‘Love you, Daryl!’
‘Love you guys, too. I’ll call you tomorrow.’
‘Make sure you do!’
I shut the car door and walked slowly up the drive. Will, not a bunch of flowers in sight, was sitting in my porch, on my front doorstep. He still looked completely wet through, but as he was out of the rain, his hair was no longer dripping torrents into his eyes; it was swept upwards in a damp approximation of its usual style. It looked cute. Really cute. And so did he.
‘Hello, Daryl.’
‘Hello, Will.’ I stepped into the porch, aware of not wanting to trip up in my heels. I pulled down the hem of my dress self-consciously, but at the same time I was glad I was wearing it. My bag and my half-a-cape were clutched in one hand. ‘This is a surprise.’ I realised I was shaking; my mind all over the place. What was he doing here?
‘I promise I’m not going to try and give you flowers again,’ he said. There was certainly no sign of them. It was just Will. Will in his smart trousers and shoes and his dark grey overcoat.
‘Okay.’
‘And I’m sorry if I startled you, approaching you on the street like that.’
‘It’s okay,’ I repeated. I felt so unsure of myself. I didn’t know what he was going to say; I didn’t know what I was going to say. I was half excited, half bloody terrified.
‘I’m glad you got home all right.’
‘Me too,’ I nodded.
‘Were those your friends? Who picked you up?’
‘Yes. My two best friends.’
‘Great. Good.’ He placed his hands in his lap like he didn’t know what to do with them. His eyes were all big and brown, and framed by eyelashes that were damp. ‘So how was the graduation? Were you okay? Freya’s dad, your ex-husband was there, was he?’
‘Yes, he was. And his new girlfriend who used to be my best friend.’
Will raised his eyebrows. ‘Ah, is that a story for another day?’
‘It could be.’ Would it be? ‘And yes, thank you, I was okay.’
‘That’s good. I was a bit worried about you.’ He moved his hands from his lap and motioned towards the door. ‘Are you going in?’
‘Yes.’
‘Would it be okay if I came in… as well? I’d like to talk to you. Try to talk to you again. If I may.’
My heart started beating in my chest. He wanted to come in. He wanted to talk to me. Was Sam right?
‘Okay,’ I said. ‘Yes, that would be okay.’
‘Oh. Here.’ Will stood up and held out a multi-coloured envelope. ‘Some more post came to me by mistake, this morning. That rookie postman still can’t read, I’m afraid… it might be important… Sorry, it’s a bit wet. I’d left it in my porch to remind me to give it to you.’
I took the envelope from him. His fingers were cold and slightly damp but they lingered on mine for a fleeting second. Our eyes met then I looked away. Oh, it was only a bit of junk mail. A charity thing with a free pen; I could feel it through the envelope.
‘Thanks,’ I smiled. Then I put my key in the lock and stepped into the hall, with Will stepping in behind me.
‘Hey, this looks good,’ said Will, pretending to look around him all surprised. ‘Do it yourself?’
No,’ I grinned nervously. ‘I got a man in.’
‘Good brushwork.’
He grinned right back at me – we were standing quite close to each other again. What was it with me and this man and halls?
‘Shoes on or off?’ he asked. He was asking that, at a time like this?
‘Keep them on, it’s fine,’ I said. I liked the height my heels were giving me. They made me feel less nervous. I didn’t want to be padding round in my bare feet as I’d feel more vulnerable, somehow. ‘Right. So,’ I said. ‘Shall we go in the kitchen?’
He followed me into the kitchen, where I placed my bag on the side then turned on the big light. Ouch, that seemed too bright, so I swiftly turned it off again and switched on the under-cupboard strip lights instead. That was better; I hoped the effect was akin to candlelight, but doubted it. I shrugged off my cape and folded it over the back of a kitchen chair. I was glad he was seeing me in this dress but at the same time I was glad my bottom was facing away from him, wedged as it was against a counter top.
‘Nice dress,’ he said, giving me a gentle – and what I hoped was appreciative – smile.
‘It should be – it cost me a bomb!’
He took his coat off, too, folded it and put it on the worktop. He was wearing a casual chambray shirt; it suited him. ‘I hope you didn’t get any offers tonight,’ he said, in a teasing but good-natured manner. ‘You, in that dress.’
