During the last few days, Lizzy had been watching Anne de Bourgh for any sign that her health might be affected by all the emotional upheaval at Pemberley. During the carriage ride to Ashton Hall, Anne had contributed little to the conversation, stating that she preferred to listen to Georgiana speak of her debut or Lizzy’s answers to her cousin’s many questions about life at Longbourn. There was also a slowness in her movements that was a sign of fatigue, so when the weather went from dreary to dismal and the rains came, Lizzy suggested that they remain at Ashton Hall so that Anne could rest, and rest she did.
The first day after their arrival, Anne did not come downstairs until one o’clock in the afternoon, and Georgiana teased her cousin that she was picking up her bad habits. The second day was a repeat of the first, and it was then that Lizzy realized why Anne felt comfortable keeping to her bedchamber and foregoing playing cards after dinner. A weight had been lifted off her shoulders because Lady Marguerite was now in charge.
Although Lizzy thought Lady Marguerite was an absolute jewel, she greatly intimidated Georgiana with her outspoken opinions.
“Aunt Marguerite wants me to be strong like Aunt Catherine, but not bossy. Assertive like she is, but not scary. A good hostess like Lady Helen, but not to be like her in any other way. Oh, and one more thing, she said that I should never marry anyone who is prettier than I am. Of course, she was referring to Jeanne and Mr. Wimbley.”
The much maligned Mr. Wimbley had departed that morning to visit a relative who had suddenly taken ill. As Aunt Marguerite had explained it, “Once he realized that I would not stay in the dragon’s den, which is how he refers to my suite of rooms, he hightailed it to his brother’s house in High Wycombe, and Jeanne went with him to make sure he was visiting his brother and not someone else.”
“I do not think Lady Marguerite had a very happy marriage,” Lizzy suggested as a reason for her harsh treatment of her son-in-law.
“Oh, I know she did not,” Georgiana said. “She made that quite plain when I asked how long Lord Ashton had been gone. She said that he had died ten years ago, but added, ‘He had a heart attack brought on by… Oh, never mind, you are too young. Just let me put it this way, he did not die alone.’” Lizzy tried to suppress a smile, but Georgiana noticed. “I know I am young, but even so, I understood what she was talking about. I think it is awful when one’s spouse is unfaithful. I do so hope that I shall marry someone who will be faithful to me. I want to be deeply in love with my husband and he with me.”
So do I, Lizzy thought.
***
After a five-day visit, Anne announced that she was prepared to resume her journey but hoped that she would be able to have a full day’s rest at either Netherfield Park or Longbourn before going into Kent. Lizzy thought of the palatial Rosings Park and decided that Netherfield Park was the better choice—at least for Anne, and when Lizzy suggested to Georgiana that she stay with Jane as well until Anne had departed, Georgiana agreed. In that way, Lizzy would have time to speak with her mother, and she knew what her first question would be. “Are you engaged to be married to Mr. Darcy?” When she answered no, the inquisition would begin.
Although Lizzy had only been gone for two weeks, she felt as if she had been away from Hertfordshire for a month, and Jane hugged her as if she had been absent a year. Despite the short interval, Jane, now in her fifth month, had blossomed in her sister’s absence, and there was no longer any way to conceal her pregnancy. The proud father came bounding into the room, greeting everyone with his irrepressible cheerfulness.
Lizzy was easily convinced to stay the night at Netherfield Park. She would delay her mother’s probing questions as long as possible, but Jane was equally curious about recent events and visited with her sister in her room after everyone had retired.
“Lizzy, I do not know what to make of your short visit to Pemberley. You seem to be in good spirits, but I suspect if there was an announcement to be made that I would already know of your engagement to Mr. Darcy because you would be unable to contain your joy.”
An announcement? Was there anything to announce, Lizzy wondered. Mr. Darcy’s chilling words before leaving for Scotland continued to echo in her mind: “Please know that you owe me nothing. You are not bound to me.” Unsure of her future with the master of Pemberley, Lizzy chose to remain silent.
