I’ve never had the knack of just letting go of something puzzling me. Rie knew this. So it would have been no surprise to her, had she known, that I took it upon myself to make a circuit of the nunnery walls from the outside. All I had to do was go out the main gate, walk back to the small outside gate which marked the northernmost point of Yahiko-ji, and walk the boundary, all the way to where the nunnery compound ended and the main temple compound began, just short of the ravine.
This did not teach me anything I did not already know from my examination of the inside wall, but at least I was able to eliminate the idea of a discarded scaling ladder, improbable as it was. There was no sign. No footprints, no out of place indentations in the ground along the perimeter, not even an animal trail Nothing.
The assassin did not scale the wall. The assassin did not break through the wall. If the assassin did not have a mistress on the inside, how had the breach occurred? The answer I kept coming back to, time and again, was that it was impossible. Yet it had happened, so it clearly was not impossible. Somewhere there was another possibility I had overlooked, and all I had to do now was find it. So far I had considered every possibility that made any sense whatsoever—
Perhaps it is time to consider a possibility which makes no sense at all.
Which turned out to be easier than I had believed it would be.
What if I was right about the method but wrong about the reason? Suppose one of the nuns had indeed opened the gate, not for a lover, but for the assassin, knowing all along what he was, what would happen?
The idea made me shudder, but once the possibility was considered, I realized there need be no assassin. Someone in league with the temple’s attackers would simply have opened the nunnery’s main gate to the temple compound directly and let the attackers who were already inside the walls into the nunnery itself. The small outside gate need never have been opened at all, not for a lover or anyone else. So . . . if not a lover, then why? Money? A nun grown tired of the ascetic life of contemplation in alliance with her sister nuns’ murderers for gold? As distasteful as such a possibility remained, I now had to consider it. I also considered it just as likely the corrupt nun was immediately cut down for her pains, since from the reports of both Tomoko and Rie, who had seen the attack from different positions, it was clear the attackers did not plan to leave anyone within the nunnery alive, and thus she would have become the very first victim . . .
I went back into the temple compound. My sister had gone into the village of Yahiko on an errand, but I found Tomoko. The old nun was praying and lighting incense in their temple. I waited until she was done.
“Tomoko-ana, I need to ask you something.”
“Certainly, Lord Yamada. How may I be of service?”
“I apologize for raising such a painful issue, but you and my sister were the primary attendants for the fallen nuns, yes?”
“Primary and only, my lord,” she said.
I took a breath. “Can you tell me whose body was found closest to the main gate?”
Tomoko frowned. “Let me think . . . oh. There were several near to the gate, but the closest was our late prioress, the Shibata nun.”
I thanked Tomoko and made my way back to our quarters. I found Kenji and Mai engrossed in a game of shogi. “I didn’t realize Mai-chan knew the game,” I said.
Kenji grunted. “She didn’t before I taught her. She even beats me now and again.”
No small feat in itself. If Kenji was not a shogi master, he was certainly the closest to one I had ever met. I could not beat him in more than a third of our matches, and I was a better than decent player in my own right. “Mai-chan, please excuse us for a moment. There is something I need to discuss with Kenji-san.”
Mai bowed and withdrew to a discreet distance, although she never left our sight. I kept my voice low as I related what I had found—or rather not found—in my examination of the nunnery walls. I then related my theory on the traitor nun. Kenji listened very attentively and withheld all comment until I had finished. Then he just sighed deeply.
“Lord Yamada, have you lost your mind?”
“I’m beginning to wonder this myself.”
“Considering this is the Shibata family temple, it should not be too surprising the prioress, by tradition, is recruited from that family. While there was some reluctance at the time of the nunnery’s founding, the position is now deemed a great honor. Why would she betray it?”
“I agree, it makes little sense,” I said. “Unless, painful as this is to consider, Tomoko, Mai, or my sister Rie were somehow involved?”
“You do realize this makes even less sense?” Kenji said. “Knowing what we know now about the nature of the attack, that those three survived attests more to their innocence than any suspicion of complicity.”
