The night had gone as usual when Alex and I were being pissy with each other. He’d been flippant, I’d been snarky, and we’d both retreated to our corners for the night to regroup for the next round. I’d had a reprieve from him today, however. On my way out the door for karate, he’d told me he wanted to do some research with the Amaranthine, and wouldn’t be around until late tonight. He’d also said Emil was dealing with Tate and wouldn’t be with me either.

I’d stared at him, a little stunned, especially after my decision to go to the party without backup. “You’re really leaving me alone? Trusting me?” He stared, arms folded across his chest. “That’s uncharacteristic of you.”

He raised one brow, nodding once in agreement. “I know, especially after your huge error in judgment last night. You should consider it a gift, because what I really want to do is lock you up in my house.”

I didn’t think he was talking about handcuffs and role playing, so I wasn’t too enthused. He’d left with a warning not to do anything stupid, and said he’d be checking in on me with his ring.

Karate had been a good way to take out my aggression. After I showered, I worked on some essays and reading for class. I also got an email from Hutch saying sorry for leaving the party early. I was just glad he and Vicki had gotten out of there safely. When my phone chimed in the middle of my homework, I picked it up and saw a text from my mom.

You have a care package coming. I sent some things for your friends, too.

I loved my mom’s care packages! They always had something yummy in them. I texted back. Thanks! You’re the best mom ever!

I got a smiley face. I wasn’t sure how many to send…?

She’d probably seen my Facebook relationship status updates, so she knew things were complicated. Granted, I hadn’t given her the paranormal details, but she was aware I had feelings for both Alex and Emil, and had no idea how to choose. I can share what you sent.

There should be plenty. Have a great week, sweetie!

I smiled. I love you!

I finished my homework, and then sat down to try muddling through what Tate had said. I mentally tabulated what had happened the night before. Went to a party I shouldn’t have, got in a fight with some Daevos, met my old brother-in-law, fought about going places alone, and fell into bed exhausted. I still was. One of these days, I’d like to wake up tired because I spent the night doing something fun.

I was on my second cup of caramel flavored coffee when Jasmine came down the stairs. “Hey! How’s your studying?” She had a big test coming up in one of her math classes. I’d rather get a Brazilian wax than do fractions. Jas excelled at it, though.

“Ugh,” she said, slumping down on the couch next to me. “I’ve been at it for hours, but it feels like days. What are you up to?”

I took a few seconds to answer. “Thinking.”

“About?”

The fact that the people who have known me longer than I’ve known myself don’t seem to know what I am or who I want, so what chance do I have at figuring it out? “Life, school, guys, where I want to be in ten years.”

“That sounds serious.”

I nodded. It was.

She stared at the mantle with me for a minute before leaning over. “You know what you need?”

Yes. I need a lobotomy.

“You—and I—need to relax. Let’s order pizza, watch a funny movie, get a bunch of Pixy Stix and Slurpees, and have a fun girls’ night.”

I turned my head to the side to see her better. “Like we used to have in high school?”

“Exactly! You need to get out of your head for a couple of hours.”

I smiled, thinking that sounded better than anything I could come up with. I wasn’t expecting Alex for a while, and I needed break. Plus, there was safety in numbers. Jas had an excellent yelling voice if we needed it. Alex was watching me with his ring, and I had the SOS bracelet if anything went wrong. There was no reason not to go get some food and have a good time. “All right, let’s do it!”

Jas threw her books on the couch as I texted Alex and Emil about my evening plans, and grabbed my keys off the table. We ordered pizza in the car and stopped at the store first. We got a bag of Pixy Stix and some chocolate, then went to 7-11 for two monster size Slurpees. On our way to get pizza, I sucked down my grape Slurpee while Jas did the same with hers—though she’d gotten blueberry. It looked like Barney the dinosaur had exploded in my mouth and Jas looked like the cookie monster was living on her teeth and tongue. The gigantic Slurpees were half gone by the time we got back to the house and popped in the movie from my DVD collection.

