One week to go
Madelaine stared out to sea, her favourite past-time these days. Over the years she had tried desperately not take any of this for granted, so staring out to sea without really seeing anything was not doing it justice.
A place like this could not be taken for granted. Too many things could tip the balance and any number of those things could see her shipped off for parts unknown, so she had to fully appreciate every minute.
She sighed. So Liam wanted to celebrate the wedding with a few friends. No point getting her knickers in a twist about it. Besides, she didn’t really want to stop any celebrations…they weren’t people she knew, so they would be here for Troy, and for Liam. That was okay by her.
She focused on the grey-blue ocean, a sou’westerly licking up a few white caps. A pod of dolphins played on the waves, clearly delighted in some action on the surface of the water. Overhead, white-bellied sea eagles hovered high on a thermal, watchful for a fish to leave itself vulnerable.
A few kangaroos had come out to graze on the hill opposite, waiting for dusk to settle in before sunset.
Madelaine looked down at her hands on the spotless stainless steel bench, and her knives neatly set alongside a well worn timber chopping board. She glanced around at the kitchen’s shelves and sinks, at the cool-rooms then back at the view framed by the long windows.
No. She didn’t take any of this for granted. This was her life. This was what she had worked for, and was still working for.
Liam had written her a contract stating that nothing of hers was in any way compromised by the marriage to Troy; that none of her property was at risk. That her home here at Secluded would remain hers for as long as she wished, and in her name only. It would not become part of any joint property. In fact, there was to be no joint property whatsoever.
It almost seemed as if a pre-nup had been written for Troy to agree to, not the other way around.
Her contract was water-tight. Mike Hennessey had assured her of that.
She should have been happy with that.
Well, she was. She was happy with that.
She was happy that she agreed to marry Troy so he could inherit Petny’s millions before the looming deadline.
She was happy it made Liam happy.
She was happy that by marrying Troy she had secured her business for the foreseeable future and beyond. It was a water-tight plan, and everything was win-win.
She just wasn’t happy being married before she had fallen in love with the man who would be her husband.
She wasn’t happy knowing that her feelings had already begun to deepen for Troy, that she took delight in his quirky humour, in those wonderful eyes when he talked to her, in the warmth of his body as he stood close at the kitchen bench, or at the tailgate packing the vehicle for deliveries, or when he hesitated just before he said ‘goodnight’.
Because knowing she was falling for him, and being married to him before she could explore that and savour it and respect it meant that her journey of discovery was being circumvented by things now beyond her control.
She’d consented to marry to help Troy, to help Liam help Troy.
Her mother thought it was wonderful. “You two are really lovely together so who knows, it might work.”
She didn’t want this to be a foregone conclusion. What if he didn’t feel the same way about it? What if he did? Would being married before she had a chance to fall in love take away that delicious anticipation when two people are getting to know each other, not knowing if they would marry, or even if that would be something they’d discuss? What about all the other things they needed to explore beforehand?
Madelaine deliberately shook her head. All too fuzzy. All these thoughts flashing through her head were going too fast to catch.
Start again, Madelaine.
One. She was being married to a person she thought she could fall in love with.
Two. She probably was well on the way to falling in love.
Three. Would being married before they’d each declared themselves a real couple—Hang on, Madds. What was a real couple if not a married couple?—set up weird perimeters and awkward moments and expectations that would lead to disaster?
Four. No one says ‘declared’ anymore unless they’re playing cricket.
Five. Expectations. She didn’t want to go there…to sleep with Troy just because being married made it, sort of, like the ‘thing’ you do when you’re married.
Huh?
She wasn’t happy about being married to the man she had almost fallen in love with. She wanted to fall in love with him first—if she was going to.
Six. Okay. She was going to. But she hadn’t yet.
Seven. OK, maybe she had.
Eight. Definitely had.
But all that meant she had to keep those emotions in check. In fact, checked altogether.
Else she’d be married and might end up having herself a broken heart.
She glanced at the clock behind her. Six in the evening.
A respectable time, for sure.
She walked to the cool room, reached in and grabbed an open bottle of sauvignon blanc.
Back at the prep bench, she poured herself a glass. Nothing like a glass of wine.
And now to fire up the iPod.