“I thought so as well, but my judgment where my sister is concerned cannot be dispassionate. Still, everything that does make sense has proved impossible, and I’m left with almost nothing. Regardless, the Shibata nun was closest to the gate at the time of the attack, which is suspicious, but even if she were responsible I cannot prove anything, and even if I could, doing so would not be . . . wise.”
“By which you mean you’d be dropping a steaming pile of nightsoil directly into the Minamoto/Shibata alliance?”
While I did not like Kenji’s choice of metaphor, I had to admit he had summed up the situation accurately. “Yes.”
“So—even if you are correct, you cannot prove it. If you could prove it, you would not because doing so would compromise Lord Yoshiie’s mission, and thus our own. Nor would proving anything explain why the Shibata nun would commit such a despicable act, because the only one who could shed any light on the question is dead. Is this about right?”
“You’re forgetting about Mai. We know she saw something. Perhaps it was the sight of the Shibata nun opening the gate that has so overwhelmed her.”
“Perhaps, but even if she did see exactly that and was able to say so, the reality of the situation is that she must keep silent. So. Is there a point to this line of inquiry?”
“Kenji-san, something is still not right here. I may not have Lady Kuzunoha’s instincts, but I do have my own. The danger is nowhere near past.”
“I agree, and so we must concentrate our efforts on keeping Lord Yoshiie safe until we can depart this place. You cannot do this by chasing ghost-lights through the forests of Echigo, can you?”
“One would not think so,” I said, “except I—at this moment—feel fairly useless in any other capacity. Perhaps chasing ghost-lights is all I can do for Lord Yoshiie.”
I had not realized what I said to Kenji might prove to be literally true—the guards on the road spotted the ghost-lights that very evening. Apparently not knowing what else to do, Master Akimasa had sent for me. Fortunately, Kenji and I had not yet retired, although we were near to it. We were forced to rouse Mai as well, since after the mamushi, neither of us was willing to risk leaving her alone and unguarded.
We left the compound by the main gate. To the left I could see where a new meadow was being created. Woodcutters from Yahiko and the surrounding area had been recruited to clear a large section of forest for both space and wood to fuel the funeral pyres that would be lit soon. It was not yet summer, but the corpses could not be left as they were for much longer without very unpleasant consequences. For the moment they remained guarded by both bushi and priests to keep scavengers—and worse—at bay. Tomorrow, if all went well, the bodies would be given up to the flames and their souls hastened to whatever awaited them beyond this world. Kenji, naturally, had his certainties about what that would be. I could never be so sure, until perhaps my own time to take my leave of the world had come. I had long since chosen not to consider the matter overmuch beforehand.
Master Akimasa met us there on the road, together with two of his archers. “This way, Lord Yamada.”
I had expected him to lead us in the direction of the shrouded bodies, but instead he proceeded north on the road toward the outer wall of the nunnery. We hadn’t gone very far before I could see what he was talking about. Kenji had already taken out his prayer beads and began to mumble something I recognized as part of the Diamond Sutra. Frankly, I was surprised he hadn’t already started a full exorcism, as his first instinct when confronted with a ghost was to banish it from this world. He considered doing so an act of kindness, but at the moment he just looked puzzled.
“Why just the onibi? And so few?”
I understood what he meant. There were ghost-lights hovering at the edge of the wooded hillside on side of the road opposite to the nunnery gate. Not ghosts themselves, or at least not full-blown ones, the small blue orbs danced in the air almost like fireflies. They were indications of the presence of a ghost, but their number suggested we were dealing with one ghost only, not a horde.
“What did you expect, Kenji-san? An invasion?”
“Weren’t you? Have you forgotten what happened here? What lies back down the road waiting on their funeral pyres?” he asked.
“Sudden and violent deaths may produce confused spirits,” I said. “But you know as well as I do this isn’t enough to produce a ghost. Ghosts linger in this world for their own reasons, and we don’t always understand what those reasons are.”
“Anger and revenge are powerful incentives for a ghost,” Kenji said dryly. “I would have expected more than one. No matter, and no matter their reasons, this one must depart. We must see to it.”
