| |
––––––––
“YOU KNOW I CAN’T STAY out too late, Jake. I promised Gracie.”
“Don’t worry, little brother. I’ll make sure you get to the church on time.”
Jake hooked his arm around Matt’s neck, steering his reluctant brother through the entrance to the Stumble Inn. “We’ll just have a couple of drinks and go. Trust me.”
“MATT!”
The raucous greeting came from the group of guys gathered in the back area of the bar that was reserved for large parties. Everyone raised their beer bottle to the rafters in a rousing salute to the surprised guest of honor.
“I’m going to get you for this,” Matt said with an elbow dig to Jake’s ribs. But he was grinning from ear to ear.
Ethan and Nate moved forward, joined by Matt’s old high school buddy, Josh, who shoved a beer into the groom’s hand. “It’s your last night of freedom, man,” Josh teased. “Enjoy it while you can.”
“The first of the Lancaster sons to get married,” Ethan said with a laugh. “Did you really think we weren’t going to throw a bachelor party for you?”
One by one, Matt’s friends stepped forward to shake his hand, give him a bear hug, or pound his back. Even those who hadn’t been formally invited to the gathering called out greetings and congratulations from every corner of the crowded barroom. Situated a few miles west of town, the Stumble Inn was popular with the farmers and dairymen who lived and worked in the area; Matt was well-known and liked.
Jake nodded towards a few guys from his construction crew who were sitting at the bar. They nodded back. Briefly, he thought about inviting them to the party. That was something the Jake he’d been seven months ago would’ve done. He was aware that he was no longer the affable and charming guy he’d once been.
Frankly, he didn’t know what Darlene found attractive about him. She’d be coming to the wedding tomorrow. He imagined how Annie would react when she met Darlene. She’d probably smile that cool, fake little smile of hers and play the sophisticated city girl.
Damn. It was happening again. He had to stop thinking about Annie. He had to push down the gut-wrenching memories that jumped out to assault him at every turn. He forced his dark thoughts aside, hiding his grimace with a casual smile as he sat down at a small table beside his brother.
A round of drinks was ordered. Baskets of buffalo wings, fries and nachos were placed at each table. Toasts were made, many of them the off-color kind that wouldn’t have been appropriate at last night’s rehearsal dinner. Jake joined Ethan, Nate, Josh and Matt in a round of whiskey shots. Then he ordered another.
Mindful of his duties as Best Man and designated driver, he nursed the second drink, sitting quietly while the conversations around him became increasingly loud and boisterous.
Matt was the life of the party, as usual, and he had everyone roaring at his jokes. The initial gathering of twenty men grew larger in number as the evening progressed. Drinks flowed as freely as the laughter. Country music blared from the jukebox, and a few couples danced on the small parquet floor in the main room of the bar.
As generally happened when men gathered at events such as this, the talk centered around that vital topic they enjoyed discussing when women weren’t in the immediate vicinity: women. Jake eventually found himself lured into the conversation when Josh asked Nate who he was bringing to the wedding.
“Her name’s Mimi,” Ethan replied before Nate could open his mouth. “She’s a redhead.”
All the guys hovering around their table gave Nate an envious look. He looked pleased with himself. “Not only is she a gorgeous redhead, she also happens to be very smart. She’s studying to be a nurse.”
“Oh,” Josh said, sounding less interested. “You’d better be careful then. It’s the smart ones who trap you.”
Nate looked as though he wouldn’t mind being ensnared by Mimi.
Josh turned to Jake. “You bringing Darlene Wilson?”
Jake nodded.
Nate shook his head with disbelief. “I just can’t picture the two of you together. She’s pretty, but I remember her being kind of a snob back when I was dating her sister.”
“She isn’t a snob,” Jake answered quietly. “She’s actually very shy.”
“Is it true what Matt said the other night?” Nate wanted to know. “That you’re engaged to her?”
“I said practically engaged,” Matt corrected wryly. “And I nearly got my nose broken for saying it.”
“Why did you say it then?” Ethan asked.
Jake gave his brother a warning look, but Matt was already two beers and a whisky deep in the early stages of inebriation. “To see how Annie would react. Did you see how white her face got?”
“She spilled her glass of wine,” Ethan observed coldly.
Nate glowered at Matt. “Why would you want to hurt our sister when she’s hurting already? Anyone can see she’s upset because her fiancé didn’t come with her.”
