Well, sir, I laid there like that for most a the rest a that day before I tried to move atall, and whenever I did final try to move, why, I can tell you, it hurt me like blue-blazing hell. I rolled my head over somewhat, and I kindly rolled over onto my belly so that I could get me up onto my hands and knees, but only my head throbbed and sharp pains went a-shooting through my ribcage. I ain’t never hurted like that there, not even whenever I got myself shot through.
Now the reason I was a-putting myself through so damn much agony is that I had to get myself up to go and answer the call a nature if you get my meaning plain enough. I sure didn’t want to just lay there and do it in my britches. If I was a-going to die right there, why, I didn’t want no one coming along later and finding my body in that embarrassing state, and if by some miracle a the Lord I was to live, why, there was even more reason to keep my pants clean. So that’s how come me to be a-suffering all that misery and wretchedness in order to get my ass up from there.
Well, I done it all right, and then I went right back to where I had come from, and I set my ass back down there beside a the crick. I knowed for sure that I never had the strength to start in walking back to the Devil’s Town. It hurt too damn bad to walk for one thing. And then too, I didn’t have no idee how long I had been a-laying there in misery ’cept only the sun were getting low in the western sky, so I
reckon it had done been most a the whole rest a the day.
My head weren’t yet quite clear, but I started in trying to think anyhow. I wanted to figger out what the hell I had oughta be a-doing about my miserable predicament. There I was all alone miles and miles from any kinda civilization on foot without no food nor no gun, and on top a all a that I was hurt some. My head was splitted and my ribs was caved in. I started into feeling hungry, too. All I could do was to just drink water outa that there crick, and I was thankful for that one blessing that I was there at a crick. I figgered I could live on water for a while, but sooner or later I was a going to have to have some vittles.
Trouble was I didn’t have no idee on how I might could take keer a my problems. I didn’t have no way a looking at my own head to see how bad it was splitted, and it was a-hurting me too much to reach up and touch it and feel around, and not only that, but if I was to a tried to reach up to it, why my ribs hurt real bad whenever I raised up my arm. And it was my right arm, too. ’Course, I didn’t have no gun nohow. And about them ribs, all I knowed that anyone, even a doctor, could do about busted-in ribs was to just wrap something real tight around them, and I didn’t have nothing to wrap them with, nor I couldn’t a did the job myself if I had a had something. The more I thunk the more I figgered I was just going to lay there and die.
Well, the lastest and furtherest kinda thought I had ever had was that I would die like that. It had come to me that I might could get my ass blowed away one a these days. You know, someone might slip up behind me and shoot me in the back, or I might get my ass involved again in one a them big general shootouts where it didn’t make no difference how good a man was, they was so many bullets a-flying you could ketch one total by accident. Or I might be off in them mountains with ole Zeb and fall offa the side and wind up down in China. Or maybe a whore might get mad at me and slice
me up with a hide-out knife or bang me hard over the head with a whiskey bottle. Or some lawman like ole Chastain might cut me in half with a shotgun blast. All a them kinda things had crossed my mind before at one time or another, but never just a-laying hurt beside a crick without no food nor horse nor gun.
Well, with the sun a-going down, I figgered I might just as well get me some sleep, and I was a-hoping that I might wake up the next morning feeling a whole lot better. It tuck some doing, but I found me a spot on the ground what weren’t too damned uncomfortable where I could lay myself out with the least amount a pain, and I settled in there for the night. I couldn’t sleep, though, on accounta all a them thoughts kept a-swirling around in my head. Them thoughts and others, like I was a thinking on ole Zeb and ole Red and ole Chastain. All a my friends. I even thunk on ole Churkee and wondered how he found the Churkee Nation and did he like it as good as Californy.
I thunk a lot about ole Dick Cherry too and how I had thunk that he was my pardner and then him to do me what he done. I thunk about finding him and killing him. I wanted to do it a-facing him. I wanted him to know it was me and to know how come he was a-fixing to die. I wanted to see the desperation in his eyeballs whenever he final reached for his shooter a-hoping for a miracle just before I blasted his ass away.
I was a-thinking all a them thoughts, but mostly of all my belly was complaining to me something awful. There wasn’t nothing nowhere around to eat, and I was powerful hungry. You ever try to get some sleep whenever your belly’s a-growling at you? I tell you what, it’s damn near a impossible thing to do. If I’d a been somewhere in a town and a-feeling that hungry and not be able to sleep thataway, why, I’d a got my ass up and gone to find some food and maybe
some company. But that there was a big if and it didn’t make no matter nohow.
