“I don’t think you’re a bad person, Carissa,” Kevin assured her.
“Well, my parents didn’t get mad at me or anything,” she went on. “They took me home and said all kids do stupid stuff, but, you know, I was going to a different school then and my reputation got really trashed. Those boys at the beach party told horrible stories about me, and I was so drunk I didn’t even know what all happened. I felt like a rotten person, Kevin. Oh Kevin, I bet now you think I’m some trashy girl!” Carissa groaned.
“Carissa, you’re not. You were just a kid. Your parents sorta failed you. A fourteen-year-old girl with sixteen-year-old guys! That’s just asking for big trouble,” Kevin told her. He felt sorry for Carissa. She was probably sorry she had said anything at all about that beach party.
Clarissa explained how she felt. “Kevin, you’re such a good person, and your grandparents are nice churchgoing people. I bet your mom was good as gold too. I don’t know why I said so much. I mean, I’ve never told any of this to anybody at this school. I just care about you so much, and I thought would you like me if you knew what a stupid thing I’d done? I just knew if I told you, I’d be safe because you’d never tell anybody else.”
Kevin wanted desperately to put Carissa at ease. So he did something he thought he would never do. He decided to share his secret too. “Carissa, there are problems in every family. My own father was in prison . . . he died in prison.” Kevin blurted it out.
Carissa stared at Kevin. “Oh Kevin, that must have been so hard,” she said.
Kevin told Clarissa about his secret. “I was just a little kid when it all happened, but it was tough on Mom. Dad got in a fight with another guy, and the guy cracked his head on the concrete curb and died. So my father went up for second-degree murder. I was just three years old. All I knew was that Dad didn’t take me to the park anymore and buy me strawberry ice cream. And then there was a riot at the prison, and some guards got hurt and some prisoners got killed. One of them was my father. I was about six. I had sort of forgotten my dad by then. I hadn’t seen him in such a long time. But they gave Mom his body, and she went to his funeral in Houston. She left me with my grandparents.”
Carissa reached over and covered Kevin’s hands with her own. “Kevin, that is so sad.”
Kevin dug the picture of his father from his wallet and showed it to Carissa. “He was about twenty here,” he explained.
“Oh, he was so handsome, Kevin,” Carissa remarked. “I bet that deep down he was a nice man who just made some dumb decisions that got him in trouble. Like me going to that stupid party. That’s what’s so awful about life. You make mistakes, and sometimes you can’t fix them because you don’t get a second chance.”
“My father was a boxer,” Kevin said, “a really good one. He won a lot of fights as a lightweight. He was on his way to qualifying for the Olympics, but stuff happened. He always struggled with a bad temper. I got that too. I have to work at keeping it under control.”
When they left the pizza place, they walked through a field where there were old pepper trees. A house used to stand on this lot, but it burned down years ago and all you could see were a few foundation stones and the pepper trees. Kevin and Carissa sat on the foundation stones and huddled in each other’s arms. Kevin had never felt this close to anyone in his life outside his family. Kevin touched Carissa’s cheek and turned her face toward him. He kissed her gently on the lips. She kissed him back, and, when they got up to walk on, their hands were linked.
After Carissa walked up the steps to the apartment where she lived, she stopped and waved to Kevin. Then he went on alone.
A strange, almost terrifying feeling came over Kevin as he neared home. He had told his secret. He had sworn to himself that he would never do that. But he had told Carissa because he was so eager to tell her something personal about himself when she shared her story of the beach party. His defenses had crumbled in his desire to comfort her.
Kevin told himself now that he had nothing to worry about. Carissa would never betray his secret. He had no doubt of that. And yet he felt vulnerable in a way he had not felt before. The bird had flown the cage. The door stood open. The bird was flying, who knew where?
Kevin did not tell his grandparents what he had done. He couldn’t. He felt that in a way he had betrayed his agreement with them.
Tubman High School was decorated with real and papier-mâché cactus and iceplant flowers. Trevor’s mother was in charge of tickets, and Sami’s mother was at the refreshment table. Everybody knew there would be no spiking of the punch with Sami’s mother in charge.
Jaris Spain’s mother was chatting with Alonee’s mom as the couples started arriving. When Kevin came in with Carissa, he overheard Jaris’s mother saying, “Oh dear, is that Nattie Harvey? She’ll spend the whole evening gossiping about everybody. Her kids have all graduated already. I don’t know why she comes to these events. I just hate seeing her.”
Alonee’s mother nodded. “One time I was yelling at one of my kids, and the next day everybody at church was offering to help me because obviously I was ‘overstressed’ and overwhelmed with being a mother. Nattie had heard me, and she wasted no time in spreading the word.”
Jaris’s mother chimed in. “She saw my husband one time unshaven and in his dirty work clothes, and before we knew it she was saying he lost his job and was now one of the street people. I was so embarrassed. I wish everybody would just stop talking to that woman.”
Kevin glanced at Mrs. Harvey. She was a tall, mature looking woman with hard eyes. She was now in an animated conversation with two other women. As Mrs. Harvey talked, she seemed to be glancing over at Kevin. He was sure it was just his imagination and yet. . .