“Man, are you dense,” his brother rebuked. “Didn’t you see she’s not wearing an engagement ring anymore? I’m pretty sure they’ve broken up. And just in time, because I was ready to go to New York to break that man’s nose and drag my little sister home.” He narrowed his gaze on Jake. “Do you know anything about what happened?”
Jake felt the blood draining from his face. His hands balled into fists. “No,” he bit out. “She didn’t say anything to me about a broken engagement.”
In fact, she’d given him the impression that she and Maxwell were still very much together. If she’d been lying to him...
“You okay, Jake?” Josh asked. “You look like you want to tear the bar down.”
“You should be happy she’s not marrying him,” Ethan continued mercilessly.
“You don’t know that for sure,” Jake seethed, ready to explode out of his chair and wipe that accusatory look off of Ethan’s face. Why did it seem everyone was acting as if he were to blame for Annie’s current state?
“I’m her brother. I’ve been worrying about her ever since I saw her at my wedding.” Then Ethan sighed audibly, lifting his hand in a conciliatory gesture. “I know she hurt you, Jake. But I think you’ve been blinded by your own stubborn misery to see what’s really going on.”
Josh looked from Jake to Ethan and back again. “You and Annie McAllister, huh? That makes sense. The two of you always were pretty tight.”
“We used to be,” Jake said unwillingly. He tossed back the last of his whiskey, drawing on the remnants of his control to not order another.
“So, what happened?” Josh wanted to know, seemingly oblivious to the tension hanging over the table.
“She was fine two years ago when we all went to New York for her graduation,” Nate reflected. “I remember her telling me that she’d finally sold one of her pieces. She was excited about working in an art gallery.” He made a rueful face. “None of us knew that it was Maxwell’s gallery.”
“She always said that she’d come home right after graduation,” Ethan added. “That’s probably when things started heading south. Right, Jake?”
A promise broken, Jake thought. The first of many.
“I noticed something was off at Grandpa’s funeral,” Nate said. “I mean, his death wasn’t totally unexpected. She seemed to be in a state of shock that was way out of proportion, I thought.”
“They were always very close,” Matt observed. “Gracie told me that Annie was your grandfather’s favorite.”
“She felt like she’d been a disappointment to him,” Jake explained curtly. “She put an impossible amount of pressure on herself, wanting to do the things he never had.”
“What happened when you went to visit her a couple months after his funeral?” Ethan asked. “You never said.”
Jake hesitated. He didn’t want to go back to that day. Didn’t want to see the way she’d looked at him when she’d assured him that everything was fine, that she would be coming home very soon. “I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told her that your grandfather didn’t care about her fulfilling his dreams. He just wanted her to be happy. I thought, after she’d recovered a bit from the funeral, that she’d see some reason. I told her it was time for her to come home.”
“Told,” Ethan said with another sigh, shaking his head. “You of anyone, Jake, should know you never tell our sister what to do.”
“Jeez, this conversation is getting depressing,” Josh muttered.
“Hey, guys, check out that blonde in the red dress,” someone else said.
The men glanced towards the dance floor where a curvy blonde in a scarlet dress was doing a bouncing two-step with a happy cowboy.
Jake stared into his empty glass, unaware of everything around him until Ethan nudged his elbow. “So, what’re you going to do?” his friend asked quietly.
“Do?”
“You know she loves you.”
“Do I?”
“Come on, man. Don’t play dumb.”
Jake gave Ethan a look. “I’m with Darlene now.”
“For real? That isn’t just some form of retaliation?”
“I like her,” Jake insisted. “She’s a sweet girl.”
“And as different from my sister as night and day.”
“That’s a good thing. You know Annie and I were always butting heads.”
“Not always.” Ethan flashed a quick grin. “I remember all the long letters she wrote to you from San Diego when we were kids. She spent hours on those, which, when I think about it, was pretty amazing. She never liked sitting still for long unless she was painting. But she sat at our kitchen table for hours and yelled at me and Nate to get lost if we bothered her.” He laughed a little. “She hated being so far away from you. She was always asking our mom and dad when summer would get here.”
Jake’s reluctant laugh held a thin trace of remorse. “She’d send me drawings too. I threw them all away seven months ago.”
“Wow. That’s harsh.”