Kenji had his perspective. I had mine. “If this is the ghost of a nun, I need to talk to her.”
Akimasa turned about as pale as I’ve ever seen a living human being. “Talk . . . ?”
I smiled then. “Master Akimasa, despite what you may have been told, most ghosts aren’t especially dangerous. Startling, yes, even frightening, but seldom harmful unless one remains too close to one for an extended period. They feel the lack of living energy, and they tend to take it into themselves from whatever sources are handy—food, plants, and even people. With the proper precautions, I’ll be fine. Kenji?”
Kenji produced a paper spirit-ward from a pouch he kept tucked into his robes. This he gave to me. “Just keep it on your person. It will prevent the ghost from draining you like a wine gourd. Otherwise, be careful. We don’t yet understand what sort of ghost we’re dealing with.”
I took the ward and tucked it into my hitatare. “Master Akimasa, Kenji and I are going forward. Please look after Mai-chan until we return.” I turned to Mai and told her to wait there with Akimasa and his men, and she bowed to let me know she understood.
“We’ll remain here, but please don’t get yourself eaten,” Akimasa muttered. “Lord Yoshiie will blame me for it.”
“I will do my best to avoid such an unfortunate outcome,” I said.
As I drew closer, it was easier to count the precise number of onibi, but I still did not see the ghost. Kenji was barely a pace or two behind me. “It’s strange,” he said.
Many things were strange, so I had to ask, “What in particular?”
“Ghosts are many things, but one thing they are not is capricious. They are very specific about what they want and where they abide, though as you say, it’s not always clear to mortals why they do what they do. Yet you and I have both been on this road as night falls, and neither of us has seen anything here before. Why now?”
“A new manifestation, possibly, and its location which would suggest this was, indeed, one of the unfortunate nuns. Or it could be a monster of some deadly sort pretending to be a ghost, specifically to lure you and me in close.”
“Oh, fine,” Kenji said, “so many other people had been the targets of assassins lately. I was beginning to feel unwanted.”
“Don’t fret. I’m sure there are multitudes who would wish you dead. Probably the husbands and fathers and estranged lovers of your many inappropriate liaisons.”
“There are more than a few of those,” Kenji conceded. “But I’m doubtful . . . ah. I see our ghost now.”
So did I. The ghost hadn’t moved, but our angle of vision through the trees showed a gap, and there was the ghost, kneeling on the ground. I had seen ghosts manifest as giant lanterns, skeletons, floating heads, and in one case, a large fish, but this image was strictly human. A dignified-looking older woman in a nun’s robe and cowl, kneeling in prayer under the trees while the onibi swirled around her, blue flames in thrall to an elegant moth. I knew the ghost’s appearance was a nothing but memory and could change at any moment depending on the situation, but right now the spirit either perceived itself as a human being or merely wished to give that impression to observers. Either way, I hoped she would be in the mood to talk—or was even still capable of speech. I had known ghosts who could converse like any living person and others who were little more than a remembered purpose, and woe to any who were perceived as an obstacle to that purpose, whatever it might be.
“Do you think it is the prioress?” Kenji asked. “I never saw the body, so I don’t know what she looked like . . . assuming her attackers left her corpse in a recognizable state.”
“Let us find out.”
I approached cautiously, for all that I was reasonably certain the ghost was already aware of our presence. Even so, she appeared to take no notice. I realized, even as she prayed, her eyes never closed. They were fixed on a point across the road, and the intensity of the spirit’s gaze made me tremble a little. I tried to look in the direction she did, but all I could see was the wall of the temple and the rear gate to the nunnery. When I looked back at the ghost, I finally did notice something else.
The ghost-lights were disappearing.
I stopped where I was, just past the edge of the woods, and counted. Then I waited for a moment and counted again. There were definitely fewer of them the second time, and this was one more matter of the last several days that didn’t make any sense. Onibi were not spirits themselves but more like moths drawn, for whatever reason, to the spiritual flame that was a ghost. For the onibi to be disappearing meant either the ghost was losing coherence as an entity and was about to dissipate, or—
She’s eating them!