It had been two days since Kevin shared his secret with Carissa. He was still nervous about it.
“Carissa,” Kevin asked, “am I imagining things, or is Mrs. Harvey looking my way a lot?”
Carissa shrugged. “I’m sure she’s not interested in us. She’s probably just looking around,” she replied.
Kevin and Carissa danced as the DJ put on all the right songs, a mix of the top forty with some reggae thrown in. Marko had made a date with a pretty girl named Jasmine, and he made it a point to be in the middle of the dance floor with Jasmine so that everyone would see his conquest. It was not until late, when the evening was winding down, that Marko walked over to where Kevin and Carissa were.
“Hey Carissa,” Marko said, “you doing okay?”
“Sure Marko, why not?” Carissa answered. “I’m having a wonderful time.”
“You can’t be too careful with guys, babe,” Marko said. “We all grew up together around here, but Walker here came blowing in from Texas a few weeks ago and who knows about him.” As he spoke, Marko’s eyes seemed to bore into Kevin like lasers. He had a smirk on his lips that sent cold chills down Kevin’s spine. Kevin couldn’t escape the uneasy feeling that something was wrong.
“What’s with you, Lane?” Kevin finally asked. “What stupid mind game you playing now?”
Marko continued to stare at Kevin; then he said softly, “You sweatin’ a little, bro? I hope you’re wearing good underarm protection, ’cause looks to me like you’re sweatin’. Yeah. I can see sweat jumping out on your forehead man. Hey, that’s too bad. You must be nervous about something. That’s not going to help your running game at El Capitan, you hear what I’m saying?”
“Are you drunk or what?” Kevin snapped.
Marko shook his head. “I’m stone cold sober man,” he sneered. “I’m being a good boy. No booze, no pills. Everything going along fine in my life. I got a great looking chick—Jasmine—who can’t get enough of me. And I got no worries. You don’t see me sweatin’—no way. But listen man, try not to let those worries get the best of you. When you lay down to sleep tonight, don’t let them gnaw at you like bedbugs.” He jammed his finger into Kevin’s chest, “Don’t let the bedbugs bite.” Then Marko strolled off to find Jasmine.
“He’s trying to mess with my mind,” Kevin said to Carissa. “He can’t win at El Capitan against me, so he hopes to mess me up mentally and get me off my stride.”
“What a freak,” Carissa commented with contempt.
But Kevin couldn’t help wondering if there was more to Marko’s behavior than just empty mind games. Did Marko know something? Had the secret about Kevin’s father leaked? But how could it? Kevin told only Carissa, and she would never betray him. Kevin was willing to stake his life on that. Carissa wouldn’t do anything to hurt Kevin. Still, there was something different about Marko, a kind of smug, self-confidence that he had not showed before. Marko had been angry, frustrated, and agitated in his eagerness to beat Kevin at the meet. Now, suddenly, he seemed to have an ace in the hole.
As he headed home, Kevin wondered if Grandpa had accidentally revealed the secret the other day when Tyron came around asking questions. Grandpa swore he didn’t let anything slip in conversation, but sometimes Grandpa got a little mixed up about things. Lately he couldn’t do his bank statements right, and Grandma had to take over, making sure he was deducting the amounts of the checks he wrote. A couple of checks had bounced. And Grandpa had finally agreed to stop driving his beloved pickup after he missed some stop signs.
Kevin didn’t have the heart to question Grandpa about his conversation with Tyron. Instead, that night, Kevin remarked, “Grandpa, I’m sure glad you didn’t fall for it when Marko’s friend came around digging for information the other day.”
Grandpa chuckled. “I seen enough snakes in my time to recognize one that comes slithering up boy,” he said.
That night, Kevin had trouble falling asleep. Marko’s evil prediction came true. Marko’s sneering face kept looming before him. Marko’s taunt rang in his ears. Kevin was tossing. He was changing positions. Suddenly, in the dark doorway of his room, he saw his grandmother. “You all right, Kevin? I hear you tossin’ and turnin’. You giving those bedsprings a workout. You’re not sick, are you?” Grandma asked.
“I’m okay, Grandma. It was an exciting evening, the dance and everything. And the meet at El Capitan is coming up. I’m just thinking about everything,” Kevin told her. Though none of that answer was true, it satisfied Grandma. The truth was that Marko Lane had managed to get under Kevin’s skin. Kevin was pretty sure Marko knew nothing, but he had a small, frightening fear that somehow Marko knew everything—that he knew Kevin’s father had killed someone and that he died in a prison riot. Kevin could imagine the looks from fellow students if that became common knowledge. Everything at Tubman would change for Kevin. Carissa already knew, so she would stick by Kevin, but it just wouldn’t be the same around school.
But how could Marko Lane have found out? How?
A large crowd came from Tubman to El Capitan for the meet on Friday. Kevin saw all his friends smiling and waving at him as he got ready for the event he had trained hard for: the 100-meter dash. Four boys from Tubman and four from El Capitan were running. The 100-meter was not a strong race for the El Capitan boys, so it looked like a Tubman Titan could win and take second place.