Somehow, some time in the middle a the night by some mercy I drifted off. And I musta slept a good many hours too. I might not a ever waked up again but only I felt a sharp pain in my side, and then I felt something like as if they was something stepping on me, and I opened up my eyes, and the sun was already up a ways. It were daylight, and I squinted my eyeballs in that bright sunlight, and then I seed that damn buzzard a-walking on my belly. Well, I couldn’t help myself none. I screamed. And I slapped at him with both a my arms, and it hurt my ribs like hell, but I kept on a-slapping anyhow, and he hopped on me and spread out his wings and moved over a few feet away to look at me.
He figgered I was near dead, and he meant to be the first one there whenever I give up the ghost. Well, I tell you, his attitude pissed me off. “You nasty son of a bitch,” I yelled at him. “You ain’t eating my ass.” I picked up a fist sized rock and heaved it at him, but I missed, the pain in my side was a-messing with my aim. It didn’t hardly even skeer him none. He just only kindly side-stepped. I hunted up another rock, and this time I meant to get him no matter how bad it hurt.
I planned my throw real good, and I figgered on the pain and swore that I would endure it. Then I heaved, and damned if I didn’t splat that rock right into that nasty bird’s head. Buzzard blood flew, and he fell over and flapped around for a bit, and then he croaked right there with me a-watching. Well, I looked at him. He was kinda fat. But then I told myself that I didn’t really want to eat no buzzard. I weren’t yet that desperate. I told myself that over and over, but still I kept a-staring at him. I knowed I could pluck him. I had my penknife in my pocket, and it weren’t the best for the job, but I could gut him and cut him up.
Only the mainest thing was, I didn’t know if there was any way in hell I could get a fire started. I felt in my pocket for my makings and my matches, and I did have some. They hadn’t got wet neither whenever I dunked my head in that crick. That give some hope, and I started in to looking around for something to build a fire with. Well, it tuck me some time and a lot a pain, but I final had gethered up a small pile a sticks and brush and dried weeds and such, and I did manage to get a small fire a going.
It skeered me though that it would all burn up real fast before I was ready to put any a that nasty bird on to cook, so I went around some more a-gethering more fuel. When I final felt safe, I went over to that dead buzzard, and I went to plucking. I tell you what, if I’d a had anything in me to puke up, I’d a did it. It like to made me sick to death. It were a stinking, nasty thing. I damn near give it up a time or two, but I never. I kept on a-going, and when I final had it all plucked, it kindly looked like a turkey to me or a fat chicken, and I tried to make me believe that it really was one a them things and not what it actual were.
Well, I busted off its wings and legs and I broke its carcass in half, and I throwed them pieces a meat onto my little fire, and while it was a-starting to sizzle, I made my way back over to the edge a the crick and washed off some a the blood and black feathers from my hands. I had buzzard blood all over the front a my shirt, too, but there weren’t nothing I could do about that.
By and by, I et that bird’s leg. And you know what? It weren’t too bad. I et the other’n. Then I et the two wings, and then I weren’t suffering so much no more. I pulled the rest a the carcass outa the fire figgering that I’d likely get hungry again before the day was did, and I’d best save me something. Well, that damn bird what had frighted me so on accounta it thunk that I was a meal had turned out to be a life-saving meal for me. I set there feeling some triumphant.
My head weren’t hurting as bad as it had did before. My ribs was still paining me a-plenty, though.
I wondered what ole Red woulda said if I was to ever told her I’d kept me alive by eating a buzzard, and I decided that she didn’t never need to know. Maybe no one would ever know. Eating buzzard might be one a them things a feller had ought to keep secret, like shitting in his pants or something. Well, anyhow, my belly being full, I got to thinking some clearer, and it come to me that there just might be something to eat in that there crick. I went back over and went to studying on it.
First off, I tuck myself another drink to help to wash down that buzzard meat, and then I set back and stared at that crick water a-flowing by. I didn’t see no fishes right off, but I figgered they was in there all right. Only thing was I didn’t have no way a-ketching me no fish. I wondered then about crawdads. They was fit to eat, better’n buzzard, but it’d take a pile a the critters to make a meal, and they can move pretty fast. First thing I had to figger was they even any of them in there.
I looked up and down, and I seed some big flat rocks off to my right, so I moved on down there. I got down on my hands and knees, groaning some all the time, and then I reached out to get a holt on one a them flat rocks, and it did hurt some in the reaching. Then I went and flipped it over, and I damn near yelled whenever I done that, but I did see some crawdads a-scurrying off. I went to craving them.