We got halfway through The Pink Panther Strikes Back before the sugar high kicked into over-drive. We were laughing at everything from the movie to the pepperoni on the pizza. Sugar highs are awesome! Every little thing becomes hilarious and you get the best ideas!

“This movie is so funny!” I giggled as Inspector Clouseau fell down the stairs. “I can’t stop laughing.”

Jas was on the floor holding her stomach, looking like she might be sick. “Me either!”

“We might go into a sugar coma.”

“Maybe!” Ha ha ha ha ha. “Know what we should do?” Jas asked.

I stopped laughing long enough to contemplate the plethora of things we should and shouldn’t do. “No, what?”

“We should go for a drive.”

“Where should we go?”

“To Emil’s.”

My eyes got wide. “Why?”

Jas ignored my question and grinned as she ran into the other room. She came back with a year’s supply of toilet paper and a bunch of plastic forks. “Come on!” she said.

Even in my sugar stupor I knew this was a bad idea. In high school we used to toilet paper yards, and stick plastic forks in people’s grass. It was always funny, as long as you weren’t on the receiving end and you didn’t get caught. Plus, we usually did it in the summer—when it was warm, instead of below zero. “I don’t think we should be toilet papering and forking Emil’s house.”

“Why not? It will be awesome!”

I scrunched up my nose. “He might think I’m flirting. What if Alex gets jealous?”

“Who cares? It will be super fun!”

When you’re in a sugar stupor, no argument will beat out something that is super fun. Jasmine handed me my Slurpee and some Pixy Sticks. “Here, these will help.”

I took a gulp and downed a stick. Jas was right. Almost immediately the thought of toilet papering and forking Emil’s lawn seemed like a superior idea, and probably the best plan we had ever concocted.

We pulled onto Emil’s block. I had only been to his house a few times and never in the dark, but I remembered it was the third house from the corner. We counted houses as we drove to make sure we didn’t unwittingly toilet paper his neighbor, since that wouldn’t be nice.

Jasmine took a makeup compact from her purse and swept some black eyeshadow over her cheeks, and then did the same for me. I doubted we’d be caught, but according to her, it was better not to risk the glare off our faces in case a car happened by. I looked in the rearview mirror, thinking I looked pretty darn hot. When the sugar high wore off, I’d probably look like I’d been in a barroom brawl, but that wasn’t important at the moment.

We crept out of the car, closing the doors as quietly as we could in a Mustang that was almost thirty years older than we were and had doors that sounded like a tank when shut. We each took several rolls of toilet paper and started throwing them in the trees and over shrubs. Jasmine was taking way too much time and kept talking. “Ssshhh!” I stage-whispered. “We’re going to get caught.”

I kept toilet papering as fast as I could; Jasmine didn’t. She’d stopped and was staring lovingly at a four-foot tall pine tree on the side of Emil’s yard. I walked over to her.

“What are you doing?” I asked, scrutinizing the tree.

“Isn’t it pretty?” Jas said.

Jasmine had decided to use her toilet paper like garland, wrapping it around the tree in waves.

“It’s like Christmas! I’m going to use the forks as ornaments.”

Obviously I was less affected by the sugar than Jasmine. “Did you even get the forks out yet?”

She nodded. “They’re on the front porch.”

I looked at her, confused. “Why did you put them there? You’re supposed to stab them into ground.”

“I tried. There’s too much snow and it’s frozen. So I left them on the front porch. Think how funny it will be when Emil comes out and steps on them!” Jas was giggling, and she wasn’t being quiet.

I put my hand over her mouth. “That was good thinking; it will be super funny. But we have to finish with the toilet paper and you have to quiet down or someone will hear us.”

She saluted me. “Aye, aye, Captain Charmin.” She went to the other side of the yard to toilet paper a hedge. We kept going tirelessly. Toilet papering in high school had never taken this long, but we always had a lot more people helping than we did now.

