‘What do we do now then?’
I looked at the clock in the alcove and saw it was coming up on 8.30 a.m. I didn’t think Chris would want to sit around all day, especially with me, so I got to my feet. ‘Go home, get showered and go to work. I’m sure they’ll let you off with being late for once. We need to make sure we lead as normal a life as possible before we decide to do anything. I don’t have a boss other than myself, so I can do the brunt of it – I’m going to try and find Michelle.’
‘You’re going to need help with that,’ Chris said, straightening up and trying to add an inch or two to his height. It didn’t make any difference.
‘It’s fine. If I find her, or get anywhere near her, I’ll call the police. Let them deal with it. I’ll give you a call later and let you know what’s happening. If I don’t get anywhere, we can arrange a meeting between all four of us. See if we can talk the other two into doing what we think is best.’
Chris rubbed some life into his eyes and stood up. ‘You’re right. Not sure how useful I’ll be, but I haven’t missed work in a long time. They’ll be okay with me being late. I’ll ring them from the car and come up with some sort of excuse. Thanks for . . . well, you know.’
‘No problem. That’s what mates are for.’ I gave him a brief hug at the door and waved him off. Closed the door behind me and went back in the house.
I thought about being the last one.
I didn’t know what order we were being targeted, but for the first time I considered the idea that it could be me who was the only one left at the end.
I wasn’t going to let it get that far.
My phone pinged with a message, just as I was about to shower and try to make a plan. A message from Alexandra.
Just spoke to her mum. Still no sign. Will call soon. x
I wanted to deliberate over the kiss at the end of the message, but I couldn’t think about that then.
I thought about Alexandra being next and that was enough to keep me moving.
A shower is a good place to think, I’ve heard often. I stood under the water, turning the temperature up high. The cubicle steamed up and I closed my eyes, enjoying the heat on my body.
I didn’t think of anything for a few minutes. Allowed my mind to drift and just listen to the muted music trying to blast its noise over the water streaming down. I would have sung along to it, if I had any sort of voice.
Stuart’s face came to me. The way I always remembered it. Early twenties, laughing and joking around. Not a care in the world. Always ready for a good time. Then it morphed into another one I’d seen over the years. The guy on New Year’s Eve in 1999. Another time after that.
The Stuart from the woods.
What if Stuart wasn’t the body on the tracks? What if the reason he was in the woods was because . . .
I stopped myself before I could think any further.
Still, no major breakthroughs. No bright ideas. No clue as to how I was going to find Michelle.
Just, nothing.
Instead, I tried to think of reasons not to call the police and tell them everything straightaway. Tell them what I knew, who it could have been, and hope they found Michelle alive.
The only reason not to was that I would be going against the rest of my so-called friends. We all needed to be in agreement.
That was the pact.
I was drying off when I heard the doorbell ring downstairs. I tried to look out of the window, but couldn’t see who was at the door. I swore quietly to myself and pulled a T-shirt and jogging bottoms on.
The doorbell rang a couple more times and a bang on the door made me shout from the stairs as I came down.
Whoever it was knocked once more before I managed to get the door open.
‘Nicola,’ I said, hearing the surprise in my voice and then tried to stamp it down. ‘Are you okay?’
She didn’t say anything, pushing past me and into the house. I followed her inside, taking the towel I still had around my neck away and leaving it on a radiator in the hall. I found her in the kitchen, leaning on a counter and biting one of her fingernails.
‘You’ve heard?’ I said, stopping at the doorway. She was the only one in the group who hadn’t changed all that much in the years since we’d grown up together. Whenever she was angry about something, it seemed to change the atmosphere around anyone in the vicinity. It used to set me on edge, especially when I was the subject of her impatience. Eventually it became a running joke between us. Not that I spent any time trying to rile her. I reached over and flicked the kettle on. ‘Cup of tea?’
‘No, I don’t want a bloody cup of tea.’
I left it boiling, but switched on the coffee maker instead. ‘Michelle.’
‘What happened to her?’
‘I don’t know,’ I said, facing her and folding my arms across my chest. ‘But I intend to find out.’
‘Yeah, good luck with that. She’s probably shacked up with some bloke she’s met on Tinder and forgot all about the bullshit that’s going on. A quick lay to get over her dead ex.’
