Chapter 5

 

Sarah saw the men returning late that afternoon through the kitchen window.

“Sarah!” Sophia called to her from the porch where she had been waiting impatiently for Gavin to come back. Sarah stepped outside to stand with her.

“Oh, my,” Sarah said as she watched the forms of Ellen and Regan Murdoch trudging up the main path leading to her cottage.

“They are from the compound?” Sophia asked.

Sarah could tell the girl was longing to run down the steps and throw herself into Gavin’s arms but even Sarah could see by the way Gavin walked—his head down, his hands swinging in fists at his side—that now wasn’t the time.

“They are,” Sarah said. The closer they got, she could see that Ellen was not well. Mike kept a hand on her elbow as if steering her. Regan stepped through the gate, looking around as if she hadn’t been there in months.

“They have a story to tell,” Sophia said softly.

“I certainly hope so.” Sarah grabbed the bannister of the porch and eased herself carefully down the stairs. She smiled at John as she passed him. Gavin went immediately to the center fire pit and began tossing wood around as if focused on building a fire. Regan stood at the edge of the cook fire watching him.

Sarah walked as quickly as she could over to Mike and Ellen. She held out her arms to Ellen, who broke down and began to weep. Sarah shot Mike a concerned look over Ellen’s bowed head as she took her friend into her arms. Through Ellen’s coat, she could feel how thin the woman’s arms had become.

An hour later, Sarah had put Ellen to bed in their cottage. It meant that Gavin and Sophia would have to move to another cottage after all, but now that Regan was here, Sarah thought that was probably for the best anyway. Clearly, Gavin had neglected to mention to Regan on the walk back to the compound that he’d married since he’d last seen her.

Leave it to a man, Sarah thought as she watched Regan put the pieces together in front of everyone. As Gavin had been building the cook fire, Sophia joined him and planted a demonstrative kiss on him. The gesture wasn’t lost on Regan who stomped off into the interior of the compound.

After Ellen was down for the night and a supper of potatoes, canned brisket and yeastless biscuits was cooking, Sarah sent John off to find Regan. While Sophia set the table in Mike and Sarah’s cottage, Sarah took Gavin out onto the porch for a quiet word.

“Ye needn’t bother,” Gavin said once they were outside. “Da already had his say.”

“I know you’re mad at her, Gavin,” Sarah said. “I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be but I won’t have you going off on her. Do you understand?”

“Aye,” he said with disgust. “I’m assuming you’ll be telling me now she’s been punished enough.”

“More than enough, frankly,” Sarah said. “You’re alive and married to a wonderful girl with your whole family, if not intact, then on its way there. Regan’s mother is ill, her father is God knows where, and she has to watch her ex-boyfriend in the throes of blissful marital happiness.”

“She doesn’t care about that. She tried to lead me to me doom.”

“Don’t over-dramatize. She does care about that and it hurts. A lot. I can’t explain it to you so you’ll just have to trust me. I’m asking you not to rub it in her face. She has a lot on her plate right now.”

“Whatever.”

The porch door opened and Mike stepped outside and frowned at them both. “Where’s Regan?” he asked. “Do I need to go get her?”

“John’s getting her,” Sarah said.

“I’m surprised you let him,” Gavin said as he headed back inside. “She’s not exactly harmless is our Regan.”

Sarah sighed as he left but Mike patted her shoulder.

“Don’t mind him,” he said. “The lad doesn’t have it in him to be a true wanker to her.”

“I can’t imagine how bad things needed to get for Regan to be turning tricks in a way station, Mike. Nobody deserves that.”

“Aye. But it’s over now. We’re here.”

She smiled. “Thank God for you.”

“Aw, darlin, it’s only the decent thing. When I don’t want to wring her neck, I’m feeling that sorry for her.”

“She has a gift for eliciting contrary emotions in people, that’s true,” Sarah said with a laugh. She saw John and Regan walking side by side up the walkway.

It hadn’t occurred to her before but John, always calm and logical, was a naturally soothing influence on Regan. Because he didn’t tend to be emotional and was very slow to anger, he came off as sympathetic to most people. She could hear the murmurs of their conversation as they approached.

It would do well to keep an eye on them, she decided. Being a soothing influence was all well and good but the fact remained that Regan was trouble. She’d always been trouble and she always would be trouble. And the bottom line to that little equation was that no matter how sorry Sarah felt for Regan—no amount of pity was going to make that particular fox welcome in Sarah’s henhouse.

