Chapter 8
Since Karli had called in sick on her first official day in her new position, she spent her second day moving into her new office and setting up her new accounts. She did everything she could to avoid all work that required coherent thinking. Not even writing could relieve the stressors in her life today. She felt mentally frustrated and physically drained, and at the end of the “workday,” she couldn’t wait to get into her bathtub to relax.
After Karli entered the house, she threw her keys in the key dish, kicked off her heels, and rubbed her forehead as she walked to the kitchen. She had a headache that wouldn’t quit. She searched her purse for the ibuprofen she’d purchased at lunch, popped the top, and downed two tablets with a glass of water. She hung her suit jacket on a chair at the breakfast table and walked into her family room, rubbing her neck.
“Long day, huh?”
Karli nearly jumped out of her skin. She snapped her head up and saw Michael sitting on the sofa in some sweats and a T-shirt. Tears of joy filled her eyes, and she ran to him and nearly knocked him over. She kissed him all about his face.
“Michael! Oh my God! You’re home!” she yelled happily. “I didn’t see your car.”
“It’s in the back. I thought I’d surprise you. Surprise.” He smiled demurely.
She clasped her hands behind his neck and looked him over as if he were a figment of her imagination. She studied his baby-smooth chocolate skin; his neat goatee; his low-cut waves; his deep, sensual brown eyes; and those pearly white teeth.
“Baby, thank you for coming home. I’m so sorry. I love you so much.” Without giving him a chance to respond, she kissed him fervently on the lips and began unbuttoning her blouse. “I’m going to make love to you so fiercely,” she murmured against his lips.
“Karli, wait,” he said with bated breaths.
She pulled back and looked at him, pushing her hair behind her ears.
“As much as I want to do this, I can’t.”
Karli shook her head. “Can’t? Can’t what?” she asked, confused.
Michael nudged her off him, stood up, and began pacing the floor. “Honestly, Karli, I came home because I can’t run from this. I’m just not beat for the BS. I’m still high-strung, emotional, and until I can calm down about this situation, I’m just not ready to deal. I’m staying in our guest bedroom until I’m ready. I just need time.”
Karli stood, upset at his revelation. “So basically, it’s the same as it was when you weren’t here, except you can see my suffering instead.”
“How in the world did this turn into me hurting you or wanting to hurt you? All I’ve done is cater to you! Now that I want space, it’s too much. You created this problem, or did you forget that in all your attempts to justify your wrongdoings?”
Karli’s nose flared. “I never tried to justify anything. I just wanted to explain what happened and why. I own my mistakes. All I want to do is move on with our lives.”
“Well, you owe me time and space so that we can eventually do that, because the entire reason for this is your mistakes.”
Karli threw her head in her hands, trying to hide her frustration and her tears. Smoothing her hands over her hair, she conceded. “Fine. Michael. Do whatever you want to do. Deal with it how you choose. I can’t fight like this anymore. I just can’t. Just let me know what I’m allowed and not allowed to do concerning you.”
Michael only nodded in return, then watched as she ascended the stairs. Once upstairs, Karli ran a bath and cried silent tears as she sat soaking in the tub until the water ran cold. After her ritual of moisturizing her body and face, she put on her short black satin negligee and black satin slippers. At least she could give him something to make him wish he’d changed his mind.
She left the bedroom, fully intending to sashay around in front of his office, but as she approached the room, she found the door closed and heard him working. So much for giving him a tease, she thought. She changed her course and headed to the kitchen, where she saw dishes in the sink from the dinner he’d apparently made for himself. Shaking her head, she rinsed the dishes off and loaded them in the dishwasher.
Not feeling very hungry, she opted for a banana, some veggie sticks, and water for her dinner, then grabbed her laptop bag and headed to her office to get some work done as well. She couldn’t allow her personal life to keep her in limbo, so she took a page out of her husband’s book and worked through her pain. By the time she glanced up at the clock four hours later, it was close to midnight. She rubbed her eyes and yawned before she saved her work and closed her laptop.
Out of a new habit, she got up to check the house and set the alarm. When she came back up the stairs, she and Michael ended up meeting in the hallway.
“I was just checking the locks,” they said simultaneously.
Michael exhaled, and Karli could tell he was turned on. The longing in his eyes betrayed his calm demeanor. Karli raked her fingers through her hair.
“Well, I loaded the dishes. If you want me to cook tomorrow, just leave me a note or something in the morning, before you leave, please,” she said.
Michael nodded and folded his arms. “I can do that.”
The uneasiness between them began to bother Karli, so she cut the meeting in the hallway short. “Well, good night.” She turned and walked into their bedroom without giving him a chance to respond.
Karli said a prayer, then slipped into bed. She made sure her cell was charging and set her alarm clock. Sighing, she pulled up the covers, and soon sleep easily found its way into her tired eyes.
Though sleep came easily, it was turbulent. Karli’s emotions were running rampant, making her extremely restless. Namely, it’d been more than a couple of weeks since she’d felt her husband’s touch, and thoughts of him consumed her. Running her fingertips down her thighs, she began moaning, as the sensation sent tingles through her body. She bit her lip as her hands slowly moved up her thighs to her stomach and finally landed on her breasts. She gasped at the feeling of another set of hands on her body. The hem of her negligee moved upward as feathery kisses trailed from her inner thighs up to the edge of her thong.
“Michael,” she moaned with bated breaths as her back arched from the pleasure.
