Chapter 17

Land of Havilah — Noah’s 49th year

Holding a bag of supplies in his right hand and with his left gripping one end of a large basket stuffed with clothing, Noah trudged through the shallow water with Tubal-Cain, who held the other end of the oversized container. As they neared the shore, Noah handed Emzara the sack. “I think this is the last of the items that we’ll need for now.”

Emzara placed the bag on top of a small crate on the beach and arched her back. Silently she took in their surroundings.

Needing a rest after three trips from the boat, Noah walked toward his wife and placed a hand on her shoulder as he took in the clean, glimmering sand and listened to the water gently lapping the shore.

She shrugged off his caress. “Leave me be.”

Sighing, he turned and went to sit on the sand beside Tubal-Cain, facing the sea. Noah couldn’t resist feasting his gaze on the display of God’s creation before him. “It’s very beautiful.” Enticed, he stretched a foot back into the refreshing liquid.

“Indeed. I spent a lot of time in this water as a child.” Tubal-Cain tilted his head toward the nearby woods. “I used to find the slimiest creatures under rocks or logs in that forest, and then I’d put them in my sister’s hair.”

Despite his revulsion of Naamah as an adult, Noah tried picturing her as a young child like Misha, and struggled to stifle a laugh. “I’m sure she loved that.”

“She squealed like a baby, and I’d get in trouble every time.” Tubal-Cain leaned back on his hands and chuckled. “It was worth it.”

Noah watched Emzara from the corner of his eye to see how she would react to the discussion about Naamah, but she never flinched. She remained the stoic shell of herself that she had become in the past few weeks. A band of longing tightened around Noah’s heart, and he ached to see her usual good humor and ready smile return. Losing her first child would have been difficult enough, but going through it just weeks after losing her father and close friend had been nearly unbearable. Surprised by her lack of tears in the first few days after the loss of their baby, Noah did his best to comfort her. But her demeanor eventually shifted from plain apathy to occasional outbursts of exasperation. While he didn’t like that she vented her anger at him, at least she came alive during those moments. In between these explosions of anger, she retreated. Not sure what to do, Noah eventually stopped trying to console her, and she rarely spoke to him. Privately, he wondered if she blamed him for everything.

He sighed and watched the boat, anchored about 50 cubits away, as it bobbed softly on the surface. The broad-leafed trees of the forest lined both sides of the narrow lagoon. Noah recognized most of them, but he spotted a couple that seemed foreign to him. I’ll have to check those out with Em. He let out a sigh, realizing the futility of that now. Colorful flowers topped low-lying plants near the water’s edge, their cheery petals a marked contrast from how he felt. A variety of animal chirps and clicks called out through the still morning air. “It’s a good thing we arrived at this point during the daylight, or I fear we may have sailed right past that little inlet.”

“We would’ve realized our mistake soon enough,” Tubal-Cain said. “The lights of Havil aren’t too far away.”

“We’re that close?” Emzara asked, taking sudden interest.

Tubal-Cain shrugged. “It’s a pretty long walk, but close enough for me to get there, check around a little, and return before it’s too late this evening.”

Emzara paced back and forth. “And you’re sure your family won’t be visiting this place while we’re here?”

“I really doubt it. If they’re planning another Serpent Ceremony three days from now, like Garun said, then they’ll be too busy making arrangements for that.”

Noah climbed to his feet and motioned to their belongings. “Let’s get all this inside.”

Two quick jaunts up a sandy trail from the shore to the beach home completed the task at hand. Noah set his second load on the wooden floor of the main room.

Emzara dug out some supplies from the largest container. “I’ll fix firstfeast right away.” She pointed at Tubal-Cain. “That should give you the energy you need for a long day.”

“Where should we stay?” Noah asked.

Tubal-Cain tipped his head toward the hallway that began in the middle of the back wall between the front room and the kitchen. “First chamber on the right.”

