It was cold on top of the ridge, but not enough for Laurie to regret the impulse that had led her to saddle Roxanne and take her out for a ride. Here, with the wind against her face, she could free herself from the claustrophobia of chat rooms, shake off the lingering smell of nail-varnish remover, and acknowledge her stupidity. It made her so angry – with herself as much as anything. There was only one person who could have known all those details about her: one person, whom she had been preparing herself to love, but who had really wanted her dead. How could she have been so blind? She thought back through the events of the last few weeks, of Dad’s attempts to question her, of her own wilful nonchalance. She’d been so keen to keep Paul to herself that she could have got them all killed. She very nearly had. She’d been an idiot.
It was only when she saw Roxanne’s ears twitch in front of her that Laurie realised she’d said the last word out loud. ‘Idiot!’ She said it again, relishing the ‘D’ and stronger percussion on the ‘T’. It was a good word – cathartic. ‘IDIOT!’ A flock of starlings took off from a nearby rowan. Roxanne shook her head, as if to laugh at this latest antic from the woman on her back.
What the hell? Why not? There was nobody around for miles. ‘IDIOT!!!’ This time Laurie really let rip. Did she imagine the echo coming back to her, or were her ears still ringing from the force of the shout combined with the residual pain from whatever it was that skewer had done? Now Laurie was the one who shook her head. She’d been going to take Roxanne for a gallop, but that was good enough. Why should she take any more risks? With the faintest tug on the reins and nudge of the knee she wheeled the horse back round; they headed for home.
Coming back along the lane proved to be a mistake. Mrs Shilling was out there, apparently weeding the front flower bed, although as far as Laurie could see it was already immaculate.
‘Hello dear! So that was you. I thought it was someone calling a dog, but it sounded like you and I thought, well I said to James in fact, “Lauren hasn’t got a dog, has she?” But he said you’d be back in London by now.’ Mrs Shilling paused in full flow – a rare occurrence – she was clearly waiting for some kind of response.
Laurie really hadn’t the strength for explanations but threw out a titbit that she hoped would prove enough. ‘It’s not very busy at this time of year. I thought I’d take advantage of the weather and make a proper holiday of it.’
‘Lucky you. Well, it must be nice to be here for a bit longer. Your father and Jess are back, by the way. Drove past only a few minutes ago. Just went away for the night, did they? I must say it’s nice to see him with someone at last.’
Another pause: Laurie did not know whether to laugh at Mrs Shilling for getting the wrong end of the stick quite so wonderfully, or object to the way she had so clearly engineered this meeting purely to recharge her gossip banks. Oh well, there was probably no harm in spreading a bit of misinformation, better that than have to explain exactly what Dad and Jess had been doing the previous night. ‘Yes, she’s lovely isn’t she? Early days of course, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed.’ Was that enough to satisfy Mrs Shilling’s prurience? Who cared? Laurie squeezed her knees together, gave a cheery wave, and continued towards home.
Forewarned, Laurie was not surprised to see the Fiesta in the yard. She dismounted and tied Roxanne to the grooming ring just as Dad came out from the house. When he saw Laurie he did nothing but smile and spread his arms. God, it was good to be hugged by him.
But Laurie also needed explanations. ‘What’s going on, Dad? Why aren’t the police here? Why did you tell me to clean up the house?’
‘You did a good job, darling.’ Laurie had never thought of Dad as shifty before, but he was clearly uncomfortable as he tried to come up with an answer to her question. ‘It seemed the right thing to do. The state those bodies were in: well, that would have required some explaining. Jess …’ Dad was struggling for words now. ‘Well, Jess was quite definite. She told me about those men and what they’d done to her before.’ He paused to compose himself. Laurie had last seen him this close to crying at Mum’s funeral. ‘That was bad enough for her. She really, really didn’t want to tell it to the police. To tell the truth, after what she had just done for us, I thought that helping her – well, that was the least I could do.’
Laurie considered this, remembering the way Jess had already started disposing of the bodies before freeing herself and Dad from the table. She tried to imagine the whispered conversations that must have taken place while she slept – what ‘helping’ Jess had actually entailed. Surely it wasn’t that easy just to dispose of two bodies? A look at Dad’s face, however, convinced her that now was not the time for further questions. Instead, she tried lightening his mood. ‘Where’s Jess?’ Then, smiling, ‘You know Mrs Shilling’s convinced you’re an item?’
‘An item?’ Dad sounded puzzled. ‘Oh, you mean …’ His voice trailed off before continuing, ‘She’s upstairs, having a shower. I’m going to do the same. Then we can talk.’