The glow surrounding the ghost had been growing in intensity but so slowly I hadn’t even noticed. It was the disappearance of the ghost-lights that finally helped me make the connection and showed me what I should have been looking for. I took another step forward, and now I could feel it—the sensation was like standing on the edge of a cliff, only you knew the cliff wanted to pull you down. I felt light-headed and sick at once. It took a great effort to move back.
“My name is Yamada no Goji,” I said. “I wish to speak to you.”
The ghost turned to me, and her face changed. There was nothing about the serenity of praying nun about it then. Her visage was monstrous.
“Kenji, move toward the wall,” I shouted, just as the creature began a low growl in the depths of its throat.
“Why?” he asked.
“The ghost is gathering strength, and it would have taken mine except for your ward. That tells me it is planning something. I have the distinct feeling that whatever it is will not be pleasant.”
I circled the ghost until I was between it and the gate, with Kenji a few paces behind me. The ghost finally stood and approached the road, and there were no ghost-lights to be seen. I spoke to the creature directly. “Again, I would speak to you. I am Yamada no Goji. Are you the Shibata nun?”
There was no growl. This time the creature smiled at me. The smile grew wider and wider, and it was nothing but a show of long, pointed teeth. The ghost reached out toward me with arms grown long and taloned like a demon’s.
“Kenji, ward the gate!”
The ghost’s manifestation had moved beyond the ethereal and was rapidly approaching the demonic. I had let her seeming serenity lull me into misunderstanding the situation—rage and hatred were evident in the creature’s countenance now, and I knew these two powerful forces were in the process of transforming the creature into an ogre. I had seen that happen once before and only now understood how much trouble I was in. I scarcely had time to glance back at the nunnery to see Kenji placing a spirit ward on the gate before I drew my tachi and settled into a swordsman’s stance. Kenji began chanting behind me. The tone and inflections were familiar, but I couldn’t understand the words. Whatever they were, they appeared to have no effect on the ghost, who had now turned the entirety of her attention on me.
“I can see that you are not in the mood for conversa—”
She struck so fast I almost didn’t see it coming. I barely deflected her blow as she aimed the talons of her left hand like a spear. I heard a shriek from where we had left Akimasa and Mai but didn’t dare turn my attention away from the ghost. It had grown powerful enough to attack with physical force, and I knew it was only Kenji’s talisman in my robe that kept the creature from draining my life-force like a leech. As matters stood, its direct attacks were more than enough to concern me. I dodged another—by a hair’s breadth—and the third time its talons struck sparks from my tachi as if we’d clashed metal on metal.
Whatever questions I’d hoped to ask the prioress—if indeed this ravening monster before me was once that person—were now moot. The creature was now little more than a purpose given form and power, and I still did not know what that purpose was. Nor could I take the risk of stepping aside to find out. Allowing such a thing in its current state and temper into either the nunnery or the temple compound was unthinkable.
“Kenji-san, I can’t hold it off forever!”
Kenji barely paused in his chant to shout the word “Stall!” before resuming his chant with redoubled fervor. I understood. Whatever he was attempting might take more time than either of us had, but it was the only chance. It wasn’t as if I could slay the thing with my sword—it was already dead.
There was a blur on my left, and then a spear struck the creature with a sound like an ax on wood. Akimasa held onto the other end with grim determination.
“Get back!” I shouted, but it was too late. The revenant merely clutched the spear shaft in its talons, trapping the weapon as it struck with its other hand, rather more a swat than a focused blow, but the impact sent Akimasa spinning back into the darkness. The ghost plucked out the spear like a splinter and then snapped the shaft in its talons. In its renewed rage it seemed to grown even larger. A few more moments and its transformation into an oni would be complete. If there remained any chance of stopping the thing, it had to be now. I swung my sword at the creature in the hope of driving it back a step or two, but I failed to consider how completely unconcerned the thing was with me and my sewing-needle of a weapon. It merely flicked the blade aside with one talon and then slashed across my chest. I felt a deep burning in my flesh, and suddenly my legs failed me. I found myself sitting on the ground with my sword beside me with no clear memory of how I’d gotten there. The creature raised one taloned paw to finish me off; there was nothing I could do about it. I tried to prepare myself for the blow, but it never came.