“Mr. Darcy and I are not engaged,” Lizzy said in a quiet voice. “He was called away on a family emergency, and since Miss de Bourgh’s health became a concern, it was decided that we should leave Pemberley. But once Anne departs for Rosings, Miss Darcy will come and stay at Longbourn.”
“Oh my! Won’t that be interesting? The mistress of Pemberley will be staying at our humble abode,” Jane said, laughing, but then she asked, “What happened with Mr. Darcy? I thought the purpose of his inviting you to Pemberley was so that he could propose at the Darcy ancestral estate.”
“I am afraid things got off to a rather bad start. We both have strong temperaments, and we quarreled. However, it had the effect of clearing the air, and after that, my visit was quite pleasant. But then he had to leave. And I can see you are looking for more information, but I have nothing else to share.”
“Good gracious! How long does it take for a man to utter the words, ‘Will you marry me, Miss Elizabeth?’ That is all that need be said. What is the difficulty? I simply do not understand the delay,” Jane said in a raised voice, indicating her continued frustration with her sister’s suitor.
“I think it will finally be decided when he comes to Longbourn for his sister, but until then, I am as much in the dark as you are.”
***
When Mr. Bingley’s carriage pulled into the drive, everyone was expecting Jane and Charles to emerge, so no one came out to greet Elizabeth. But when Lizzy went into the drawing room, she was nearly overpowered by an exuberant Kitty and a squealing Mrs. Bennet. With Jane and Lydia married and Lizzy away in Derbyshire, Kitty had only Mary for companionship, and since the two sisters had nothing in common and no hope of that ever changing, evenings had been very dull for Kitty. The ruckus created by her welcome brought her father out of his sanctuary to welcome his daughter home.
“While you have been gone, not two words of sense have been spoken in this house,” Mr. Bennet told his favorite daughter and gave her a peck on the cheek. “I look forward to a return of intelligent discourse.”
Lizzy was delighted by the warmth of her homecoming, but then she turned around and saw her mother, who had been waiting for her daughter to burst out with the good news that she was to be married to the very wealthy Mr. Darcy. When Lizzy said nothing, she asked, “Well, are you engaged or not?” And the room went quiet in anticipation.
“Mrs. Bennet, she has only just walked in the door,” Mr. Bennet said, scolding his wife.
“What has that to do with anything? She is either engaged or she isn’t. So which is it?”
“I am not engaged, Mama,” Lizzy said, looking at her father rather than addressing her mother.
“But I told you that you should not come home until you were betrothed. Why are you here? Why was your visit so short? That is the problem,” she said, wagging her finger at her daughter. “You did not give him enough time.”
“Mama, Mr. Darcy was called away on a family emergency.”
“So what! You should have stayed at Pemberley until he came back. You may have lost him by leaving Derbyshire.”
“Mrs. Bennet, if it is Mr. Darcy’s intention to make our daughter an offer, then he will find Lizzy no matter where she is. If traveling the distance between Derbyshire and Hertfordshire is an obstacle to their becoming engaged, then I must say that I would be reluctant to give my consent to the match.”
“Mama, I could not possibly remain at Pemberley because Miss de Bourgh had to return to Rosings, and Miss Darcy came with her. They are both staying at Netherfield Park until Miss de Bourgh goes to Kent, and then Miss Darcy will come here.”
“Oh my goodness!” Mrs. Bennet exclaimed. “Miss Darcy? Here at Longbourn? Why didn’t you say that from the start? As long as we have her, Mr. Darcy must come here to recover his sister.”
“Mrs. Bennet, you make it sound as if we are holding the young lady hostage.” Mr. Bennet gestured for Lizzy to follow him into the study. After the door was closed, he poured a sherry for his daughter and a port for himself. She looked as if she needed it.
“What happened in Derbyshire?”
“A great deal,” Lizzy said after taking more than a sip of sherry. “It is a lot more complicated than I ever thought it would be. After taking into consideration the prestige of the family, their aristocratic neighbors, the size of the estate, the number of servants, etc., I was quite overwhelmed by all the responsibilities expected of the wife of Mr. Darcy.”
“Come, come, my dear. Those things are important, but if you love Mr. Darcy, it certainly should not deter you from marrying him.”
