Chapter 28

 

Taylor woke to an empty room, confused for a moment. In the distance he could hear music. A quick survey confirmed Phoebe was gone. With irritation, he dressed completely. He had wanted to be alert when she awoke so they could talk. Instead he had fallen into a deep sleep, and she hadn’t even bothered to wake him.

Leaving the room, he made his way to the parlor and tried the door. It was locked. Frustrated, he raised his hand to knock.

“Now is not the time,” Noah said from behind.

“Why?”

“She is working through, have you forgotten?”

Well, he would wait here until she found her answer. He settled himself in a chair in the hall. Noah leaned against the wall and raised a humorous eyebrow.

“Why are you standing around?” Taylor asked bitterly.

“In the event you need an interpretation.”

“Then by all means.” Taylor gestured to the other chair.

The music changed a few minutes later. “She is sad and depressed,” Noah offered without question, at the sound of Pachelbel.

Taylor moved to stand.

“Not yet. If you ever learn anything, learn this. When she is moving between types of music as this, never disturb her until there is silence.”

“Why?”

“Because an interruption disrupts her thoughts and she has to start all over.”

“You are serious?” Taylor asked, having only heard her play two different types of music before, never this emotional switch.

“Wait and see. She isn’t done. You can hear it.”

And listen he did. It wasn’t long before he heard Hayden, which he believed was sad or maybe angry. Taylor groaned and settled back, waiting, hoping this wasn’t where she would stop. The wavering music seemed to continue a bit longer than the others, and he was afraid that would be her mood when she emerged. Finally, she turned again. Bach, but she only stayed with him a short time before moving onto Mozart before she stopped playing completely. As she had covered the negative emotions, Taylor allowed himself to be hopeful and turned his eyes back to Noah.

“She is resigned and somewhat pleased with her decision” Noah stood. “She will be emerging soon.”

“But not totally pleased?” Taylor stood as well.

“If she were happy, she would have ended with Handel.”

As if on key, Phoebe opened the door. She smiled openly at her brother, then presented a more formal smile to her husband. “I am suddenly famished. You don’t suppose Cook kept anything back, do you?” She asked of no one in particular and walked right past them into the dining room.

“I believe she has decided to make you pay somehow.” Noah chuckled.

Taylor groaned. “So I gathered.”

Taylor followed after her and a maid informed them that if they would take a seat, dinner would be brought to them shortly. They waited in silence. Phoebe read the paper Noah had left on the table earlier and ignored Taylor completely. He might as well not be in the room. When the plate was set before her, she put the paper aside and gave her attention to her food.

Taylor couldn’t stand the silence. “I am glad you are feeling better. I had expected you to remain in bed for a few days.”

“I am a little sore from the ordeal, but not enough that I need to be lying in bed.” She shrugged and turned her attention back to her plate. This was more difficult than he imagined. They hadn’t even addressed what had occurred earlier in the day, ignoring the situation as if it hadn’t happened. But they needed to talk about it. He would force the issue if he had to.

“Why did you leave the house today? Or the day before? I thought you understood the danger.”

Phoebe raised bored, angry eyes to him. “I made an error in judgment. But he is gone. Dead. You no longer have to fear losing what is rightfully yours.” She dismissed him with a wave for her hand, the fork waved in the direction of the ceiling.

“Is that all you think I care about?” Taylor asked, irritation rising. If she would only get angry. If she would only yell at him.

“Taylor, I am sure you care for me and the child, but don’t pretend to feel any more than you do.” Pain flashed in her eyes briefly.

“You did start to believe the rumors.” Standing suddenly, he knocked the chair over, causing it to crash to the floor. He didn’t care.

“I don’t see why you are so upset. It is not as if this doesn’t occur in all marriages. I am fine with it. Truly, I am. You will have your heir and next Season we will return to London. I won’t ask you to stay by my side, and I will enjoy the freedom of being a married woman.”

So this was her answer. Was she making him pay or did she really believe this was to be their life from now on?

“Is that what you want?”

“That doesn’t really matter now, does it?” She stood and left the room.

Taylor spent the next hour contemplating her words. There was no way in hell he was going to allow her to continue on her own next Season, nor did he have any intention of taking a mistress. Somehow he had to bring her around to where they were, before the nightmare began. With no specific plan in mind, he mounted the steps, determined to follow his wife into slumber. Perhaps they would both be better able to deal with this in the morning.

Perhaps not. Her door was locked and he had no doubt she intended to keep him out.

Now he was irritated. No, he was angry. Finding a maid, he was shown to a guest room, where he spent a restless night.

