Molly glanced over her shoulder as Cath entered the kitchen, carrying her daughter Lucy and waving a newspaper in her free hand. ‘It’s war,’ she said grimly. ‘And Kitchener’s asking for volunteers.’
‘No!’ said Molly, dismayed.
‘He’s only asking for single men between the age of nineteen and thirty at the moment, although Jimmy’s in the street now talking about doing his bit. There’s dozens like him can’t wait to go.’
Molly thought, Nathan will be amongst the first being in the Reserves, and felt sick.
‘I don’t know what I’m worrying about,’ muttered Cath, putting down her daughter. ‘The French and our regular army’ll probably see them off before any of the new recruits are even trained.’
‘You’re right.’ Molly felt relieved. They probably wouldn’t call on the Reserves straightaway either.
Cath sat at the table. ‘Stupid to worry when there’s probably no need. But we might as well make the most of this breakfast. Food prices are going up. Sugar’ll be double the price tomorrow. George, give your Uncle Jimmy a shout. Tell him his breakfast’s ready.’
Jimmy’s eyes were ablaze with excitement when he entered the room. He sat at the table, humming ‘We’re Soldiers of the King’.
Molly and Cath exchanged glances and raised their eyebrows but kept their mouths shut. The next day he came home at lunch time with the news that Mr Collins had received a letter from the War Office telling him to report for active service.
‘You saw him?’ said Molly, rising from her seat.
‘No. Mrs Collins came in to tell us. He had to go immediately, the lucky dog!’
Cath made an exasperated noise and told her husband to shut up and talk of something else.
‘No,’ said Molly, putting a hand on his arm. ‘Tell me – where did he have to report?’
He shrugged. ‘I don’t know. She didn’t say and I didn’t think of asking. Does it matter? You can’t go chasing after him, Moll.’
‘As if she would!’ said Cath indignantly. ‘She might have been meeting him on the sly a while ago but she wouldn’t chase after him.’
‘How did you know?’ asked Molly.
‘I’m not daft. You’d come back looking different. Not exactly starry-eyed, but I knew.’ Cath glanced at Jimmy. ‘So shut up, you, about war.’
Molly walked out of the room, wishing she could have Nathan safely with her right now. She was going to have to keep in closer touch with Doris to find out how he was getting on. It was unlikely he would write to Molly herself after the way she had walked out on him.
A recruiting centre was set up in the Old Haymarket and most evenings in the Echo there was an advertisement stating Your King and Country need YOU. Despite Kitchener’s stating the war could be a long one, young men from Liverpool’s shipping and business offices rushed to volunteer. Lord Derby called them the Pals. A month later an advertisement appeared in the Echo, saying married men and widowers with children could now volunteer. Jimmy was one of the first and was soon off to Lord Derby’s green acres at Knowsley Hall where, dressed in civvies and shouldering a broomstick, he began his basic training.
Lucky Frank, he was out of it, thought Molly, as reports of the war filled newspapers daily and she worried herself sick about Nathan. One minute victories were being claimed. The next there were heavy losses and the need for more men was being announced. Molly collared Doris the next time she visited her mother, asking after Nathan and how Jessica was in his absence.
‘He’s written to her. He’s just outside Hull now at a training camp. He tells her mainly about the presents the townspeople have given them: fruit, chocolate, cigarettes, books and magazines.’ Doris ticked them off on her fingers. ‘Not bad being a Tommy, is it? He’s a lance corporal now, yer know? They want him to stay over here and train the men. It’s unfair,’ she said indignantly. ‘Charlie went and volunteered but they wouldn’t have him because of his hand. He’s real upset.’
Molly agreed it was unfair but like most women prayed the war would be over by Christmas.
It wasn’t. And by then she knew Nathan had decided to have a go at the Boche. He sailed to Le Havre in November and made it sound very jolly to Jessica, writing about sipping vin blanc and practising his French.