Suddenly, Emil’s porch light blinked on. Jasmine and I stopped in the middle of the front lawn, toilet paper in hand, like two deer caught in the headlights. We regained our mental faculties long enough for Jas to scream, “Aaaaaa!!! Every girl for herself!” She took off for the street frantically waving her arms in the air, but was penned in by shrub hedges on three sides of the yard and instead of getting away, ended up running in circles. I took the stealthy approach, hiding behind a three foot tall rose bush.

The sugar rush was wearing off and the circle running got the best of Jasmine. She crashed on the front lawn in a dizzy heap.

I was crouched behind the rose bush when Emil came out of the house to survey the damage. He stepped on the forks, looked down, and I almost burst out laughing. Jas was right, it was pretty funny. He definitely wasn’t expecting cutlery. I remembered to keep calm, though, so Emil wouldn’t see me. I was hoping maybe the Pixy Stix had made me invisible; Emil hadn’t seemed to notice me yet. He went back into the house. I was overjoyed we got away with it, and even happier that my hopes had been confirmed and Pixy Stix really were magic. I was almost brave enough to stand up from behind my cloaking rosebush and peel Jasmine off the ground when I felt a tap on my shoulder.

Damn the Pixy Stix and their false wizardry! “What are you guys, professional vandals?” Emil asked, surveying the damage.

I gave him a look full of stupor. “Who, us? We were just walking by and scared the crap out of some people toilet papering your trees and trying to stick forks in your snow. Criminey, who did you piss off?”

Emil laughed. “Is that how you’re going to play it?”

“Play what?” I widened my eyes, giving him my best innocent look. “We saved your yard’s life. Jas was so scared she passed out.”

Emil continued grinning. “And I suppose the black shimmery stuff all over your face is from fighting the vandals?”

Damn. I’d forgotten about the camouflage makeup. Luckily, I’m pretty good at lying. “Yep, sure is. Those vandals fought dirty. I’m probably going to have bruises everywhere.”

“Well, my neighbors will be really grateful when they find out you stopped the toilet paper bandits. I bet they’ll ask you to ID the vandals for the police. They’re going to have a huge mess to clean up.”

“What do you mean your neighbors? This is your house! We even counted houses from the corner to make sure before we—” Oops. I clamped a hand over my mouth in case any other admissions tried to escape. I’d seen him come out of the house! I knew it was his! And I’d still walked right into his little trap. Stupid sugar.

Emil had his hands in his pockets and was looking very sexy as he grinned. Obviously, copious amounts of sugar also aggravate my overactive hormones.

“Okay, fine, so what if it was us?”

“You’re going to owe me. Big time,” Emil responded. I wasn’t sure if his tone was playful or dangerous. Probably both.

“We would have gotten away with it if we’d been a little faster,” I reasoned.

He grinned in a way that was part amusement, part coddling. “You two couldn’t have gotten away with it if you were both invisible with duct tape over your mouths.”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “Now you’re just being insulting.”

“Next time you want to toilet paper someone’s house, don’t park your very recognizable car one house away from your intended target. Not only did I know it was you, I also heard you drive up. Second, whispering is advisable. You two were so loud my neighbors called to ask why there was a party happening on my front lawn. Third, the point is to get in, throw the toilet paper, and get out as fast as possible. You were here for forty-five minutes. I finally had to stop you before the cops showed up.”

“If you knew we were here, why did you let us destroy your yard?”

“You and Jasmine were more entertaining than TV.”

I snorted, annoyed that our best plan ever hadn’t gone over as well as we’d hoped. Just then, the wind kicked up, a chill running through me. Gunnison is a cold place to be after sunset.

Emil noticed me shiver. “I have some hot chocolate waiting for you if you want to come inside.”

“What about Jasmine?”

Emil cocked a brow. “When I saw you two out here running around like chickens with your heads cut off, I figured you were either drunk or stoned and called Zach. He’s on his way to pick Jas up.”

I gave him the most indignant look I could manage. “We aren’t drunk, or stoned, we just had a lot of sugar. I can take her home.”

Emil gave me a long stare, shaking his head slowly. “I’m taking care of you.”

