MARÍA DEL PILAR

My son is not free, but I am, just as soon as …

    oh, but how does a prisoner like me

    find ways to earn and save such a fortune?

    How?

Imagine the shock, the excitement

    the anger, pure rage

Leave my son behind, how?

He is not hers, I won’t let her have him

    why does she insist

    that he is the child of her old age?

Life is not logical, nothing makes sense

    how can this be, one child a slave

    —my child, my only child—

    while the others, unborn,

    are already proclaimed free?

I’ll stay with you, Juanito, I promise

I’ll always live close, in some hut of mud

    or shack of palm leaves

    your father and I, and all the rest, those still unborn

    your brothers and sisters of the future

    we will not leave you behind

    you will see us, we promise

But you must promise this

    please vow that you will not listen

    when she calls you the child of her old age

    do not listen, do not believe her, and please

    never pray

    for her death

    even though it is the only thing you will wish for

    in secret

    just as I,

    without wanting to wish such a thing

    in the presence of God,

    already find my silent self

    imagining