Before the sheriff’s office completely cleared out, Jessie spoke to Michael and Beth. “We understand you’re on a tight schedule, but Ryan and I were wondering if we could have a few minutes of your time.”
“Of course,” Beth said. The four of them walked to an adjacent room where they could have a little more privacy.
Once behind closed doors, Ryan pulled out the gun Ken had carried and handed it to Michael, along with the bullets.
“Do you think he intended to use it on himself?” Beth asked.
“At first, I have to admit, I wasn’t sure. But now I’m convinced he brought it along in case he needed to protect himself from Thornton’s men,” Ryan said.
“He talked to you?” Beth was genuinely surprised.
“Not to me. He connected with Jessie.”
“So you don’t think he’s suicidal?” Michael asked Jessie.
Pausing before her response, Jessie said, “I think he’s looking for a way to break free from an incredible amount of guilt he’s placed on himself, but no, I don’t believe he will take his own life. It’s going to take a lot to work through his feelings, and we were hoping you’d let us help—as soon as this ordeal with Thornton is over.”
“I think that should be up to Ken,” Beth replied.
There was a knock at the door, and Reynolds walked in. “Better get going, Lieutenant.”
“Yeah, okay,” Michael said. Then he turned to Jessie and Ryan. “We’ll be in contact with you later. But thanks so much for everything you’ve done.” Then all four of them left the room, and Ryan and Jessie watched as both cars pulled away. The town was quiet. It felt eerie, like an abandoned ghost town. The only voices were those echoing from the local bar; a few intoxicated people were taking turns walking down the narrowly shoveled walkways.
Jessie shivered, and Ryan put his arm around her waist. “He’s going to be okay.”
* * *
Michael watched Ken through his rearview mirror. “You look exhausted, son.”
“It’s been a long day,” Ken replied.
“It’s been a long week,” Beth added.
“You guys mad?” Ken asked tensely.
“Mad doesn’t even begin to express our feelings, Ken,” Beth quickly responded.
“And how come you’re calling me Ken?”
Beth’s eyes shot a look of helplessness at Michael. She didn’t want Ken to know she’d read his journal.
“Does it bother you?” Michael asked.
“No. Just wondering. And how’d you guys find out about Thornton, anyway?”
“Actually, Jen told me,” Beth said.
“Jen?”
“Yes. She told me about you and Greg. She was threatened at gunpoint by Thornton’s men. They wanted to know where you were. She came to warn me about them.”
“Is she okay?” Ken asked.
“She’s fine, son,” Michael answered. He noticed Beth hadn’t mentioned the incident in their home. “I told her that you’d call when this was all over. Can’t be talkin’ to her before then. By the way, it’s bad manners to listen in on other people’s phone conversations. That’s how you found out Jan wasn’t really pregnant the weekend you came for your birthday.”
Beth’s eyes narrowed as they focused on Michael.
“And it’s bad manners to read someone else’s diary!” retorted Ken. “How did you guess my password?”
“It was me, Ken, not your father,” Beth tried softly. “And it took hours before I figured it out.”
“I can’t believe you read my diary!”
“And I can’t believe you got mixed up with drug dealers!” Michael boomed.
“Okay, okay, that’s enough. We’ve all made mistakes,” Beth said. “The important thing is that nothing has happened that can’t be fixed.”
“Patrick can’t be fixed,” Ken said.
“No. You’re right there. That can’t be fixed,” Beth said.
“You guys never even tried!”
“Ken, there weren’t any signs of Patrick’s unhappiness, or depression, or whatever it was he was feeling, at least that we could see. There wasn’t anything out of the ordinary that led us to even consider the possibility that he would kill himself. He didn’t take our gun and run away. Ken, if we would’ve had any reason to believe Patrick was suffering, we would have tried to help him.”
“Dad should have known!” There, he’d said it after all these years.
“What?” Michael boomed.
“You guys did everything together. If you were so close, you should have known! I heard you that day in your room, talking with Mom. You said you wished God had taken me instead of Patrick!”
Beth motioned for Michael to pull off to the side of the road. Smoot was immediately on the radio asking what was wrong. Michael relayed that they were just tired and needing a short break. Then he turned to face his son. “I never said that.”
Ken had forced himself to calm down. His voice low and shaky, he said, “Yes, you did.”
“Look, Ken, I don’t remember ever saying something like that. But if I did, well, I was messed up when your brother died.”
“So that’s it? That’s your apology? ‘I was messed up when your brother died’? News flash—so was I! And so was Mom. But hey, we at least tried to face it. You, well, you just left us!”
Michael put both hands on the steering wheel and put the car back in gear. “Now’s not a good time, son.”
“That’s not surprising. There’s never a good time.”
“Look, right now I gotta concentrate on keeping you physically safe. I gotta be a step ahead of Thornton. I can’t talk about Patrick the way we all need to. I’ve already promised your mom that we’d all get some help from professionals as soon as we can. That’s gonna have to do for now. Okay?”
“You going to stay with Jan?”
“I’m not ready to answer that either, son. I have decided, however, that as soon as I get back, I’m packing my things and heading to Uncle Bill’s.”
