Chapter Twenty-Two

IT WAS nearly six months since Richard had been released from his community service of eighty days and eight months since Maya’s death and he was glad of that... not the death of Maya, but time heals all wounds, or so he had heard often enough and of that he was content and also the fact that he didn’t have to wear that awful tag on his ankle any more. That was indeed a penance. He felt dirty when he was wearing it and even when he went for a bath, the damned thing was still attached to him and he could do nothing about it. Fiona had been very kind during that time and explained everything to him that he failed to understand. He had never heard of an ectopic pregnancy before and any use the placenta had on a pregnant woman, was double Dutch to him. It was only when Fiona explained the function of this thing and how it had burst, that he understood the reason for Maya’s untimely death, nevertheless he felt guilty about the Will... as he considered everything should have gone to Fiona. Richard hadn’t expected anything, but Maya had left her entire estate to Fiona and himself, unreservedly. It was so unusual to have money of such magnitude to him and he decided the best way to use it was to open a school for violinists and he would try to get admission to the Royal College of Music to get his degree in teaching. The school would be dedicated to Maya. It would bear her name. It was to be his dream... The Maya Thompson School of music.

This was a dream that haunted him and Fiona was only sad that she didn’t have any part in it, but when Richard visited Maya’s flat in Muswell Hill with Fiona, to dispose of anything that they thought necessary, he had a shock that he hadn’t anticipated.

Fiona approached him only after they had been in the flat for a few minutes.

“I suppose you had better check the bedroom... and I’ll take the lounge,” she said. “There is more of your stuff in there, I should imagine,” she said, thinking of the bundle of letters she had seen there not so long ago, in the chest of drawers, but she did not want to draw Richard’s attention directly to that, as he would then know that she had seen them.

Richard moved slowly towards the bedroom and Fiona watched him as he went. He looked at everything except the chest of drawers and she wondered if he already knew of the letters and where Maya had stacked them. Perhaps he thought she had burned them as he had so often told her she should, but within a short time, he leaned on the offending cabinet and sighed heavily as he studied the bed.

“I don’t know what I should be looking for in here, Fiona,” he called out. “I have a few shirts and things in the wardrobe, but most of the stuff there is Maya’s and could probably go to some charity or other, what do you think?”

“Yes, I guess you might be right, but have a good look around in case there is something there that you might want to keep yourself... Some keepsake, for example. Have you looked in the drawers?”

Richard moved his arm from where he had been resting on the chest of drawers and looked at the furniture with disinterest, before he opened the top drawer and rummaged around to see if there was anything he might want. It was only when he opened the second drawer that his eyes lit up. He recognised the writing on the envelope as he looked quickly into the lounge to see if Fiona had noticed what he had found, but she had disappeared from sight and he gathered she had gone into the bathroom. He stuffed the letters into the pocket of his coat and opened each of the other drawers in turn, but apart from some underwear, both his and Maya’s... there was nothing further that would interest him.

“Are you there, Fiona?” he called out and she answered him from the bathroom.

“Yes... Just having a look at some of mother’s perfumes. She certainly had some taste there I can see... nothing that I could afford anyway. Would you mind if I took a few of these, Richard?”

Richard yawned and hoped that Fiona hadn’t thought he had found anything of great interest as he assured her that she should take what she wanted from the bathroom and that he was pleased that she should do so, but as he did so, something came to his mind and he returned once more to the chest of drawers. It was something that he had remembered seeing just beside the envelope with the letters, but it hadn’t seemed to be of any importance at first, until he thought again. It was a small notebook, like a diary with a leather cover and it had Maya’s name on the front cover in gold letters. Richard studied it carefully, wondering if he should dare look into the notebook as it definitely was not his, but his curiosity got the better of him and he stuffed it into his pocket with his first find. After about an hour, he and Fiona left the flat, having decided what was to go to charity and what could be thrown out as rubbish. All that had to be done then was to sell the flat... and less than two months later that was done and Richard stayed on with Fiona in her flat until he could find a studio to teach his violin, or to wait to find if he was to be admitted at the Royal College of Music.

Fiona put the key in her flat door and raised her eyebrows as if she had anticipated some great surprise.

“Are you happy about this decision, Richard?” she asked and turned towards her friend to get his response, but as always with Richard he was silent for a few moments before he answered and what surprised Fiona more than the ‘waiting period’ was the total loss of his stammer again as he spoke so clearly to her.

“Do you mean my staying at your flat for the time being?” he asked and she nodded enthusiastically. As far as Fiona was concerned, Richard could stay at her flat as long as he liked... and she wished, he would notice her a little more in that time of his stay.

“Yes, I would appreciate your kindness, if I may,” he said and assured her that it would only be until he was able to move out to his own place and that he would only stay if she allowed him to pay his way, which before he had inherited Maya’s money, he was unable to do, but Fiona waved the money question aside and told him he was welcome to stay at her flat for as long as he wanted, but in her heart, she wished he would just stay with her... without any mention of time.

“I’m making tea now. Do you want something?” she asked, but Richard was anxious to have some time on his own to study his letters from Maya’s flat and also to investigate a little further into her monographic diary... He declined Fiona’s offer, telling her that he intended to go out later and then he would find some little cafe or other where he would get a bite to eat. Fiona shrugged her shoulders and accepted the rebuff, but earnestly wishing he would spend the evening with her.

Later when Richard was alone in his room, he opened the envelope containing the letters; letters that he had written and which caused him more grief now than it did joy when he wrote them, not so long ago,

My dearest darling... He screwed the letter up and threw it into the waste bin by the side of his bed, before taking out a second one. My dearest and most tender love... Richard dried his eyes as he turned to the second page of the letter ignoring what he had written at the beginning. “It is always a joy and a pleasure for me to be with you. I count the moments when we are apart and wish time would stop when I am by your side. The letter ended with many kisses and an unusual word, which looked as if it had been a misspelling and that only he and Maya knew. It was something they knew well and understood and they hoped that no one else would invade their privacy. Richard sighed and a little smile crossed his lips as he shoved the letter into his pocket. He remembered well the moment he had written that letter to Maya. That was the day he had tried on her knickers and made her laugh. He knew he looked ridiculous. The damn things would only allow for one of his legs and nothing more, but it was on a day when Maya was particularly low about something and he had tried to cheer her up. The bra didn’t fit either...