Tip 50: Last Words

True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.

Charles Caleb Colton

I’ve never forgotten this story which was recounted to me many years ago by a retired vicar — describing an event that had taken place at a funeral where he was officiating.

At the end of the service, as the coffin was being carried out of the church, one of the mourners jumped to his feet, ran after the coffin and grabbed onto it, crying in a highly distraught manner “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to say those things. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry.”

I found this image profoundly troubling. You’re left wondering what on earth this person had done or said, and thinking how awful it was that now it was too late and they didn’t have the chance to right the wrong they felt they had done.

Last year one of my oldest friends died — quite unexpectedly and far, far too young. I’d been thinking that I should give her a call and see how she was, maybe make a plan to get together. Now it’s too late and I can’t. I’m so sorry I didn’t make that call.

No doubt you can see where this Tip is going. We just don’t know what’s going to happen and when it might be too late to say the things we need to say to someone in our life. This is particularly pertinent if there has been some kind of misunderstanding or conflict.

Is there someone you’ve had a disagreement or argument with and with whom you need to smooth the waters? Is there someone in your life who needs to know that you love them, or how much you appreciate them?

Please don’t put it off. Don’t wait until ‘the time feels right’ — or easier — or whatever. You just don’t know when the opportunity might be taken away from you.

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.

Kahlil Gibran

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Never part without loving words to
think of during your absence.
It may be that you will not meet again in this life.

Jean Paul Richter

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Hold a true friend with both your hands.
Nigerian Proverb