Jenn woke the next morning before her alarm, showered, and was on her way to Kate’s before Cole had even thought about waking up. She’d said goodbye to Gwen and Royce last night before bed since they had a late-morning flight to Las Vegas and would be gone by the time Jenn got home. If either of them had found her vibrator in the bedside table, well, hopefully she’d never know about it.
She stopped at the coffee shop on the corner for a cappuccino and bagel for herself. Kate had texted in the middle of the night requesting a chocolate chip muffin, which was so out of character that Jenn considered it proof that no one—not even Katherine Hayes—was immune to pregnancy cravings. She finished her breakfast on the subway, exiting a stop early so that she could cut through Central Park since she was early and the weather was so nice.
She entered the lobby of Kate’s building right at eight, waving at the doorman before she stepped in the elevator. When she got to Kate’s door, she used her key to let herself in, glancing automatically at the security panel. As expected, the system was disabled, which meant Josh had already left for work. “Knock, knock,” Jenn called as she stepped into the foyer.
There was no answer, so she walked into the kitchen to leave the muffin for Kate, and that was when she saw her. Kate was curled on her side on the living room couch, hair over her face, apparently asleep. She wore a thin white robe over blue pajamas, and this was weird. Very weird.
Unease crept up Jenn’s spine. In six years as her assistant, she’d never arrived to find Kate asleep on the couch in her pajamas before. Was she okay? Was this just a pregnancy thing? In her confusion, Jenn knocked over a glass on the kitchen counter, and it dropped into the sink with a crash.
Kate lurched upright on the couch with an odd sort of moan.
“Oh hi, I just—” Jenn cut herself off as Kate slumped forward, arms wrapped around her stomach. Tears streaked her face.
Fear knifed through Jenn’s gut in a swift, cold slash. Numbly, she fumbled for her cell phone as she rushed toward Kate. “What’s wrong? Is it the baby?”
Kate raised her head, staring at Jenn through bleary, bloodshot eyes.
“Kate?” She pressed nine and then one, her finger poised to complete the call.
Kate released a shuddering breath. “Jenn? What are you…?”
Jenn crouched in front of her. “The baby…Kate, is something wrong?”
“What? No!” Kate swiped at her eyes, her hands shaking furiously.
“You look like you’re in pain,” Jenn said, still clutching her cell phone, unsure what the hell was going on.
“The baby’s fine,” Kate whispered, her eyes darting around the room. “I’m fine. I just…”
Jenn cleared her screen and slid the phone into her pocket, then perched herself on the chair opposite Kate. “You just what? You’re scaring me, Kate.”
Kate smoothed her hands over her knees and drew a deep breath. “I just dozed off, that’s all. I lost track of time. I’ll go get ready.”
Jenn put her hand out. “Forget about our meeting. What’s going on, really?” Because she’d known Kate a long time, and she’d seen this kind of haunted look in her eyes before. She knew what had caused it back then, but she had no idea what was causing it now.
Kate pressed a hand over her eyes. “I’m not sleeping well lately, and it’s…” Her breath hitched. “The nightmares are back.” Those last words came out on a breathless whisper.
Jenn felt her chest constrict around her heart. Ah, damn. “Oh, Kate.” She moved to the couch beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Kate shook beneath her fingers.
“It’s stupid, really,” Kate said with a forced smile. “Dreams are more vivid when you’re pregnant. A lot of women even develop nightmares for the first time. I looked it up.”
“Okay. That makes sense, with hormones and everything.”
“Fucking hormones,” Kate muttered, drawing in another shaky breath.
“You need to slow down. You’re running yourself ragged. It’s no good if you’re not sleeping. You could do that to yourself before, but you can’t do it now.”
Kate shook her head. “I can’t. Keeping busy is the only thing that helps.”
“What does Josh say?”
Kate looked down at her hands.
“You haven’t told him.”
“He knows I’m not sleeping well.” Kate looked away, her expression distant. Her face was pale, in sharp contrast with the purple smudges under her eyes.
“Kate…you have to tell him.”
She sighed heavily. “I don’t want to go through this again. I’m too tired. I just keep thinking, if I stay busy enough…”
“It didn’t work before, and it sure as hell isn’t going to work now. Call your husband. Let him help you through this.”
“I don’t want him to worry,” she whispered.
“It’s his job to worry about you. Let him.”
Kate slumped, nodding slightly. “You’re right. I’m being an idiot.”
“You’re being a hormonal pregnant woman,” Jenn said with a laugh. “And if I know Josh at all, he’s already got some inkling of what’s going on.”
“He does.” Tears glittered in Kate’s eyes, and she blinked them back. “He keeps asking, and I keep pushing him away…”
“Okay, you need to go eat the chocolate chip muffin I left on the kitchen counter. It’ll make you feel loads better. I’ll get Josh for you while you eat.”