 

*********

Even with John’s calming influence, dinner that night was a tense affair.

“Wash up please, Regan,” Sarah said as Regan and John came into the cottage. Regan was looking around the cottage as if she’d never been inside. She glanced down the hall to Gavin’s room where her mother was sleeping.

“There’s no water,” Regan said sullenly.

God! It’s just like having a bratty teenager. Sarah kept her temper in check and handed Regan a bar of soap and pointed to the porch.

“There’s a bucket out there.”

Regan shrugged and left the room.

“You too, John,” Sarah said. When he joined Regan on the porch, Sarah looked at Mike. He sagged into a chair and ran his hand across his face. She knew how disappointing today had been for him. Another day gone and still no answers. Sophia and Gavin sat down at the table as John and Regan reentered the room. Sarah directed them to their seats and sat while everyone filled their plates.

Regan’s hands were clean—and it looked like she’d taken a pass at her face too, Sarah noticed—but her hair hadn’t been washed in weeks and her blouse was filthy. The girl had been a murderous handful before she started turning tricks to survive. How was this possibly going to work for anyone?

They all sat down around the familiar cottage table.

“So did you find the village deserted?” Sarah asked as she passed the corn.

“There’s a few old folk there,” John said.

“Did they know anything about what happened to the people here at Ameriland?”

“They only heard from Regan that everyone had left,” Mike said.

“I’m surprised you didn’t invite them to come to the compound.”

“I did invite them. They’re barely surviving.”

“Before we left you were dead set against opening our doors to Ameriland.”

“A lot’s happened since then,” Mike said.

“I can’t believe you married this skank,” Regan said suddenly and dropped her fork on her plate.

“Regan!” Sarah said, her mouth falling open in surprise.

“You are a prostitute,” Sophia said simply, as if that was all the response necessary.

“Shut up, Regan,” Gavin growled. “You don’t know your arse from a cabbage.”

“Shut up all of ye,” Mike roared. “Regan, mind yer tongue and don’t speak if it’s only snakes and toads slithering out.”

Regan glowered at her plate.

“If she doesn’t want to be a part of Ameriland, Da—” Gavin said.

“Enough,” Mike said, holding up a hand. “She doesn’t get a choice about it and neither do you so everybody just shut up.”

“Mom says you don’t get to choose your family,” John said with a grin.

“Yes, thank you, John,” Sarah said dryly. “Very helpful.”

“I would never choose such a creature as this,” Sophia said, dabbing her napkin delicately on her mouth. “My appetite is gone.”

“Good,” Mike said. “You two can clear out. Regan will help with the dishes.”

Sophia hopped up and held out her hand to Gavin. “Is good,” she said. “I have secrets I’m telling you tonight, mia cara.”

Regan continued to stare at her plate until Gavin and Sophia noisily left the cottage for their own place next door.

“I’m sorry, dear,” Sarah said to her.

“I don’t give a shite,” Regan said.

“Well, that’s fortunate then.” Sarah looked at Mike who rolled his eyes. Both Regan and her mother needed a home. They needed a family. All the pitfalls would just have to be negotiated.

Just like any family.

After John and Regan finished the dishes, they joined Mike and Sarah outside on the porch. The rain clouds had vanished leaving a starry night sky. Mike smoked and he and Sarah shared a glass of wine. For a long while, nobody spoke.

“All this time I thought they left me and Mam behind,” Regan finally said.

“Be glad you were out picking berries,” John said as he tossed a pebble towards the main cook fire.

“It’s a mystery,” Sarah said.

“Well, yes and no,” Mike said.

Three heads turned to look at him.

“Did you find out something in the village after all?” Sarah asked.

“No. But if you think about it ye can riddle it out yourself.”

“Like how?” John said.

“Well, the fact that there was no struggle. What does that tell you?”

John frowned and looked at his hands and then up at Mike. “That they thought the people who attacked them were friends.”

“Aye. Or if not friends, at least not someone they’d expect an attack from.”

“Like our priest,” Sarah said pointedly. Even in the dark, she thought she saw Regan flush. That was a good sign. Regan had conspired with Father Ryan to lure Gavin into the woods where the druids were waiting. She’d been forgiven. But forgetting would take longer.

“Or the police,” John said.

Sarah gasped and her hand flew to her mouth. “Oh, Mike! Do you think it’s the Garda? Why would they?”