The silence was thick. Finally Ken asked, “Can we go to Jessie and Ryan for help?”
“If that’s what you want,” Michael replied. “Your mom and I will discuss it later.”
A slight whimper broke what had been several minutes of silence. “What’s that?” Ken asked, looking down at the now-undulating blanket on the floor opposite him.
“That would be your Christmas present from your father. He picked it out over a week ago,” Beth answered, surprised the puppy had slept this long.
The possibilities were written all over Ken’s face. He threw his seat belt off and leaned across the seat. He turned the cardboard box around and was met with paws and a wagging tail. “No way! This is really for me?”
Michael was relieved to have a diversion. “It really is.”
“What kind is he?”
“He’s part shepherd and part whatever-jumped-over-the-fence. He’s a mutt, son, but a good-lookin’ one.”
“Do I get to keep him inside, Mom?”
“Yes, he can stay in the house,” Beth surrendered. “But you’re responsible for all his puppy needs, which we’ll go over later. I hope we’re headed someplace he can have a dog.”
* * *
It was late when Ryan and Jessie arrived at the cabin. Gramps was snoring in the great room, Nelly at his feet. “Should we wake him?” asked Jessie.
“No. He’ll sleep fine there. I’m headed to the loft to unwind. You want to join me?”
“Sure.”
Refreshment in hand, Ryan and Jessie headed to the loft. Nelly followed them and laid her bulk at Ryan’s feet. Barkley made a quick exit from off the back of the couch and lunged toward the safety of Jessie’s room.
“What a Christmas, huh?” Ryan said, pushing the recliner to its fullest potential with Nelly perturbed at having been shoved out of the way.
“I’ll say.”
“Tired?”
Jessie yawned. “Exhausted is more like it.”
“Are you headed to your house tomorrow, since the path is clear?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah. But I’m coming back at dinner for leftovers and a movie. Unless of course you have other plans?”
Ryan smiled. “No other plans. Dinner and a movie sound great. I have something for you.”
“What? I thought we were all done with the gift giving!”
Ryan stood and leaned on the staircase before heading to his office. “I wanted us to be alone when I gave this to you. I’ll be right back.”
Jessie suddenly became anxious. Oh no, what if it’s a ring? He wouldn’t ask me to marry him. Not now. Please don’t be a ring, please—
“Here,” Ryan said simply as he handed Jessie a large manila envelope.
“What’s this?” she asked, relieved.
“Open it.”
Jessie slowly opened the envelope and pulled out a file folder. It was marked Samantha LeAnn Borne. “Ryan! This is my file from Family Services. How in the world did you get this?”
Ryan winked. “It pays to be the best in your field. All kinds of people can owe you favors.”
“How long have you had this?”
“A couple weeks.”
“But Ryan, you had to have broken several laws to get this.”
“Hmm. If it’s going to bother you—” Ryan reached for the envelope.
“No, no, no! You stole it—not me!”
“That’s harsh.” Ryan yawned and stretched. “Well, I’ll give you and your past some time to yourselves. Don’t stay up too late.”
“Ryan?”
“Yeah?”
“Merry Christmas.” She grinned, tilted her head, and gave her lashes a flit.
Ryan leaned forward and gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek. “Merry Christmas.”
* * *
Ken was asleep when Michael pulled in the driveway of the safehouse. Visibility had been unobstructed, and the roads were clear enough to make travel comfortable. As far as they could tell, they hadn’t been followed. It was in the middle of the night, and there had only been a few cars on the road, none of which had looked suspicious.
The house was a large, secluded rambler set on four acres, Michael had been informed, equipped with six bedrooms, three baths, and a large fenced-in yard that was currently buried under snow. After the suitcases were carried in and everybody chose a room for themselves, Michael woke Ken and Goliath in the backseat.
Ken rubbed his eyes and picked up the puppy. “We’re there?”
“Yes, son. Everyone is settled in. Gave you and the mutt the largest room. Don’t plan on getting too much sleep, though. Looks like he’s ready to play.” Goliath was squirming his way out of Ken’s grasp.
Ken put him down in the driveway and watched his new friend explore his surroundings. It seemed as if Goliath knew he had a lot of territory to cover and was determined to do so, but Ken was exhausted and finally picked up the little guy and carried him into the house. He took the next hour to get settled in his room. He gave Goliath the attention the dog was so adamant about being given, then he settled himself into bed with the puppy curled up next to him.
Early the next morning, Michael found Beth removing dustcovers and tarps from the living room and dining room furniture. The only information she got out of Michael was that the homeowners were on a sabbatical and wouldn’t return until spring. “Sleep okay?” he asked.
“No. How about you?”
“Not at all. Think I got the smallest bed in the house. It’s a twin.”
Beth smiled. “Okay. Compared to you, I slept all right.”
Michael reached over to help pull a tarp off the dining room table. “Smoot and Reynolds?”
“Up an hour ago. Smoot is making a check of the neighborhood, or something like that, and Reynolds was working on some kind of alarm system.”
“Sounds about right. I’m going to need to head out by noon.”