“Papa, please do not say ‘if I love him.’ I do love him—so very dearly. But he is a complex man, and there were times when I did not understand what my role would be. I thought that I might not be exactly what he needs because… Oh, I don’t know how to explain myself.”
“If you are trying to say that he is a difficult man to be around, maybe he does not deserve you.”
“Oh, no, Papa. He is such a good man, and he deserves a wife who will stand by his side through trials and tribulations.”
“Trials and tribulations? What does Mr. Darcy know of such things? He lives in a grand manor house on an estate of thousands of acres with servants at his beck and call. He has wealth, prestige, and rank. He wants for nothing.”
Lizzy looked away from her father, and tears filled her eyes. Mr. Darcy wanted for nothing—nothing except that he be wholly human, that he not live in fear of discovery, and that his every move not be dictated by the phases of the moon.
“My dear, something is bothering you. Please tell me what it is.”
“Papa, it is not that Mr. Darcy does not deserve me. It is that I may not be what Mr. Darcy needs to live his life to the fullest.”
“I do not understand you, child.”
“I know.”
***
The days passed quickly. With Anne’s return to Rosings Park, Georgiana had come to stay at Longbourn. After much discussion, the final accommodations were that Georgiana would sleep in Kitty’s room because both were close in age, Mary would share Lizzy’s room, and Mrs. Brotherton would have Mary’s bedroom.
“Lizzy, it is so funny,” Georgiana said, giggling. “I have such a big house with so few people in it, and you have a small house with so many people. Isn’t that odd?”
Lizzy chuckled to herself. She had never thought of Longbourn as being a “small house,” but to someone who lived in a grand country manor, the Bennet homestead probably did look small. Despite so many people living in tight quarters, Georgiana loved it. Having lost both of her parents by the time she was thirteen, and having only the one brother, who was ten years her senior, she was enjoying the energy and closeness of the Bennet family.
Georgiana was a perfect fit. Because Miss Darcy had access to an impressive library at Pemberley and had been educated at one of London’s finest seminaries, she had a broad base of knowledge that Mary eagerly tapped into. Better yet, a friendship had developed between Kitty and Georgiana, and Miss Darcy was a more suitable companion for her than Lydia ever was.
When the young ladies walked into Meryton to pick up the mail at the inn, seventeen days had passed since Mr. Darcy had left Pemberley. In addition to letters from Mrs. Gardiner and Mr. Bennet’s sister, there were letters for both Lizzy and Georgiana from Mr. Darcy that had been forwarded to Meryton by Mr. Jackson. Lizzy quickly tucked the letter into her reticule, but Georgiana broke the seal on hers, and when a smile appeared on her face, Lizzy knew that all was well, and she handed the letter to Lizzy.
My Dearest Georgiana,
We made excellent time and arrived a day earlier than expected. Rupert and Teddy are both well and send you their regards. However, there were some difficulties in arranging schedules, and so I must remain until those problems have been worked out. But I am confident that they will shortly be resolved, and I anticipate being back at Pemberley well in advance of my scheduled appointment. So there are no concerns on that account. Please give my best to Anne and Miss Elizabeth.
Yours, Will (writing from Carlisle)
“My brother thinks we are still at Pemberley,” Georgiana said. “He will be disappointed when he finds that we are not there, but what could one do when Aunt Catherine sent a carriage for Anne?”
“Well, he will learn from Mr. Jackson the reason for our departure, and all will be well. Shall we go to the circulating library and see if anything interesting has come in on the London coach?” Lizzy asked, hoping that Georgiana would not mention that she too had received a letter.
As soon as Lizzy reached Longbourn, she went to the sitting room so that she might read Mr. Darcy’s letter in private.
Dear Elizabeth,
All is well here. Things went much better than expected. I look forward to seeing you when I return to Pemberley.
Yours, F. Darcy
Lizzy could hardly believe it. Three sentences! That was what she had been waiting for all this time? Such brevity was a message in itself. He had asked her to reconsider her decision to marry him when it was obvious it was he who was doing the reconsidering. She went to her father’s study, and with fire in her eyes, she announced, “Papa, you were right. Mr. Darcy does not deserve me.” She turned on her heel and left.