Strong fingertips glided over her nipples, and she clasped the hands, held them in place. Her body craved him, as if she were an addict suffering from withdrawals. As the kisses continued, her heart filled with love. Her mind drifted over all the memories they had made: the day they met, their first date, the proposal, their wedding. Michael was everything to her. She’d never had a true relationship until Michael. Before him, every guy had been a temporary companion to go to prom with in high school or to catch a movie with in college. Her levelheaded and career-driven ways had made her different from other young women. Though guys had been attracted to her, they’d quickly bored of her; and honestly, she of them and their mannish ways. Until Michael. He had come along and had been a breath of fresh air, and she was still taken with him—the love of her life—to this day.
As the pleasure mounted, she gave in to it, allowing him total access. Suddenly, her eyes fluttered open, and lost between a dream state and reality, she thought she saw Michael on top of her. She quickly wiped her eyes to see if she was indeed dreaming. She wasn’t. Michael was actually in the bed—their bed.
“Michael?” she asked, sleepily turning her head briefly to see the clock. It read 2:25 a.m.
“I’m sorry. You just looked so fine tonight and yesterday, and I’ve been tossing all night. I need some so bad.”
She smiled, caressing his face. “Oh, baby—”
Michael shook his head. “I’m not here to make love to you.”
Cocking her head back out of confusion, she looked at him. Her eyes focused in the dark. He was clearly naked and on top of her, with his hands stuck inside her thong.
“Aren’t you here to make love? Weren’t you just kissing on me?” she asked.
“Kissing on you, yes. Here to make love, no. Karli, what I need right now is just to have some unemotional and unfeeling sex. A release.”
Karli paused and took in what he had said. “Are you . . . are you trying to treat me like a ho? Are you trying to do a ‘hit it and quit it’ on me?”
Michael put his head down. “I’m not treating you like a ho. You’re my wife. This is one of your duties. I just can’t make love to you. I can’t be all lovey dovey and emotional. I just want to get some from you and go back to my room. That’s it. At least I’m not trying to go in the streets for it.”
Karli covered her mouth and shook her head. “Absolutely not! You will not treat me like I’m just here to be your cum catcher. I’m your wife.”
Michael sat back on his knees and looked at her apologetically but sternly. “I’m sorry. That’s all I can offer you. But I need some bad. So honestly, what are we going to do around here?”
“Use your fucking left hand!”
“Been doing that all week.” He moved to get up. “You asked what you can do, and this is it. If not, I can just go back to the guest room. I’m not going to make love to you, because I can’t. Sex is what I need right now. Sex is all I want right now. That’s it.”
It was one thing to be kinky and freaky together in love, but this, this was unfathomable. Karli had never seen this side of Michael. Truly, he was reverting to the man he had told her he used to be before they met. She couldn’t believe that this same man who had vowed to love, honor, and protect her was being so cold and uncaring of her emotions, her heart, and her body. A feeling of betrayal welled up inside her, and she slapped him before she realized what was happening.
“How dare you!” she seethed. “How dare you treat me like this? What I did may have been wrong, but it doesn’t warrant this type of caveman behavior from you. Get out!” she yelled.
Michael’s anger rose. “It’s not caveman. Slapping me like that, that’s caveman behavior. The hell is wrong with you? You care nothing about my feelings for four years, and then you want to complain because I’m choosing to attempt to get sex from my wife? Fine. If I leave, I’m leaving the house, and you better pray to God that Vaseline continues to do the trick.”
He jumped up from the bed and began to put his pajamas back on, and Karli grew frantic. Though she was pissed, she didn’t want to lose the opportunity to make it work. She felt so low and cheap, but if using her would keep him here, then she’d allow it. Well, she prayed that instead he would change his mind or at least simply make love to her. She had faith that he wouldn’t actually go through with this madness. It had to be a test.
That’s it. Just a test to see if I’m willing to do anything to keep him.
She was going to prove him wrong, and in turn, he’d forget this stupid “ho sex” plan and treat her like his wife.
“Okay, Michael.” She swallowed hard and lay back on the bed. Her voice and her hands trembled as she nodded. “Do what you need to do.”
He nodded his head and took a deep breath. After slowly easing back in the bed, he hovered on top of her and quickly removed her thong. He leaned over and took the K-Y Jelly out of the nightstand drawer, then slicked his manhood, opened her legs, and slid inside. He lay pressed tightly against her as he barbarically pumped and grunted, with his face almost buried in the pillows. Karli held in her cries as hot tears slid out of her eyes while her husband had his way with her without any regard to her pain. She couldn’t believe that he was actually going through with this. In that moment, her heart shattered.
Panting, he sat up and, without warning, flipped her onto her stomach, stretched her out, and entered her kitty from behind. Karli just lay there as he rammed her and then, with the roar of a lion, released deep inside her. She continued to lie there as he got out of the bed and went into their bathroom to clean himself. When he returned, Karli was lying in a fetal position. He didn’t even bother to clean her up or check on her. She heard him slip on his pajamas before he leaned over, kissed the top of her head, and nonchalantly said, “Thanks. Good night.” The next thing she heard was the bedroom door closing.
Karli lay there, feeling sore, violated, used, cheap, unwanted, and completely unloved. She’d suffered severely from her mistake. Now, thinking over her marriage, all she felt was numbness. She was so tired that her eyes eventually closed, but nothing could shut out the pain that racked her heart.