Chapter Twenty

The drive after meeting Albert had been a quiet one. Jamie knew she had pushed Cookie to go with her, and judging from his silence, she couldn’t tell if he was upset or contemplative. She had hoped seeing Albert and speaking to him directly would ease some of his pain, but Jamie now wondered if her strategy had been a sound one. The silence drove her crazy, but she knew how to navigate these uncomfortable moments. After several failed attempts to engage Cookie in conversation, she relented and turned on the radio. She turned on a country-western station for the sole reason that she knew it bugged the hell out of him. Forget waterboarding—if you wanted Cookie to talk, try K-Country 96.7 FM.

He lasted less than five minutes. “Seriously, J, turn that crap off.”

“Are you done punishing me?”

“I’m not punishing you. I’m just… thinking.”

“About?”

“About Albert and Manny and why Manny should still be here.”

She couldn’t argue with him. “You’re right, you know. Manny should be here. Manny should be here, and Kristen should be alive. Lots of shoulds in our world.” She looked over at her friend, who seemed a bit smaller than usual, hunched in the passenger’s seat. “I’m sorry I made you go with me. I thought it was best.”

The façade cracked, and a sliver of a smile emerged on Cookie’s face. “You didn’t make me, and you were right. I needed to go. It’s just hard digging up these demons.”

“Let’s stop for Mexican food and eat our feelings. My treat.”

Jamie pulled into the parking lot of Taqueria San Juan on Grand Avenue. The meeting with Albert had picked at the wound that was Manny’s memory, and they needed time to process what they had learned before attempting to track down Marissa. Jumping from one fire directly into the next would certainly burn their investigation to the ground. They needed time to recover their balance, and that called for the best Tex-Mex on the island.

Once a local favorite, Taqueria San Juan had grown in popularity, and now the pair had to compete for seats with college students, snowbirds, and tourists. Jamie resented the hell out of it. She would have preferred for the place to stay off the tourist radar, but she understood the family who owned it needed all the tourists to make a living. So she stuffed her grudge in her pocket and elbowed a few hungover kids when she spotted a corner booth by a window. She signaled to Cookie to make way. The restaurant’s atmosphere was bustling. Multiple conversations were happening at once, and the background noise of waitresses handling plates and glasses further amped up the decibel level. Cookie plowed ahead of her, making sure that everyone made room for him to pass. People couldn’t ignore Cookie’s presence even if they wanted to. He could have helped Moses part the Red Sea and would have done it in half the time.

The waitress smiled at them but didn’t come to their table. She knew to bring two iced teas and two family specials—chicken enchiladas, tostadas, refried beans, and rice. A few moments later, their waitress placed two large Styrofoam cups of iced tea on the table, nodded, and left. Jamie reached for her cup and drank from the straw for several seconds. “Best tea in town. I don’t know what they put in this stuff. I might like this even more than beer.” She winked at him. “Don’t tell Marty.”

Jamie’s attempt at comic relief had fallen flat. Cookie obliged with a half-hearted smile, but it was clear that the meeting with Albert still weighed heavily on him. She signaled to his glass. “Drink your tea. You’ll feel better.”

Cookie took a drink and returned the cup to the table. “I want to be mad at Albert, but I know Manny’s death wasn’t his fault. Manny never listened to me, either. They were both trapped in that life, but I see Albert, and it reminds me that he made it out and Manny didn’t.”

Jamie leaned in closer to the table. “Perfectly normal to want to make someone responsible.”

“The Deltones are responsible.” Cookie sipped his tea. “I know I need to place blame where it belongs.”

“Do we really know that, though? Marissa said they weren’t responsible. Why would she lie?”

Cookie gave her an incredulous look. “Because she was tied up in a warehouse and wanted us to let her go?”

Jamie wasn’t sure responsibility for Manny’s death should be placed at the Deltones’ feet—at least, not completely. But she knew she had to tread this conversation with care. Cookie needed answers and needed someone to be held accountable for his little brother’s death. She wanted to give him that. “Look, we cut her loose from Boxer’s clutches. She knows she owes us a favor. And we’re going to collect.”

The twinkle in Cookie’s eyes returned. “Okay, Miss Badass, we’ll see how this goes.”

Their waitress soon returned with two family specials. Steam was coming off the refried beans, and there was far more rice than either could finish. “Here you go. The usual.” She turned to Cookie and winked at him. “You should try the chicken tortilla soup sometime. Best in Texas.”

“Just might do that next time,” he replied.

The waitress left to tend to her other tables, while Jamie and Cookie immediately picked up their forks. Jamie scooped up a healthy serving of enchilada, gooey cheese extending in a long string from her utensil to the plate. “I think that waitress likes you.”

He smiled. “It’s the power of the Hawaiian shirt.”

Eating overcame conversation, and their table was quiet for several minutes while they enjoyed their meal. Cookie was always the first to finish because his bites were like his stride, covering more territory than his partner’s.

Jamie had one particular concern about meeting Marissa, and while she hated bringing it up, she knew it had to be addressed. “If we actually catch Marissa at her grandmother’s place, it’s going to be difficult for you. Are you going to be able to keep your feelings in control? It’s a big ask, I know.”

Cookie reached for his tea and took a drink. “I can handle it.” He looked directly into Jamie’s eyes. “How about you? Are you ready for this? The anger, the rawness, it can catch you off guard. I know, speaking from experience…”

Jamie nodded, realizing she had been so worried about Cookie’s response to Marissa that she had failed to give her own enough consideration. “You’re right. I have no idea what it will feel like being face-to-face with her. This is the first case we’ve worked where we’re both so personally involved.”

“It sucks,” Cookie observed. “Let’s never do this again.”

Jamie finished her enchiladas, leaving little except a spattering of rice. She tossed the napkin on her plate to signal she was finished, and their waitress appeared almost on cue to exchange the empty platters for the check.

Cookie stood up from the booth, and Jamie followed, taking the bill to the register to pay for their meal. Cookie left a five on the table as a tip and waited for Jamie to finish squaring the bill. He opened the door and held it while she walked through then waited while a family with three small children came through into the restaurant.

“Nice manners,” Jamie said. “Your mama taught you well.” She pushed the unlock button on her key ring and pulled the driver’s side door open.

They both settled into their seats. Jamie tossed her bag in the back seat, while Cookie cranked the air conditioner on full blast. Warm air assaulted them, blowing Jamie’s stray strands from her ponytail in random directions.

“It’s going to be okay.” Jamie forced a small smile. “Whatever happens, we’re going to be okay.”

Cookie nodded and reached over to give her hand a quick squeeze. Jamie wasn’t sure the words she uttered were entirely true, and she was pretty sure he knew it. But whatever happened next, they would face it together.