THE BLANK CEILING ABOVE stares down at me. It’s a brazen white. It has no personality. No comfort. Just like this ceiling, my life’s been washed away. This room is nothing like my old room, painted purple with the stars and the moon projected onto the dark backdrop. It’s like I’ve started my life over—even down to my personality.
My parents didn’t have a funeral. They were burned badly in our house anyway. I was going to go with them. I don’t remember much from when I blacked out after discarding my black diamond back then, but I know I started that fire. I must not have been able to contact my parents because cremating a body discourages that body’s spirit from remaining here. More than anything, I want to talk to my parents. I wouldn’t have started that fire if I had connected to them. My parents never wanted a funeral, and so Fiona had the rest of their remains cremated when the police got all the information they could out of their burned remains. I keep holding on to hope. I keep hoping they’re still here. It’s possible, but even if they are, I don’t know how to contact them. I don’t know how to control this connection I have with the dead.
Didi and Connor have been texting and calling regularly since I left Reverie over two weeks ago. At first, I answered them, but as time went on, and Fiona kept dodging my questions, I stopped. She still won’t be straight with me. She doesn’t want me to think about my parents’ death or the monster that killed them, but her ignoring me isn’t helping the situation.
She got me set up with online classes, but I haven’t even bothered to look at them, and I spend most of my time in bed. Fiona’s never around because she’s always off working in some office. I’m never alone in the apartment, though. It seems my godmother doesn’t trust me enough for that or something. Her peculiar friend and possible roommate, Divya, stays with me whenever Fiona isn’t around—which is basically all the time. She’s tried talking to me, but I’m not interested in making small talk about energies, yoga, or meditation.
Unless she plans on filling me in on all the things Fiona won’t, I have nothing to say to her. I’d rather be alone. I do what I do, and Divya does what she does. She’s always meditating and burning incense. She’s always serene. I envy her for that. She’s offered over and over to help me find peace of mind, but I know there’s no way a little meditation or incense burning is going to bring me that. Not even my black diamond can give me peace of mind.
As I stare up at the fresh canvas above my head, the ceiling with no personality, I accept that it’s just reflecting who I am and what I’ve become. I don’t feel anything anymore. It used to hurt a lot, and I used to cry a lot. But nothing seems to matter anymore. It’s the third day of November. Halloween came and went, and life in Reverie has gone back to normal—except for one thing. The twins told me that Rynne hasn’t returned their calls since yesterday. He called to talk to me briefly yesterday, but he seemed busy.
I’ve tried to tell myself that it’s nothing to worry about, but it seems I don’t know how not to be worried. I’ve been trying to call him all morning. He hasn’t answered. What if he’s in danger? What if Arsen decided my parents weren’t enough? I can feel my heart pounding in my chest as I consider the possibilities.
I check my phone again for any messages, but there are none.
There’s a knock at my door. “I’m going to work,” Fiona calls. “Divya’s here.”
I don’t say anything. Fiona knows I’m angry about all of this, so she doesn’t wait for a response. I hear her footsteps as they creak away.
I stay in my room. My mind is swimming in images of the vampire who killed my parents. He’s always there, whether my eyes are opened or closed. I said I don’t feel anything, but that’s not entirely true. I feel something when I see that monster in my mind’s eye. I feel things I shouldn’t feel, proof that he’s marked me and has a hold on me. There’s only one thing that matters to me anymore, and that’s not letting this evil consume me. It’s too confusing. I should feel nothing but hate for him, but there’s some other emotion that always accompanies my thoughts of him. Pain. Longing.
I won’t become a tool for evil. There is nothing I want from that monster. Whatever I was feeling that night, whatever I was searching for in his eyes, none of it was me. This is why monsters are so dangerous. They promote darkness. They can make you think, feel, and even do things you never thought you’d do. That’s evil. It corrupts.