‘I don’t suppose it’s all fun, though,’ said Doris seriously. ‘He mentions the cold and I read in the Echo about some of them soldiers having frostbite in the trenches. I’ve taught Jessica to knit and turn a heel and she’s busy making him some socks.’
Molly was proud of her daughter and wondered at Nathan for risking his life when he had her to think about but she supposed it was what he had been trained for and now he wanted to put it into practice.
She was curious to know how they were managing at the factory but Jimmy was no longer around for her to ask. Cath and his mother were busily knitting for him and trying to keep their fears at bay. Already the Echo was displaying photographs and names of Merseysiders killed on active service.
It was towards the end of January 1915 that Molly discovered that Nathan was in Boulogne where he was having treatment for trench foot. The news came via Doris through her sister. Rob Fletcher had joined the navy at the outbreak of war and was serving on a troop carrier. Apparently he’d asked Nathan about the fighting and he’d made jokes about Fritz and whizzbangs and sausages. She guessed, though, that it was no joke at the front.
Molly was busy during the weeks to come. Miss Lightfoot, who was now in charge of the Garment and Embroidery room, turned up at the house, asking could Molly do some more work for them? She was pleased about that as it had petered out after she’d stopped seeing Nathan.
In March news came that Jimmy had been killed in action. ‘That’s it then, isn’t it?’ said a white-faced, pregnant Cath, crushing the telegram and flinging it on the fire. ‘He’s gone. He did his bit all right, didn’t he?’
‘Oh, Cath, I’m so sorry,’ said Molly, putting her arms round her, thinking this kind of news was the last she needed.
‘Not as sorry as I am or his mam will be.’ Tears thickened Cath’s voice as she struggled to control herself.
‘You cry,’ whispered Molly, her own mouth trembling. ‘It’ll be better for you.’ Cath sobbed on her shoulder and tears ran down Molly’s own cheeks as she imagined how she would feel if Nathan were killed.
After that sad news Cath was out of the house more often than she was in it, spending time with Jimmy’s mother, the pair of them comforting each other.
Miss Lightfoot called again, although more often than not a messenger brought work to Molly. They talked and when the other woman realised Molly was a shareholder in the business, she said, ‘You should be having more of a say in things. There’s talk of changes coming.’
‘What kind of changes?’ It was well over a year since Molly had received a report or any dividends from Mr Taylor.
‘To do with the war. We’re getting work from the factory in Leeds. That’s why you’re so busy. There’s talk of them using their building for the war effort.’
‘In what way?’
‘We haven’t been told. Maybe you should ask Mrs Collins?’
‘Do you see much of her?’
‘More than we used to.’
Molly was thinking of acting on what she’d said when Doris called. She told Molly that Nathan had been gassed and shipped home to a hospital in Birmingham. As well as that Frank was out of gaol and had now moved in with his mother. ‘And yer know why that is, don’t yer?’ she said grimly.
‘To be near Bernie, I imagine,’ said Molly, who was more concerned about Nathan.
‘Perhaps you should prepare yourself for a visit from your husband?’ said a concerned Doris.
Molly thanked her for the thought, and after she’d left decided not to wait for him to call but to take the fight into his corner by asking for a legal separation.
The next day she took a tram to Bootle. Ma opened the door just wide enough to poke her head out and glare at Molly. ‘Took yer time coming, didn’t yer? Well, yer too late. He’s gone.’
‘Gone where? To live with Bernie?’
‘To sea, of course,’ she snapped. ‘His country needs him. And Frank’s never been a boy to shirk his duty.’
Astonished, Molly turned on her heel and walked away.
It was a few days later that a German submarine sunk the passenger liner Lusitania and it occurred to Molly that Frank could have been killed. The whole of Liverpool was thrown into mourning and many women in her neighbourhood lost husbands or sons. People went on the rampage smashing and raiding the premises of German owned butchers, and music shops despite their proprietors having lived in the area for years. It appeared that the despised enemy, whom the press consistently mocked and belittled, were far more powerful and daring than most of them had believed. There was not going to be any quick solution to end the war as the Government had initially promised, and there were definitely more changes afoot on the home front.