‘I get offers every night,’ I replied, in an equally teasing but good-natured way, but with my cheeks warming with a sudden blush. It was true, I pretty much had, this week, got lots of offers. Never mind that most of them were unsavoury.
‘Daryl,’ he said hesitantly. ‘Can I ask you…’ – and it came out all in a rush – ‘… are you still seeing that speed-date guy?’
‘No,’ I said. ‘I told you I wasn’t.’ Why was he asking? Why was he asking this now? And why had he teased about ‘offers’? My pulse quickened and I felt a little light-headed.
‘I just want to be clear why you rejected my flowers tonight.’
‘Ah,’ I said. ‘The flowers.’ I sighed. ‘To be honest, Will, I wasn’t happy with your apology.’
‘Can you please expand on that?’ He looked all plaintive again.
‘You were telling me you’d made a mistake. No woman likes to hear from a man that kissing her was a mistake.’ I sounded pretty flippant but my heart was going like the clappers. What was he going to say?
He paused for a moment, then nodded. ‘Ah. Right. No, I agree,’ he said, and I held my breath, waiting for him to continue. ‘But that’s not what I meant.’
I exhaled, just a tiny bit. ‘What did you mean?’
He sighed and wiped a hand across his brow. ‘The thing is…well… God, no wonder you said what you did, really. I didn’t articulate myself properly… I was nervous…’
My heart was beating ridiculously fast. ‘I can’t imagine you being nervous.’
‘Oh, I can be, believe me,’ he smiled, running his hand through his hair. ‘I’m nervous now.’
‘Are you?’ I realised I was holding onto the edge of the kitchen worktop, like a ballast. My heart was now in danger of stopping altogether.
‘Yes! For god’s sake, Daryl, you’re not making this easy for me. Can I please just explain myself to you?’
‘Okay.’ I wasn’t making it easy for him, was I? I was just suddenly petrified of what he might say.
‘Can we start with me being a jealous numpty?’
‘Jealous?’
‘Yes.’ He looked so serious. My heart kick-started and really began to race now. All those feelings I’d tried to squash since last night – since I’d met him, in fact – were flooding back round my body and I wasn’t sure I wanted them to. I didn’t dare hope they were worth re-igniting. No, he is not that good looking. No, you have no desire whatsoever to kiss him again. No, you do not think he would make the best boyfriend ever. He couldn’t hear my heart could he? He couldn’t see my body shaking or notice my cheeks flushing in the glow of the under-cupboard lights? I hoped my pupils weren’t dilating to the size of saucers, like those of dogs in cartoons.
‘I haven’t behaved particularly impeccably this week,’ he said and cleared his throat slightly. ‘I thought – and I think you gave me that impression – that you’d been out two nights with the same man, Tuesday night and Wednesday night. I saw you go out again, that second time; you looked lovely.’
‘Thanks.’ I’m polite; it just slipped out. I was really gripping the worktop now. I had given him the impression I’d been out with Ben two nights running…
‘You’re welcome.’ He smiled, a nervous sort of smile. ‘I was worried it must be getting serious really quickly. I was jealous… and I sort of panicked. I thought, as us blokes say, I’d better get in there, quick, ask you over to mine for Halloween. Stop you from seeing him for a third night, I suppose. I didn’t dare ask you about your love forecast – the whole ninety-nine percent chance of love thing you told me about – and if it was working out.’ I’d forgotten he even knew about that. Fancy him remembering that. ‘So, I invited you to spend Halloween with me.’ He looked all guilty. ‘And it all went really well, didn’t it?’
‘Halloween?’
‘Yes.’
‘It did.’ All I could think about was that he was jealous. Jealous!
‘Then we had that kiss.’
‘Yes.’ I looked away. I was blushing again, beneath my half rained-off make-up.
‘That kiss was… pretty amazing.’ Oh god, he’d felt it too. Had he really felt it, too? ‘But then my annoying sense of what’s right kicked in. We’re neighbours, new neighbours at that. We’d become pretty good friends, Daryl, at least I thought so. I didn’t want to ruin what we had. You’d just got divorced; you needed a friend, not some next door neighbour trying to get off with you… I was sure it was the last thing you wanted… and I did feel terrible because you were seeing someone and I’m really not the kind of bloke to steal someone else’s girl –’(Girl, I loved that, despite the fact he was telling me why he hadn’t wanted to carry on kissing me). ‘– And…’
I gave him a half-smile.
