After elbowing their way through the crowds of tourists competing for space on Juneau’s narrow streets, Goldie whisked her mother and uncle out of downtown. Her rusty old Subaru, adorned with bits of duct tape patching the fenders, whizzed along Egan Expressway toward Mendenhall Glacier.
Flossie looked out the window at a couple of fishing boats as the road followed Gastineau Channel to the Mendenhall Valley. “Oh Boy. I can’t wait till we get to the glacier,” she said. “I remember the way you were driving along that residential street last time, and all of a sudden there’s this big hunk of ice looming up ahead. Remember that grumpy old Mr. Mandelson who lived down the street from us?”
She thought for a moment before continuing. “He always used to say he lived in Alaska when he was young. I wonder if there was someone famous in his family that the glacier was named after. Or even him, that old iceberg. That would really be a kick, wouldn’t it?”
Goldie replied with a chuckle, “Good luck, Mom. The name of the glacier is Mendenhall, not Mandelson.”
The day went by much too quickly. After a lecture at the Glacier Visitor Center, Goldie took the oldsters to a few scenic overlooks before heading back to town.
“I’m gettin’ mighty hungry back here,” Sterling said as he leaned forward and tapped Goldie on the shoulder. “We haven’t eaten since breakfast on the boat. I could go for a big juicy burger or something.”
Flossie’s eyes lit up. “Oh! Let’s go to that Red Dog place near Goldie’s shop. It was a lot of fun last time we were here in Juneau.”
“It might be kind of crowded with all the ships in, Mom, but since it’s well past lunchtime we’ll give it a try. I’ll park the car and drop Waldo off at the shop.”
The Red Dog Saloon was bustling with activity when they arrived. The honky-tonk piano player was belting out a tune when he spied Goldie in the crowd. “Hey, hey!” he shouted into the microphone, “here comes my pal, the Queen of Antiques.” He waved to the hostess, “Find her a table in front, Lola. I’ve got a special song for her.”
“You know just about everyone in Juneau, don’t you Goldie?”
“Not everyone, Unk, but I do know most of the townies. The piano player is Bucky Bailey. Believe it or not, I shared a house with him and about six other people up on Chicken Ridge when I first came to Juneau. Everyone in the house was in his little band. He taught me how to play the washboard, spoons and kazoo.” She sighed. “It seems like only yesterday.”
“Well, I’m your mother, and to me it seems like you left home a century ago.”
“You’re exaggerating again, Flossie.”
“Actually, Unk, it was last century. I can hardly believe it, it’s been about 25 years.”
Sterling ordered the biggest burger on the menu and Flossie tried the halibut basket. With his mouth full of the Red Dog’s best offering, Sterling said, “Hey, your friend Bucky is really good. Reminds me of an old vaudeville performer.”
They left the saloon and headed back down the street to the Silver Spoon. After saying goodbye to Goldie and Rudy, Flossie and Sterling walked back to the ship and up the gangplank with Waldo in tow. By the time they settled into the plush passenger lounge, the Aurora Borealis had pulled up anchor and was headed south.
***
When the ship docked in Vancouver, Flossie and Sterling decided to stay on board instead of going into town again. They plunked themselves down on a loveseat in the reception area to watch the touring magicians as they boarded the ship. Waldo curled up at their feet and took a nap.
“Well, Old Girl, pretty soon we’ll see if some of our pals from the old days are still alive and kicking.”
“Hey, they can’t all be pushing up daisies. We knew plenty of young bucks, too. Red said the lineup is great. The cruise director set up three shows a day so all the magicians in the group can have a whack at wowing the audience.”
“I’ll bet a lot of passengers chose this cruise because they’re fans of the performers.”
“Yep, he said some pretty big names are on the list.” The old woman held up her fingers and ticked them off. “Let’s see, there’s Willard the Wonderful, Fast Fingers Frankie, and The Amazing Amador. Oh, and he mentioned that guy with the turban you keep yakking about, Sheik Ali Kazaam.”
Sterling’s eyes sparkled when Flossie mentioned the turban. “Ya know, Flossie, I’ll bet Guadalupe can whip one up for me. Do you still have that big gaudy broach Harry gave you as a gag gift years ago? Maybe you could lend it to me for the front.” The old man’s eyes glazed over. “I can just picture it.”
Flossie threw her arms up in the air and looked heavenward. “Turban, smurban, enough already!” She pointed toward the main entrance. “There, feast your eyes on that.”
Sheik Ali Kazaam, resplendent in the coveted headgear, strode in with a beautiful Eurasian girl on his arm. She wore brilliant yellow heels and a matching sequined mini-dress that showed off every one of her remarkable curves. The reception clerk’s eyes widened as he looked her up and down, paying no attention to the pompous Ali Kazaam.
The shunned sheik pounded his fist on the desk, causing the embarrassed clerk to tuck his eyeballs back into his head. A faint blush spread across his face turning his complexion the color of Pepto Bismol.
The elegant magician bowed with a showy salaam. “I am Sheik Ali Kazaam and this is my assistant Jade Moon. Are our cabins ready?”
Sterling couldn’t stop staring at the Sheik. Waldo raised his sleepy head, looked around, snuffled prrreeettty, and laid his head back down.
