Tip 49: Fertile Void

In the beginning there was a clay pit with no level ground —
below the water table — with no soil.
A scarred landscape? Or an opportunity to build Eden?

The Eden Project

Many years ago I received some wise advice from a fellow student on the Masters Degree course in Counselling I was taking in California. At the time I was wrestling with a tough decision. Should I, or should I not walk away from a long-term relationship? I'd been struggling with this decision for so long that I had become completely paralysed. To me there was no clear answer and the more I thought about it, the more I seemed to be going round and round in circles.

I remember explaining to Barbara that what scared me about leaving the relationship was that I'd be left with a giant void. No-one special in my life and that frightened me.

After a few moment's silence Barbara asked if it would make a difference if, instead of thinking of it as a scary, empty void, perhaps I could think of it as a fertile void instead?

A fertile void, where new things can take root and grow. What a brilliant concept.

There are times in life when we have to take risks and let go of those things we know in order to clear the space for what we truly want and what, ultimately, will nourish us. After all, if a garden is choked with weeds and brambles, you have to dig them out and clear the space before you can plant new flowers and shrubs. In order for beautiful things to flourish, you need to clear the ground for them.

QUESTION: Is there something you need to let go of? Do you need to create the space in your life for new seeds to take root and grow?

Confusion is the state of promise,
the fertile void where surprise is possible again.
Confusion is in fact the state we are in, and we should
be wise to cultivate it.

Paul Goodman

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By letting it go it all gets done;
The world is won by those who let it go.

Lao Tzu