“She broke her promises. Every single one.” He shook his head angrily, his voice laced with self-derision as he added, “Listen to me, I sound like a teenage girl. It’s pathetic.”
“It doesn’t have to be this way. Forgive her. Take her back. She loves you.”
“No.”
“Fine. Be a stubborn ass. At least try and be kind to her? You’re both making it difficult for the rest of us with this battle going on between you.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be as civil towards her as I can.” He shrugged. “She’s only here for one more day, anyway.”
***
“ISN’T THIS THE MOST perfect day for a wedding? Look at that sky, would you? Just look at it! Blue as a robin’s egg. Oh, Annie, I’m so ridiculously happy. What time is it? Only eleven? Jake had better get Matt to the church on time. Mom said Nate didn’t get back until almost two o’clock this morning.”
“I know. I heard him. Gracie, sit down before you hyperventilate. No, before I hyperventilate.”
Annie snagged her cousin’s hand and tugged her over to the velvet-cushioned bench in front of the vanity, one of the few vacant spots remaining in the room. Underwear, hosiery, and tissue paper were scattered everywhere; hat boxes, makeup, luggage, shoes and jewelry added to the chaos. The bride herself was picture perfect from the neck up; the rest of her was swathed in a pink bathrobe.
“How’s my hair? Didn’t your mom do a great job?” Gracie admired herself in the mirror. Her reflection was joined by Annie’s as the cousins wiggled close together on the small bench, just like they’d done when they were teenagers.
“Oh, Annie,” Gracie whispered. “I can’t believe this day is finally here. In less than three hours, I’ll be Mrs. Matthew Lancaster. God, I love him so much.” Her eyes started to fill.
“Don’t,” Annie warned. “You’ll smear your mascara.”
Her cousin giggled. “At least it’s waterproof. I made sure that my mom’s is too. She’s been doing enough crying for all of us.”
“Why do people cry at weddings anyway?” Annie mused.
Gracie clutched Annie’s hand and pressed it to her chest. “I’m going to cry at your wedding. I won’t be able to help it.”
“My wedding? Don’t be ridiculous. I’ll never marry.”
“Yes, you will,” Gracie said with certainty.
“And who’ll be the groom? If you think Jake and I will get back together, you can forget it. He despises me.”
“Don’t be obtuse. If that guy didn’t love you so much, do you think he’d be behaving the way he has? He cares too much. That’s why he’s so cold. But I see the way he watches you.”
Annie frowned. “He watches me with hostility. I hurt him Gracie. I hurt him bad. And now he’s paying it back. He’s hurting me. That’s not love.”
“So, do you hate him then?”
She was startled by the question. “No,” she answered with soft conviction. “I could never hate him.” She stood up and went to the window. “Honestly, I don’t know what I feel anymore. Everything’s just kind of empty inside.”
Her cousin was quiet for a while before eventually saying, “You should’ve seen him right after Ethan and Jessica’s wedding. I don’t know what the two of you said to each other, and you don’t have to tell me. But it was like a stone had rolled over his heart. He used to be so sweet and fun. Easygoing, you know? I tried talking to him a couple of times when I was visiting Matt, but he wouldn’t tell me anything. He locked us all out. He’s buried himself in his work. Matt says that Jake usually puts in eighty hours a week. He stays at the job sites and keeps working after his crew’s left. He was pretty much running everything on his own the first year, you know. I’m glad he’s finally got more people working for him, but he still hasn’t let up on his schedule.”
Annie rested her forehead against the windowpane and closed her eyes. “He likes working hard. He loves his job.”
“No. I don’t think so. At least, I don’t think he loves it anymore. He’s driven, that’s for sure. But his heart isn’t in it. Matt says that if Jake isn’t careful, he’s going to run himself into the ground.”
“That’s his choice,” Annie replied, her voice cracking a little. “There’s nothing I can do about it.”
Gracie came to stand beside her. “You have to talk to him. Both of you need to let go of your stubborn pride and be friends again, if nothing else.”
“I do want that,” Annie whispered. “More than anything on earth. But I think it’s too late.”
Aunt Jean flurried into the room. “Jessica and Lindy are here. And the photographer too. Girls, you’re not dressed yet? Oh, Gracie. I still can’t believe my baby girl is getting married. Quick, give me a tissue. I think I’m going to cry.”