Huh. That was the last thing I wanted to hear. I was afraid of all the ways he would try to take care of me. My mind immediately went to the kiss on my front porch, accompanied by a vivid visual of Emil pushing me up against the side of my house, my legs wrapped around him, his shirt buttons flying… “I have to go back to my house now.”

Emil raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Are you scared to stay here?”

“No.” Absolutely. Afraid didn’t even cover it. I was almost peeing my pants right there. I would never get the monster size Slurpee again.

“I’m the last thing you need to be afraid of, Evie. You know I would never hurt you. After you warm up, you can drive home—or I’ll take you.”

“That’s not why I’m scared.” Our eyes locked. There was silent communication between us letting him know I wasn’t afraid he would hurt me; I was afraid he would do the exact opposite.

Zach pulled into the driveway, got out of the car, and surveyed the yard. Finally, still shaking his head, he turned to Emil. “You must have really pissed them off.”

I shook my head. “We weren’t mad, just bored.”

Zach’s forehead creased. “Remind me never to let you get bored at my house.”

Zach went over and helped Jasmine up. “What’s all the black crap on her face?” he asked, looking closer. “It’s glittery.”

“Camouflage,” I answered. “It was Jas’s idea.”

Jasmine looked like she was sleeping on her feet. She also looked like she was going to throw up. Zach helped her stagger to the car. She woke up a little and waved to me as he was helping her buckle her seatbelt. When Zach opened his door, Jasmine leaned over, gave me a thumbs-up, and yelled, “We did it! Wooooo!”

“In the future, I think you two need supervision to play together,” Zach said.

I stuck my tongue out at him because I figured my response should be at the same level of maturity as the rest of the night’s activities had been.

“Thanks for calling me, Emil. I’ll talk to you later.” Zach got in the car and drove away with my partner in crime.

“You owe me,” Emil grinned.

I exhaled, my mind racing with thoughts about the favors I was going to have to acquiesce to. I followed him in the house. He handed me a cup of the best hot chocolate I’d ever tasted. “Wow! What did you put in this?”

“A secret ingredient,” he answered.

I gave him a wary stare. “Secret ingredient like I’m going to wake up in a field somewhere in a few days?”

He laughed. “No. It’s caramel sauce with a little salt. The caramel makes it sweet and the salt gives it a kick.”

I nodded and kept drinking.

“Where’s Alex?” Emil asked. “He was supposed to be with you.”

“Researching something.”

Emil’s eyes widened. “He left you alone?”

“I was pretty shocked myself.” I took another drink, holding the mug with both hands to keep warm.

“So, you remembered you were the Duchess of Blackwood?”

I choked on my chocolate, caught off guard by his question. I nodded once. “Probably the only time I’ve ever been someone important, I imagine. And judging by the fencing lesson you were giving me, I wasn’t very good at following the rules even then.”

He laughed. “No, you weren’t.” He paused like he was remembering the memory as well, “but it’s one of the things I loved—and still love—about you.”

“Did you always encourage me to create scandals?”

He grinned. “As often as possible.”

“How did TT feel about that?” Emil gave me a strange look. “Temperamental Tate,” I explained. “Did he encourage you to encourage me to break the rules, as well?” Based on the flashback of Cassandra overhearing Tate and Emil discussing our relationship, I didn’t think Tate would have been fond of potential scandal-making activities.

Emil smiled. “You should call him that and see what he does.” He paused to take a sip of his own hot chocolate. “He felt like we should stay as far off the radar as possible, but it’s not like the Daevos are known for following rules. He dealt with it.”

“Yeah, well, imagine my surprise when I found out you had a twin brother you actually got along with. When you first told me about him last summer, it seemed like your relationship was strained.” Actually, it hadn’t seemed like he had a relationship with his brother at all.

“We have our moments,” Emil said. “He’s always had issues with my feelings for you. He’s never been able to understand why I want to be with you so much.”

“Because he doesn’t believe in love?” I asked. “Or because he’s never felt it himself?”

