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Emma
After a long morning of Monday classes I was happy to have the afternoon off. I went home and took the opportunity to work on my history paper in silence. I set up at our dining room table, flipping open Zach’s MacBook and getting to work. I farted around on social media first. My Facebook account had a whole thirty-two friends, mostly people I’d met in the last year. My Twitter account was more the same, but I used that mainly to see what was going on in the world. Other than that, I had nothing else. No Instagram, no Snapchat, nothing.
Next I checked my email. Nothing of interest except an email from Dad that he forwarded to me.
To: Paul Andrews
From: Meredith Irvine
Date: October 20th, 2015
Hi Paul,
I wanted to send you a short note thanking you for trying to reach out to Emma for me. I haven’t heard from her so I can only assume she doesn’t want to speak to me, and I don’t blame her a bit. I do hope that you can forward this email on to her to let her know that I think about her all the time, I miss having her in my life, I regret everything that’s happened in the past and that if she can ever find it in her heart to call, or even send a short email or text, I would be over the moon!
Emma, sweetie, I know you probably hate me and I know I’ve squandered so many years, but I’m a firm believer that it’s never too late to connect. Even if it’s only once, I want to know that you’re healthy and happy. I know your dad’s done an amazing job raising you into the beautiful girl you’ve become.
And even if you don’t want to reach out, that’s okay. If any time in the future you want to call or write, I’m always there for you. I love you.
Mom
Mom? She had the audacity to sign it Mom? Meredith had never been a mother to me. Sure, she sent the odd birthday and Christmas cards, but that didn’t qualify her to be a mother, at least not to me. My finger hovered over the delete button, but I stopped myself. Maybe I would reply, but it wasn’t anything Meredith wanted to hear. And Dad? How could he send this to me? Why was he on her side? I was still stewing when Zach got home. I showed him the email.
He opened his mouth to say something then stopped. A dull groan marinated in his throat. “Em, I have a feeling that you don’t want to hear my opinion, so I think I’ll keep quiet.”
I clenched my jaw. “Really? You’re on Team Meredith too?”
He sighed. “No, I’m always on your team, but as an outsider looking in, she seems sincere. You don’t have to contact her, but you shouldn’t be pissed about it either. Aren’t you a little curious?”
“No. And I find her timing suspect. I haven’t heard from her in years and all of a sudden I’m dating Zach Walker, and Mom comes around. She wants something.”
“I guess you won’t know unless you contact her.”
I narrowed my eyes. “You did not just try to manipulate and outsmart me, did you?”
“Kind of?” A smile crept up on his lips and I couldn’t help but smile back.
“You’re a shit.”
“A shit who loves you.”
I put my arms around me. “Let’s forget about her and my history paper. I want to spend the rest of the evening with my handsome boyfriend.”
A mischievous grin spread across his face. “Now that’s what I like to hear.”
#
I HAD A FEW HOURS BETWEEN classes every Thursday so I retreated to the small library in the St. John’s building where I could have some study time. I’d found a little nook the previous year and enjoyed the peace and quiet of this less popular library. I was half an hour into my Civil War research paper when I heard a voice I knew all too well talking nearby. My first instinct was to cringe, then cower a bit, but slowly I lifted my gaze and there she was. Damn Bianca Smythe. She was with a guy and they spoke in low voices, unaware of me sitting ten feet behind them. I sank behind my book, making out the odd word here and there. They were study partners of some sort because he wasn’t the type of guy Bianca would date. For starters, he was shorter than her, and while I thought he was cute enough, he wouldn’t pass Bianca’s high standards and his clothes were too nerdy for her tastes.
I peeked around my textbook and looked at the door. It was too far for me to easily slip out. I’d get her attention so my best course of action was to wait it out and hope I remained invisible.
“Un-fucking-believable. You?”
So much for that idea. I lowered my book and she was staring at me, her aquamarine blue eyes launching a thousand daggers.
“Hi.” No need for me to be a bitch.
“This university is huge, and I’ve already crossed paths with you?”
The guy slunk off to the next section of books leaving me alone with Bianca. I was hoping she’d follow suit, but instead she moved in closer, closing the gap between us. I thought to stand, to make it a level playing field, but my legs wouldn’t move and I remained in my defenseless position.