‘Angie,’ I said.
‘Angie?’
It was so hard to read the look on his face, but I suddenly knew, with my heart deflating like a balloon, that I was right and Sam was wrong. It would never work between Will and me; there were too many obstacles between us.
I sighed. ‘You couldn’t carry on kissing me because of Angie. You’re not ready to move on. I completely understand. You don’t want to be on some tragic rebound with a neighbour you hardly know – although maybe you’ve had lots of other rebounds, who knows, you’re so good looking – and… well, you really don’t want to rebound with me, do you, if you’re not ready? I’ve only just got divorced, as you say. I’m hardly a catch… I’ve got a big bottom, I…’
‘Daryl,’ he said quietly.
‘Yes?’
‘Will you come somewhere with me?’
‘What? Where?
‘Next door. I want to show you something.’
‘Your etchings? Ha ha.’ It was a feeble joke and no one was laughing.
‘No.’
‘Okay.’ I felt more than nervous now, suddenly. ‘Shall I put the kettle on first? Coffee, tea..?’
‘No.’ The way he said it made parts of my body tingle. Oh god, he was all commanding and serious and sexy. What did he want to show me? And he took my arm and led me out of the front door (I remembered to grab my keys, on the way out; I’m sensible like that) and across the front of his house through to his side gate, and across his garden to his summerhouse. The rain was still coming down but I hardly noticed. It could have been hail, snow and thunder and I still probably wouldn’t have noticed.
Even as we approached Will’s summerhouse I could tell there was something hugely different about it. There was a wavering yellow-y, orange glow coming from inside. The windows looked all clean. A cute hanging basket of winter blooms was above the door.
Will had the key in his pocket. He opened the door. I stepped inside and, I couldn’t help it, I let out a surprised gasp.
‘Oh my god, Will, a Calamity Jane make-over!’
It was clean, it was tidy; it had been completely swept of dust and cobwebs. All of the teetering pile of junk had gone. There were candles on the little ledges all around the walls, flickering merrily in little silver candle holders. Two garden chairs, with striped canvas seats, immaculately clean and pretty, sat opposite each other at a small, scrubbed wooden table. And on the table was a jug of flowers and some sort of pie, pale orange in colour and sitting on a white plate, as well as two mugs, a thermos flask and a pot of what looked like clotted cream. I realised it was also lovely and warm in there; an electric fan heater was on in one corner, chucking out heat.
‘Do you like it?’
‘I love it.’ My voice was barely above a whisper. What was all this about?
‘I’ve done hot chocolate. Do you like it?’
‘I love it,’ I repeated. ‘Who doesn’t like hot chocolate?’
‘And there’s George,’ he said, pointing at the pie. ‘What’s left of him. I made it last night.’
‘You and your insomniac baking…’
He shrugged. ‘What can you do? It’s when I do my best work. Please sit down.’
I sat down, looking around me and marvelling at everything, whilst trying not to shake. My foot immediately started going, under the table. When had he done this? When had he transformed the summerhouse? He poured the hot chocolate and cut us both a slice of pie. We ate for a few moments, in silence – well, I tried to; it was delicious, but I really didn’t have much of an appetite.
‘When did you do this?’
‘This evening. Before I went to South Kensington and bought that ridiculous bunch of flowers.’
‘It’s not often a man has to keep apologising for buying a woman flowers …’ I smiled, but why had he bought me them? I still didn’t know.
‘No,’ he smiled, ‘it’s not.’
I sipped my hot chocolate. ‘Where did you put all the stuff? The junk?’
‘Some in the house, if I could find a place for it. Some… well… you know there’s that skip across the road…’
Despite my nerves, I burst out laughing. ‘Oh, brilliant.’ And there it was, the Save the Whale poster, pinned at the top of one of the windows.
‘The flowers are in there, too.’
‘Are they?’
‘No, not really. They’re in my sitting room, in a vase. A man should always have nice flowers in his home.’
‘And the smell of baking. You’d have no trouble selling.’
