There are thousands of varieties of potatoes and just as many ways to prepare them. This is definitely a good thing, since potatoes are delicious and filling. They’re also a great defense weapon (who would ever expect you to throw a potato at them?)—but that’s beside the point. Potatoes are quick, tasty, and easy to make so be sure to always keep some on hand.
DID YOU KNOW?
Raising animals for food requires massive amounts of food and raw materials: Farmed animals consume 70 percent of the corn, wheat, and other grains that we grow, and one-third of all the raw materials and fossil fuels used in the U.S. go to raising animals for food.
GERMAN ’TATO SALAD
E ven if you can’t get to the beer garden, you can be an honorary German year-round with this tasty concoction of ’taters and mustard.
2 lbs. red potatoes
1/2 cup chopped chives
1 cup vegan bacon bits
6 tablespoons vinegar, or to taste
1/3 cup vegetable oil
3 tablespoons brown mustard, or to taste
Salt and pepper, to taste
Wash the potatoes and stab them with a fork (to vent). Place in microwave for 5 minutes or until tender. You should be able to easily stick a fork in them, but they shouldn’t fall apart. Cut into cubes. In a large bowl, mix together the bacon bits, chives, vinegar, oil, and mustard. Toss the potatoes into the bowl and mix until the potatoes are well-coated. Add salt and pepper.
Makes 4 servings.
CLASSIC POTATO SALAD FAKE-OUT
With vegan mayo instead of the eggy original, no one will ever guess that their new favorite classic potato salad is a faker.
4 large russet or Idaho potatoes
1 cup vegan mayonnaise
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1 cup chopped celery
1/2 cup chopped chives
Salt and pepper, to taste
Wash the potatoes and stab them with a fork (to vent). Place in microwave for 8 minutes or until tender. You should be able to stick a fork in them, but they shouldn’t fall apart. Cut into cubes. In a large bowl, mix together the mayonnaise, mustard, celery, and chives. Add the potatoes and toss until well coated. Add salt and pepper. Chill and serve.
Makes 4 servings.
TOUGH AND STUFFED SWEET POTATOES
Sweet potatoes as stuffed with attitude as your boyfriend’s ex, only this dish won’t give you the stink-eye.
4 medium sweet potatoes
1 (15-ounce) can black beans, drained
1 (10-ounce) can diced tomatoes
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup vegan sour cream
Stab the sweet potatoes with a fork in several places to vent. Nuke until tender all the way to the center, 12 to 15 minutes. Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, mix together the beans, tomatoes, oil, and salt. Nuke for about 2 to 3 minutes, until just heated through. When just cool enough to handle, cut each sweet potato lengthwise (being careful not to cut all the way through), press open to make a well in the center, and spoon the bean mixture into the well. Top with some sour cream.
Makes 4 servings.
TEACHER’S PET TATER SKINS
Lay it on thick and hang on every bite. We promise, the Bac-Os are as Fake-O as your interest in what the teacher is actually saying.
1 potato
2 slices vegan cheese
1 tablespoon vegan bacon bits
2 tablespoons vegan sour cream
Salt and pepper, to taste
Stab the potato with a fork multiple times, like a blonde in a bad horror flick. Nuke on high for 5 minutes, or until tender. Take out of the microwave and cut in half. Top with the cheese and bacon bits. Place back in the microwave and nuke for another minute. Take out and top with the sour cream, salt, and pepper.
Makes 1 serving.
THE SWEETNESS ’TATER SALAD
Next to bringing a cooler full of “refreshing beverages,” bringing this surprisingly sweet ’tater salad to your next picnic is the easiest way to score points with your pals.
1 sweet potato, peeled and grated
1 (16-ounce) bag coleslaw mix (shredded cabbage)
1/2 (10-ounce) bag shredded carrots
Handful of raisins
1 apple, cored and diced
1/2 (20-ounce) can diced pineapple, do not drain
1/4 cup lemon juice
1/4 cup olive oil
Toss all the ingredients together in a large bowl and serve immediately.