***
JAKE STOOD BESIDE THE first wood pew, hands clasped in front of him, head angled towards the church entrance as he waited for her to appear. First Jessica and then Lindy had already paraded up the aisle to join Ethan and Nate before the altar.
The scent of pink roses, fresh-cut that morning from Zelda’s garden, intermingled with the fainter smells of candlewax and incense. Early afternoon sunlight cut through the stained-glass window above the choir loft where Tilly Brooks played Pachelbel’s Canon in D on the pipe organ.
And there she was, standing in the doorway, seeming to hesitate for a moment before making her way up the aisle towards him.
She was beautiful. The peach color of her dress brought some color to her pale complexion and softened the sharp angles of her too-thin frame. She looked as fragile as a butterfly’s wings. Ignoring Gracie’s precise instructions, he strode down the aisle to meet her sooner than he should have. He placed her hand on his arm and clasped it tightly within his before escorting her to the altar.
Her hand was like ice. Her body was tense. She kept her gaze straight ahead.
When they reached the other members of the wedding party, he released her hand and stood to the side, directly opposite her. He met her wide green eyes briefly and noted her strained look. She’d better make it through this ceremony, he thought grimly.
These impulsive urges to cradle and protect her were unfamiliar to him. Annie had always been so strong, armoring her petite frame with her self-assured, fearless personality. A tomboy at her core, she’d never backed down from a fight. Where was that girl who’d climbed trees and wrestled with the boys and run through the fields with boundless, indestructible joy?
For the thousandth time, he berated himself for accepting her calm reassurances that cold November day a year and a half ago when he’d come to see her in New York. He should’ve listened to his gut. He should’ve tossed her over his shoulder and carried her out of that gallery, heedless of her protests.
What a fool he’d been. And, if what Ethan had said last night was true, she was still playing him for a fool, making him believe that she was still engaged to Maxwell Fischer. Today, he’d find out if she’d been lying to him.
The organ music swelled and a trumpet sounded, yanking him out of his dark thoughts. Gracie was floating up the aisle in a fluffy white cloud of a dress, her hand tucked in her father’s arm.
“W-wow,” Matt stuttered.
Jake couldn’t help but smile. Gracie looked gorgeous and very much in love. His brother couldn’t have chosen a more suitable bride.
The ceremony was amazingly brief, considering all of the preparation that had gone into it. Everything went as perfectly as Gracie had wanted. At the appropriate moment, Jake retrieved the bride’s ring from his trouser pocket and handed it to Father Craig. Then he suppressed a sigh of relief, glad that his duty was done. As he stepped away from the couple, his gaze was reluctantly drawn to Annie. She was rubbing her hand across her forehead. Her eyes were downcast and her smile seemed forced.
Come on, Annie, he silently urged. Keep it together.
Was she wishing that it was her own wedding day? If she and Maxwell had, in fact, broken up, was she unhappy about it? Had it been her choice to end the engagement? Or Maxwell’s?
Her fascination with that man had been evident the first time Jake had seen them together. Stupidly, at the time, he’d assumed it’d merely been the man’s power and influence in the art world that had intrigued her. Besides, the man was at least twenty years older than her. Maxwell had made a point to praise Annie’s work in Jake’s presence. Jake remembered how she’d basked under the man’s deliberate flattery. She’d assured Jake that Maxwell was only a friend, that he was helping her make the right connections. Just a few more months, she’d said. A year, tops, and I’ll come back to California. He’d been so confident of Annie’s unfaltering love that he’d ignored his gut feelings.
Ethan and Zelda insisted that she still loved him. He didn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe it. If she’d ever really loved him, she wouldn’t have lied to him. She wouldn’t have shattered the precious bond of trust that had always been between them. He’d entrusted her with his heart, shared his deepest secrets and desires with her. And she’d thrown that all away in her obstinate pursuit of success.
“I now present to you Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Lancaster.”
Father Craig’s booming voice shook Jake from his reverie. He joined in the applause, then reached out to shake his brother’s hand before the newlyweds walked down the aisle to the accompaniment of organ and trumpet.
Annie took his arm, and they followed the beaming couple out of the church and then around the side of the building to where they were to wait before returning inside for a photo session.