Noah took his time moving their supplies to the guest room. Frustrated by his inability to provide solace for Emzara and by her seeming indifference toward him, Noah tightened his grip on the door handle and pushed harder than necessary. He stepped inside and closed the door. After dropping his physical burden, Noah moved to the large, low-lying pallet adorned with multiple cushions and sat down, determined to release his emotional burdens. Emzara had every reason to sulk, but so did he, and sooner or later, she needed to break free from her mood. He did everything he could think of to be there for her, but she seemed disinterested in all of it. A tear formed in his eye as he pictured her smiling face on the evening she told him he would be a father. Em, I need you back.

Noah lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Creator, forgive me for my reluctance to speak to You these past weeks. I don’t understand why You’ve allowed all of these terrible things to happen recently. I can’t bear this pain alone. I know You’re here, but I want Em by my side too. If I’ve done something to hurt her, please help me to make it right. He closed his eyes and wiped the tears from the sides of his face. A strong sense of conviction washed over him. Gathering his thoughts, Noah continued to pray. Although I don’t understand all that is going on, I trust that You will always do what is right. Even if it hurts.

After letting out a deep breath, Noah stood and dried his eyes and cheeks. As he stepped into the hallway, he overheard Emzara asking Tubal-Cain something about the house. He entered the main room and Emzara’s countenance immediately dimmed; being run through with a grendec’s tooth would have hurt less.

“So many memories in this place,” Tubal-Cain said as he breathed in deeply. “It still smells the same as I remember.”

Noah offered him a weak smile. “How often did you come here?”

“Only about twice year. But I haven’t been here since” — he scratched his head — “maybe about 12 years ago. Once I started working with the smiths on a regular basis, I didn’t have the free time.”

“Firstfeast is ready.” Emzara spread three plates on the table between them. “It’s not much, but I’ll bake some bread today, and we’ll have a grand evenfeast tonight.”

“And maybe I’ll bring some food back from the city,” Tubal-Cain said.

Noah glanced at the assortment of nuts, dried fruit, and sliced vegetables on the tray, and his stomach growled. Ever amazed at her gift for making an inviting feast out of even the slimmest of provisions, he selected a few from each of the options and dropped them in the bowl in front of him. After stirring them together, he paused before taking a bite. “This looks wonderful, Em.”

She looked down at her bowl and started eating.

Noah suppressed the urge to vent his frustration and glanced at Tubal-Cain, who returned a sympathetic half-smile.

“Well, as soon as I finish, I’ll head into Havil with my new disguise.” He grinned and rubbed the beard he had grown during the voyage. “I’ll check with some people I trust to see if they’ve heard anything about what happened in Iri Geshem.”

“And you’ll make sure they don’t say anything about the three of us being here?” Noah asked.

“Of course.” He shoved another fruit slice into his mouth and talked around it. “Just wait for me here, and I’ll be back before you know it.”

“What if someone recognizes you and tells your father?” Noah asked.

Tubal-Cain nodded. “I’ve thought about that. If my father finds out, then I’ll act as if I were planning to pay him a surprise visit. If I get caught up in the city, I’ll send word to you through someone I trust.”

Conversation lagged and the three fell silent as they ate. Em, I miss your lively banter during a meal. Suddenly, his once-hungry insides changed on him and tightened. He lowered his spoon and pushed his bowl away.

“Is there anything you want us to do while you’re gone?” Emzara broke the quiet as she combined all the leftovers onto one plate.

Tubal-Cain stood and swiftly rewound his wrap over one shoulder. He grabbed Emzara’s hand and put it in Noah’s. “Yes, talk to each other and rediscover the love you’ve always had together.” He whirled and moved toward the door. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“Be safe,” Noah called out as he squeezed Emzara’s hand and watched her.

She slowly raised her head and met his gaze. Looking away, her lip trembled. “Noah, I . . . I . . . don’t . . .” Emzara slipped out of her seat and slid over to hug him. “I’m sorry.”

Noah stood and held her tight. Afraid to spoil the moment, he silently waited for her to speak.

Emzara brushed his cheek with her lips and backed away, wiping her eyes. “Can we go for a walk?”

Noah lifted her hand and kissed it. “Of course.”

Without another word, she led him outside. Turning toward the beach, she whispered “Which way?”

Noah pointed to the west side of the lagoon where some trees that he did not recognize stood. “Over there.”