‘Hang on, that’s not fair,’ I began, but Nicola waved me off with a dismissive wave of her hand. I saw her breathing harder, seemingly trying to keep a lid on her anger and about to fail. ‘What’s going on? Why are you here if not because you’re worried about Michelle?’
‘I don’t know. You tell me.’
‘You’re gonna have to give me a bit more to go on than that.’
Nicola pushed away from the counter and walked towards me. ‘Is this all a game for you? Is that what it is? A way of making us do something stupid and confessing to something we didn’t even really do?’
Whatever I’d been expecting her to say, this definitely wasn’t in the ballpark. ‘I don’t understand . . .’
‘Just because you can’t get on with your life doesn’t mean we all have to live in the past. You might have convinced Michelle that someone had broken into her house, but it won’t work with me.’
It took a second, but it came to me then.
It won’t work with me . . .
My heart started beating harder now. ‘What’s happened, Nicola?’
There must have been something in my expression because she hesitated for a moment before going on the attack again. ‘You know damn well what’s going on. I don’t know what your game is, or what you hope to achieve, but I’m not going to crack on this. We’re not telling anyone about that man dying or about Mark bloody Welsh and his whinging mother on every TV show going. It’s that simple. I’m not giving everything up just because you can’t handle the guilt. It wasn’t just you there that night, we were all there. It’s our decision, not yours, and I won’t be bullied into doing something because of you. No matter what you leave in my house.’
I cocked my head at that, allowing the final puzzle piece to click and turn my blood cold. ‘What was left in your house?’
‘You know damn well . . .’
‘Nicola,’ I said, my voice echoing around the kitchen as I shouted, stopping her in her tracks. Her mouth closed instantly. ‘I haven’t been to your house in a while. I didn’t leave anything there and I definitely don’t have the first clue why you think I would do something like that. You know me better than that, surely?’
Nicola peered at me, her eyes softening as the anger seemed to subside a little. It wasn’t gone for long. They became mixed with fear, but shone somehow brighter. ‘Are you telling me . . .’
‘It was a candle, wasn’t it?’
She seemed frozen in place; rage barely confined. Staring at me and not blinking.
‘Oh my God,’ I said, moving away and facing the doorway. I shivered, realised I was barefoot in the kitchen – the tiles burning cold underneath my feet. I turned back to her and she hadn’t moved. ‘When did this happen? Does Chris know? He was only here an hour or so ago.’
‘He doesn’t know,’ Nicola replied, her voice quiet but with an edge I didn’t like. ‘I found it after he left early this morning. It was just like the one we saw in those woods – in a storm lantern. It was left on the back step. I wouldn’t have even found it this morning if I hadn’t needed to take the recycling out. Chris is going to freak out when I tell him about this. I didn’t even know he was coming here. We . . . we had a disagreement last night. He wants to go to the police as well. Obviously you were persuasive when you saw him yesterday. I am very much in the not telling a single soul camp.’
‘I know. It doesn’t matter now. Michelle is gone. Stuart was first. Now he’s after you or Chris and I’m not going to let that happen. We need to come up with a plan. We need to find her before it’s too late.’
‘If he’s got her already, then it is too late,’ Nicola said and her voice was firm. Decided. ‘We both know that. I’m not going to the police, Matt. That’s off the table as an option. If I have to stop this guy myself, I will. He’s not going to ruin my life.’
‘There’s not many ways out of this,’ I replied, pulling out a chair from the dining table and sitting down. I turned to face Nicola. ‘We need to think this through carefully. All of us. If something has happened to Michelle as well, then . . . I don’t know.’
‘We can beat whoever this is,’ Nicola said, moving across the kitchen and leaning on the chair opposite mine. ‘I’ve got no doubt about that. We just have to come up with a way of finding out who it is. That’s the first step. If we fail along the way, we always have that back-up idea of getting help, but that’s all it will be. We’ll be asking for help because we can’t see a way out of the problem.’
‘I can do this,’ I said, hoping she believed me more than I believed myself. ‘If I can’t, then we have to go to the police and tell them everything. We’re in too much danger not to. Does that sound okay?’
Nicola didn’t answer, looking at the ceiling and sighing audibly. She dropped her gaze and looked me in the eye.
‘Find him. Find Michelle. Then we can talk about what the next steps will be.’
I nodded in response, and didn’t ask what the next step would entail.
I didn’t need to. I knew what she meant by it.