I heard the sound of running feet, and then someone was standing between me and the ghost. It was Mai. She stood, trembling, with her arms outstretched as if to shield me; it was like watching a rabbit try to face down a bear.
“Mai-chan, run! She’ll kill you!”
Mai did no such thing.
Neither did the ghost. It just stared at the girl, a quizzical expression on its face as if it could not quite understand what was happening. Mai slowly lowered her arms and bowed to the monster. Much to my shock, the creature returned the gesture. Then it began to shrink and transform back into its original appearance. When the transformation was complete, it smiled a sad smile and turned back in the direction it had come, now fully in the form of a human woman. In another moment it had disappeared into the wooded hillside, and Kenji and Mai both were kneeling at my side. I heard shouts from up the road and more running.
“I’m all right. See to Akimasa,” I said.
“You are most certainly not all right,” Kenji said, after giving me a quick going over. “But you’ll probably live. Mai-chan, please stay with him.” Kenji left, and I tried to get up, only to realize that, no, I was most definitely not all right. After a moment or two I found even sitting up was entirely too much effort. I let Mai half-lower, half-drop me the rest of the way to the ground, where I was content to lie while the girl fussed over me. She pulled a cloth from her obi and pressed it against my chest. I could still feel the sting of the ghost’s talons, but I was reasonably certain the scratches were not deep, despite the blood. I was only mildly interested when I noticed the corner of a piece of paper sticking out of my now-ragged hitatare. I managed to pull it out and realized it was Kenji’s spirit-ward. Its condition was somewhat shredded and blood-spattered, not unlike my chest.
“That’s it,” I said to Mai or possibly no one in particular, “It wasn’t the blow itself. When she disabled the talisman she drained my strength, but I will recover.”
Mai made a face and continued trying to press the cloth firmly against my wounds. The bleeding had already subsided.
“Thank you,” I said. “I think you saved my life but, honestly, I do not understand why either of us is still alive.”
Mai let out a small sigh, but that was her only response. I persisted. “You saw her face . . . her original face, didn’t you? Was she the former prioress? The one they called the Shibata nun?”
Mai still didn’t speak, but the answer was clear in her eyes as she began to weep.
Mai knows even more than I once believed. But what has locked her tongue, and why will it not release?
I yawned. I probably didn’t mean to say what I said next aloud, but I was having some trouble telling the difference between my voice in the world and the voice in my head. “Such silence may get us all killed.”
The last thing I remembered was Mai smiling at me, but the tears had yet to stop. When I awoke again it was daylight—I could tell by the way it filtered into the room through the cracks in the walls and the tears in the screens. I was back in our quarters. My robe was open and Mai was very gently washing my chest. It hurt, regardless of how gentle she was. I must have moaned, because she hesitated a moment before continuing her work.
That will be a scar . . . or rather, several.
I heard the screen slide open.
“About time you’re awake. I was beginning to doubt my estimate of your condition.” Kenji stood there, looking disapproving. “Honestly, Lord Yamada, you’ll wear the poor girl out. She’s hardly left your side.”
“How long was I asleep?”
“The balance of last night and most of this day. I’ve arranged some food. If you can stand, let’s get you cleaned up.”
After washing and dealing with more pressing bodily functions, I felt somewhat better, for all that I still felt very unsteady on my feet. “Did you see what happened?” I asked.
“You mean aside from the ghost knocking you on your arse?”
“I mean when Mai-chan saved my life.”
“I did, yes. I was sure I’d lost both of you. The rite of exorcism is a delicate one and can only be hurried so much. As it was, I never got to finish it.”
“Meaning the ghost will be back.”
“Perhaps,” Kenji said. He looked thoughtful. “Yet how can we be certain? We don’t even know why it left in the first place. I doubt it was the exorcism rite—the creature hardly knew I was there.”