Without speaking a word, Annie let go of his arm and went over to hug her cousin and Matt. Everyone agreed with Gracie that the ceremony had been perfect, and, yes, her new husband looked very handsome. Then the photographer waved them all back into the church and proceeded to pose them in front of the altar. The entire family first, then the wedding party, then just the bride and groom.
Jake found himself holding his breath every time he was told to put his arm around Annie’s waist or stand close beside or behind her. When the photographer informed everyone that only the bride and groom needed to stay for a few more shots, Annie silently slipped out a side door.
Jake followed her.
She wandered into a tiny courtyard that was surrounded by flowerbeds. A stone bench stood beside a water fountain. She sat down on the bench, an audible sigh of weariness escaping her lips.
“Tired?” he asked in a placid voice.
She glanced up with a startled gasp. “Oh! I didn’t know anyone had followed me.” She held his gaze for a brief, searching moment before lowering her head. “Yes. I’m tired. I didn’t get much sleep last night, and Gracie woke me up at seven.”
He buried his clenched hands in his pockets. “Gracie looked beautiful coming up that aisle,” he observed casually. “For a second there, I thought Matt was going to faint.”
“That would’ve been a sight to see.”
“Matt and Gracie Lancaster. It has a nice ring to it.”
“Yes. It does.”
A hummingbird flitted into the spray from the water fountain. Jake watched it for a moment before returning his gaze to Annie’s bowed head. Her long hair was pulled away from her face in a pretty knot, the rest of it flowing down her back.
His hands clenched tighter. “I heard a rumor last night. I need you to tell me if it’s true.”
She presented a composed face to him. “Oh?”
“Are you still engaged to Maxwell?”
What little color there’d been in her cheeks was washed away. She closed her eyes briefly before giving him a frank stare. “Who told you?”
“So, it’s true.”
“Who told you?”
“The only thing that matters is that you didn’t.”
“You never gave me a chance.”
“Bull. You had plenty of chances. But, as usual, you just do what you want. How come I never realized how selfish you are until it was too late?”
“That’s not fair. You don’t know what I’ve been going through.”
“And why is that, Annie? Hmm? Because you stopped sharing things with me? Stopped confiding in me?”
“If you’d just let me explain—”
“Jake?”
He expelled a harsh breath, forcing his features into a calm expression as he turned around to greet the woman who’d entered the courtyard. “Hi, Darlene.”
“Is everything all right?” Darlene asked in a timid voice, her gaze looking past him to where Annie sat on the bench.
Now wasn’t the time for introductions. “Everything’s fine. Have you been waiting for me? Sorry about that.” Without looking back at Annie, he said, “Thanks for the chat, Annie. See you at the reception.”
***
SHE WAS SUCH A fool! All that candlelight and music and the sweetly spoken marriage vows had made her feel, for just a little while, that everything was going to be all right. At first, when Jake had surprised her in the courtyard, he’d seemed to be handing her an olive branch. He’d been civil to her, almost nice. And then he asked her if the rumor was true.
Who’d told him? She’d wanted to tell him herself when the time was right. Stupid. So stupid. He was right. She should’ve told him immediately. Now things would be even worse between them if that were possible.
And that woman who’d interrupted them must’ve been Darlene Wilson. His girlfriend. The one he was “practically engaged” to. She was fresh and pretty and so obviously shy. Annie let go of the thin hope she’d only just realized she’d been clinging to since Darlene’s name had first been mentioned. Darlene wasn’t some kind of payback for Annie’s perfidy. Jake would never use a woman like that, especially one so clearly as nice as Darlene. His relationship with the younger woman appeared to be the real deal.
Of course, it stood to reason that Jake would fall for someone like Darlene. She was the complete opposite of Annie: sweet and pliable. He wouldn’t want to make the same mistake twice, after all.
The photo session was over. Annie heard her father calling her name from the church steps. She made her way to the church entrance, spying her parents’ car, her father standing alongside it beckoning to her. Chin high, she walked down the steps and got into the back seat.
“Everything all right?” her mother asked, sending Annie a worried look from the front seat.
Annie averted her eyes. “Yes. Wasn’t that a beautiful ceremony?” She lost herself to her troubled thoughts, murmuring nothings to her mother’s idle chatter as her father drove them back to the farm.
The field that had been set aside for parking was filling rapidly. Guests mingled at the edges of the dance floor while catering staff offered food and drinks. Hot club jazz music—Gracie’s favorite genre—played lightly in the background.