“I study here all the time.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ll have to remember that. It’s like whatever I do, there you are.”
I pressed my lips together, wishing I could think of just one witty retort, but I remained silent. She rolled her eyes again and huffed. “Pathetic and still weird.”
My blood boiled. “And you’re still a bitch.”
Her eyes fired laser beams at me and she leaned in, narrowing the gap to less than a foot. “I would do anything to get you out of my life. Haven’t you already taken everything from me?” Her face flushed, the only time I’d ever seen her show any weakness, although the vitriol in her voice showed no sign of letting up.
“You have nerve. You and your she-goons put me in the hospital and I’ve taken everything from you? You’re delusional.” There, I’d found my backbone.
“You think I haven’t paid for that?”
“Why? Because Jake dumped you? Like you weren’t going to dump him the second some hot rich guy came along.”
In an instant life seemed to drain from her face. “I loved Jake. He was the only guy who ever respected me, who loved me, so no, you twit, I wasn’t waiting for some other guy to come along.”
“You loved him so much you needed to rough me up a bit? Who’s the idiot?”
A librarian came from around a corner and marched to us. “Ladies, I’ve received a complaint about the noise. I’m going to ask you to take your conversation outside.”
Thinking Bianca would take the hint and leave, she just stood there, waiting for me to get up and follow her. A part of me wanted the confrontation, but the other part of me wanted to be done with her. With the librarian waiting, I gathered up my books and followed Bianca outside. The warm sun hit me in the face, blinding me for second. I hadn’t been outside in hours and my eyes took a moment to adjust. It would have been a perfect moment for her to punch me. She liked to hit me when I was vulnerable.
“You have everything now,” Bianca said, continuing her assault. “You have Zach and his friends. You have his pull. You have my fucking life!”
“No, I don’t,” I said, shielding my eyes from the sunshine. “And what makes you think I’d want your life?”
“You went up to Brett’s cabin. I know you were there.”
“So what? I went once.”
“I’m not even invited to parties anymore. You know why? Because of you!”
“What parties? I don’t go to them.”
“You don’t have to. King Zach proclaimed me untouchable, like I’m some fucking leper. Enjoy it while it lasts because eventually he’ll get bored of you. At least until some hot rich girl comes along.”
She stormed off. For a second I stood there dumbfounded, but then I sprang into action, running down the path after her. “What are you talking about? Zach doesn’t go to these parties. Why would he care if you were there?”
She kept walking, picking up her pace but I kept up with her. I wanted her to stop, to finish this conversation, but she refused. Finally, I grabbed onto her arm, whirling her around. Her face was now blotchy, her eyes full with tears threatening to fall. This girl, who’d tormented me for half a year, who humiliated me in front of my coworkers, who’d beaten me up and cracked my ribs, who’d never shown an emotion other than revulsion, was now teary-eyed and ready to sob. I took a step back from her, overcome by this fissure in her Iron Curtain.
“I didn’t mean to upset you,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Everything about you upsets me.” She spat it out, but her venom was waning.
“What’s going on? If Zach is doing something, I want to know.”
She wiped her eyes and let out a cackle. “Sure you do. Next thing I know, the two of you will have cooked up more shit to hit me with.”
“No, we won’t. Tell me what Zach did?”
“You mean already did! Are you that dense? He’s told everyone to stay away from me. Not invite me to parties, to get me thrown out of my sorority. I’ve lost most of my friends, all because of you. You must be some firecracker in bed, because no chick has ever had Zach so firmly by the balls.”
“He wouldn’t do this,” I said, shaking my head. “He promised me this was over.”
She grunted. “Zach threatened me. Did he tell you that?”
I searched her face, trying to find something of the old Bianca, something I could latch on to, but there was nothing. I wanted to hate her, but her words had a ring of some kind of truth to them, and they were scaring the shit out of me. “When did he do this and why?”
“After you were beaten up. He showed up after one of my classes . . .” Bianca stopped. “You may think you know Zach Walker. Right now he’s showing you his good side, but he can’t hide it forever. If I were you, I’d dump his sorry ass. And do me a favor. Don’t even tell him we talked. I don’t need him to ruin what’s left of my life.”
“Wait, I have more questions,” I said as she started walking.
“I’ve got class. Besides, we’ve got nothing more to say. I’ll stay away from you and you stay away from me.”