Feeling some strength return to my body, some purpose, I roll out of my bed and pack what little belongings I have into a backpack. I’m leaving tonight. If Fiona won’t help me, I’ll do this myself. I’ll find Arsen and put an end to this. How am I supposed to move on when he’s all I can think about? How am I supposed to move on knowing the monster who killed my parents is still out there?
I nervously play with the heart-shaped black diamond around my neck. It’s a powerful crystal. It’s the only one that’s been able to protect me from the spirits that always tried to bombard me as a kid. Did it protect me from that vampire, too? Is that why he staggered like that? Or was it all some kind of show? Maybe he just decided he didn’t want to kill me yet.
I bite down on my tongue, disgusted with the word “kill.” I’ve never felt so angry before. I’ve never hated anyone like I hate Arsen. Maybe my black diamond isn’t working anymore. It seems not even my black diamond can protect me from these toxic thoughts. What’s happening to me? I don’t feel like myself anymore. I’m not a hateful person. I’m not… but a vampire doesn’t deserve anything but my hatred. Any feelings I have for him that stray from hate are lies. Anything I think I want for him is a lie.
Lies.
Another knock at my door. Divya’s slightly accented voice sounds through the door, muffled, “Tasia? Shall we try meditating together today? If you’re diligent in your practice, I promise it will make you feel better.”
“The only thing that’s going to make me feel better is if that vampire dies,” I mutter.
Divya opens my door, wearing an intricately patterned kurti. Her eyes rest on my backpack. “Going somewhere?”
“I’m leaving,” I say bitterly.
“To do what?”
I shrug. “Slay a vampire?”
“Fiona would be upset to find you gone.”
I sit on my bed, my backpack at my side. I’m fully aware Divya isn’t going to let me just walk out of here.
“You’re not going to let this go, right?” Divya asks. The way she’s asking makes me think she already knows the answer to that question.
I reply, “No. I’m not.”
“I told Fiona to just tell you, but she insisted on trying to deter you from this kind of life.”
“I was born into this kind of life. My parents taught me about the supernatural since I was born. Spirits came to me.”
“Taught you and sheltered you.”
“Maybe they shouldn’t have sheltered me then. Maybe they’d still be alive! Just what kind of life do you people live? Why didn’t anyone ever tell me just how real monsters are?”
“If I promise you’ll get answers tonight, will you promise not to run away?”
“Done,” I say.
I stay in my room for the rest of the day. Divya allows it. She doesn’t try to get me to meditate or talk about my feelings. She just hangs out in the living room while I hang out in my room, waiting for Fiona to come home.
I try contacting Rynne a few more times. I never manage to get him on the phone, but he does text me, saying he’s fine and that he’ll explain why he apparently left Reverie without a word to the twins as soon as he gets a chance. It’s like trying to get answers out of Fiona all over again, and it only makes me angrier about everything.
I feel alienated.
The hours go by and eventually I hear Fiona come home. The apartment is too small to hide the sound of the front door opening. I don’t bother leaving my room, though. I’m tired of begging her for answers. This time Divya gets to do it. I only hope I get the answers she promised.
About a half hour passes before Fiona opens my door. She doesn’t bother knocking.
“Sounds like we have some things to talk about,” she says. “I was trying to respect your parents’ wishes, but as Divya pointed out, there’s no reason to keep this from you any longer. You’ll go off and do something reckless if I don’t, so I guess it’s better to tell you.” She pauses. “You’re only sixteen. I was hoping I could wait to tell you all of this until you were at least eighteen, but life doesn’t always work out the way you want.” She laughs, but it’s a bitter sound. “Your parents didn’t want this life for you, but it’s found you regardless.
“Tasia, Divya and I are part of the EEA, the Evil Extermination Association. I only work at an office part of the time. The rest of what I do is field work. I’m the commander of the Pennsylvania Branch of the EEA. Your parents were part of the EEA, too. They retired from that life when they found out they were pregnant with you.”
“EEA?” I repeat dumbly.