Well, I had to figger me a way to ketch me some a them. I knowed I couldn’t never just reach out and grab me some. Even if I could glom onto one or two thataway, I couldn’t never ketch enough to make a meal. Now, I knowed that them little backwards-walking devils was meat eaters, and I got to thinking about that there buzzard meat what I had left over. But only what if I was to use the buzzard meat as bait and then not ketch me enough crawdads to be of any real
use? I’d a wasted the meat too. Then what? Well, I had to think on that for a spell.
I went back over close to my little fire and studied on what was left a my earlier meal, and I hated the thought a tossing any of it out into the crick for crawdad bait. Then it come to me that crawdads might crave guts as much as meat. I could use the guts what I had cleaned outa that buzzard for bait. But I didn’t have no string nor no net nor nothing. I knowed, or at least I was pretty sure, that if I was to toss in some a them buzzard guts them crawdads would crawl all over it. But then I would have to have some way a pulling it back outa the water, crawdads and all, and I couldn’t think what that could be. I knowed my buzzard meat weren’t gonna last me too much longer. One or two more meals was all.
It wouldn’t do me no good atall to throw away a meal a buzzard for a maybe meal a crawdads. But I did want them crawdads since I had actual saw them in there in that crick water. Then my brain went and spinned a dirty trick on me. I thunk about them slimy little critters a-crawling around in that there water, and it come to me that they done ever’thing in there. They et and they shat and they pissed. They went and made more crawdads on each other. Then there was the fishes. They done it all in there, too. And I was a-drinking that water. It come to me that if I didn’t die from some other thing, I might die a fish and crawdad shit poisoning. I went to craving a drink a water too.
Well, the craving got the best a them other thoughts, and I went and had me another drink a water, but I done it upstream a where I had saw them crawdads. One thing them ugly thoughts done for me was they made me more determined than ever to get them little bastards. Then it come to me. I knowed I couldn’t hurt my ole shirt no more than what it was already mint what with buzzard blood and all splattered all over it. I tuck it off, and the taking off of it sure
did hurt, ’special the pulling a my arms outa the sleeves. I got it off though, and I went and kindly spreaded it out in the water close to the edge a the crick right close to them flat rocks. Then I went and tuck up some a them buzzard guts, and I went back to the crick and throwed them right in the middle a my shirt. Then I set and waited.
By God, I was right. I sure felt clever. It weren’t long atall and them crawdads was a-crawling all over them buzzard guts. Then they was so many a the little devils, they was a-crawling all over theirselfs, and I couldn’t even see the bait no more. I left them alone for a spell like that, letting them get real good and involved in what they was a doing, and then I slipped out into the water a ways real easy-like, and I bent over, gritting teeth, and I tuck my shirt up by two different sides, and then I hauled it outa the water all at once a-bringing crawdads and all with it. I hurried on over to my fire, and I laid that shirt down there.
Then I went to popping heads offa crawdads as fast as ever I could. They was a-trying like hell to scurry back towards the crick, so I had to grab them up, stop them, and then pop off their heads. You know, if you do it just right, whenever you pop the head off a crawdads, you pulls out his gut at the same time, all in one stroke, and he’s cleaned and ready to cook. Well, by God, I got them all. Ever’ one. I had me a good pile a crawdads there. A meal’s worth. By then I was hungry again, too, so I just tossed them in the fire. I tell you what. They wasn’t bad eating.
I et up all a them crawdads, and later on in the day, I et the rest a that there buzzard, and then I knowed that I was in trouble again. I didn’t figger that no buzzard was going to come and perch on my belly again, and I was all outa crawdad bait. But at least I wouldn’t go to sleep hungry again. I rolled me a smoke and smoked it, and that were kindly relaxing under the troubling circumstances. It come to me that there I was without the barest necessaries but I
had me a luxury. I had me the makings. Long about when the sun started in getting low, I decided to sleep again. My nasty shirt had might near dried out again, and I spread it out so I wouldn’t be a-laying my nekkid skin on the pebbly ground. I went to sleep without near so much trouble as what I’d had the night before.
Come morning, I were well rested, but I was terrible hungry. I was thinking on ham and eggs and biscuit and gravy. And coffee. I sure was a-craving some hot coffee. I tuck keer a nature’s calls, and then I drunk me some crick water, and I thunk about them crawdads and fishes a-doing all that there nasty stuff in that water, but I drunk it anyhow. My head were feeling some more better, only throbbing now and then, and my sides was still a-aching pretty bad, but only I had done figgered out how to move around with the pain. I picked up my ole shirt and flipped it around trying to dust it off some, and nasty as it was, I put it back on. I didn’t want to get my back blistered in the sun on top a all my other ailments.
