How’s the duet going?” Rowena asks at my voice lesson the following week.
“It’s going.” I don’t add that I am completely getting into the Violetta character by developing a monster crush on Alfredo, a.k.a. Sean.
“You and Sean getting along okay?”
Huge understatement here: “He’s fine.”
Rowena nods. “I thought you two would make a good pairing.”
“Yeah, our voices sound great together.”
“Yes, but more than that—Sean seems like a boy who knows what he wants and is willing to work to get it. You’re that way too.” She takes something from on top of the piano. “That’s why I wanted to talk to you. Have you thought about what you’re going to do this summer?”
I smile. “Yes, actually. I was thinking about the University of Miami’s choral camp.” I bet she’ll be proud of me for thinking so far ahead. It’s only November.
“That’s great. But I had another idea that I think is exciting. There’s a summer opera program in New York.” She shows me the flier in her hand.
“New York?” I say. “Like, the State of New York—miles away? “Start spreading the news … That New York?”
“That very New York. Not the city, though. It’s farther north. It’s opera for high school kids. I have a friend on staff there, and she says if you’re as promising as I say you are, you could come stay with her and her family. Of course, you’d have to audition.”
“I’d have to fly to New York to audition? Mom would never go for that. She doesn’t even like me taking the train to school here.”
“All taken care of.” Rowena’s looking pretty pleased with herself. “You can send a tape. It’s due by March—one piece in English, one in a foreign language. You can use the songs we’re prepping for competition in February. Think you can handle it?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Oh, you have no reason to be nervous. You’re the most talented student I’ve ever had, and that includes college kids. You’ll get in for sure.”
“That’s not it.” My mind’s racing. I should want to do this. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do. And yet, part of me just keeps thinking about a gazillion reasons why not. I’d have to try out, and possibly screw up like I did at the auditions for the show at school. And if I did get in, I’d have to go to New York all by myself, when it already took everything I had just to get to Miami High School of the Arts. And then there’s Sean. The choral camp is just a one-week thing, but I think I’d go through withdrawal without Sean. I wonder if he could go too. “How long is it?”
“Six weeks. I thought you’d be excited. I know you don’t mind getting away.”
“Right. It’s just … no way would my mom let me go for so long.”
Liar. Mom’s going into Arnold overdrive. She probably wouldn’t even notice I was gone, until she got the credit card bill for the plane ticket.
“I’ll talk to her.” She squints at me. “Is there some other reason. Like a guy?”
“Of course not.” Liar, liar, pants on fire.
“Caitlin, I remember when I was a teenager.” Rowena stops, like she’s thinking very hard about what to say next. “I thought the relationships I had were so important—thought they were forever. But they weren’t. Very few people end up marrying their high school sweethearts, so it’s not worth it to make major decisions—or miss out on important opportunities—for someone who is probably just temporary. And besides, if he’s that wonderful, he’d want you to do what’s best for you. Being a singer will mean making some sacrifices as far as friends and romance.”
“It’s not a guy. You know I’m not seeing anyone at school.”
Rowena nods. “Yes, I knew there was no one there. I just thought maybe … I’m sorry. It was wrong of me to assume.”
That’s when I realize what she meant, why she’s so freaked out.
“I’m not back with Nick,” I tell her.
She makes a “sigh of relief” gesture with hand to forehead. “Okay. Then talk to your mom.”
I’m not at all sure I will, but I nod.
Opera_Grrrl’s Online Journal
Subject: Over the river and thru the woods, 2 Daddy’s mansion we go
Date: November 26
Time: 7:18 p.m.
Listening 2: Vienna Boys’ Choir Xmas Album
Feeling: Wiped
Weight: 114 lbs. (Holding steady ......... I barely ate dinner. See below.)
Spent Thxgiving with Daddy-kins. It was actually FUN b/c Courtney (a.k.a. my 1/2 sister, a.k.a. Thing 1) has become a vegetarian so she spent the *entire* time talking about the living conditions of turkeys & how they’re overfed 2 fatten their breasts & can barely stand up .......... and Macy spent the whole time yelling at her and saying she couldn’t eat the #@*! turkey she’d spent 5 hrs. cooking. LOL.
I could barely eat either, but that’s not a bad thing.
(BTW, did u know that turkey tetrazzini, a fattening use of leftover turkey, was actually named after a diva—Luisa Tetrazzini?)
On the way out, Dad gave me my Xmas gift (a month early, as usual), a pink iPod mini. “Your mom says u like music,” he says.
Très understatement!!!! Can u believe I thought he’d let me live w/him???? He knows nothing about my life!
After dinner I thought about driving by Arnold’s house on the way back 2 see if he’s home w/his family (Mom lent me the car instead of driving me 2 Dad’s) but the tryptophan, that stuff in turkey that makes u sleepy, was already kicking in, so I’m here, sacking out.