At his baptism I gave his mother such a wondrous,
amazing gift
everyone gasped
Doña Beatriz is a saint, they said,
not even waiting until she’s
on her deathbed
to buy her way into heaven
Imagine
showing mercy so far ahead of time
what a grand act of compassion!
The musicians were playing their harps and flutes
the music of heaven
his other mother’s heart was drumming
and his rebel father’s eyes were roaring
genius, I announced, the brilliant child
of my old age
My proclamation was not trivial
so I lifted my arms in a sweeping gesture
my bosom grand,
my fingers waving to show everyone
the treasures I was free to give
my houses were filled with such choices,
such gifts, so easily granted
all I had to do was choose one,
a painting or a marble statue
gold and silver coins
lampstands and jewels from Persia
furniture inlaid with ebony and cedar
from this island’s dark, fragrant forests
I fingered the massive pendant at my neck
diamonds, rubies, and emeralds
all joined in a single design
Just one gift
that was all I had to choose for a baptism
One pearl or one coin would have been plenty
one slim gold chain
or carved toy
Instead, I made the announcement
the one I had been keeping secret
although I fear he must have guessed
because he didn’t look quite as pleased
as I had imagined
So I wept, I dabbed my eyes with a lace kerchief
I said the word, that one word
they all wait for, so patiently and foolishly
all their lives
Manumission!
I made it a big word
I waited, said it again
in its simpler forms
Freedom
Liberty
Libertad
all such fine words
so generous
My proclamation continued
in honor, I explained, of the baptism of this genius
the child of my old age
I give manumission to María del Pilar
for the price
of only three hundred pesos
And later, maybe Toribio as well
for only three hundred more pesos
and furthermore,
I hereby proclaim that from this day forward
I will abide by the Free Belly custom
of declaring all the future children
of María del Pilar and Toribio
free even long before birth, while still in the belly
hidden inside their mother
hidden, yet already free
even before she has earned and paid
her own three hundred pesos
the price of the court documents
she will someday carry
to keep the bounty hunters at bay
to keep them from seeing her and imagining
that she is a runaway headed for the mountains
ready to hide
ready to die
Ay, but my proclamation was so generous
that by the end everyone was weeping
even Juan, especially Juan
and strangely, also his mother and father
as if they imagined that three hundred pesos
could be considered
a fortune
Only Juanito, I said very clearly,
to make sure no one had misunderstood,
only this genius of my old age,
do I keep for myself
as my own
mine until the day of my death
when he will also
know mercy