Mike shrugged. “Maybe they weren’t comfortable with the thought of a successful functioning community—fully armed—living like our own little country.”

“Do you think it’s that bastard O’Reilly?” Sarah asked.

When Sarah and Mike dropped off their prisoners in Dublin six months earlier, they’d had a run-in with the new Irish provisional government. Until then Dublin had not been aware of Ameriland’s existence.

“I told you guys that I met the new man in charge,” John said. “He didn’t seem like a dick at all.”

“Language, please, John,” Sarah said.

“It’s possible the attack isn’t related to him or the new government,” Mike said. “I got the idea that the Garda didn’t necessarily do what the government told them to anymore. Perhaps an outside party is involved.”

“But taking our electronics and guns is one thing,” John said. “Why would they take our people?”

“I don’t know, lad,” Mike admitted. “I just know that only the Irish police would be able to waltz in here with only a single shot fired.”

A long squeal broke the air and Mike jumped to his feet before the squeal disintegrated into muffled giggles from the cottage next door. Sounded like Gavin and Sophia were taking advantage of the first time they’d had a bed and a door in their married life. Sarah glanced at Regan but it was too dark to read her face.

“We’re not going to figure it out tonight,” Sarah said, as she put a hand on Mike’s shoulder. He turned to look at her and smile, his eyes going to her abdomen as if to ask, everything okay? She nodded.

“Let’s turn in,” she said. “Regan, you can sleep with your mother in Gavin’s old room.”

“I know where it is.”

I’ll just bet you do.

“Don’t stay up too late, you two,” Sarah said as Mike helped her to her feet. “Tomorrow’s a big day.”

“Aye,” Mike said. “And not a pleasant one.”

 

********

The next morning, Sarah and Mike were both the first ones up. The baby had been very active most of the night. As Mike lit the wood in the cook stove and settled the teakettle on top, Sarah sliced the bread she’d baked the day before and set out small bowls of honey and jam.

She paused to look out the kitchen window. It wasn’t raining for a change and she could see how spring might really happen this year after all. After the winter they’d all lived through, spring hadn’t always seemed like a sure thing. Mike came up behind her and slid his arms around her belly and kissed her on the neck.

He’d been through so much, first with Gavin and now Fiona. The last thing Sarah was going to let him do was worry about her, too.

“I love you, Mike,” she murmured as she turned in his arms. He dropped one hand to her bottom and gave it a squeeze.

“And me, you, darlin,” he said.

“We’ll find her. Whoever took them wanted them alive. That’s a good sign.”

“Aye.”

“Morning,” John said loudly as he came around the corner. “Or should I say warning?”

Sarah laughed. “Don’t be silly, sweetheart.” She broke away from Mike and went to her son to tussle his hair and kiss him on the cheek. “Did you sleep well?”

“Sure. When are we leaving to find them?”

“We have a few chores first,” Mike said ominously.

Sarah knew he was referring to Kendra’s burial. It was a sad way to start the day but long overdue.

“Not until after breakfast,” she said firmly as John sat down at the kitchen table. She looked over her shoulder as Regan emerged from the bedroom.

“Good morning, Regan,” Sarah said. “Your mother…?”

“She’s fine,” Regan said, rubbing her face sleepily. “Wants to rest a bit more.”

Sarah exchanged a glance with Mike. Whatever was wrong with Ellen was pretty clearly nothing in their power to address. It was true she was malnourished but her spirit was wounded which just made everything else worse. Her eyes were vacant and it seemed she had lost the will to live. At first Sarah thought it might be cancer. But Ellen didn’t look like she was in pain. She looked like she’d given up.

“Regan, you told your mother that your father didn’t just abandon you, didn’t you?” Sarah asked as Mike poured boiling water into the large brown teapot on the table.

“Aye,” Regan said as she sat down at the table. “Are the newlyweds still abed, then? Reckon Gavin’s making sure he gets it double this morning.”

The kettle hit the steel sink with a loud crash, making everyone jump as Mike whirled around to face Regan.

“We’ll not be having your filthy talk in this house,” he said loudly. “D’ye hear me, girl?”

Tossing the kettle in the sink had clearly produced its desired effect. Regan looked at Mike with stark fear in her eyes. Sarah could only imagine what she’d endured in the four months she’d been on her own. She went to Regan and put a hand on her arm.

“It’s all right,” Sarah said. “You know Mike would never hurt you, don’t you?”