“I was hoping you could stay, Michael.”
“You know I can’t, Beth. I need to be closer to Thornton and the case. You’ll be safe here. I wouldn’t leave if I didn’t think you were in good hands. Smoot makes lousy coffee, but she’s the fastest and most accurate shot around. Reynolds’s instincts have always been right on, so if you do what he says, you’ll be fine.”
“I know. It’s just that I’d feel better having you here, and so would Ken, I think.”
“I’ll call every day. We need to set up a code word for both you and Ken before I leave. Only you will know yours, and Ken his. Not even Smoot and Reynolds can know. Understand?”
If Beth had been uneasy about Michael leaving before, she was even more so now. She moved to the kitchen and began pulling things out of drawers to put in the dishwasher. “I thought you trusted them.”
“I do. It’s standard procedure. There are a number of reasons for the code words to be kept silent. I don’t want to get into all that right now, but just trust me on this. I may have been a lousy husband and a terrible father, but I’m a good cop, okay?”
Beth bent over to load the dishwasher. “Okay. And, you weren’t a lousy husband, you just stopped trying.”
Ken walked into the kitchen carrying Goliath. “Okay, I don’t know about you guys, but I didn’t sleep at all. Anyway, we can take turns at night with him, right?” Goliath began chewing on his forepaw.
* * *
It was still dark outside, but the clock read 7:00 a.m. when Ryan entered the kitchen. Jessie was sitting at the table, sorting through a pile of papers from her file.
“Are you still awake or just getting up?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah, well, you know. I think I fell asleep for a couple of hours.”
Ryan poured two glasses of eggnog, setting one in front of Jessie. “How far have you gotten?”
“I stared at it for a long time before I opened it. I came across a copy of the letter that my mother left. The state must have made a copy of the original and kept it with all the other copies they made. Amazing. I could have had access to this once I turned eighteen—all those years of wondering why my mother left might have been avoided. Here, look at these.” Jessie shuffled through the papers to reveal a few black-and-white photographs. “This is my mother, and that’s Katie.”
“And who’s the adorable little redhead?”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look. There are the lilacs!” She pointed to the bushes growing wildly behind her mother, sister, and herself.
“Wow. Those were huge. What’s this?” Ryan picked up a sealed envelope.
“I’m not sure. There’s nothing written on the outside.”
“You haven’t opened it?”
Jessie took a deep breath. “No.”
“Okaaaay. Who’s this?” Ryan picked up a picture of a woman sitting in a porch swing.
“That’s Loretta Pine.”
“The sunbather you could see from your basement window?”
“Yes. I’m still embarrassed at that thank-you letter I wrote.”
“Like I told you before, you thanked the one person who provided you, however remote, with a sense of security during the bleakest time of your life.”
“I suppose.”
“Ah, your profile.”
“Yeah, I read that. There are some leads I’ll look into after the holidays. My mother’s lawyer is listed. That’s where I’ll start. Since I’m an adult now and my mother is deceased, I’m hoping he won’t see the harm in divulging any information he may remember.
“My stepmother’s last known address is also there. I’ll look her up and see if she’ll talk about anything she knows regarding my father’s past. It’ll give me the opportunity to find out about my stepbrothers and half sister too.”
Ryan looked at Nelly, who had sauntered in and lain down by her food bowl. “Nelly’s going through withdrawal.”
“I think she misses Ken. She wandered the cabin all night, sniffing at all the doors.”
“I’m going into Denver today to pick up some supplies. You want to come along? I’m taking one of Gramps’s trucks.”
“He’s letting you drive one of his trucks?”
“Well, the roads will be cleaner once we get out of the valley. They’ve been out there since the storm broke.”
Jessie closed her file folder and sipped at her eggnog. “You know, I think I’m going to head home and do a few things there.”
Ryan reached over and rubbed her hands. “You’re going to make me drive there and back all alone?”
She smiled. “Yep.”
* * *
Ken walked into the room his mother was staying in next to his. He watched as she pulled the sheets off the bed. The washing machine had been running all morning. “TV only has one good channel.”
“As long as it’s not one of those music-video channels, we’ll be just fine.”
“No, it’s a lousy news channel.”
“Where’s the puppy?”
“He’s still sleeping.”
“Don’t let him sleep too long this afternoon. And wear him out before bed, then maybe you’ll get a little better sleep tonight.” Beth carried the sheets to the laundry room and put the washer to use one final time. “Here, help me fold these towels,” Beth said to Ken. “Then it’ll be time to make everyone some lunch.”
“How come I haven’t seen Officers Smoot or Reynolds?”
“Oh, they’re around, trust me. Simply say their names loud enough and they’ll jump out from wherever they are.”
“How long do we have to stay here?”
“We stay until your dad tells us otherwise. I’m certain he’s meeting with the D.A. today. They’ve probably picked up Thornton and his buddies and are setting things in motion. With any luck at all, Thornton will plead guilty, you won’t have to testify, and we can all go home.”
“I don’t think he’s the type to just give in,” said Ken.
“You’re right. I’m not.” The throaty voice sent chills through Beth.