They left the trail to the beach and waded through long grasses until they reached the edge of the woods. Watching Emzara, Noah smiled to himself as he thought about their different perspectives on life. A setting like this inspired him and ignited a need to examine all the various types of wood around him. But she would normally be on the lookout for any animals that might cross their path. Her fascination with God’s creatures had grown with each passing year, and now he hoped that these new surroundings would rekindle some passion in her.

“I’m sorry that I’ve been cold.” Emzara pushed her hair back with her free hand. “I just. . . .” She shook her head. “You didn’t deserve that.”

Noah put an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. “Em, I don’t know what I did wrong, but you know you can always —”

“You didn’t do anything wrong. You did everything you could to cheer me up.” She stopped and put her hand against his cheek as her eyes welled up. “I’ve never felt so lost, so helpless, and I never should’ve pushed you away. Forgive me.”

He nodded and placed his hand over hers, keeping it on his cheek.

“I was so focused on my own anguish that I barely even thought about the pain you were feeling.” She leaned in and rested her head against his chest. “Every time I saw you, it made me think of our baby and that it was my fault — that I was inadequate to be a mother or to be your wife — and all the heartache rushed back in.”

Holding her tight as she wept, Noah kissed the top of her head. He wanted to tell her of his suffering as well, but he decided to remain silent and allow their embrace to begin healing their wounds.

Emzara finally pulled back slightly and looked into his eyes. “I’m still working through my feelings and thoughts, but I’ll try to include you when I can. It might take some more time though.”

He cleared a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “Em, I love you.”

Her eyes flashed their old sparkle. “I love . . .”

Embracing her tightly, Noah dipped his head and planted an impassioned kiss on her lips, which she returned. Weeks of grief seemed to retreat, and the joy they once shared flooded back into his soul. With their lips still pressed together, he slid his arms around her lower back and stood to his full height, lifting her off the ground in the process.

Emzara pulled back first. Noah loosened his grip, allowing her feet to slowly drop to the ground. “Promise me something.”

“What?”

“That whatever tragedies arise in our future, we face them together.” He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “I need you more than ever in those times.”

She bit her lip and looked at her feet. “I’ll . . . try.”

A loud cracking sound in the distance drew their attention.

“What was that?” Emzara asked.

“Not sure. Let’s go see.”

Noah quietly led her through the forest toward the disturbance. A snort and then some stomping filled the air. Suddenly, the crashing noise rang out again.

“Over there,” he said as he shifted course.

Unrecognizable sounds emanated from an animal as it bellowed and snorted. Emzara wet her lips and slowed her pace slightly as they closed in. Movement in a small clearing ahead made Noah dart behind a wide tree several cubits in front of them.

“What are those things?” Emzara asked.

Noah shook his head, which she probably didn’t see, since her attention never left the two brownish-green creatures. He craned his neck to get a better view. Staring each other down, they stalked about on two legs in a large circular pattern. Noah estimated they stood about Emzara’s height but were at least twice that long from head to tail. Their most unique feature was the large bony mound on the top of their heads.

The animal closest to them stomped, reared back, and then charged its foe. The other beast lowered its head and dashed in. The spectacular collision echoed through the forest, and the two combatants slowly returned to the edge of the clearing. A snort from one creature triggered an angry blast from the other.

As they marched around their ring, Noah peeked at Emzara. As if she sensed his gaze, she glanced back at him, eyes full of wonder and an ear-to-ear smile etched on her face, before turning back to the observe the confrontation. The stomping of feet signaled another dramatic charge. This time Noah kept his focus on his wife, relishing her reactions as she marveled at the Most High’s creativity.

She winced at the thunderous crash that generated a moan from one of the beasts. Noah turned back to the battle, but it was clearly over. The creature on the other side of the clearing raised its head in the air and let out a victory cry. The other staggered away, hanging its head.

Ducking back behind the tree, Emzara gripped Noah’s hand and leaned close to his ear. “Incredible.”

“Have you ever seen anything like that?”

Emzara shook her head. “Not quite like that. Some male bleaters spar with each other but never so violently.” Her eyes lit up. “I can’t wait to draw them.”

A settled feeling returned to Noah’s soul, as her apathy faded. While neither of them would ever be the same, he hoped that this was the beginning of a new normal.