“Yes. Evil, monsters, ghosts, all the things your parents ever taught you about have been a problem for humans since the beginning of time, but most people see these things as an undercurrent or a myth. Make no mistake, monsters are real. They’re smart and good at hiding. Their numbers are much smaller than ours, too. This is why most people don’t even know of their existence. The odds of someone getting attacked by a creature of the night are relatively low—even with times changing and those odds rising. Because of that, we’re an independent group with no relation to the world’s governments or anything like that.”
“So it’s illegal?” I ask.
“Not exactly. We are an official group, worldwide, but only those who believe in the supernatural and want to combat evil pay us any attention. The US government, for one, just sees us as an eccentric religious group.”
“That sounds really ignorant of them.”
“It is, but it’s easier for them to be ignorant about us and the monsters we hunt. There’s a world full of crazy people for them to worry about.”
I stare at my lap. “Why would my parents hide the EEA from me? Why didn’t they prepare me better? Why didn’t they tell me just how real monsters are?”
“Your parents loved you, Tasia,” Fiona assures me. “They hoped you’d never find yourself in the kind of situation where you’d have a desire to seek out an organization like the EEA. It’s a dangerous world.”
“I’m part of that world,” I whisper. “Maybe if they had told me the truth from the beginning, they’d still be alive.”
“Your parents were the best of the best.”
“Then what were they doing in Reverie?”
“What your parent did isn’t unusual, Tasia. Wanting to get out of this life isn’t unusual, especially when children are involved. Your parents still ended up teaching you much more about the supernatural than they wanted to.”
“Because I have a sixth sense.”
Fiona nods. “More than anything, they wanted you to have a normal life. Even with your ties to the spirits of the dead, they hoped they could discourage you from knowing about this part of the world. The dangerous part.”
“If they haven’t been part of the EEA since I was born, why did they have to die?” I whisper.
“I wish I had the answer to that question. There often isn’t an answer. I did learn one thing, though, about the monster that killed your parents.”
“The vampire?” I ask.
“It seems he isn’t a vampire. He’s something worse: a demon.”
“D-demon?” I become aware of my heart pounding in my chest.
Divya joins us and the conversation, saying, “Are you certain? An actual demon?”
Fiona frowns. “It’s the only thing that makes sense. I don’t want to believe it, but I know a few vampires wouldn’t have been able to kill the Wrens. At first, I thought a coven must have decided to terrorize Reverie, but I’m afraid it’s worse than that.”
“You think it was demons,” Divya says. “We’ve never even seen demons before.”
“No, but we’ve heard stories of the past. Many religious texts mention demons. We all know there’s some truth to stories.”
“So you’ve never heard of Arsen before,” I say, dejected. “That means you have no information on him. No leads.”
“I actually do.”
“What?” Divya exclaims. “You didn’t tell me anything about that.”
“I just got the lead yesterday, as well as a splendid new addition to the EEA.” Fiona studies me with intense eyes like she’s trying to glean information from me without asking the question.
“W-what?” I ask. I feel like I’m melting under her gaze.
“What do you know about your friend Rynne?”
I stare at her dumbly. Why is she changing the subject like that? What does Rynne have to do with any of this? What…
“Do you know where Rynne is?” I ask incredulously. “Didi and Connor told me he left town without a word, and I feel like he’s ignoring my calls.”
“He’s fine,” she says.
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
“Yes, I know where Rynne is.”
Crazy thoughts start popping into my head. Fiona started talking about Rynne right after saying she has some information on Arsen. She knows where he is. He couldn’t possibly be involved in this messed-up life, could he? Not the Rynne I know. He’s too perfect. Too kind.
“He told you about Arsen?” I ask. My voice is trembling.
Fiona regards me for just a moment before answering. “Yes. It seems he has personal experience with Arsen. I’m sorry, Tasia. You wanted the truth. Here it is.”
“Has anyone ever been honest with me in my entire life?” I demand.
