Politeness is the art of choosing among one’s real thoughts.
~Abel Stevens
We bundled up in our coats, mittens and hats to head out the door to Grandma’s house. We loaded the wrapped gifts into the trunk and I saw that the kids were all buckled into their car seats. As we began to pull down the driveway, the kids were animated in their discussion of what awaited them at their grandparents’ house.
“I bet Nana made cinnamon rolls!” Kyle said.
“And Grandpa will probably get out some shrimp later!” said Karen, matching his anticipation.
There’s not much that’s more heartwarming than listening to eager children on Christmas morning. Before they got too much further into their holiday chattering, I thought it would be a good time to launch into my annual conversation about good manners. “Be sure to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ at Grandma’s today — at all of the meals and when you open your gifts — even if you don’t like something,” I lectured.
“Okay,” they responded, as if they were wondering how I could be thinking of something as boring as manners on an exciting day like Christmas.
“How grown-up of me!” I chuckled to myself.
We finally arrived at the house and the kids dashed inside. They would only ask fifty times when it would be time to open gifts and I would only remind them fifty times to mind their manners.
Finally, the moment they’d somewhat patiently waited for arrived. We all gathered in our designated spots. The kids helped their grandmother and various aunts and uncles pass out the gifts. Then it was time to unwrap the gifts, one at a time as everyone watched.
Every year, my grandmother created handmade gifts. This particular year, she had knitted rainbow-striped cardigan sweaters. My daughter’s was made with beautiful pastel yarns and my son’s was made with primary colors. As they opened their sweaters, I watched as my young, elementary-aged son pulled his out of the box, held it up with an awkward look on his face, and said, “Thank you! Even though I don’t like it!”
I was mortified as giggles broke out around the room. I couldn’t really discipline my son because he’d done exactly as I’d instructed him. He said thank you even though he didn’t like the gift. He just missed the context a bit.
Oh well! Out of the mouths of babes. Even my grandmother got a good laugh out of it and commented later that maybe the colors weren’t quite suited to a young man. Kyle gave the sweater to his sister, who was very grateful to have two! Her enthusiasm for the sweaters and the group’s laughter more than made up for my son’s unfiltered but obedient comment.
~Stephanie Davenport
