THE JOURNEY TO THIS novel passed through a lot of darkness, but I’m grateful for the people who fill my life with light and help bring out my best. This work couldn’t have been possible without the ever-present love of my family, friends, and the organizations who took a chance on me and shared their wisdom.
To my agent, Eleanor, who believed in me and guided me through my first contract. To my editor, Harry, who helped me shape the book into its final form.
To the staff, writing community, and others I’ve met through the Institute of American Indian Arts: Derek Palacio, Claire Vaye Watkins, Pam Houston, Chip Livingston, Kim Blaeser, Ramona Ausubel, Marie-Helene Bertino, and many others.
A special thanks to Terese Mailhot, Casey Gray, and Tommy Orange for helping me through this process. No words are enough to express my gratitude.
To Clarion West and the Class of 2018 for the best summer of my life. May our stories be filled with stars and monsters and squids and smut.
To the Octavia E. Butler Society. Thank you for keeping her legacy alive and uplifting diverse voices.
To any teacher or professor whose had the misfortune to try to teach me. I’ve learned a lot, and I swear I’ll turn in my homework one day.
To my professors at Bemidji State University who shaped my understanding of fiction, nonfiction, poetry, and life: Maureen Gibbon, Lauren Cobb, Larry Swain, Mark Christiansen, Jessica Durgan, and Carol Ann Russell.
All current and former staff at Bemidji State Upward Bound Program—Steve Berard, Kelly Steggall, Leah Girard—for believing in me and providing a path to success. My journey through college and to this book started from the steps of Birch Hall. Thank you.
No writing project of mine would be complete without the help of music. I’d like to thank the band Cloud Cult for making beauty out of pain and sharing it with the world.
To my best friend Autumn, who has stuck with me through laughter, tears, college, and late-night trips to Walmart. To Ethan, who more than anybody saw my writing evolution in real time. To Taylor, for always giving honest thoughts and advice on my work.
I’d like to express my love and gratitude to my family, who have always had endless patience for my whims and projects. This book was no different, and I couldn’t be more grateful for everyone’s support throughout the process.
To my sisters, Brittany and Samantha, who always know how to make me laugh.
To my brothers, Dimitri, Anthony, Miles, and Mackensie, who always inspire me to learn more about the world.
To my father, David, who has always worked hard to help everyone.
To my mother, Karen, who encouraged me to read everything I could.
Finally, to Sandy Mills. From the first page to the last, Jacob was never far from my mind while writing this book. Thank you for bringing such an amazing man into this world and keeping his memory alive for all those who loved him, near or far.
Miigwech