Lulu ordered an Uber just after eleven o’clock and a grey Skoda arrived within ten minutes. ‘Can you remember what life was like before Uber?’ asked Jane. ‘Frantically ringing minicab companies, only to be told there was no one available?’
‘Smartphones have changed our lives so much,’ said Jeremy. ‘A gift and a curse.’
‘I feel the same way,’ said Lulu. ‘I was saying to Conrad, the smartphone has made narrowboating so much easier, with GPS showing exactly where you are and where the nearest facilities are.’
Jeremy frowned. ‘You were talking to Conrad? Your cat?’
Lulu laughed. ‘I talk to him all the time. As I said, he’s my constant companion. I tell him everything, pretty much. Anyway, the downside of smartphones is that you can always be contacted. You’re never out of range.’
‘You can always switch it off,’ said Jane.
‘Do you?’
Jane laughed. ‘Of course not. Who does?’
‘And don’t get me started on social media,’ said Lulu. ‘Even when I was a police officer, the amount of work generated by social media was soul destroying. And it’s gone from bad to worse.’
‘Yes, but it’s swings and roundabouts, isn’t it?’ said Jeremy. ‘Social media has raised the police’s workload, but at the same time smartphones have made the police’s work so much easier, surely. You can track where the criminals are, what they’re saying to each other, who they’re talking to. I heard that you can use phones as bugs, too, and listen in even when a call isn’t being made.’
‘Is that true?’ asked Jane.
‘I think it’s technically possible, but I’ve never heard of the police being allowed to use it. MI5, maybe.’
‘It’s a whole new world,’ said Jane.
Lulu stood up and hugged Jane. ‘It’s been delightful, really. Thank you so much.’ She looked over at Jeremy. ‘It’s been a real pleasure meeting you, Jeremy. And thank you so much for a wonderful meal.’
Jeremy held her hands and kissed her on both cheeks. ‘It was great to meet you, too. I’m sure we’ll meet again. At the wedding, I hope.’
‘He’s not going to give up,’ said Jane.
‘Damn right I’m not,’ he said. ‘I’m in for the long haul.’
Lulu bent down, scooped up Conrad and put him on her shoulders.
‘And it was a pleasure meeting you, Conrad,’ said Jeremy. ‘And I won’t hold it against you that you turned up your nose at my lamb tagine.’
‘Let me see you to your taxi,’ said Jane, and she took Lulu down the hall to the front door. ‘Thank you so much for coming,’ she said.
‘I had a lovely time,’ replied Lulu.
They walked out of the house and along the driveway. The Uber was waiting for them on the road. ‘So what do you think?’ asked Jane, linking her arm through Lulu’s. ‘Does he have your seal of approval?’
‘He’s lovely,’ said Lulu.
‘His offer of a prenup took me by surprise.’
‘I think he realized that you were worried about the money thing.’
‘But it’s good, right?’
‘I guess so,’ said Lulu. ‘But let me sleep on it. I’ll phone you tomorrow.’
‘Please do, yes. And thank you again for coming.’ They hugged and Jane headed back to the house. Lulu took her phone out of her handbag and snapped a photograph of the number plate of the Audi.
‘He’s watching you from an upstairs window,’ whispered Conrad.
Lulu turned her back to the house. ‘Did he see me take the photograph?’
‘I’m not sure.’
Lulu slid the phone back into her handbag. ‘Fingers crossed,’ she said.
‘Cats can’t cross their fingers,’ said Conrad.
‘What do you do for luck?’
‘We try to avoid walking under ladders. And cracking mirrors.’
‘Good to know.’
The Uber driver was called Ahmad and he had the disconcerting habit of constantly looking over his shoulder to talk to them as he drove. Lulu listened and nodded politely, though several times she felt the urge to shout at him to keep his eyes on the road.
‘Ahmad, five stars if you please,’ he said as they climbed out of his car.