Kate’s expression hardened. “Not now. He’s teaching.”
“He’s told me over and over to contact him any time if you need something. Go eat your muffin. I’ve got this.”
With a resigned sigh, Kate pushed herself off the couch and walked into the kitchen. She poured a tall glass of water and sat on a barstool in front of the white paper bag Jenn had left there for her.
Jenn pulled out her phone and opened a new text message to Josh. She’s fine. The baby’s fine. But she needs you. Can you skip out of class early?
His reply was almost instantaneous. I’m on my way.
Jenn pulled out her iPad and tapped the screen to life. “He’s on his way now. I’m clearing your schedule for the rest of the day.”
“But we have—”
“Not anymore,” Jenn told her as she pulled up Kate’s itinerary. She dialed the magazine reporter who’d been scheduled to interview Kate at noon, explained that Kate was feeling under the weather, and rescheduled the interview for the following Tuesday. Then she emailed Harry and Vero—Kate’s publicist—and rescheduled the video conference they had scheduled later that afternoon. “Done,” she told Kate, sliding the iPad back into her bag.
Kate gave her a mutinous look. “I’m perfectly capable of handling the rest of my appointments for the day.” And indeed, now that she’d put some food in her belly, the color had returned to her cheeks.
“If I hadn’t done it already, Josh would have insisted on it when he gets here.”
Kate huffed in annoyance, then finished her muffin and washed it down with the glass of water. She put her glass in the sink and walked to the window, looking out over Central Park. Behind them, the door opened, and Josh strode into the room. He walked straight to his wife, pulling her in against his chest, and, to Jenn’s total shock, Kate burst into tears.
Jenn stood from the couch and grabbed her bag. “I’ll just…I’ll check in tomorrow.”
Josh’s arms were wrapped protectively around Kate, and the look on his face could only be described as fierce. He looked over Kate’s head at Jenn. “Thank you,” he murmured.
She nodded, then hurried from the room, letting herself back out into the hall. Her eyes stung, and her chest was tight. She’d rarely seen Kate that vulnerable, especially not lately, but she was in good hands. Josh was an A-plus guy. He’d take care of her.
In the meantime, Jenn suddenly had an open day ahead of her. Not sure where to start, she wandered across the street into Central Park and found a bench in the warm sunshine where she could sit and check her messages. She inhaled a deep breath and released it slowly. Then, because her chest was still tight, she did it again. God, she’d been so scared when she walked in and found Kate curled up like that. If anything happened to the baby…
Jenn exhaled, closing her eyes for a moment to feel the warm kiss of the sun on her face. What a month. Really, it was mind-boggling sometimes how much her life had changed. For the most part, after marrying Cole, she’d still felt single. She’d made plans for herself as she’d always done, because their marriage was nothing but a business agreement. But now that she’d moved into his bedroom? She realized she was fighting the urge to call and tell him what had happened, just to hear the sound of his voice.
“Don’t be an idiot,” she murmured to herself. Cole didn’t tell her what he did all day while she was at work, so she didn’t need to let him know her workday had been canceled, and she sure as hell didn’t need to see him. Nope.
Instead, she texted Farrah and Casey to see if either of them wanted to grab lunch. As it turned out, they both did, and she spent the next ten minutes texting back and forth with them figuring out the details. By the time that was taken care of, a text from Josh popped up.
Can you clear her schedule through Monday?
Consider it done, she replied.
She’d told Kate ages ago that she wouldn’t settle for anything less than a man who looked at her the way that Josh looked at Kate. At the time, she’d meant the way he looked at her like she was the only woman in the room, but now she could amend that to include the way he’d looked this morning, like he would slay any dragon that tried to come between him and his wife.
Not that Jenn needed a dragon slayer. She was perfectly self-sufficient, but she wanted that kind of love and devotion, the kind she’d read about in romance novels. She had enough happily married friends to know it was real.
She pulled out her iPad and spent the next half hour rearranging Kate’s schedule for the next three days, when something caught her eye. After the incident during the Good Morning America rehearsal, Jenn had set up a second alert for her phone, this one set to notify her when her own name popped up in the news. And a new alert had just been received.
Warily, Jenn closed out of her calendar app and clicked on the icon.
“Just who is Colton Nix’s new bride? We’ve got the lowdown,” the article promised, accompanied by a photo of Jenn in the uniform she’d worn at her Catholic high school.
Great. Just wonderful.
Heart in her throat, she clicked on the link.
It’s been about a month now since rocker and notorious ladies’ man Colton Nix tied the knot, but just who did he marry? It’s been reported that his wife, Jennifer MacDonald, is none other than Katherine Hayes’s personal assistant. But we wanted to know more about the new Mrs. Nix, so we did a little poking around in her hometown of Mariemont, Ohio, just outside Cincinnati.