Well, I went to walking around and a-looking off towards Devil’s Place even though I knowed I could never walk that distance, but I was a-wondering what the hell I might could do about the situation I was in. I was a-asking myself questions, but I wasn’t coming up with no answers. I was all outa buzzard and crawdad and crawdad bait. I was back where all I had was water what fishes and crawdads had been nastying up on a regular basis, and I didn’t have no way a killing or ketching me any food. I even went to looking around to see if there might maybe be some kinda plant I could pull up and chaw on, but I never seed nothing a the kind. ’Course, I weren’t too smart about that kinda stuff. Zeb had showed me a few things, but I never seed none a them things there around that crick.
I thunk hard about starting out to walk toward Devil’s Ass. Just setting there at the crick seemed like as if I was
a-giving up, and that didn’t seem right. On the other hand, if I was to start in walking, I would get my ass out there somewhere without even water to drink. So it seemed to me like as if I was better off there at the crick. At least I had water. Maybe someone would come along before I was to die a starvation.
Then it come to me. What if Cherry and them Duttons was to come back? I would be total helpless. I didn’t have no gun. Even if I hadn’t a been hurt, I wouldn’t a been no use without a gun. I was skinny and scrawny, and I couldn’t a-fit nothing with just only my bare hands and my feet to kick with. Why, if they was to come back, they could kill me dead with their fists or with a rock or they could just shoot me dead. I wouldn’t be able to do nothing but just only stand there and wait for it.
But then, why would they come back? They had all that there payroll money, and they would have Wheeler and all the outlaws a Devil’s House after their ass. I figgered that had been a stupid thought I’d had and all because I was there in such a vulnerable state a being. I went to studying up on the pros and cons a staying or going again, but I weren’t getting nowhere with them thoughts. Then I heared a horse a-coming. It was off a ways yet, and at first I weren’t total sure. I thunk that I might just be a-hearing what I wanted to hear, but I stood still and listened real keerful. It were a horse a-coming all right.
At first I thunk that I had been saved. Then it come to me that I didn’t have no idee who it might be on that horse, and they was a-plenty out there what would just love to find me in that there helpless state what I was in. I looked around for someplace to hide my ass, but I couldn’t find nothing. Whoever it was that was a-coming was a-going to find me for sure. I didn’t know what the hell to do. And the horse was a-getting closer. I could tell. I looked around, and real desperate-like, I picked me up a rock. I had kilt me a buzzard
with a rock. Maybe I could hit a man before he drawed on me. It was better’n nothing.
Then I seed the horse in the distance. Not clear, though. It was kindly shimmering-like as it moved on towards me. I stood a-waiting for whatever it was that was a-coming at me. And it come closer. Then I got a real surprise. I seed that the horse didn’t have no rider. A wild mustang? A runaway? I got to wondering what it would do when it seed me. I hoped that I would be able to talk it into coming to me, but that weren’t none too easy with a strange horse. I tossed aside the rock I had picked up and stared at that horse, still coming right at me.
“Come on,” I said. “Come on.” And he kept a-coming. Then I seed that it was for real and actual Ole Horse. My Ole Horse. Somehow he had broke loose from Cherry and them and come a-running back to me. I swear to God, I hadn’t had nothing in my whole entire life that loyal to me since my poor ole dog Farty had been kilt by that damned Joe Pigg what I had then kilt and run off, and that had started me on this whole life a gunfighting and such.
I hadn’t never been so happy to see no one in my whole life as what I was to see Ole Horse a-coming at me. I let him get some closer, and then I yelled out, “Come on, Ole Horse. Come on.” He come a-running up to me and then he stopped, and I hugged him and kissed him and talked to him, and then I led him over to the crick to get him a drink. Oh, my, but I was happy.
When I got over my initial excitedness, I looked Ole Horse over. He were still saddled, and my saddlebags was still a-hanging on behind. I opened up the flaps and checked inside. They wasn’t nothing there. My first inclination was to jump on Ole Horse’s back and ride on out, but then I told myself that I didn’t rightly know how long he had been a-running. I decided to let him rest up some, so I pulled the saddle offa his back and throwed it on the ground. It hurt
me some in the doing. Then I rolled me a smoke and lit it and laid back and just enjoyed the sight a Ole Horse a-grazing and a-drinking nasty crick water. I figgered in just a bit I’d saddle him back up, and we’d head out.