The Sheik and Jade were the first of the magicians to board the ship. Flossie and Sterling sat in the lobby for about two hours and watched as more and more masters of illusion checked in. They watched at least a hundred magicians board, but so far not one in the exotic parade was anyone they knew.
Flossie sighed. “Well, Sterling, either all the old troopers have kicked the bucket or they didn’t have enough dough to buy a ticket on this fancy tub.”
“Yeah, let’s take Waldo back to the cabin and eat some lunch at the buffet.”
Flossie wound Waldo’s leash around her veined hand and started to get up when a young man planted himself in front of them. She adjusted her glasses to get a sharper look. His outfit was quite impressive—tight black leather pants topped with a billowy black silk shirt open to the waist. Around his neck were heavy gold chains with various medallions featuring the symbolic black eagle. A red vest completed the costume, but his most impressive feature was his white-blond hair done up in eight-inch spikes around his youthful face.
Traces of a slight accent were evident when he said, “Hi there, I’m Hans Kugelhoffer, winner of this year’s German Magician Medal and you must be the Scintillating Silvers.”
Sterling pulled himself up to full height. “What makes you say that?”
“Ach, I think you are perhaps the only magicians on the cruise who have eighty years, and how vonderful, I think, they pay a tribute to you, no?”
The oldsters had no idea what Hans was talking about. Red did suggest they bring a couple of costumes just in case there was time to slip them into one of the shows, but nothing was said about a tribute.
Sterling scratched his chin and eyed Flossie. “Do you suppose Red’s up to something?”
She looked at the young magician with a penetrating gaze. “What are you talking about, young man?”
He backed away, stammering, “It is my mistake. I must have been confused. Excuse me. I must check in now.”
“Well, that was strange. Suppose there’s some kinda surprise in store for us?”
Flossie rose from the loveseat and with a slight tug on Waldo’s leash, she said, “I have no idea, but it’s time to take Waldo back to the cabin. My stomach’s growling.”
***
After lunch, Flossie and Sterling resumed their watch in the reception area for another hour. They finally spotted a few of the “youngsters” they knew from the old days. Griselda, the Queen of Darkness was now pushing seventy and her luscious curves had turned into less-than-lovely lumps under her black Goth gown. Her signature spiked heels had been exchanged for pointy-toed flats that revealed bulging bunions. She waved with unbridled enthusiasm when she spotted them. After exclaiming that she was glad to see them still alive, they exchanged a few hugs and she excused herself to check in.
Ten minutes later Sterling felt a clap on the shoulder and turned to look directly into the eyes of Kid Presto. They had last seen him back in the eighties, when Presto was an upstart eighteen year old just breaking into the game. Now, closer to forty, he had grown into a handsome man with an international reputation. “I’ll be damned if it isn’t Sterling Silver and the fabulous Flossie! I heard you’d be on board and couldn’t wait to see you.” He lowered his voice. “Sadly, the last time we met, Harry was still with us. But, alas, in our business the show must go on.” Presto shook Sterling’s hand and drifted toward the desk.
Sterling stood and stretched. “Know what? I’d like to take Waldo for his walk so he can do his business, then rest up till dinner. Whadda ya say?”
“I say I’m all for it, brother-in-law.”
***
After each of them had napped in their respective cabins, the two remaining Scintillating Silvers emerged dressed for dinner. Sterling wore his satin-trimmed tuxedo and Flossie managed to fit herself into a silver lame evening gown accessorized with her silver sequined orthopedic oxfords and two big rhinestone clips for her blue curls.
Flossie pulled a rhinestone collar from her suitcase, affixed a sparkly silver bow and buckled it around the dog’s neck. When Sterling raised an eyebrow at the new bow and collar, Flossie shrugged. “We can’t be the only ones dressed to the nines. After all, Waldo is an important part of our act. He’s a star, and he should dress for dinner, too.”
They entered the dining room and made their way to the Captain’s Table. Red’s eyes lit up at the sight of his mother-in-law’s little party. He rose and pulled out Flossie’s chair. “You two are really something. Wow, look at Waldo. I hope you saw some of your old friends.”
Waldo looked up at the Captain, gave a doggie grin and settled himself at Sterling’s feet.
After dinner, Red went to a small stage at the front of the room and spoke into a microphone. “Welcome to the gathering of some of the finest magicians in the world. For the per-formers and fans alike, I’m sure this will be a memorable cruise. Before the first show in the Seashell Theater, we are going to pay our respects to the notable magicians who left us this year.” He held out the microphone. “I’ll turn the stage over now to your group’s Goodwill Ambassador, Willard the Wonderful.”
A very tall man, at least six foot five, completely dressed in sapphire blue from the hat on his head to the tips of his shoes, stepped up to take center stage. He had a mane of snow white hair and a walrus mustache to match.
“My fellow magicians, it is my great joy to address this gathering. But it is also with great sadness that we contemplate the final disappearing act of several of our colleagues. Before we acknowledge those whom age or illness struck down this year, we must mourn the loss of a beautiful young woman who will be sorely missed in the world of magic. Sheik Ali Kazaam’s lovely assistant Pearl Woo, who died on stage in a horrific freak accident. May our prayers be with this beautiful angel.”
As soon as the words were out of Willard’s mouth, a buzz rippled through the dining room. Heads turned toward Ali Kazaam’s table. Many eyes rested on his new assistant, Jade Moon, as she blushed and covered her face with a large celestial fan.