Miss Lightfoot called again, informing Molly that this week’s work was to be her last. There was talk of the factory being closed down. Molly thought how Nathan had worked to make it prosper and came to a decision. Two days later with her finished work in hand, she put on her Sunday best and walked to the factory. She was fortunate enough to arrive just as Lottie was stepping down from her motor.
‘Mrs Collins!’ called Molly. ‘May I have a word?’
A frown creased the other woman’s smooth white brow as she stared at Molly. ‘I feel I should know you, but—’
‘Molly Payne. It’s a few years since we met. I’m Nathan’s second cousin and a shareholder in the company.’
Charlotte’s expression altered. ‘I thought you’d gone off somewhere? There were rumours.’
Molly felt embarrassed but wasn’t about to back down. ‘Well, you shouldn’t believe everything you hear. I’ve heard you’re planning on closing down this factory?’
Charlotte looked startled. ‘Who told you that?’
‘Does it matter? I want to know why. Whether it’s something to do with the war effort?’
‘Ah!’ Charlotte smiled. ‘I suppose you’re thinking about your dividends? Well, I can tell you that things are looking up.’ She clapped her hands and rubbed them together.
Molly smiled. ‘I’m glad to hear it. But I still want to know what your plans are?’
Charlotte hesitated. ‘Perhaps you should come inside and I’ll ask Miss Jones to bring us some tea.’
Molly followed her to the office which had once been Nathan’s and memories came flooding back. She longed to see him. After sending the secretary to make them tea, Charlotte waved Molly to a chair and sat down behind Nathan’s desk.
‘How many uniforms do you think an army needs, Mrs Payne?’
‘Thousands, I should imagine.’
Charlotte smiled happily. ‘Thousands and thousands! We’ve turning our whole factory in Leeds over to making them. We need more machines there and I just won’t have the time to be travelling backwards and forwards.’
‘I see. Does Mr Collins know?’
Charlotte’s eyes slid away from Molly’s and there was a pause before she said with a smile, ‘Of course. He realises that with him gone and most of the men, we won’t have the manpower to keep this factory going.’
‘You said manpower? It’s women who work in the Garment and Embroidery room.’
There was a pause. ‘I know that but with more men leaving soon—’
‘How do you know they’ll be leaving?’
‘The call for more volunteers will soon be going out. Lord Curzon has said we’re no where near the end of this war. Sacrifices are going to have to be made. The Church will have to wait for its cassocks and albs and candles.’
‘He said that?’
‘No, no. You are funny!’ Charlotte laughed. ‘Our French allies are covering themselves in glory, trying to hold back the Hun. They’re losing thousands of men. We have to get more involved. So there’s going to be a need for more uniforms, more guns and more shells. We’re fighting evil, Mrs Payne, and with God’s help our wonderful, brave men will defeat the enemy!’
Molly was completely taken aback. ‘I thought you were a suffragette, only interested in votes for women and their cause?’
‘I am. And this is the way to do it.’ Her eyes shining, Charlotte leaned across the desk towards Molly. ‘Mrs Pankhurst says we must get behind our men. Show them where their duty to their country lies. As I said, as more of them march off to war, women are going to have to fill their posts. We’ll show them we’re equal to the task and just as good as they are!’
‘I see. And does Mr Collins know how you feel?’
Before Charlotte could answer there was a knock on the door and she called, ‘Enter!’ Miss Jones came in with the tea tray and Charlotte sent her out again.
Molly took a biscuit and nibbled on it before saying, ‘Mr Collins, how is he? I heard he was gassed and in hospital in Birmingham.’
Charlotte fixed her with a stare. ‘Where do you get your information from?’
Molly smiled. ‘I have my spies.’
‘Well, they haven’t kept you up to date. He’s now down in Eastbourne convalescing at Summerdown Camp.’ Charlotte sighed. ‘He wants me to take Jess there as soon as the school holidays start. It’s a bore, really.’