Makes 2 servings.
PIONEER POTATO SALAD
Tastes like your 100-year-old granny’s 200-year-old recipe.
2–3 medium potatoes (try to pick ones around the same size for even cooking), washed
1/2 cup vegan mayonnaise
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 teaspoon pepper
Dill relish, to taste
Stab the potatoes with a fork (to vent) and nuke for about 3 minutes. Flip the potatoes over (careful, they’re hot!) and nuke for another 3 minutes. Mix the mayo, spices, and relish in a medium-sized bowl. Let the potatoes rest in the microwave for a few minutes (they will continue to cook). Remove the potatoes and cut into bite-sized pieces—usually halves and then eighths will do—carefully, as they may still be hot inside. Mix the potatoes with the sauce and enjoy!
Makes 4 servings.
POTATOES IN PARADISE
Single White Potato meets Dicey Green Avocado…you know this can only end with the two of them wrapping up in a tortilla and getting freaky.
1 Yukon gold potato
1 (10-inch) tortilla
1 avocado, diced
1/2 cup shredded lettuce
Salt, to taste
Stab the potato several times with a fork and get your frustrations out. Nuke for about 6 minutes, or until soft but not mushy. Cut into small cubes once cooled. Nuke the tortilla for 10 seconds to soften. Toss the potatoes, diced avocado, and lettuce onto the tortilla. Season with salt and wrap up.
Makes 1 serving.
PRETTY MUCH THE BEST BURRITO
It’s a Tatorito—a potato and a burrito mixed together. Get it?
1 sweet potato
1 (15-ounce) can pinto beans, drained and rinsed
2 large tortillas
1/2 cup salsa verde
2 tablespoons guacamole or vegan sour cream (or both, if you’re feelin’ feisty)
Poke some holes in the sweet potato with a fork. Nuke on high for 5 to 6 minutes, or until softened. Remove from the microwave, cut into small cubes, and set aside. Nuke the beans in a microwave-safe dish for 2 minutes and remove. One at a time, nuke the tortillas for 10 seconds to soften. To make the burritos, put half the potato cubes and half the beans in the middle of each tortilla. Top each with half of the salsa and half of the guacamole or sour cream. Eat.
Makes 2 servings.
CHILL-OUT CHILI FRIES
A ll work and no play will seriously fry your brain. Better take a study break with a plate of these delish fries!
1 bag frozen French fries
1 (15-ounce) can vegan chili or 2 cups homemade vegan chili
Place the French fries on a plate and nuke for 3 minutes, or until warm—or if you have a toaster oven, follow the directions on the package for cooking in a toaster oven. Empty the can of chili into a bowl and nuke for about 2 minutes, or until hot. Top the fries with chili and eat!
Makes 4 servings.
LAZY MAN’S CANDIED YAMS
Just like your mama’s home cooking, if your mama were too lazy to actually cook. We won’t slap you for eating it with your fingers, but you do have to get off your ass and cook it yourself.
1 sweet potato
Bottle of maple syrup
Stab the sweet potato with a fork multiple times to vent. Nuke on high for 5 minutes, or until tender. Let cool. Then pick the sweet ’tato up, squirt with some maple syrup, and eat like an apple.
Makes 1 serving.
IDAHO? NO, youda ho Potatoes au gratin
Potatoes. It’s what’s for dinner.
2 medium potatoes, sliced
1/2 cup nutritional yeast
1/2 cup soy milk
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon garlic powder
Place the potato slices in a bowl and nuke for 3 minutes. Mix the remaining ingredients together until a sauce is formed. Top the potatoes with the sauce and microwave for 2–3 minutes or until the potatoes are tender.
Makes 2 servings.
TWICE-BAKED POTATOES
Finally—something more baked than your roommate.