“It apparently recognized Mai-chan and didn’t wish to harm her.”
“So much so it turned from its purpose? Granted, we don’t know what its purpose was, but whatever its goal, that goal was clearly on the other side of Mai. So why did the thing stop?”
“I don’t know. But I’m beginning to think Mai does.”
Mai kept still as if she hadn’t listened to a word we’d said, but I knew better. The puzzle of Mai was no longer a less-pressing concern. I was coming to believe Mai was perhaps the key to everything. If nothing else, the Shibata nun had driven that particular lesson home.
“Oh, I remember now . . . Akimasa? How . . . how is he?”
“Better than you, I think,” Kenji said. “Bruised and sore, but the blow was almost an afterthought. She didn’t drain him the way she did you . . . yes, I found what was left of my talisman when Akimasa’s bushi carried you back here. Lord Yamada, I saw the thing’s face when you spoke your name. If I didn’t know better, I would think the ghost was angry at you personally.”
“But why? I never met the woman before her death, nor have I had any dealings with the Shibata Clan until now. She certainly had no reason to dislike me.”
“That is just how it appeared,” Kenji said, also clearly at a loss. “It makes no sense, I do admit.”
“I’m getting very weary of matters which make no sense. We need to find some answers soon. I have the feeling Lord Yoshiie’s life may not be the only one in the balance.”
“Speaking of whom, I was instructed to say he is very cross with you. He does not wish to have to explain himself to Prince Kanemore if you were to get yourself killed.”
“Coming from Lord Yoshiie, that almost sounded like concern. Regardless, we need to prepare for the ghost’s return . . . if it does return. I still wish to speak to it.”
I was watching for Mai’s reaction, but there was none. She merely rose and removed the bowl with its tainted water she’d used to wash me earlier. Kenji just sighed. “Lord Muramasa has ordered his chief priests to assist in the exorcism, should that be required,” Kenji said. “With their help I believe I can conclude the exorcism quickly, but probably not in time to save your life if the ghost returns and is determined to kill you. Perhaps you should bring Mai for protection.”
In my weakness and to my shame I actually considered this, but only for a moment. “No, Mai is too valuable to risk, so I’m afraid I’ll have to take my chances. Just be certain that Lord Yoshiie keeps the balance of his priests around himself in case we fail.”
“Already arranged as a precaution, but do you really think the Shibata nun would harm Lord Yoshiie?”
“At this point, Kenji-san, I do not know what to think.”
That evening, as I stood at the nunnery’s north gate, the situation was somewhat different than the night before. Kenji stood in a semi-circle of monks and priests, all with prayer beads out and ready. Two score of Lord Yoshiie’s bushi stood with their bows at the ready. I, however, was not even carrying my sword. Master Akimasa and myself were not the only ones battered and bruised from the previous evening. My tachi was also in need of tending and was currently in the care of a Minamoto sword polisher, which I considered to be just as well, as I was still too weak to use it effectively and doubted it would be of much use in any case. As a rule, swords were not very effective against a creature already dead, even if it was manifesting physically. Regardless, it was all I could do to walk, even leaning on the priest’s staff Kenji had loaned me. He had taken care to weave talismans into the brass rings on its top, and they muffled the jingling of the rings as I walked.
Akimasa stood in command of the archers, and he appeared unharmed save for a dark bruise under his right eye. I had already formally thanked him for his bravery, which he dismissed as merely part of Yoshiie’s directive to “keep Yamada out of trouble.” Mai was back in our quarters, under guard. Other bushi were in the nunnery itself, as a precaution in case the ghost managed to elude us, though if matters went badly, I wasn’t sure what use they would be. I had forewarned my sister and Tomoko-ana, and if they did hear the exorcism rite begin from outside the walls, they promised to join in immediately, and I certainly hoped they would do so. It might be their only chance.
“It’s begun,” I heard Kenji say.
I spotted the onibi even as Kenji spoke. “If I’m going to make another attempt, it has to be now, before it gathers too much strength,” I said. “Stand ready.”