Emil considered the question. “The Daevos don’t believe soul mates should be together. It’s ingrained in their heads from the moment they agree to take the Daevos vows. So, even when those feelings come along, it’s hard to accept them, or even understand and recognize them.”

“You didn’t have a problem,” I said.

“I also didn’t want to be a Daevos member,” Emil answered. “And I’d fallen in love with you long before I was forced to take the Daevos vows.”

He had? This was new information. I eyed him suspiciously. “How long?”

He slid his eyes slowly back to mine, like he was still processing the question. “A long time.” He answered. “Tate will come around,” he said, changing the subject. “He did when you were Cassandra, he will now. He’s just overprotective and doesn’t want me to get hurt again.”

“Speaking of TT, where is he?”

“He said he had some things to do and would be back later. It’s probably a good thing. We needed a break from each other.”

I got the feeling they’d had quite the argument after they left my house last night. “He said you got along, but disagreed on some things.”

Emil tilted his head in acknowledgment. “I would say that’s accurate.”

“How much of your argument had to do with me?”

Emil smiled, but didn’t answer.

“I get the feeling Tate and Cassandra weren’t the best of friends and he’s harboring some resentment.”

Emil shook his head, thinking about it. “No. That’s not it. Tate has always been protective of me, and thought you’d broken my heart when you left. He was incensed. It was years later before I trusted him enough to tell him I’d arranged for you to leave and had to force you to do it. He can’t help but remember how devastated I was. Plus, he’s watched me watch you ever since. He’s seen my heart break a little more each lifetime I couldn’t be with you. He’s always believed that loving you makes me weak. He doesn’t understand I’m strongest when I’m with you.”

Strongest because our bond made him more powerful somehow, or strongest because our love made us strong and together we could do anything? That seemed like a question I should ask when I was less strung-out on sugar. “So he’s holding something against me that happened centuries ago and wasn’t even my idea? Makes sense.”

Emil smiled. “He’ll get over it. He knows you make me happy.”

An unpleasant thought occurred to me. “And what if I don’t choose you? Do I need to be prepared for a Tate attack?”

Emil gave a sad smile. “He’ll respect your choice, we both will.” He paused, gnawing on his bottom lip, his eyebrows pushed together. After a few seconds, he looked up at me. “I’ve tried hard not to say anything bad about Alex to you. I want you to make this choice on your own, and my opinion could interfere. But in this case, I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you I think I’m the better choice, Evie.”

“Why?” I was really curious. I knew Alex and Emil both wanted me to choose them, but while Alex had given me an itemized list of why Emil was wrong for me—most of which included Emil being evil—Emil had never done the same.

Emil ran a hand through his hair, leaving it in messy, sexy pieces. “You and Alex were friends for years. Your families used to spend a lot of time socializing and the two of you grew up together. I’m not sure when he started to fall in love with you, but you were younger than he was and weren’t as interested in romance. By the time you were interested, Alex’s parents had died and he only came home from school occasionally for short visits. He was completely enamored with you. Eventually, you started to have feelings for him, too, but you had other suitors—me included—at that point. Had he been around instead of at school, who knows what would have happened?

“You had chemistry. It was as undeniable then as it is now. But you’re far too similar; you always have been. You butt heads like crazy. I think if you were in any sort of long term relationship with him, you’d start making plans for how to kill each other after a few months. I don’t think it would have lasted centuries ago, and I don’t think it would last now.”

“I thought the whole point of reincarnation was to grow and change. Maybe we’ve both changed enough that it would work.”

“It takes time for soul mates to get to a place where they can be together for eternity. You’ve changed, because you’ve been living different lives. Alex is very much the man he was two hundred and fifty years ago. He’s used to getting his way. A relationship without compromise isn’t a relationship, and that’s what you’d get with him. You’d be the one doing all the compromising, and you’re so stubborn, I’m not sure you would compromise if he didn’t. It would be a disaster. Maybe if he stopped being your Protector and continued the reincarnation process and you both grew, you’d be better together in a life somewhere in the future. But he’s not going to do that. I don’t think you’d want to live in your current relationship with Alex for the rest of eternity.”