‘Perhaps I could take her for you?’ said Molly, surprising not only herself.
‘You?’
‘I’m very fond of Jessica. I’ve known her since she was born.’
Lottie blinked rapidly. ‘I don’t know if I was ever told that. Or maybe I was. I’ve forgotten. What happened to your husband? Wasn’t he one of the heroes of the riots a few years back?’
‘He’s at sea now. Like you, I’m having to make my own decisions. I have my own clothing business.’ That was true in a way, although it sounded grander than it actually was. ‘I’ve been working flat out and could do with a holiday in the South.’
Charlotte held her gaze a little longer before smiling. ‘Yes, I suppose you could take her, seeing as she knows you.’
‘I’ll need some money. I’ve had no dividends for the last year. And I’d like that money, please.’
‘Of course! It’ll be a relief not to have to worry about my stepdaughter. What with Nat’s mother to keep my eye on as well as a business to run, I don’t know whether I’m coming or going. Nat’s sent me the names of some hotels in Eastbourne. I’ll book you and Jess into one.’
‘And my son as well, if you would,’ said Molly, getting to her feet. ‘I’ll come and see you again as soon as school’s finished.’
She did not know how she got out of that office without throwing her arms in the air and dancing. She was going to spend time in Jessica’s company, and hopefully sort out a few things with Nathan as well.
When she told Cath, her sister-in-law smiled. ‘I don’t blame you for going to see him. Make the most of it. Who knows if you’ll ever see him again?’
‘It’s not like that,’ protested Molly, reddening. ‘It’s purely business. I don’t trust that woman. She’s got the bit between her teeth and wants to run the Leeds factory flat out and sod Liverpool. I didn’t believe her when she said Nathan knew what was going on.’
‘Would she have agreed you could go down there if that was true? She must realise you’ll tell him.’
‘Why? In her eyes I’m not going down on business, I’m looking after Jessica.’
‘When in fact you’re going to tell Mr Collins?’
‘Of course,’ said Molly with a smile.
But when Molly next saw Charlotte she had changed her mind. ‘I’ve decided I should see Nat after all. I mean, he’s suffered for his country,’ she said with a sigh. ‘I should be a good wife to him.’
‘Then you won’t want me,’ said Molly, the sunshine going out of her day.
‘Oh, you must come too!’ Charlotte’s bright blue eyes widened. ‘I’d appreciate your company. It’ll be easier for me driving if you’re there to make Jessica behave – and I can tell you all about the Movement.’ Molly was surprised but did not argue. Better to be going than to be left behind.
Summerdown Camp was about a mile outside the town of Eastbourne, nestling at the foot of Beachy Head. It was surrounded by a wire fence but inside the army huts were set among gardens bright with flowers. Charlotte parked the motor outside the gates and they were directed to the hut which Nathan shared with several other men.
They found him sitting outside in the sun, reading a newspaper. He was clad in blue trousers, white shirt and red tie, the same as most of the men were wearing. The legs were turned up at the bottoms as the trousers were much too long for him. Molly felt very peculiar as she paused to watch him, allowing Charlotte to go ahead with Jessica. The girl broke into a run, shouting, ‘Daddy, Daddy!’
Nathan’s head turned and he rose to his feet, catching Jessica to him as she reached him. He hugged her tightly, kissing her hair. There was an expression on his face that caused a lump to rise in Molly’s throat.
‘You look a fright, darling,’ said Charlotte. ‘Isn’t there a tailor in this town?’
He made no answer, eyes going past her to where Molly and George waited. ‘Perhaps you’d like to fix them for me, Moll?’ he said with a glimmer of a smile. ‘You’re the seamstress.’
‘I’m on holiday.’ She smiled, relieved he was not going to hold that last farewell against her. She held out her hand.
Nathan clasped it firmly. Molly realised he was trembling. ‘How are you? You look—’ She searched for words as her eyes scanned his face.
