Day 165: On Not Living Up To Your Ideals

Our behavior sometimes falls short of our ideals not because we’re bad people and not because our self-interest outweighs our benevolence, but because we don’t realize we’re not living up to our ideals.

—Russ Roberts 161

Self-awareness is an important part of the process of making any change. If you don’t pay enough attention to your actions, you won’t be able to ensure that you live up to your ideals.

Each week, perform a quick review. Ask yourself if your actions during the past week were congruent with your ideals, values, and goals.

For example, if my goal is to become a calmer, more understanding person, each week (or each day), I’ll ask myself if I exuded those emotions or let myself go — and in both cases, specifically when I did so, and how and why.

Knowing when you make mistakes will help you avoid them in the future and encourage further improvement. Don’t focus on mistakes alone, though. For motivational purposes, it’s also important to think about when you did live up to your ideals and feel proud of your progress.

Implement self-monitoring and periodic reviews in your routine, and you’ll increase your chances of making a new change stick. If you don’t evaluate your behavior, you’ll make everything harder.