I picked up the last large piece that remained of the doors and chucked it into the pile out in the corridor.
I could’ve easily hurt Craig, killed him, but I was too wrapped up in my grief to notice if he held it against me or not.
The vote to end Kate’s life, that I knew he was ready to throttle me over.
But what choice did we have?
He saw her the same as I did, standing there in the courtyard beside Cassius.
She was the reason the wall collapsed, and the plagued army overran the dragons. She was the reason so many of my people were killed and their bodies left behind, no chance for a proper burial. And she… she was the reason why my father, King Kadin, was dead. I would never see him again. Never hear his voice again or hear his deep laugh. Just like the rest of my family, he was dead, killed by an enemy I hadn’t seen coming.
Several more days passed since we voted, and Craig hadn’t spoken to me. Not once. He locked himself away with Lucy and Tristan, as well as the shield shards. He was convinced they would save Kate, no matter how far gone she was.
I wanted to believe we could save her, but how could I after what I saw? What I felt? I’d reached for Kate in those few moments, and all I felt was a dark void of nothingness. The more time passed since my father died, the more I was able to gather my emotions, shoving my grief to the side so I could aid the dragons, at least those that remained.
We all mourned for what we lost, but many were still dealing with fear that the worst wasn’t yet over.
Any day now, Kate and Cassius would break into Boshen, and we’d be fighting for our lives all over again.
Tristan and Drake took in the injured and those not fighting, leaving only the fighters behind, but none of them were ready for a war like this.
It didn’t take an empath to feel the despair weighing on everyone’s shoulders, knowing the enemy outnumbered us and was being led by the one person meant to save us all.
Thankfully, Lucy and her coven brewed enough potion now that every arrow, spear, and sword was coated with it. Whether the potion would last long the entire length of the fight, we wouldn’t know until it happened.
I walked aimlessly around my chamber, playing tug of war with my own guilt in my decision to stop Kate before it was too late. We’d all come so far together and yet… it wasn’t enough to stop her from turning.
Wanting to go and talk to Craig, but already knowing he’d kick me out, if not worse, I flung myself onto my bed and closed my eyes. Rest had been in short supply since our retreat here, and I didn’t expect to fall asleep, but I dozed, and my mind drifted through an endless sea of twilight memories featuring my father. I missed him terribly. He was the leader, not me. I never expected this day to come, and definitely not so soon.
The images shifted and changed until I was no longer Kadin I saw, but Kate and Craig.
Her laughter washed over me like a tidal wave, and I was lost in the sound, feeling her hand cup my cheek, her lips against mine as we shared a few kisses. The three of us laughing as we sat around a campfire, acting like the kids we truly still were and not the heroes we were destined to become.
Or thought we were.
Then it was just Kate’s face in my mind’s eye, and she stared at me sadly.
She whispered my name, and I felt the ghost of her touch on my forehead, smoothing down my cheek.
Forrest… Forrest…
I thrashed on the bed, wanting it to stop, but then it turned into a scream of pain, and she was being dragged away from me, tendrils of shadow wrapped around her body.
Cassius cackled nearby as the darkness swarmed around her.
And I did nothing but stand there and stare. Bit by bit, it broke her down and all the while, she screamed my name, desperately trying to get to me. The betrayal in her eyes stabbed me like a dagger to the heart, over and over again until with one final scream, she was swallowed whole and vanished from sight.
Forrest… help me… please…
I jumped out of bed, drenched in sweat and glaring around my room. Stars filled the night sky outside my window, and I sank back to the bed, shaking my head.
“It was just a dream,” I told myself. “Only a dream.”
Forrest…
I got out of bed again, spinning around like a mad man in my room, half expecting to see Kate step out of the shadows, but I was alone.
“Great, now you’re going crazy.” I rubbed my face vigorously with both hands and left my chambers, hoping it would leave her behind, too. “Keep it together, there’s nothing you can do for her.”
But after all the hate I felt toward her, all the pain she caused me, the idea of watching the council kill her, of me or Craig delivering that killer blow drew an anguished cry from my mouth, and I fell to my knees in the middle of the torch-lit corridor.
What was I doing? I couldn’t kill Kate! My father was dead, but killing her, what would that do except open me up to the same darkness that tempted her, that turned her? I would become a monster and Cassius would win.
That’s why he’d done it. To drive me closer to the edge and forget what we were fighting for. What Kate was meant to do for us all.
A heavy hand fell on my shoulder, and without looking up, I knew it was Craig.
He sat on the floor beside me and draped a comforting arm over my shoulders. He said nothing, he didn’t have to. Regret and guilt drifted off him and bumped into me, as well as an unyielding hope and love so strong, there was no doubt of his feelings for Kate. He loved her, more than life itself, and no matter what I or the council decided, he wasn’t going to let them hurt Kate.
“I’m so sorry, my friend,” I whispered when I thought I could talk. “I was so blinded by my grief, I didn’t… I didn’t stop to understand…”
He squeezed my shoulder. “It’s alright. Better late than never to realize the three of us are far from finished with each other.”
“The shards, have you come up with a way to make them work yet?”
“That would be good news, wouldn’t it?”
“Nothing?”
He shook his head. “Lucy is as lost as I am on how to use them to find the rest of the shield, or even create a new shield using them. However it was formed all those years ago, I don’t think we can recreate it.”
“What do we do then?”
He stood and helped me up, too. “We wait for Kate to come and when she gets here, we get her away from Cassius and somehow, we’ll find a way to get her back.”
An ugly voice reared its head in my mind that she didn’t deserve to be saved, but that was far from the truth.
I clenched my jaw hard, and then Craig hugged me tightly like the true friend he’d become.
“I’m sorry we couldn’t save Kadin,” he said. “We’ll make Cassius pay, I swear to you we will.”
I had no doubt we would; I just worried we’d be too late.
“Come on, let’s go find some good demon grog.”
We headed down the corridor and though I was still angry at Kate, I would not be helping anyone kill her. Not unless there was no option left.