‘I’m not going anywhere.’ He looked all serious again. Very serious. ‘Okay,’ he said, taking a deep breath. ‘This is what I need to say to you. Last night was not a mistake. In fact it was as far from a mistake as there could be. Ever.’
I paused. I had my mug of hot chocolate halfway to my lips. I set it down again.
‘When I said I’d made a mistake, and tried to give you those bloody flowers, I meant it was a mistake that I said the kiss was a mistake, last night… Does that make any kind of sense?’
‘I think so,’ I whispered. God, I hoped so. What was he telling me?
‘So we’re neighbours, so what?’ He looked so intense my heart started beating double-time. ‘It really doesn’t matter. It’s not an obstacle if we don’t see it as one. At least it isn’t to me.’ Will’s brown eyes were locked on mine; I was paralysed. ‘And about Angie,’ he went on. ‘I will never, ever forget her and nor do I want to,’ he said. ‘I loved her. I always will.’
‘Of course you will,’ I stammered. I would never expect that of him – of anyone. How could he forget her? I let him continue. I had never wanted someone to continue more.
‘I was in a bad place for quite a long time. I wasn’t good. But I’m better now,’ he said, looking up at me. ‘I’m so much better. The insomnia’s still there but I think that’s just a bad habit now, more than anything else…’ He laid his fork down on the little table and looked straight at me. ‘And I am ready to move on. Not on a rebound – and no, I haven’t had several of those. I’m very, very choosy, I’ll have you know.’ He raised his eyebrows at me. I raised mine back, as best as I could with my heart thundering against my chest. I picked up my fork and started drumming it lightly on the table. ‘The bottom line is I’m ready for someone else in my life now, and I’ve been ready for some time.’
‘Have you?’
‘Yes. I have. I’ve been ready for about a fortnight.’
‘A fortnight.’ I just dumbly repeated what he’d said. It was all I could do. My blood was pounding, my foot was tapping, the fork was drumming. Thank goodness the sound of the heater was drowning most of it out. Could Sam’s silly forecast have been right? Had there been something written in the stars all along?
Will ran his hand through his hair again. Oh god. I was on the edge of my seat. ‘The thing is…’
I kept tapping. ‘Yes?’
‘The thing is, it wasn’t wrong to kiss you. In fact, nothing has felt so right for a long, long time. If I regret anything, it’s that I stopped kissing you. In fact, I wish I’d been kissing you non-stop, ever since.’ The tapping halted. My fork was frozen, mid-air. ‘The thing is… I’ve been ready to move on since the moment I met you. I knew it when I turned up on your doorstep with the lemon drizzle and you made me carry that ridiculous box.’ I couldn’t help but giggle, although my heart was hammering. ‘I knew it when I saw you stuffing your face with cake–’
‘Oi!’
‘Sorry, enthusiastically consuming cake, late at night. I knew it when I saw you throwing a whale in a skip and passed out on the drive with one shoe off.’
‘Classy,’ I nodded, but inside my heart was doing somersaults and a couple of exalted back flips. And he hadn’t mentioned about me perving at his bum. That was good.
‘I’ve been fighting it ever since but now I want to fight for it. I’m ready for you, Daryl,’ he said, finally. ‘If you’ll have me.’
I dropped my fork with a bit of a clatter. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t say anything at all. Blood was pulsing round my body at a hundred miles an hour. I felt faint. I felt sick. I felt bloody brilliant.
‘Only if you’re interested, of course. And if you’re ready, that is. Would you take a chance on me?’ He looked anxious. His brown eyes were all big and expectant. ‘I like you, Daryl,’ he said. This was the third time this week someone had said that to me, but somehow, I knew, this was the real deal. I really hoped so. I still couldn’t speak. ‘I did the summerhouse, tonight, for you. I hated it, because I thought no one would ever appreciate it again. But I knew you’d love it. Damn it, Daryl! Say something! I’m besotted!’ Besotted. I don’t think anyone had ever said that about me before. Besotted. ‘Stop me from waffling on, please, and answer me one question: would you consider going on a date with me?’
At last, I could speak, although it was more of a squeak, to be honest. ‘I’d have to think about it…’ I said, with a slow, dawning smile.
‘Please don’t think too long.’
I didn’t have to. Sam had been taking the love forecast too literally; I never should have done. I wasn’t going to fall in love by Friday, at all, but I would be ready to take a chance on love. I was ready. I wasn’t scared any more. I whispered my reply.