As Kevin waited for the race to begin, Marko came over. “Hey, you look tired man. Didn’t you sleep good last night? That’s too bad. Good athletes need their sleep, but then you got a lot on your mind,” Marko commented, winking.
Kevin ignored him but felt tense. That feeling was uncommon for him before a race. He worried that his muscles were tightening up.
Marko leaned over and said barely above a whisper, “Hey Twister,” he hissed. “What was your daddy’s name? Was he named Kevin too? Like father, like son. . .”
At the signal, the eight runners took off, but Kevin knew something was wrong. He wasn’t getting the speed he needed. His legs lacked the spring they always had. He wasn’t even breathing right.
Marko Lane surged ahead and was neck in neck with Matson Malloy. A boy from El Capitan was closing in on them. Kevin was lagging, barely passing Trevor and two other boys from El Capitan. It turned out to be a slow 100-meter race with no new records. It was the worst 100 meters Kevin ever ran, and he wasn’t even close when a boy from El Capitan beat Marko Lane over the finish line. Coach Curry came over to Kevin, concern on his face, “Kevin, you were way off your stride. Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yeah Coach, I’m sorry. I’m really tired. I feel kinda weak,” Kevin explained.
“You need to see the doctor. Maybe you caught a bug,” Curry said. “The boy who just ran that race in your lane wasn’t you Kevin. Do you want to be pulled from the relay?”
“No, I can do it,” Kevin insisted. “I can get myself together and do it.” He was determined that the day would not turn out to be a complete rout for Tubman. He forced Marko Lane’s ugly taunts from his mind by sheer force of will and tried to prepare himself to anchor the Tubman team.
Marko started the relay and ran a good lap, passing the baton to Trevor without a hitch. Trevor ran well, but not great, passing the baton to Matson, who ran a fine lap and smoothly gave the baton to Kevin. Tubman was narrowly ahead of El Capitan thanks to a good pole vault earlier, but Kevin knew losing the relay race would give the meet to El Capitan. The loss would be a bitter disappointment to the Tubman fans, who were expecting a great day.
The most inspirational person ever in his life was his mother. So Kevin brought her beautiful face into his mind as he ran. He remembered all her encouraging words throughout his life, even toward the end when she knew she wouldn’t be around much longer. “You’ll be great Twister. You’ll make me proud! Even if I’m with the angels, I’ll be cheering for you, Twister!”
When Kevin’s fingers closed on the baton, he felt the old speed return to his legs. He was breathing well and his legs were flying. The cheers from the Tubman fans were all he needed to push him over the finish line a few seconds ahead of the El Capitan team. The familiar chants came from the stands: “Twist-er! Twist-er!”
Marko Lane stood on the sidelines looking dumbfounded. Marko’s hopes had risen when Kevin lost the 100-meter race. He couldn’t believe Kevin had recovered enough to run the anchor lap so well.
Kevin looked around for Carissa. Usually she would be racing from the stands screaming at this point. He hoped she wasn’t so discouraged when he lost the 100-meter race that she ran off somewhere.
“Alonee,” Kevin called out, “have you seen Carissa?”
“No,” Alonee called back. “One minute she was right beside me and the next minute she was gone.”
Another girl spoke up then. “She was crying really hard, Kevin. When you lost the 100-meter race, she just burst into tears and started running toward the parking lot. I tried to get her to come back, but that girl was like freakin’.”
“That’s weird,” Kevin said. “She’s gotta know that you can’t win them all.” Kevin never expected Carissa to act like this. He was surprised and a little worried. He knew Carissa was proud of his running ability, but why would she take it so hard when he lost one race? Kevin was sure their relationship was built on something stronger than the fact that he could run well.
Kevin walked all over the field looking for Carissa. He thought maybe she was sulking nearby. But then surely she would have heard the cheers go up when Kevin successfully anchored the relay race. Surely then she would have come back.
Carissa had planned to ride home with Trevor, his friends, and two seniors from Tubman. So Kevin went to the parking lot and found the van.
“You guys seen Carissa?” he asked Trevor.
“No, we been waiting for her to show up,” Trevor told him, “but then somebody said they saw her running down to the bus stop. So I guess she caught a bus home.”
Kevin rode back to their neighborhood with Trevor and the others, but he didn’t go directly home. He jogged, alone, over to the apartment where Carissa lived. As he stood out front, he dialed her on her cell phone.
“Yeah?” came Carissa’s voice. She sounded strange. Her voice was thick, as though she’d been crying.
“Carissa, this is Kevin. I helped the team win the relay, so Tubman won the day. Alonee said you ran off when I lost the 100 meters. I was really surprised that you’d take it so hard. You can’t let stuff like that get to you,” Kevin said.
Carissa didn’t say anything.
“Carissa, listen. I want to talk to you. Come on down and we’ll go somewhere for a cola or something. Or should I come up there?” Kevin asked.
“Kevin, I ca-can’t talk to you now. Just go away. Please, just go away,” Carissa responded in a halting voice.
“I’m not going away. Carissa, what’s the matter with you? You got me really worried now. There’s something wrong with you. I’m not leaving here until I find out what it is. You might as well not try to hide from me,” Kevin insisted.