I can’t believe this. Rynne’s been lying to me, too? He knows about all of this? He knows about Arsen? Does that mean Arsen ruined his life like he ruined mine? Are Rynne’s parents even alive or was that another lie? Why else would he be living in Reverie’s hotel all by himself? But then where did he get the money?
“No hunter wishes this life on anyone else, Tasia,” Fiona says. “No one was hiding the truth from you to hurt you. I’m sure of that.”
Tears are stinging my eyes. I don’t even know what I’m mad about. Part of me wishes I didn’t know about any of this. Another part of me wishes I’d known it all sooner. Maybe it would have made a difference. Maybe it wouldn’t have.
“My boyfriend was killed by a werebeast. A werebear specifically,” Fiona says.
“The monsters brought out by a full moon,” I mutter. “Wait. The same boyfriend who owned your Camaro?”
“Yes. His death set me on the path to becoming a hunter, and in the end, I found my way to the EEA. Your parents were already members. They knew a lot more about hunting than I did. They became my teachers, but they also became my friends.”
I take a deep breath to fight off my tears. “What are we going to do about it? What are we going to do about Arsen?”
“I’m not going to let him get away with this, Tasia. It’s going to take time to find him. There isn’t much known about demons, but I’ll do everything in my power to find him and kill him. You have my word.”
I shudder at the word “kill.” Fiona doesn’t think I can handle this. She doesn’t want to include me in hunting Arsen down. I have to find a way to convince her I can help.
“Can you tell me more about my connection to the spirits of the dead?” I ask. “I tried to use it to find my parents back when… but I blacked out.”
“You haven’t been strengthening your ability,” Divya answers. “You’ve been sheltered from it, so that doesn’t surprise me. Fiona had me looking for your parents’ ghosts to try and get some answers as well, but I didn’t have any luck finding them. This means they’ve probably moved on. Even those who can communicate with the spirits of the dead can’t reach out to spirits that have moved on.”
“You have a sixth sense, too,” I say. “Spirits come to you.”
“Yes.”
I fidget with my black diamond. “Teach me,” I say. “Teach me how to use this ability. If anyone can find my parents, I can.”
Divya frowns.
“It’s worth a try!” I insist. “Why would they just move on after being brutally murdered like that? Let me become a hunter. I can help you find Arsen. My parents can help us find Arsen. The more information we have, the better chance we have of finding him. When can I join the EEA?”
Fiona’s eyes harden. “I still don’t think—”
“Please!” I beg. “I won’t get in the way! I can be useful. Even though I don’t know anything about fighting, having a sixth sense is worth something, right? I won’t get in the way.”
“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”
She doesn’t understand. I’ve never been so driven to do anything in my life. This is all there is. I have to… I have to kill Arsen. I’ve heard stories of demons. You find mention of them in practically every religious text. They’re creatures made of pure darkness and evil. They shouldn’t exist in our world.
“You don’t understand,” I say. “I can’t stop thinking about him. He’s always there, inside my head. Maybe my black diamond saved me back when I met him in my house, or maybe he was screwing around with me, and that’s how I survived. But he won’t leave my mind. I know the other monsters there that night must have been demons too, but something about Arsen…”
Fiona rubs her temples. “We know the female you saw with Arsen is for sure another demon. Her name is Yuki. Rynne said that Arsen is the one calling the shots, at least between the two demons you saw.” She sighs. “Fine. I’ll let you join the EEA, Tasia. But there’s a condition: you have to continue school. You have to finish high school through those online courses. If you cram, you could end up graduating early. The choice of pace is yours, but I’m not letting your education go to waste just like that.”
“I can do that,” I say.
“All recruits go through a physical test, regardless of where you end up inside the EEA.”
“I’ll do whatever I have to do.”
Just as I say the words, I get this overwhelming sensation that Arsen is near. I look out the window, expecting to see him there, but all that greets me is the night. I need to stop this before I lose my mind.