SINCE RETURNING HOME FROM China and India with Will and Zoey, our hearts are full. Every day we see them grow and change, and in them we see boundless enthusiasm. In a lot of ways, they remind us of us and exemplify the lesson we learned from our parents—there is nothing we can’t achieve.
So much has changed in just two short years. Zoey started off with us as a very frightened little girl. She was failing to thrive in her environment. Now, she is happy, bright-eyed, and well-adjusted. She is growing both in size and in character. Her personality is starting to shine through the shell she had developed out of necessity during her first two years of life in the orphanage. She has always been the quiet observer in the room. She soaks it all in, but don’t let her silence fool you, she is paying close attention to everything. At three, she is making great strides to make up for lost time.
Will has always been pretty well-behaved. While no child is perfectly mannered, Will is the kind of boy who says “please” and “thank you” without being prompted. He is considerate of others and has an emotional IQ far beyond his age. He loves being around people, young and old. Most recently, during a parent-teacher school night, Will introduced me to each of his classmates by name. I didn’t see any of the other twenty-eight students doing the same. There is just something about him that goes beyond average. His heart is gigantic. He cares for his sister in ways only an older brother can understand. If he has a cookie, she gets half. If she is scared, he holds her tight. For a boy of four, he continues to impress.
Both kids are now in preschool. They are making huge strides developmentally, leaving the past behind them and happily accelerating into their brighter future. We are both very proud of them.
Since both Will and Zoey were diagnosed with achondroplasia, the likelihood they will require corrective surgery similar to the kind Jen and I had is slim, fortunately. Of course, there is a chance surgery will be in their future. And if that day comes, we will be there for them, watchful and worried, as our parents were for us.
In terms of our recent medical issues, the last couple of years have been challenging to us both. Jen’s battle with cancer was downright scary. And while the doctors seemed confident it was always beatable, we are so very thankful it worked out that way. For Bill, his surgeries in November 2008 for the right hip and January 2009 for the left were far overdue. Since his time on crutches in high school, Bill had been walking around on a dislocated and partially dislocated hip. His pain was reduced dramatically and his happiness increased by a similar measure with the surgery. In 2014, he required surgical repair for a vertebral disc he had herniated while at the gym back in late 2012. That surgery took place at the Hospital for Special Surgery in New York, only nine months after Jen completed her chemotherapy.
Bill’s decision to delay his back surgery until things at home had quieted down had him enduring significant pain for months on end. The back surgery was actually scarier than the skeletal surgeries of our childhood. There was always the risk that things could end up worse than before the surgery, and there was so much at stake. Recovery was a lot more difficult than we had anticipated and progress was slow, made harder by the fact that we have two energetic young children at home who love to be active with us.
Bill is really not supposed to do any lifting, which is both frustrating and disappointing, as one of the best parts of being a parent to young children is lifting them up and snuggling with them. Things are getting better, though. Bill has recently been cleared to start physical therapy, which means he will gain more strength with every day. Jen, being cancer free, is also getting physically stronger and able to do much more.
Going through these difficult times together has made us both realize just how much we were meant to be together. Bill has said that he doesn’t know if he would have done so well during and after his surgery if he hadn’t had Jen, and Jen is thankful for the incredible support that Bill has shown her.
The truth of the matter is we are very grateful for every part of who we are, what we are, and how we were raised. We continue to seek inspiration from others whose stories of triumph over adversity help give us the strength to rise to the many challenges we face every day. In our younger years, we had to prove to everyone else that size didn’t matter. Now, we only need to convince two people of that.
We wouldn’t change anything about our lives, not one thing. Had either of us not been born with skeletal dysplasia, we probably would have never met. It was in the stars that we be together, and from the moment we fell in love, our blessings have multiplied beyond our dreams. Thank you everyone for embracing us just the way we are.
As we enter the latest chapter of our lives—being parents—we put all our energy into being a family unit and enjoying every minute we can spend together. We make every effort to look out for the best interests of our two amazing children, as do all parents. We both believe that Will and Zoey have had a remarkable few short years on this planet, but that the most exciting part of their story has yet to be written.
Our lives have been a fantastic journey thus far. So much has happened in such a short period of time. Just eight years ago, we were single, living in different parts of the country, and didn’t know what we wanted out of life. Fast-forward to today, and the most amazing turn of events has occurred. We are parents of the two most amazing children in the world. Uncertainty and joy, which no doubt lie ahead, make life exciting. There are challenges we will need to meet in our future, some that we know about, and some beyond the unexpected vistas of possibility. We are learning so much about life by being parents.
We are figuring out life as we go, appreciative of all it brings—from the wondrous joy of a new day to the rocky mountain that may stand in our path. Life is short, so enjoy every moment!