‘I say yes.’
He stood up. He came round to my side of the table. I stood up as well. He gently put his arms round me and pulled me nearer to him. It felt lovely. I could feel his hands on the small of my back. His face was really quite close to me now. I wanted to take my hand and gently stroke the side of it. I wanted to feel his skin.
‘How would you feel about me kissing you again?’ he murmured.
‘What, now?’ I whispered. I looked at his lips.
His voice was almost inaudible. ‘Yes, now. Although, I have no real idea how you feel about me,’ he said. ‘I said “besotted”, you still haven’t said a lot.’ He was staring at my lips now.
Just kiss me, and I’ll show you how I feel.’
‘I like besotted,’ I murmured. ‘And I like you, too.’ I looked straight into those heavenly brown eyes.
‘In that way?’
‘Yes, in that way,’ I whispered. God, this was amazingly unbearable. I had never felt such anticipation in my life. Was it now? Was he going to kiss me now?
‘Good. As long as you’re sure…’ Yes, yes, come on, Will. Kiss me! Kiss me now. Our faces were really close to each other now. Tantalisingly close. They couldn’t get any closer without touching.
‘Yes, I’m sure, Will. Please just bloody well kiss me!’
He smiled, making my heart melt into a puddle on the floor, and then he leaned forwards and kissed me.
Oh god, his lips were so amazingly warm. And velvety. And soft. I could press mine against them for ever. He started kissing me gently – soft, brief kisses, with the full pressure of his amazing lips. Then slowly, slowly, the soft, brief kisses became longer, probing kisses and we were kissing properly, exploring… It went on for ages… It was so much more sensual than the first time. So sexy… He cupped the side of my face, with his hand, again…I reciprocated by finally placing my hand on the back of his head and tousling his hair a little… Oh, it was heavenly… I could have kissed him all night… and it felt like he didn’t want to stop, either…
Finally, we drew back from each other and I don’t think I’ll ever forget the look on Will’s face and just how delighted he looked. And a little bit horny, I must admit. Which was fine by me, as I felt the same.
‘That was even better than the first time,’ I managed to say.
‘Don’t sound so surprised,’ he said. His voice was an octave lower, rumbly. I knew he was struggling to contain himself and I loved it. ‘I’ve thought of pretty much nothing else since last night. I’ve been practising it in my head all day, just in case we ever got to do it again.’
‘I had no idea.’
‘And I’d like to do a lot more real-life practising, if that’s okay with you. A lot more.’ He came in for another kiss; I was happy to oblige. This time we set a new record.
‘Blimey,’ he said, as we came up for air. He circled his arms round me, nice and tight. ‘So?’ he whispered.
‘So, what are you doing on Bonfire Night?’ he asked. ‘We’ve done Halloween; I think we should have fireworks next’
‘I think fireworks can be arranged,’ I grinned. ‘Let me see, that’s Tuesday, though. I’m not sure I can plan that far ahead.’
‘True,’ he nodded. ‘A lot can happen between now and then.’
I winked at him. He grinned at me. I was about to kiss him again when a yawn suddenly caught in my throat and came out in full glory. How embarrassing. Still, he was used to that. Me being embarrassing. I couldn’t see that ever stopping.
‘Uh-oh,’ he said ‘Someone’s tired. Do you want to take a rain check?’
‘Sorry. Yes. God, sorry. Could whatever it is start tomorrow? I am absolutely shattered.’ The hot chocolate had made me incredibly sleepy and there was something highly soporific about pumpkin pie. Who knew? It had been a really long night, and I also realised that I would really like to have this night, on my own, to hug this deliciousness to me, before I started on my new adventure.
‘That’s fine with me,’ said Will with a big smile. ‘Are you ready to go?’
‘Yes, please. Thank you, Will, for tonight, it was all wonderful. Yes, I’m ready.’
Will opened the door of the summerhouse. It had finally stopped raining. There were just a few raindrops trickling prettily off the door frame. Ducking under them, Will took my hand and led me down the path back across his garden.
‘Look!’ I said, pointing upwards. For the first time in days, the sky was clear, and I could see the stars.
‘Beautiful,’ said Will, and he kissed me again.