If winter comes, can spring be far behind?
—PERCY BYSSHE SHELLEY
So you’re cooking for the family, but you don’t really have the time to invent a seasonally appropriate recipe to honor the winter months. Well, try this one for size! A new spin on the pancake! In that it’s not at all like a pancake even remotely. It just involves a pan. So this is basically like calling anything you cook on a pan a pancake. Stir-fry? Pancake! Omelet? Pancake! Salmon fillet? Pancake!!!!
The point of this recipe is just to add maple syrup to something and call it “winter.” You’ve only got a couple more months to get through.
Ew. Hold up. I just noticed how dirty my laptop keyboard is. Hold on while I wipe it off real quick. It’s like mega gross and distracting. It looks like someone eats at their computer a lot. Or cooks with it open next to them in a kitchen while getting drunk.
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^^^Apparently that’s what it looks like when you wipe off your keyboard. I’m gonna leave it. Maybe it’s a code.
Cocktail
Shiraz! Because you’re Shiraz shit gonna need to be drunk to eat this.
Ingredients
* thinly sliced steak meat
* maple syrup
Instructions
Go to your local Mexican grocer and tell them you are making carne asada (WHICH IS DELICIOUS BY THE WAY). Then go home and pan-fry your thinly sliced steaks and create a maple syrup glaze. Don’t know how to make a glaze? No problem. Just pour maple syrup on that thing. Then walk away, because you don’t have time to worry about making seasonally appropriate meals when you’re just trying to get food on the table.
Your aunt is a vegetarian now, so use tempeh and call it a Panfake.
LET’S TACO ’BOUT IT: COMMUNICATION TIPS AND TRICKS
Never hold back from expressing your thoughts and feelings. It’s really not okay to just assume that nobody is going to understand you. At least give them the chance to understand you. It’s hard to make yourself vulnerable, but when you constantly set yourself up for disappointment, there is no room for them to prove you wrong. However, it’s true that people will not suddenly, magically become the people you want them to be. If someone has given you ample reason to doubt them—reason stemming from prior actions and results despite multiple attempts at change—then you can go ahead and cut that one loose, I’d say.
But check yourself. If you’re going to assume constantly that people are going to let you down, then that might be a good sign that you’re the one who is doing the down-letting.