It was interesting to see my relationship with Alex from another perspective, even if the source was a bit biased. Still, it was nice to hear more about what my relationships and life had been like as Cassandra. A thought struck me though. “Aren’t you in the same position as Alex?”

Emil thinned his eyes. “The situations might seem similar, but they’re not.”

“How is it any different?” I asked. “You haven’t been evolving either.”

Emil pursed his lips in thought, and then seemed to decide on an answer. “Daevos members have more freedom than Protectors. I haven’t been evolving through separate lives for the past two hundred and fifty years, but I’ve still been learning and growing. A Protector like Alex is stuck wherever you are. He may not be watching you twenty-four-seven, especially if there’s not a threat, but his life revolves around you. Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing. I’ve had the chance to travel, meet new people, have different life experiences. Alex has had some of that, but regardless of the experience he’s had, it’s always connected to you and an experience you’re having.

“I’ve watched you both for centuries, through many of your lives. While each soul’s human experience is all about evolution, there are other things—aspects of a soul rooted deep in their being—that stay constant. You and Alex are consistently stubborn. Could you really live with that for eternity? Could he?”

That was a good point. It would be like living with myself. I wasn’t sure if I could handle it.

“That’s the difference—one of many—between Alex and I, Evie. Alex thinks you’re his other half because you’re both the same. You share interests, you think alike, and you’re so similar, you argue constantly. That makes for good foreplay, but not a relationship. I know you’re my other half because we’re not exactly the same. I believe soul mates bring out the best in each other. They show each other how to improve. You make me a better person. So the question you have to answer is whether you think your soul mate is your twin, or your missing pieces.”

Emil’s perspective was interesting, and not one I’d considered before. I knew there was more to soul mates than hormones and attraction. Finding your soul mate gave you balance and made you a better soul. So the question was whether I was a better soul with someone exactly like me, or with someone whose strengths were my weaknesses and vice versa.

“I’m not trying to tell you what to do. I’m just giving you my opinion.”

Another difference between Alex and Emil. Where Alex pushed, pulled, and shoved to get his way and his point across, Emil calmly told me his perspective and let me decide for myself. It was refreshing, but at the same time, I wondered if it was almost too nice. I couldn’t help but think about Alex’s rationale that Emil couldn’t go toe-to-toe with me. I have a strong personality. Would Emil be able to hold his own against me, or would I steamroll him all the time? He held his own around Alex, so he’d probably do the same with me if it was something he felt strongly enough about. “I appreciate that,” I answered. I made a mental note to write down Emil’s thoughts and the information about my past life with Alex in my journal.

Emil leaned back against a kitchen chair. “Do you want to tell me why I was the target of your wrath tonight?”

I shook my head. “It wasn’t wrath,” I explained. “We decided to have a girls’ night to help me get my mind off everything that’s going on and we had too much sugar. That’s when we came up with the idea to toilet paper your yard.”

“Hmm. And why are there plastic forks all over my porch?”

“We were going to stick them in your yard so it looked like you had little fork headstones all over, but the snow was too frozen and wouldn’t hold them up. Jasmine thought it would be funny to leave them on your porch instead.”

Emil’s mouth hitched. “Well, at least I won’t have to buy forks the next time I have a barbeque.”

“You do that a lot, huh? Daevos barbeques? What’s on the menu, people’s souls?” The remark came across more cutting than I’d meant it to.

He looked at me like I should know better. We sat silent for a minute. “What things were you trying to get your mind off of?” he asked.

I narrowed my eyes at him like he was extraordinarily dense. I knew he was completely aware of what I was trying to get off my mind.

He smiled, long and slow. “I didn’t realize I affected you that much.”

I played with a thread on my sweater to avoid looking at him. “You, Alex, and Tate gave me a lot to think about.”

His eyes darkened. “I could give you more.”

I had no doubt about that. “It would complicate things further.”

“You wouldn’t regret it.”

