“Just say what you want to say,” Jameson said.
Luna sucked in some air, because how did one eat humble pie without making a bigger mess? She put a hand to her chest. “Give me a minute. My heart’s pounding and I’m sweating in places I shouldn’t be sweating.”
Jameson’s eyes softened very slightly. He seemed braced, and she couldn’t blame him. He also looked hot as hell in another pair of jeans, an actual T-shirt, one of their own, which melted her heart. So did the way he was looking at her like maybe she meant a whole lot to him.
“Since when are you afraid to tell me something?” he asked.
“I’m not. I’m just so nervous I might throw up.” She paused, then quickly said, “I mean, not the kind of throwing up Willow’s doing. I’m not pregnant or anything.”
He smiled. “You ramble when you’re nervous.”
“Always.” She looked into his face and Stella’s words flooded back to her. Sometimes what we need the most is the one thing we keep pushing away because we’re afraid. “I’m trying to work on myself to be better,” she said. “But it’s a steep learning curve. The simple truth is, I’m sorry. For a lot of things.” She drew a big breath for courage while he stood there waiting with warm, curious, patient eyes. Okay, well, here went . . . everything. “I thought I hated quesadillas because sometimes they have peppers in them,” she said. “But you don’t use peppers, because as it turns out, you don’t like them either, so there’s that.”
He smiled, but also looked a little confused by the direction of this conversation.
“Another thing is that I like to be the big spoon,” she said. “Also, I don’t like it when the blankets on the bed are loose so my foot sticks out. My feet have to be covered so the monsters under the bed can’t eat my toes.”
He smiled. He already knew this. “You’re trying to tell me something.”
“Yes.” She drew another deep breath. “Sushi used to be my favorite food until I got food poisoning last year and threw up for three days. And I don’t understand why people like roller coasters.” She racked her brain for more. “Oh! In the third grade I cheated on a spelling bee off Brian McDonald and when I got caught, I blamed it on him.”
“You’re opening up without being pressed to do so,” he said softly, looking incredibly touched. “You’re opening up willingly . . . to me.”
“Trying anyway.” She took a beat to breathe. “Jameson, you are a part of this family. An important part, and I’m sorry I ever let you think otherwise. You’re . . . family.” She paused. “But to be clear, not the kind of family I can’t sleep with, because I’d really like to go back to sleeping with you.” She paused. “The inappropriate kind of sleeping, in case I wasn’t clear. I know I told you I was done, but that was a lie. I’d talked myself into believing I didn’t deserve you. I don’t know why exactly, except maybe it’s because growing up, I felt I had to . . . I don’t know . . . conform, I guess, in order to be loved.”
He stepped closer to her, his eyes both soft and fierce. “No one should have to change who they are to be loved.”
She waved a hand in front of her face while simultaneously staring up at the ceiling. “I’m going to cry. And I really, really, really hate crying. The truth is, I want you to crowd my space and be all up in it. I’m so sorry I screwed us up so spectacularly. It wasn’t until after you said I never opened up to you that I realized you might be a little right.”
He smiled. “Just a little?”
Her smile was rueful. “Okay, a lot right. Don’t get used to that.”
“This isn’t a contest. We can both be wrong.” He leaned in to kiss her, but she put a hand to his chest.
“Wait,” she said. “There’s more.”
He gave a gallant head bow and a hand gesture for her to continue.
She put a hand to her pounding heart to keep it inside her chest. “The very first guy I was ever with . . . it turned out that he only slept with me because of a dare.”
He sucked in a breath and whispered her name as he again reached for her, but she held up a hand. “I have to say this, Jameson. All of it. As you know, my first real relationship, and the first man I ever loved, turned out to be gay. There was someone after that, but he doesn’t deserve a mention. The second man I fell in love with . . . he kept something from me, something big.”
He went still as stone. “Luna—”
“A secret that was his right to keep. And yes, I hid myself from you because the truth is, I’ve never lived up to expectations. And no matter how hard I try, I’m never quite enough—”
“I’m going to stop you right there,” he said, tipping her face up to his.
“But maybe I have more deep, dark secrets—”
“I don’t care. Because you are enough, Luna. You’re more than enough, you’re . . .”
She cocked a brow. “Don’t even try to say ‘perfect.’”
“I was going to say the most amazing pain in my ass I’ve ever met. Is that okay?”
She had to laugh. “No one’s ever told me that.”
“That you’re a pain in the ass?”
She rolled her eyes, but a very small smile curved her mouth. “You know what I mean.”
Stepping into her, he slid his hands up her arms to cup her face. “Let me repeat myself. You’re enough, you’re more than enough, you’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.” His face was so serious, so intense as he looked down at her. “Now it’s my turn to tell you some things you should know. I love your courage. I love how you light up a room when you walk into it. I love the way you’d do anything for your friends and family. I love how your eyes flash when you know someone’s bullshitting you. I love seeing your face first thing in the morning, your hair all crazy beautiful.”