 

* * *

 

Taylor’s frustration mounted when he discovered she had already left the house. They were at her home and he was at a disadvantage. Today they would return to his home, where she couldn’t escape so easily and where he had a key to every door.

The family was seated at the breakfast table when she breezed into the dining room. Filling her plate, she took a seat and totally ignored him. He watched her eat a large meal. At least she wasn’t neglecting her health. As she moved her plate aside, Taylor stood. “I would like a word with you, dear.” Irritation rang in his voice.

Phoebe sighed heavily and rose from her seat, allowing him to escort her into another room. Closing the door, Taylor turned to face her. “It is long past the time we should discuss what is bothering you.”

Phoebe feigned ignorance. “Nothing is bothering me any longer.” She attempted to walk past him.

Taylor grabbed her arm. “This distance isn’t exactly how I viewed our reunion.”

“Then I suppose you should have explained what you expected.” Rising on tiptoes, she kissed him on the lips. It was barely a kiss. “I am sorry I didn’t welcome you as a proper wife yesterday. It was a bit hectic. I’ll try not to be remiss again.” She smiled at him sweetly.

Taylor ground his teeth. “I would like to return to my estate today.” He had to get her to a place he felt in more control.

“Oh, don’t feel you need to stay here on my account. I am perfectly safe now. I don’t wish to leave quite yet. You understand.”

No, he didn’t. “No, I don’t.”

“I wish to be near my mother right now.” She patted her abdomen. She would use any weapon she had at her disposal.

“If that is your wish. I’ll send for a few of my things.”

“Taylor, it isn’t necessary. I promise to send word when the time comes. I know there are other matters you must see to.”

“Nothing is more important than you, Phoebe.”

“Really?” She raised questioning eyebrows. Then she turned, throwing her hands up in resignation. “Taylor, this isn’t necessary. I am resigned to how things are to be. I was young and foolish when I talked of having a marriage different from the others. I realize that now and you don’t have to try and protect my feelings.”

She was trying to protect herself. As much as she tried to hide it, the hurt he had caused still lingered in her eyes. Yet, she wouldn’t address the situation directly. He wanted to assure her that they could go back, that nothing had happened, but he knew she wouldn’t believe him. Not at the moment. No, he would have to find a weapon as equally useful as the one she had just used on him. He just had to wait. “I can see you have it all figured out. I will leave you then to think about how we are to proceed from here.”

Taylor left the house for a ride. One thing he knew for sure was that he wasn’t leaving. Even if he wasn’t in her room, he wouldn’t be far away. That was the only definitive decision he came to on his ride, still at a complete loss on how to bring her around.

His answer arrived early that evening. A knowing smile came to his lips as he watched Olivia step from her carriage. Now, to make her visit work to his advantage. Taylor left his room quickly and met her before she had taken a step toward the house. Pulling her into his arms, he hugged her. “Play along, dear. My marriage may very well depend on how you are received.”

Olivia only chuckled. In the month they had spent together, she had come to know him very well and trusted his judgment. “Patrick is in the carriage.”

Taylor started, surprised. He had arrived a month early. How wonderful for her. But now was not good timing. “Tell him to stay put.”

“I can hear you two and I won’t move,” a laughing voice came from the carriage.

With an arm around her waist, Taylor escorted Olivia into the household. He was hoping Phoebe was within, watching. They were talking with their heads closely together and Taylor was trying to quietly explain what had happened. Olivia was nodding when they walked into the parlor.

Hearing voices, Phoebe looked up and went visibly pale. It was one thing to read about her husband’s mistress and another thing to have to face her in person. His attention to the woman and her striking beauty left no doubt in Phoebe’s mind. Standing quickly she tried to hide her feelings.

“You left so suddenly and I was afraid something dreadful had happened so I came right away.”

“How considerate of you.”

Phoebe ground her teeth. They hadn’t even noticed she was in the room.

“Besides, I wanted to share my own little surprise with you.”

“I noticed. In the carriage. You must be thrilled.”

“Beyond thrilled, darling,” Olivia purred.

Phoebe cleared her throat and she no longer tried to hide her anger. How could he escort her here? Into her own home?

Their heads lifted at the same time, smiling, acknowledging her. “Phoebe, let me introduce Lady Bates.”

“I know who she is,” Phoebe acknowledged coldly. “Now if you will excuse me.”

“Don’t you think you are being rather rude, dear?” Taylor asked in a disciplining tone.

He brings that woman into her house and expects her to be hospitable? “Forgive me, where are my manners,” Phoebe replied with false sweetness, gesturing to the chairs. “Please have a seat. Make yourself comfortable. I’ll ring for some tea.”

“Would you mind letting your mother know I have arrived, please,” Lady Bates finally asked.