1 medium baking potato
1 teaspoon chopped chives
1/4 cup vegan sour cream
1/2 cup shredded vegan cheddar cheese
Salt, pepper, and garlic powder, to taste
Stab the potato with a fork like it owes you money. Nuke for 5 minutes, or until potatoes are tender. Remove from the microwave and cut in half lengthwise when cool enough to handle. Use a large spoon to scoop out the inside of the potato, leaving the skin intact. Place the scoopings into a bowl. Stir the chives, sour cream, and cheese into the scooped-out part of the potato. Season with garlic powder, salt, and pepper and mix well. Nuke for 2 to 3 minutes, or until heated through. Scoop the mixture back into the potato skin and eat.
Makes 1 serving.
’TIS THE SEASON(ED) POTATO WEDGES
Look, dude, it may not be winter, but what the hell, try these anyway!
4–6 small potatoes, cut into thick wedges
3/4 cup vegan margarine, melted
Garlic-and-herb seasoned salt, to taste
Nuke the margarine in a small bowl until melted, about 90 seconds. Place the potato wedges on a microwave-safe plate and pour the melted margarine on top, making sure that each wedge is well coated. Sprinkle the seasoned salt over the wedges and nuke for about 2 minutes, or until tender. Let cool before eating.
Makes 4 servings.
ONE-HANDED TATER
Leaves the other hand free for the TV remote, mouse, or whatever.
1 potato
Ketchup and mustard, to taste
Stab the potato with a fork multiple times to vent. Nuke on high for 5 minutes or until tender. Let cool. Then pick up, add some ketchup and mustard, and eat like an apple.
Makes 1 serving.
PIZ-TATO
This super simple pizza/potato combo will be ready to devour before you can speed-dial the pizza delivery guy. Besides, isn’t it just a bit shameful that you two are on a firstname basis?
1 large baking potato
3 tablespoons pizza or tomato sauce
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella-style vegan cheese
Stab the potato with a fork like you mean it. Microwave for about 6 minutes, or until squishy when lightly squeezed. Cut the potato in half and spoon pizza sauce over each half. Top with vegan cheese and pop back into the microwave for another minute, or until the cheese is melted.
Makes 1 serving.
CHEATER TATERS AND ONIONS
Whipping up a bowl of these taters and onions is even easier than paying the nerdy freshman downstairs to write your research paper.
1 potato, sliced
1/2 small onion, sliced
2 tablespoons vegan margarine
Salt and pepper, to taste
Put all the ingredients in a bowl. Cover and nuke for 4 minutes, or until the potatoes are tender.
Makes 1 serving.
MICRO-ECONOMICAL MICROWAVE POTATOES
When your supplies cannot meet your demands, there are always potatoes—cheap, filling, and delicious.
3 large potatoes, peeled and cubed
2 tablespoons vegan margarine
1 teaspoon onion powder
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
Combine all the ingredients in a dish and nuke for about 1 minute, until the margarine melts. Stir. Cook for 10 minutes more, stirring occasionally.
Makes 4 servings.
BEN FRANKLIN’S MISERLY MASHERS
When tuition’s due, it’s all about the Benjamins. Make your cash flow further with these penny-pinching potatoes
4 servings instant vegan mashed potatoes, cooked according to the package
1 tablespoon vegan bacon bits
1 tablespoon vegan cheese
1 tablespoon vegan sour cream
1 tablespoon chopped chives
Salt and pepper, to taste
Cook the instant potatoes according to the package, then mix together in all the other ingredients. There you go! It’s best to add the bacon bits right before serving.
Makes 4 servings.
CRUNCHY MUNCHIES
For when it’s late, and you’ve spent your last quarter on laundry.
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
1 potato, sliced paper thin (use the “cheese” part of a grater to do this)
Salt, to taste
Pour the oil into a plastic bag (a produce bag works well). Add the potato slices and shake to coat. Lightly coat a large dinner plate with oil. Arrange the potato slices in a single layer on the plate. Nuke for 3 to 5 minutes, or until lightly browned. Place the chips in a bowl and toss with salt. Let cool. Eat.
Makes 4 servings.