She tried to look away, but he held on to her. “I love the way you think, and the way you refuse to compromise the things that are important to you. I love the way I feel when I’m with you.”
She just stared at him, shocked at his list, its length, and the way he said it all with genuine emotion.
“Luna, you’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.”
She must’ve looked like maybe her brain couldn’t upload that, because he said it again, his mouth brushing against her ear. And then again against her mouth this time, kissing her like his life depended on it, and hell, she was pretty sure hers did as well. “I love you, Jameson. So much.” The words slipped out naturally and without thought.
His eyes closed for a quick beat, then opened again, revealing surprise, affection, and . . . a much deeper emotion. “Luna, when I look into your eyes, I finally, for as long as I’m holding you, feel peace. Refuge. A sense of home.” He dropped his forehead to hers. “I love you so very much, and have since you walked into my life and told me you didn’t date suits.”
She nearly collapsed with relief. “You know you’re crazy to love me, right?”
He grinned. “Maybe I’m just crazy for you.”
Marveling at that, she shook her head. “So what does it all mean?”
“That’s easy, honey . . .” This from Stella, who clearly had decided not to leave. “It means your auras are intertwined and the universe is in favor of this joining and merging of souls.”
“Gram, you’re going to make him go screaming into the night.”
Instead, he pulled her into him. “I’m tired of taking things apart and leaving. I want to stay, but I think there should be a change.”
Her heart skipped a beat. “A change?”
“I take it you haven’t checked your email yet today.”
She shook her head, confused. “No time. Why?”
“Check it now.”
She pulled out her phone and waited for her emails to download. One of them was from Silas’s attorney. She opened it, then her heart skipped another beat as she lifted her face to Jameson’s. “You signed over your fifty percent ownership to me?” She took a breath, then shook her head. This couldn’t be real. “You signed over your fifty percent to me?”
He smiled. “One hundred percent looks good on you.”
She shook her head again, feeling sick. “Jameson, I can’t let you do this. You deserve half—”
“I don’t need it. I know I belong here, with or without ownership. It doesn’t change anything for me, Luna. I still have an emotional stake in this place. And you.”
“I don’t know what to say . . .” She lifted her face to his, knowing her eyes were shiny with unshed tears. “Jameson—”
“Say I can stay,” he said softly. “With you.”
Head spinning, she nodded. “I was really hoping you were going to say that, because . . .” She bit her lower lip, nervous all over again. “There’s one more thing I need to tell you. Actually, show you.” And with that, she opened the closet door—which was no longer a walk-in storage closet. She’d stayed up late clearing it out completely. All the shelves and all the things that had been on the shelves were gone. So was the layer of dust, the holiday decorations—including a life-size Easter Bunny. She’d removed everything and painted the walls white—the only paint she’d been able to find on-site, but it made the space seem bigger. She’d left the small window open to vent out the fumes and had rush-ordered a desk and chair, still in their boxes. The only other thing in the room was a key ring lying in the middle of the desk.
Jameson looked at her, then moved to the desk and picked up the key ring. It was brass letters that spelled HOME, and held two keys.
“One’s to the door of your new office,” she said. “The other’s to my place. Which I think of as our place. Hence the key.” She waited until he looked at her. “There’s space for you here, Jameson. You truly belong here, with us. It’s your home too, and I’m sorry I ever let you think otherwise.”
He gave her his crooked smile. “Is this a romantic gesture, or do you just want me to keep doing the books?”
With a laugh, she wrapped her arms around him and planted a hell of a kiss on his lips. “Actually, I have a list of things I want you to keep doing, but the books is at the very bottom.”
He grinned. “Well, you know how I love a good list. Maybe we should get started.”
“Do you think they’re talking about sex?” Chef asked Milo.
Milo shrugged. “I didn’t know old people could still do it.”
“Seriously,” Luna yelled back to him. “I’m only three years older than you! And I asked you all to leave!”
“Can we make a list?” Shayne asked Willow, sounding hopeful.
“I’m still in the middle of the consequences from the last list we had,” Willow said.
Stella came to Luna and Jameson and hugged them tight. “I’m so happy for you both. And for me too, since when you decide to get married, I’ll be the officiant and all. Don’t worry, my charge for the services will reflect how much I love you. Four figures tops.”
“Gram,” Luna said. “We’re not engaged.”
“But you will be, someday.”
Luna looked at Jameson, seeming horrified that her grandma was putting them on the spot, but he just smiled. “Yes,” he said, never taking his eyes off her. “Someday. When she’s ready.”
Stella whooped with glee. “I knew it. And four figures is a deal, you know. You might want to lock me in.”
Luna shook her head, but also laughed. “No fee and I’ll buy you a new dress.”
“Sold,” Stella said, and winked at Jameson. “You may now kiss your bri—”
“Girlfriend,” Luna corrected.
Jameson smiled into her eyes. “Don’t mind if I do.”
And then to Luna’s delight, he did just that, and their deal was sealed.