It’s here that Jennifer grew up with her ultraconservative Catholic family. The youngest of five girls, Jennifer is said to have worn a purity ring in high school, symbolizing her pledge to abstain from sex until marriage. Could this explain her whirlwind romance with Colton? Was she eager to shed her virtue with a man known to sleep with a different woman every night of the week? It hardly sounds like a match made in heaven, but then again, who are we to judge?
The article went on with three more paragraphs of nothing but judgment, picking apart every aspect of her life, right up to her work with Kate, even speculating that perhaps she’d started working in the entertainment industry hoping to find a famous man to marry.
Of course, because God forbid a woman should ever want anything for herself. It always had to be about a man. Jenn felt fury creeping up her neck in a hot flush. Yes, she’d had a very sheltered childhood. She hadn’t really come into her own until college, when she’d chosen to leave Ohio behind for the lure of a shiny future in Los Angeles. And she’d never looked back.
Cole was in the studio, fine-tuning riffs for “Right Away,” one of the songs he and Jenn had written together the other night, when he looked up to find her standing in the doorway, a sexy smile on her face.
“Is it five o’clock already?” he asked, motioning for her to come in. He must have completely lost track of time. Happened sometimes when he was in the groove.
She shook her head as she walked toward him. “Only a little past two.”
“You’re home early.” He set the guitar aside and tugged her into his lap.
“Kate’s a little under the weather. I’ve cleared her schedule through Monday.”
“Does that mean you’re off from work until Monday?” he asked, skimming a hand down her back.
“I have a few things to take care of remotely, but…basically, yeah.”
“Feel like joining me?” He gestured toward the keyboard, now a permanent fixture in the studio.
“I’d love to, but first…” She dipped her head and kissed him.
And that was how they ended up spending the next three days in a whirlwind of music and sex. It was pretty close to the best three days of his life. By Sunday afternoon, they had “Right Away” and “Coast to Coast” hammered out and ready to record, once he’d hired musicians and booked time in the recording studio. The combination of his vocals and guitar with her on the piano shouldn’t work, but somehow it did, and it was a new sound for him. Something a bit more laid-back, almost bluesy.
“I’m jamming with Naveen and Tom on Friday. You should join us.”
She smiled softly. “I’d love to watch you guys jam.”
“No, I want you to jam with us.” He reached out and tugged her down onto the beanbag chair beside him.
“I don’t know, Cole…”
“Just come and hang out, see what happens.”
“All right.”
So, on Friday afternoon after she got home from work, they headed over to the studio he’d rented. He’d brought along his favorite Gibson, but the rest of the equipment they needed would be provided by the studio, including a keyboard for Jenn. They were the first to arrive, surveying the room quietly. She traced her fingers over the keyboard, insecurity playing across her features.
“Can’t fuckin’ wait to hear you play with us,” he said, setting down his guitar and turning to scope out the sound system.
“I may do more watching than playing.”
“Know what you need?” he said, walking to the bar along the back wall. “You need a drink to relax you. What’ll it be?”
She gave him another look before perching herself on the stool in front of the keyboard. “Rum and coke.”
“Coming right up.” He fixed her drink and another for himself.
“Cheers.” She lifted the glass to her lips and tipped it back.
“Reminds me a little bit of the night we met,” he said, watching her throat as she swallowed.
“A little bit.” A smile crept onto her face. “But let’s hope we don’t get drunk and do anything nearly as stupid today as we did that night.”
“Let’s hope. But then again, I’m not sure it was all that stupid.”
Jenn sat with her back against the wall, watching as the guys played “King of Manhattan,” one of Cole’s most popular hits. Naveen was on the drums, Tom played bass guitar, and Cole had traded his Gibson for an electric guitar, its sound wailing through the room so loudly that it vibrated in her chest.
He thrust the guitar forward, leaning into the microphone. “I’m the king, the king, the king of Manhattan.”
His biceps bulged beneath the formfitting T-shirt he wore, his jeans hanging dangerously low on his hips. He stalked back and forth in front of the microphone as he sang, looking every inch the rock star, and maybe it was the rum talking, but her panties were wet just watching him. There was an energy, a virility about him when he played that was just…well, it was hot. And mesmerizing. And hot.
So far, they’d run through several of Cole’s past hits to warm up. Both the guys had played with him before, and so, after a few hits and misses, they seemed to find their groove together fairly easily. When the song ended, Cole swiped a hand through his hair and turned to look at her, a wide grin on his face. “How did we sound?”
“Phenomenal,” she answered without hesitation.
“You ready to join us?”
“My keyboard would sound ridiculous on that song.”
“So let’s play something new. I’d love to hear the whole band on ‘Right Away.’”