Annie ignored all of this as she practically leapt out of the car the second her father pulled to a stop in front of her grandmother’s house. She mumbled something about having to use the bathroom before dashing into the house.
Instead of going to her bedroom, she went to Gracie’s room at the end of the hall. It overlooked the front yard.
Jake and Darlene hadn’t been too far behind her parents’ car. There was his truck now, pulling into a space near the barn. He’d washed and polished it, she noticed. He opened Darlene’s door, taking her hand, continuing to hold it as they approached the first cluster of guests. He retrieved two glasses from a passing tray, handed one to her before clicking his glass against it. They shared a smile as they sipped the champagne.
His head tilted back. Everything about him stood out in sharp detail: the arch of his tanned neck, the clean, smooth line of his jaw, the glint of sunlight on his black hair. And his eyes, their silvery-blue depths startling even from this distance, seeming to stare directly at Annie through the bedroom window.
She took a jerking step back from the window. This was a nightmare. There was no way she could go out there and face everyone, knowing they’d all be watching her for her reaction to Jake and Darlene.
“There you are,” Lindy said from the doorway, Jessica behind her. “We saw you running into the house. Everything okay?”
“Not exactly,” Annie mumbled, refusing to break down in front of the two women for a second time.
“You don’t have to go out there if you don’t want to,” Jessica soothed. “The family will understand.”
“I’m the maid of honor. I have to make a toast.”
“I can do it for you,” Lindy offered. “We’ll tell everyone you’re not feeling well.”
For a split second, Annie almost agreed to the suggestion. Then she shook her head, ashamed of her weakness. Somewhere, way down deep inside, the brave Annie still lurked. She lifted her chin. “No. I’ll do it.”
Lindy reached out to squeeze Annie’s hand. “There she is,” she said softly. “There’s the Annie I know.”
Later, Annie would wonder where she found the stamina to endure the three hours she spent at the reception. It could only have been a fight or flight response kicking in. She’d chosen to fight for a little while longer, for Gracie’s sake. She knew she was running on nothing but sheer adrenaline.
She made her toast to the happy couple. Jake made his while she stared in his direction with a pasted-on smile. She kept to the sidelines when Gracie tossed her bouquet into Mimi’s eager hands. She watched as that woman gave Nate a broad wink before tugging him onto the dancefloor. She spoke with old friends of the family. Jo Wakefield was married! The delightful shock of that news carried her through another hour of dancing and chitchat. She danced with her father and with Ethan and Nate. She danced with Uncle Sean. She danced with Matt. She danced with Devin Wakefield. She danced with Tom Lancaster. She danced with Hank Atkinson, Jo’s new husband, still spry on the dancefloor, a merry twinkle in his sharp eyes.
She didn’t dance with Jake.
But she’d been very aware of him. He appeared to be enjoying himself. In fact, just an hour or so into the reception, he collected a small crowd around him and Darlene, all of them having a grand time, laughing and making merry. He was the Jake of old. Fun-loving, friendly, charismatic.
Watching him with a discreet eye, Annie recalled the first time she’d been aware of Jake as a man, not just her best friend. It’d been at his college graduation party. He’d been surrounded by a bevy of pretty girls. He never lacked for girlfriends all through high school and college but, until that moment, she never gave much thought to why the girls flocked around him and why he was so popular with everyone. Sure, he had a gorgeous physique that any girl would admire: tall and lean with the shoulders and arms of someone who’d not only been the star quarterback on the football team in both high school and junior college, but who’d also wielded hammers and lifted haybales since he was a boy. But his was not a handsome face in the classic sense. His features were too sharp and angular beneath his black, close-cropped hair, his nose square, his lips on the thin side. His eyes redeemed him, however, that unique mix of silver and blue under thick black lashes. But, ultimately, it wasn’t his looks that drew people in. He exuded a genuine confidence and charm that most people took to immediately.
That old charm of his was in full-force tonight. It was as if he were making up for lost time. Or, he could just be trying to rile her, Annie thought. Making her pay for keeping the truth from him. Her former self might have walked up to him, yanked him away from Darlene and either punched him in the nose or kissed him.
Now she just didn’t have the strength or the will. She was exhausted. She was done. With one last hug for Gracie and a nod to her grandmother, she quietly left the party.