Regan looked at Mike as if to confirm this, but her eyes were wide and unsure.

What in the world had happened to her?

“I’m sorry,” Regan said. She glanced at John and blushed and looked down at her hands.

“That’s all right,” Sarah said again, patting Regan’s arm. “We’ve all developed some bad habits in the last few months. And it’s going to take a while to get back to normal. Right, Mike?”

He looked so ashamed of how he’d frightened the girl that Sarah was torn between which of the two of them to hug. She opted for sitting down heavily in her own chair.

“Tea cups, John?” she said, surprised to find herself out of breath. John hopped up to collect a half dozen mugs and cups and brought them back to the table where he poured the brewed tea into them and then scooted them across the table to his mother and Regan.

“I’m sorry, lass,” Mike said. “Sure, Sarah’s right as rain. We’re all on edge these days. You watch your mouth and I’ll watch me temper. Fair?” He smiled at Regan and she nodded.

 

**********

The sun was full up by the time Mike and Gavin and John carried the forlorn bundle that was Kendra’s last remains to the plot behind the compound. There, Sarah stood with Sophia, Regan and Ellen and watched while the men dug the grave next to Mickey Quinn’s. There were hints of flowers peeking out of the woods that bordered the small clearing. Later, Sarah would ask Sophia to gather them up for Kendra’s grave. It would help her feel a part of the proceedings. Even though she hadn’t known poor Kendra, it would connect her in a small way.

Ellen stood with her arm looped through Sarah’s as they watched the shovels lift and fill, lift and fill. The sound they made was the only noise on the air. Not even the birds sang today.

If Mike was right and it was the Garda who had come and taken everyone away, then surely they’d taken them to Dublin. No one in the village had clear information about what they’d seen that day—if anything—so it looked as if the compound was the only target. That made it seem all the more likely that the visit had had something to do with Mike and Sarah’s run-in with them last December. The timing was right, too.

Four months.

Sarah felt Ellen’s hand pinch her arm as if trying to hold onto her tighter and so Sarah put her arm around the woman’s bony shoulders. Four months for a woman to waste away, body and mind, for a girl to be so desperate that she’d sell her body. Four months for whatever had happened to Fiona and Dec and all of them to still be going on. Were they better off than poor Ellen and Regan? Is wherever they are better than scavenging in the woods?

It didn’t seem possible that no one had escaped and returned. In four months? On the other hand, those were the winter months and they were hard for anybody everywhere in Ireland these days. And they had the children. Even the best escape plan would be handicapped by children.

A humming sound came from Ellen, deep and primal. When Sarah turned, surprised, she saw that the woman had her eyes closed. Regan stood on the other side of her mother, frowning. Regan took Ellen’s arm, but her eyes were on the body as the three men lowered it into the grave.

Goodbye, Kendra, Sarah thought. You were brave and strong. And we needed more of you not less.

The sounds that came from Ellen were low and melodic. She was singing, her eyes still shut.

“A Stór Mo Chroí,” Ellen sang, her voice clear and high, the only sound on the wind.

“When the evening's mist

Over mountain and sea is falling,

won't you turn away from the throng

And maybe you'll hear me calling.

For the sound of a voice that is surely missed

For somebody's quick returning.

A ruin, a ruin, oh won't you come back soon

To the ones who will always love you.”

They stood in silence until Mike broke the stillness by digging into the earth with his spade and throwing the first clods of dirt in the grave. Gavin and John began to slowly fill in the grave and Sarah touched Sophia on the shoulder.

“I need to get Mrs. Murdoch back to the cottage,” Sarah said. Ellen still hadn’t opened her eyes after her song and Sarah could feel the strength drop from the older woman’s fingers as they rested on her arm. Sophia nodded but glanced warily at Regan.

Sarah headed back toward the compound walls. The walk to the burial plot along the western wall of the compound had been a pleasant one thirty minutes earlier, but now the clouds had come out and an afternoon chill tore at their jackets and shawls. She was relieved to see Regan move to block the worst of the wind from Ellen who stumbled along between them.

Would they be able to leave Ellen alone to go find Fiona? Was that possible? If they left wouldn’t Regan just go right back to the village? Sarah’s pregnancy weight threw her off balance when she tripped over a tree root in the path. She let go of Ellen, grabbing instead for Sophia’s arm to keep from falling.

Ellen gasped and flung both her arms out, pushing Regan away.

“Barney!” she screamed.