“Oh, I—” Her mouth had gone dry. The idea of playing something she and Cole had written together in front of these guys? It felt a lot like taking her clothes off in front of them. And yes, she knew it would have to happen sooner or later if she was going to make a real go of it as a songwriter. But right now, at this exact moment, it was terrifying.
“Is that one of the songs you guys wrote together?” Naveen asked.
“Sure is.” Cole’s voice was full of all the confidence she lacked.
“All right. You guys play it through once, and then we’ll join in and feel our way through,” Tom said, setting his bass on its stand.
“Ready, babe?” Cole asked, giving her another big smile.
She chugged the rest of her drink and sat at the keyboard.
Cole swapped out the electric guitar for his Gibson, the one he’d played for all their songwriting sessions at home. Seeing it in his arms brought a sense of calm over her. She could do this. He strummed the first chord and gave her a nod.
She situated her fingers over the keys and began to play. It was a simple tune, more of a background melody to support his guitar and vocals. Cole joined her, his voice deep and raspy as he crooned the lyrics she’d written with him. She kept her eyes on the keyboard, blocking out the fact that there were two other men in the room, professional musicians watching and listening, forming their first opinions of her as a songwriter.
When they’d finished, Naveen and Tom both clapped.
“Yo, that’s not bad. A new sound for you. I like it,” Tom said, lifting his bass guitar to sling the strap over his shoulders.
“I think it needs a slow build,” Naveen said, his expression thoughtful. “Like, what if Jenn plays that opening bar twice, first on her own, and then you join in on the acoustic guitar. Tom and I come in on the chorus to bring it up.”
“I like that,” Cole said, nodding vigorously. “Yeah.”
“I do too,” Jenn agreed. “Let’s try it.”
She inhaled and blew out a long, slow breath, hyperaware that every eye in the room was fixed on her. She played the opening bar of “Right Away” on her own, the digitized piano music the only sound in the studio, and then, without pause, she played it again. This time, Cole joined her on the guitar, and as they reached the end of the bar, he began to sing.
She kept playing, keeping her full attention on the music so she didn’t screw up. Because she was no piano prodigy, after all. She played well enough to entertain guests who’d visited the house when she was growing up, and it had allowed her to sound out melodies while she wrote, since she wasn’t much of a singer. But now, she was feeling the pressure to perform, big-time.
They reached the chorus, and Naveen began to tap out a rhythm on the drums, simple and straightforward as he got the feel of the song, and yet…it changed everything. Tom added in a few rhythmic notes on the bass, rounding out the sound, and goose bumps rose up and down her arms. She wanted to close her eyes and absorb the moment, but she couldn’t because she might lose her place. So she kept her eyes on the keys, playing, listening, marveling in the wonder of this song she and Cole had written at home now being played by a full band.
If she’d had any doubts about her career aspirations, they were gone now. This was what she wanted. This was absolutely amazing. Thrilling. Everything she’d hoped for and then some. Her fingers slipped off the keys, and again every eye in the room was on her.
“Sorry,” she mumbled, scrambling to recover and find her spot, but the song had gone on without her, so she just sat back and watched. Listened. She let it awe and inspire her for every difficult, intimidating moment to come. These little moments were what it was all about, and watching these guys perform a song she’d helped write was her ultimate dream come true. She’d never envisioned herself as part of the music. Her dream had always been to remain on the sidelines, until Cole had pushed her for more.
“Okay?” he asked when they’d finished.
“So much better than okay,” she said, her voice breathless. “That was amazing.”
“We lost you halfway through,” Tom said, sounding amused. “Thought maybe you didn’t like the way we were heading.”
She shook her head. “The opposite of that. I lost my place, and then I just got lost listening to you guys. It was…magic.”
“Told you guys she was a musician at heart,” Cole said, such pride in his voice that she felt her whole body grow warm and tingly beneath his stare.
They played the song again, and again, stopping and starting as they tried out various sounds. Tom made a few suggestions for her piano music that added a whole new zing to the chorus. Naveen had a great ear too, constantly jumping in with ideas and suggestions. Each of them jotted down their own music as they worked, scratching out lines and tweaking them as they perfected the song. By the end of the night, “Right Away” sounded like a real song, the kind of thing she could imagine hearing on the radio. They recorded the final version, and Cole sent the digital file to each of them so that they could refresh themselves on it between sessions.
Listening to the digital playback made the goose bumps rise on her arms again. They sounded good. Cole sounded smooth and sexy, and the knowledge that those piano notes in the background were hers? It did funny things to the pit of her stomach.
“I think we should add this one to the lineup at Styx and Stones next month,” Cole said as they were packing up.
“Agreed,” Naveen said.
Cole looked her straight in the eye. “And I think you should play with us.”