‘A wreck?’ he supplied with a rueful grin.
‘You said it.’ She managed to infuse amusement into her voice. ‘But you’re alive and that’s the main thing.’
A shadow crossed his face but all he said was, ‘How about a cup of tea?’
‘We thought we’d take you out,’ said Charlotte, eyes going from his face to Molly’s. ‘I’ve the motor outside. That’s if you don’t mind being seen in town like that? Although I did think to bring you a change of clothes – just in case you only had your uniform. And I’ve brought you some money as requested.’
‘If you’d seen me covered in mud a few months ago you wouldn’t have recognised me,’ he said lightly. ‘In comparison today I’m fragrant and look devilishly smart in this gear. I’ll just get the jacket to go with the trousers. Come in and see our Home Sweet Home.’
The four of them trooped after him into the hut, Jessica clinging to his arm; George pressing close to Molly’s skirts as he glanced around. The beds were neatly made, the asbestos walls bright with hand-painted pictures displayed above the bed heads.
‘Pussy cat,’ said George, pressing his finger against the head of a tiger.
‘It’s a tiger, silly,’ said Jessica in superior tones. ‘And it could eat you up in one bite!’ She snapped her teeth at him.
He snapped back.
‘Oh, do behave, you two,’ said Charlotte irritably.
‘Who’s the artist?’ asked Molly, looking at the other pictures with a marvelling eye.
‘We all do our bit,’ said Nathan, shrugging himself into a blue jacket. ‘Shall we go?’
Charlotte took them back to their hotel where they had tea in a dining room overlooking the sea. There were plenty of people strolling along the Grand Parade taking the air and Molly would have found it relaxing if Nathan had not been sitting a foot away from her. As it was she was having difficulty keeping her eyes and hands off him. She sensed a great change in him and it made her feel divorced from reality. The discreet chink of china cups, the tiny fancy cakes on stands, the murmur of subdued conversation, the chandeliers and the southern voices, were all a far cry from home.
After tea he suggested they take the children crabbing on the rocks below the promenade. ‘Then you’d best carry on wearing that awful suit,’ said Charlotte. ‘Unless you want me to get one of the maids here to make it more presentable while you’re out?’
‘You’re not coming?’ he said.
‘Darling! Crabbing is hardly my style.’ She smiled sweetly at him. ‘But you enjoy yourself. I’ll have a snooze. I’m tired after driving all the way here, despite the stopover.’
‘You’re a Trojan,’ he said, brushing her cheek with his lips.
He and Molly were silent as they made their way to the beach. They stopped on the way and he bought buckets and spades, handing them to the children. George’s face lit up. ‘Thanks!’ For a moment he hesitated, as if remembering something. Then he dashed down to the beach with Jessica.
The two adults followed at a more sedate pace. It was several minutes before Nathan broke the silence. ‘What’s going on? How is it you’re here with Lottie? I was never so surprised in my life as when she told me you were coming.’
‘I had to see you. I’ve been worried sick about you. That time I walked out on you—’
‘Forget it. You’re here now, that’s all that matters. But you didn’t say any of that to Lottie, I take it?’ There was that old glint in his eyes.
‘No. I just offered to look after Jess. Did you know she’s planning on closing the Liverpool factory?’
‘Yes. Mr Taylor wrote to me.’
Molly was dumbfounded. She had thought Charlotte would have played her cards closer to her chest. Or maybe Nathan had spies in the company? ‘And you’re in favour of it?’
‘At the moment I don’t really care. You wanted to know how I am.’ His eyes clouded. ‘I’m one of the lucky ones. We thought we heard the order to retire and scarpered when we saw this yellow-green cloud coming towards us from the German lines. It was…’ His voice trailed away and
Molly saw beads of sweat break out on his face.
She slipped her hand into his and squeezed it gently, realising that the war was the only thing that had been on his mind for months. ‘Wicked and cruel, that’s the Hun! They’re devils who have to be stopped.’
