turned her loose, and stepped back.
Her chest still heaved as she pulled her gown up to her shoulders and over her breasts. His body still burned stiff, hard, and tight.
She swallowed before saying, “Aren’t there enough women in London for you to pursue?”
If she’d hoped to give him a verbal slap, she’d accomplished it with great strength. The words stung, for surely he’d never felt for any other woman what he felt for Loretta right now. Yet Hawk shook it off and said, “Plenty.”
But none that he wanted.
“Then, perhaps, it’s that you’ve already been through all of them.”
“Most, I’d say.”
“So you will be all right with not adding me to that number tonight.”
“I’m sure I’ll survive,” he answered on a frustrated sigh.
Hawk ran his hand through his hair and silently swore the vilest word he knew before saying, “Now that we have the insults out of the way, Loretta, can we talk?”
“There’s really nothing I have to say.”
“Well, I do. I know you’re angry with me for wanting you, for helping you to want me, but you can’t deny the passion you were feeling in my arms. It was as real as what I was feeling for you. It is there, whether we are kissing, or just looking at each other, or if you are at Mammoth House and I’m in London. My desire for you never diminishes. And if you are truthful, I think you will admit that you feel the same about me.”
“It would be useless to deny it. I agree you saw and felt my yearning for you.”
He needed to know. “Then why stop us?”
“You must know why I can’t give in to the madness that I feel for you,” she pleaded.
“The vow?” He pushed the word past his teeth as if it were a foul taste in his mouth.
“I thought so the first time we kissed, and maybe the second time, too. I told you I considered chastity a part of my vow. I’m sure it was implied. Though if it was just my purity that troubled me, I believe I could live with that because I never said the words about chastity aloud in the church. I never even thought about purity or innocence when I vowed not to marry. But that’s not all that keeps me from—continuing.”
He didn’t like seeing her uncomfortable, struggling for the right words to say, but he had to know.
“What else could there be? You don’t mean—” He really didn’t know how to say it, either. Men didn’t talk about a woman being in the family way.
“Yes,” she finally said. “I’m not wise to a lot of the things that go on between a man and a woman, but I do know if we go further I could be left with child.”
He stepped closer to her again. “Loretta, I would never—”
“Abandon me?” she interrupted, and raised her hand to keep him from coming closer. “Since you wanted to know, let me talk first. Please.”
His throat was tight, full of what he wanted to say, but he gave in to her wishes and nodded.
“It’s more than just knowing that my uncle would disown me if I was in the family way. Though he’s been very harsh and unforgiving to me, I don’t want to disrespect his house again. I did that once, and it took me a long time to forgive myself for doing it, and even longer to forgive him for his reaction.”
“Banishing you. You forgave him for that?”
“Yes,” she said softly. “I did. Probably only because it made my life easier to bear and to accept.”
“But you—”
“Let me say it all while I can, Hawk,” she asked of him again. “And then I’ll hear you out.”
Uncertainty flickered in her eyes and he nodded again, though he could tell she struggled to gather and control her emotions as she put into words what she wanted to say.
“I know you’re going to insist that you would take care of me and the child, should there be one, and we would want for nothing. I believe that. You’re an honorable man.”
Her features softened, her body relaxed more, and all he could think was that he wanted to hold her. “I would love to have a child.”
He watched her eyes glow with expectancy and love at the thought.
“You see, I think I would be fine if that happened between us. But what wouldn’t be all right with me is that my child would grow up without a father who acknowledged him with his name. Bearing the shame of never being recognized in Society as anyone’s son, or daughter. I won’t do that to a child of mine.”
“There are things that can prevent a babe.”
“I know.”
Hawk’s eyebrows rose.
She blew out a little laugh. “There are many books in Mammoth House. Some that I’m sure my uncle doesn’t even know about, that have been left there over the years by heaven only knows who. I have read about what you speak of, but all precautions are still risky at best. I won’t be fooled by any of those devices or methods.”
He shook his head slightly. “I wasn’t trying to fool you.”
“Then accept that this is something I can’t do and, thankfully, I came to my senses before it was too late. I’m not as strong as you are, Hawk. The next time I might give in. I ask that you be a gentleman and don’t ask this of me again.”
“Then marry me,” he said quickly, not really knowing where the thought, the words had come from, but knowing that he meant them. He wanted to marry her. For the first time in his life he stood before a woman he didn’t want to lose.
After a long intake of breath that ended on a shaky sigh, she whispered, “What?” She stepped back, hitting the wall. “You can’t just say something like that to me.”
“I can. I know in my heart you belong to me and no one else, Loretta. Marry me.”
“I belong to no one. I can’t. And you know I can’t marry, either. I took a vow to never marry!”
“Break it.” He grabbed hold of her shoulders and demanded it hotly.
Her beautiful gaze searched his just long enough to give him hope, but suddenly she tore away from his grip and whispered earnestly, “No. I can’t. You’re being cruel even to suggest I do such a thing.”
“I’m being honest,” he said, his anger flaring because she wasn’t being reasonable. Did she think he took it lightly when he asked her to be his wife? “You were eighteen, and you were forced by your uncle to take that vow.”
“There’s truth to what you say, but I was also of a sound mind when I said it and I had a choice not to. I could have married Lord Denningcourt. So no matter what my heart tells me now, it doesn’t absolve me from the commitment of the words I said.”
“Vows are broken all the time,” he answered, not expecting this to be a battle he’d lose.
“But I took the oath in the church, standing in front of the vicar,” she exclaimed emphatically. “It was no less binding because of circumstances. And I never looked at them as just some words I flung into the air to try to appease my uncle. Please don’t ever ask me to break the vow again. I can’t.”
Loretta turned, opened the door, and rushed away.