Slowly, because indeed I could move at no other speed, I made my way through the edge of the forest on the far side of the road. I hadn’t noticed how quickly the land began to rise the night before, probably because I had been much more steady on my feet then. I had to move carefully, placing the tip on the staff on the next bit of clear pathway and taking each step in turn. Even so, it did not take very long to reach the ghost.
Just as on the night before, she kneeled in prayer in a small clearing with the ghost-lights swirling about her head. There were more of them this time. I shuddered to think what she would be like once she had begun to absorb them all.
“You are the Shibata nun,” I said.
For a moment I wondered if she had heard me, but then she slowly turned in my direction, and I heard my name, clearly spoken. “Yamada.”
“You remember me.” We had only “met” the night before, but she had been far from being human then. I was a little surprised she did remember.
“I am sorry,” she said.
I blinked. I don’t know what I had expected from her, but this certainly was not it. “For trying to kill me? That no longer matters now. I need to ask you—”
“You don’t understand,” she said. “But you will. I am so sorry.”
She was right. I did not understand, but I tried to take the first step toward understanding. “I need to ask you—did you open the gate to your attackers?”
“The one who betrayed us is dead,” she said softly. “The one who killed us still lives. See to it. Take care of Mai.”
“It was not you?”
“No,” she said, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a look of greater sadness on anyone’s face in my life, alive or dead.
“Why did you attack the nunnery?”
She shook her head slowly. “Take care of Mai,” she repeated. I could already see the distance in her dark eyes. “Help me,” she said. “I must go.”
“Help you . . . ?
“Please. Help me . . . go.”
I looked up. There were fewer ghost-lights than there had been. The transformation would soon be happening again. The puzzling thing was I had come to the opinion the Shibata nun did not wish to become the creature that nearly destroyed me and Akimasa, but it was clearly beyond her power to prevent the transformation would happen with or without her consent. The purpose chaining her soul to this world had not changed and so would act on her even if she no longer wished it. But I still did not know what that purpose was, and the ghost was telling me what she wanted to tell me or what she could tell me, which was not what I wanted to know.
Is it, perhaps, what I need to know?
I hoped so, because I was out of time. I called out to the priests, “Master Kenji, Gentlemen—please proceed.”
The droning chants of the rite of exorcism began immediately, this time echoed by a dozen voices. Even so, I was afraid I’d started too late. One by one I watched the onibi disappear like dying fireflies, but still the ghost of the Shibata nun did not rise nor change appearance. I did see her hands clench so tightly that phantom blood began to trickle onto her robes, but still she did not move.
She is fighting the transformation with all of her strength.
“You do not wish to leave this world as a monster, do you? Please keep trying. It won’t be much longer.”
I hoped I was right, but my words did seem to steady the ghost a little, and even though she could no longer truly breathe, I saw her chest rise and fall slowly as someone trying to enter a meditative state. Then her entire body trembled, and the transformation began, slowly enough, but the change was definite. Her fingers elongated into talons, her white hair escaped the cowl and turned wild and flowing as if blown by an unseen wind. I don’t know what reserves of spiritual strength the Shibata nun summoned, but she pushed the monster her nature was trying to make of her back into whatever dark recesses from which it had emerged. Her hair fell to her shoulders, her fingers were just fingers again, her hands a delicate woman’s hands.
Her image began to fade. The exorcism was working. She looked at me. “Thank you.”
Her words were so soft on the wind I wasn’t entirely sure I’d heard what I thought I heard, and then she was gone. The exorcism was over. The remaining ghost-lights milled about overhead for a little while as if lost, then drifted away. The timbre of the chant was different now. Kenji and his fellow priests were praying. It was over.
I heard the sound of the nunnery gate being thrown open, then a babble of voices jarred against the prayers. I hobbled out of the woods just in time to see one of the bush assigned to guard the surviving nuns come speeding past the priests.
“Lord Yamada! Please come quickly . . . ” The man paused to catch his breath.
“What is the matter?”
“Your sister, Lady Rie. She has collapsed.”