I shook my head slightly. “We need to take this one step at a time.”

“Whatever you need,” Emil said. “Did you reach any conclusions about me while you were on your sugar high and trying not to think?”

“I think…I’m still thinking.”

“How long do you think you’ll be thinking?”

I shrugged, finished my hot chocolate, and put the mug on the table. Emil got up to put it in the sink. When he came back he leaned against the wall, folding his arms across his chest, watching me. “What’s on your mind?” I asked.

“You don’t want to know.”

He was probably right.

He moved away from the wall. “Come on, we need to get you home. I’ll text Alex and tell him I’ll stay with you tonight.” He grabbed our jackets from the closet, and took his keys off the TV stand. I drove my Mustang and Emil followed me home in his black-as-pitch BMW, which I’d nicknamed Satan since it looked like a car the devil would drive.

Emil walked me up the front steps and followed me inside. I flipped on the living room light, pulled my coat off, hung it on the coat rack, and put my keys on the table. It had been a fun night, but I was ready to crash. I moved toward the stairs. Emil watched me. “You will let me know when you figure out what you want, right?”

I stopped and nodded. He sliced his head down once in a quick motion, and started for the couch, but he paused and turned around. He came back to me, grabbed me by my shoulders, pulled me to him and kissed me hard. When he let me go, I was out of breath. “Just something to help you think,” he said. I managed to eek out a “good night.” He watched me with a scorching gaze until I forced my eyes from his, and stumbled up the stairs.

Emil’s urgent kiss haunted me while I washed my face and brushed my teeth. As I climbed into bed, my phone blinked telling me I had a text message.

“I thought hiding behind the three foot tall, leafless rose bush was exceptionally sneaky.”

I could text him back, but knew he was probably watching me through his ring so instead I answered out loud. “Don’t mock me. I’m not in the mood.” I’d forgotten about the downer effect when a sugar rush wears off.

“I’m glad you decided to take it out on him instead of me.”

“You’re next. Were you watching us the whole time?”

“I watched the destruction, but tuned out when you went in the house with Emil.”

That surprised me. Alex usually likes to know everything that’s going on. It was unlike him not to take an opportunity to spy. Maybe he didn’t want to see me with Emil though.

“You seem to be more interested in him all the time. Choosing Emil would be a bad idea.”

“Why? What’s so wrong about having a relationship with him? I’ve done it before, once that I actually remember, and it was good. I don’t recall what, if anything, I had with you.”

There was a long pause before the next text. “He’s a loose cannon, Evie. While he’s helped us the last few months, I still don’t completely trust him. I never know what to expect from him. He is dangerous. And you could do a lot better. With me.”

I didn’t respond. I was annoyed Alex was still questioning Emil after everything he’d done to help keep me safe. Emil wasn’t a traitor. He’d protected me for as long as Alex had, and loved me that long too.

“Think about what a life with Emil would mean.”

I folded my arms across my chest in stubborn defiance. “I have.”

“Really? Everything? You’ve completely thought this through?”

Well, I thought I had.

“Like the fact that he has to continue being a Daevos member and if you decide to stay with him, you’ll have to choose that life again?”

My mouth dropped open. “But he could leave, like I did. He doesn’t have to be part of that life anymore.”

“Unlike you, he’s an actual Daevos member. If he leaves, time will catch up with him and he’ll be dead within a few years—if his Clan doesn’t kill him, and you, first.”

It felt like every time I figured something out, another problem would come up. Why couldn’t I be in love with normal, non-supernatural guys? I shrugged, not wanting to think about it. “If it’s right, everything will work out.”

There was silence between us for about five minutes, then another text message.

“I checked in on you again when you got home. I’d like to kill him for kissing you.”

“You wouldn’t do that.”

“Don’t underestimate me.”

I was pretty sure Alex would never hurt Emil, but I didn’t want to get into an argument about it tonight. I needed sleep, and the clarity that sometimes came after I woke up. “I’m going to bed now, Alex. Don’t kill anyone tonight.”

He didn’t respond.