Slowly she turned, surprised at the gall of the woman. “I didn’t realize my mother was expecting you.”

“Well, I am a few days earlier than planned. I hope she doesn’t mind the inconvenience. I can use any old room, if you have one available.”

She was going to be staying here? In her house? Visiting with her mother? Had the world gone mad? “I will let her know you have arrived,” Phoebe said slowly.

“Surely your mother told you of her cousin’s visit,” Taylor finally said.

“Cousin?” Phoebe repeated, then turned to look at the woman.

Lady Bates approached Phoebe, smiling, looking her over. “You don’t remember me, do you, dear?”

Phoebe shook her head slowly in denial.

“I stopped by for a quick visit a few months ago, but you were resting..”

She vaguely remembered a visitor.

“I didn’t get a chance to see you then.”

“You visited here before you met my husband?” Phoebe was beginning to feel ill.

“That is why I sought him out in the first place. To offer my assistance.”

Phoebe shook her head in denial. No. Could she have been that wrong?

“Certainly you didn’t believe all those vicious rumors?” Lady Bates asked, laughing.

“Given what I have read and heard, I would believe the worst as well,” Taylor admitted.

Phoebe tried to put the pieces together. “You spent three nights together. Shared a room.”

“Is that what finally convinced you?” Taylor asked.

“I didn’t want to believe any of it. But a wife can be told only so much before she realizes denying the obvious truth is foolish.”

“So you had faith until that weekend?”

“Yes, mostly. It was very difficult with you two in constant companionship.” She pointed an accusing finger at Lady Bates.

“I told you I thought we were overdoing it,” the accused woman offered weakly.

“Do you know how humiliating it is to read daily about your husband and his lover? Where they were seen, what they were doing. What was missed in the newspaper was provided in letters.”

Taylor threw up his hands in defense. “I admit it. I appear incredibly guilty. ”

“It hurt, Taylor. It hurt very much. I don’t want to ever feel that foolish again. I won’t let it happen again.” Phoebe choked back tears.

“Foolish? Why?”

“Because I told you how much I loved you, how I didn’t want a marriage like the others. How I would hate for you to take a mistress and you threw it back in my face. I imagined how you must have laughed at me.”

He stepped forward, concern in his eyes. “I would never laugh. Don’t you have any idea what you mean to me?” His voice had dropped to an anguished whisper.

Olivia exited the room and closed the door behind her.

“Once I thought I knew,” Phoebe admitted, tears pooling in her eyes.

“It hasn’t changed. If anything, those months we were apart only made me realize how much I need you.”

“Oh, I don’t know what to believe any more.”

“I am so sorry. Had I any idea you had started doubting me, I would have dropped everything and come home.”

“Then Boris wouldn’t have been caught.”

“I would have risked it.”

She looked up at him, deeply into his eyes, searching for the truth.

“When I saw you yesterday, on that wall with Boris, I realized nothing mattered if I didn’t have you. I was so afraid for your life and that of our son. Then when you hung over the side, I prayed harder than I ever had in my life that I didn’t let go.” Taylor’s own pent up emotions were coming to the surface, and Phoebe knew the truth. Moisture thickened in his warm eyes. What a fool she had been. Not for loving him, but for doubting him.

“Oh, Taylor, I am so sorry. Can you ever forgive me?”

“I would forgive anything if you promise to never doubt me again. Phoebe, you are all that matters. I mean it when I say nothing means anything if I don’t have you. I have found love and I never want to be without it again.”

She clung to him, sobbing joyful tears, tears from all the emotions building over the past months. Tears of relief that it was all over and that she had him back.

“Can we go home now?”

Phoebe pulled away and looked down. How could she tell him she didn’t want to go home yet? She had already caused enough pain by doubting him.

“What is wrong?”

“It’s just that...Taylor I want to be with you more than anything.”

“But?”

“I do want to be near my mother.” Walking away from him, she tried to explain. “This is her first grandchild. I know it is silly, and I still have a few months. It is just that, well, I am scared and don’t understand everything that is happening. She has been through this before and she always makes me feel better...” She trailed off.

She became aware of him behind her as he pulled her close, sliding his hands around their child. “Phoebe, I understand perfectly. We have a few options.” Turning, she faced him and waited. “We could see if she would like to come with us, then she can be with you when the time comes, and available to answer your questions. Or,” he kissed her forehead, “we can travel home, only long enough for me to put a few things in order and pack some belongings for a long stay. I promise to return you within a month. Before Christmas. And our child can be born here.”

Tears of gratitude filled her eyes. “You would do that?”

He kissed her deeply. “Don’t you know by now I would do anything for you?”