Nathan looked down at her and she waited for him to agree with her but instead a shout of laughter burst from him and, keeping hold of her hand, he ran with her to the beach where the children were already digging in the sand.
Perhaps his mind’s going? thought Molly. But he seemed perfectly normal as he talked to the children about the sands at Blackpool. She felt tender, almost maternal towards him as she sat, hugging her knees, gazing at the three of them. She felt happy. Here were the most important people in her life.
Molly wanted her time in the South to be carefree but at the back of her mind there were always her feelings for Nathan and a determination to broach the matter of the factory closing again. It was getting time alone with him that was the trouble. Charlotte took them out most days in the motor to nearby Pevensey or Hastings, never seeming to want Nathan to herself. It was as he had said, their marriage was a sham.
In the evenings they had dinner and drinks and made conversation with other people at the hotel. There were plenty of wounded soldiers there who seldom spoke about the front, only talking of their off duty experiences in French villages or towns.
The day before they were due to return to Liverpool Jessica and George were asked to join a party of other children. Molly thought that she should offer to let Charlotte spend the last day with Nathan on her own. But, holding a hand to her forehead, she drooped against her pillows in bed and whispered, ‘I’ve got this terrible headache. D’you think you could see Nat and tell him I can’t come today? But I’ll definitely bring Jess to say goodbye in the morning before we go.’
‘Of course,’ said Molly, relieved.
Immediately she went and asked reception if she could have a picnic for two. Then she put on the cream blouse and green skirt she had made for the Whit holiday that year and hurried over to the camp.
Nathan saw her coming and came to meet her. ‘What’s up?’
‘The children have gone to a party and Lottie has a terrible headache. I’ve brought us a picnic. I thought you might know somewhere we could go. If that’s what you’d like to do?’ she added, feeling shy all of a sudden.
‘Right!’ he said, eyes bright. ‘I’ll get my jacket.’
He reached for her hand as they struck off from the rear of the camp and Molly did not pull away. Neither of them spoke as they climbed to the top of Beachy Head. Once there they sat together in the long grass. ‘The factory in Liverpool,’ she began.
‘You want me to keep it open?’
‘Yes.’
‘Then I will. You’ll have to work out how it’s to be done.’ He drew her to him and kissed her.
Only for a moment did Molly consider the moral aspect of what they were doing. Then she thought of how she loved him and how she would feel if he was killed before they had known their happiness again.
Nathan eased her down on the ground, unfastening her blouse. She drew his head on to her breast, remembering his face as he’d talked about the cloud of gas at the front. She determined to help him forget such horrors. There was no discussion about how far they should go.
Afterwards they sat, having their picnic, looking out over the Channel to France. They talked about the children. She told him about Bernie and Frank and her thoughts on getting a separation.
‘A divorce, Moll?’ said Nathan. ‘Nothing’s going to be the same after the war. If I survive I’m going to ask Lottie for one too.’ He gathered her into his arms once more.
‘Listen, I’ll write to my solicitor and ask him to make over a quarter of my shares to George immediately.’
‘But, Nathan—’
‘Shush! You’ll be his trustee and have the right to vote on his behalf. And I’m leaving another quarter to you in the event of my death.’
She couldn’t believe it. What would Mr Taylor think about Nathan’s changing his will? What would Lottie think? But probably she wasn’t going to get to know. It seemed impossible that Nathan would die. ‘Don’t talk about dying! I can’t bear it.’ She put her hand over his mouth.
He kissed her fingers. ‘I have to. In a way I hate it that the Leeds factory will make money from this lousy war but you keep the Liverpool one open. Even if it’s only making candles and selling incense burners.’
Molly nodded. ‘Will you tell Lottie what you’ve decided about Liverpool?’
He threw back his head and laughed. ‘And have her make your life a misery all the way home! No. She’ll find out soon enough from Taylor.’
After that they were silent for a while, avoiding any other mention of the future, watching small airships patrolling the Channel on the look-out for German U- boats. Molly wondered if they would ever see each other again.