‘Definitely,’ she said, though she had already decided not to give him a review. She never liked giving bad ratings to Uber drivers because she knew it could affect their livelihood, but travelling with Ahmad hadn’t been a pleasant experience, so best just to say nothing. She closed the door and scooped Conrad up onto her shoulders.
She walked along the towpath towards the Staffordshire arm. There were more than a dozen narrowboats moored there now, with only a few spaces left. Two young women in jeans and pullovers were sitting on their boat, sharing what was clearly a cannabis joint. Their boat was painted a deep green and they had called it Reefer Madness, the name printed in gold capital letters above a painting of a marijuana leaf. They waved at Lulu and she smiled back.
‘We love your cat!’ one of them shouted.
‘Thank you!’ replied Lulu.
A young man was sitting on the rear deck of the next boat, playing a flute. He was good and Lulu stopped to listen. She actually recognized the tune: it was the second movement of Mozart’s Flute Concerto no. 2. The man seemed oblivious to the fact that he had an audience, and played with his eyes half closed. It was only when he finished and put down the flute that he noticed Lulu and Conrad. He smiled and wished them a good evening. ‘That was lovely,’ said Lulu. Conrad meowed. ‘Conrad enjoyed it too,’ said Lulu.
‘Cats love the flute; they can hear frequencies that we humans can’t,’ said the man. ‘They must hear a very different tune to the one we hear.’
‘I’d never thought of that before,’ said Lulu. She smiled at the man and walked on to The Lark. She stepped carefully onto the rear deck, unlocked the doors and went down into the cabin. Conrad jumped onto the sofa and Lulu put the kettle on before pouring some Evian water in a bowl for him. She put the bowl down in front of him and he thanked her.
‘You haven’t said anything about Jeremy,’ said Lulu.
Conrad lapped at the water, then sat down and wiped his whiskers. ‘I was waiting for you to ask.’
‘That sounds ominous.’
Conrad tilted his head on one side and stared at her with his unblinking green eyes. ‘His aura was confusing.’
‘Really? Confusing?’
Conrad nodded. ‘There was a strange energy to it. There was lots of dark, dirty, avocado green.’
‘Didn’t you once tell me that a green aura meant the person was starting a journey, a meaningful journey or a healing journey?’
‘That’s light green. And vibrant. Jeremy’s was dirtier and much darker. Like I said, the dull green of an avocado. And that is the energy of deceit. People who are being honest and truthful radiate a deep blue aura, topped by a white crown of energy. I didn’t see any of that in his aura, I’m afraid.’
‘So Jeremy was lying?’
‘Maybe not lying, but certainly embellishing the truth.’
‘Well, the Irish are said to be great storytellers.’
‘The more he spoke, the dark green energy got stronger and was absorbed by Jane’s aura. She was accepting his lies. I could see it happening.’
‘That’s not good,’ said Lulu.
‘No, it isn’t. He had a lot of magenta, too. That’s what you see with people who put their own needs above everyone else’s. They don’t need validation from anybody but themselves.’
‘That sounds like a sociopath.’
‘Well, yes, maybe. But he is charming.’
‘Oh, he is definitely that. He could charm the birds from the trees.’
‘Now that is a skill I could do with,’ said Conrad.
‘But other than the aura, what did you think?’
‘I thought he was a bit smarmy. A bit full of himself. Sometimes it felt as if he was talking down to you and Jane. But he tells such good stories, doesn’t he?’
‘He does, yes. Though sometimes it was like we were watching a performance. As if he was playing a part.’
‘Yes, he’d obviously told those stories before.’
‘So what should I tell Jane?’
‘Do you have to tell her anything?’
‘She wants my advice.’
‘She has to make her own decisions in life, surely?’
Lulu nodded. ‘That’s true. But sometimes it’s difficult to see the wood for the trees. Sometimes you need to see a situation from a different perspective.’ She sighed. ‘I’ve no idea what to say to her, frankly.’
‘Because you liked him, too?’
Lulu laughed. ‘Yes, I did.’