DESSERTS

 

If you’re anything like us, you have an out-of-control sweet tooth that can flare up anytime, anywhere. It demands attention like a drunk girl at a party. Well, now you can satisfy yourself with some Ice Cream Pudding Pie or No-Bake Chocolate Cake. Feel free to share to score some brownie points with your RA.

DID YOU KNOW?

According to the American Dietetic Association, “Well-planned vegan and other types of vegetarian diets are appropriate for all stages of the life cycle, including during pregnancy, lactation, infancy, childhood, and adolescence.”

CHOCOLATE DIP STICKS

Salty and sweet—a great combination.

1 (12-ounce) bag vegan chocolate chips

1 (10-ounce) bag pretzel rods

Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles (optional)

Line a tray with wax paper and set aside. Put the chocolate chips in a bowl and nuke for 1 minute. Stir. Heat for another 30 seconds, if necessary, and stir till smooth. Grab your pretzel rods and hold them over your bowl while, using a spoon, drizzling the melted chocolate over each pretzel. Hold over another bowl and sprinkle with sprinkles, if using. Place on the lined tray and put in the fridge until cool.

Makes 4 servings.

BACHELORETTE PARTY BERRIES

Have an engaged friend? Congratulate her on getting her MRS degree by making these bangin’ berries. Then make her see how many she can fit in her mouth at once.

1 bag vegan chocolate chips

Strawberries

Wooden skewers

Put the chocolate chips in a bowl and nuke for 1 minute. Stir. Heat for another 30 seconds, if necessary, and stir until smooth. Dip the strawberries in the chocolate and place on aluminum foil to dry. Impale a few on each skewer and serve.

Makes 4 servings.

SPRING BREAK REMINDER PUDDING

Forget ambrosia—this is the food of the gods.

2 cups jarred mango, drained

1 teaspoon lime juice (from squirt bottle or fresh)

Shredded coconut and chopped pecans, to taste

Put the mango and lime juice in a blender and blend till smooth. Top with shredded coconut and/or pecan pieces and serve.

Makes 4 servings.

DUE DATES

Students live and die by deadlines. Now you can chew through yours like Godzilla in Tokyo.

1/2 cup raw nuts (try peanuts or cashews, but any will work)

2 tablespoons cinnamon

2 (8-ounce) bags pitted dates

Grind the nuts in a food processor or blender until chopped into small pieces. Add the cinnamon and pulse to combine. Set 13 to 15 dates aside, then add the rest to the blender. Grind again until the dates are about the same size as the nuts. Pour into a bowl and set aside. Cut the reserved dates down the long side in order to make room for the filling. Pinch small bits of the mixture together and stuff the dates. Eat.

Makes 4 servings.

FAKE BLONDES

We don’t care if you highlight as long as your food is fake, too.

1/2 cup applesauce

2/3 cup sugar

1/4 cup canola oil

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup whole-wheat flour

4 tablespoons cocoa powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 cup vegan chocolate chips

Put the applesauce, sugar, canola oil, and vanilla in a large bowl and mix together well. In another bowl, mix together the flour, cocoa powder, and salt. Add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients, stirring just until the dry ingredients are wet. Add the chocolate chips and stir a few times to incorporate. Pour into a baking dish that’s been sprayed with cooking spray. Nuke for 4 to 5 minutes. Let cool to harden before cutting into bars.

Makes 4 servings.

GEORGIA PEACH COBBLER

You don’t have to be a sweet Southern belle to enjoy this dessert, y’all.

1 (15-ounce) can peaches with syrup

1/4 cup quick oats

1/4 cup corn flakes or granola (if using granola, make sure it’s broken into small bits)

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

1 tablespoon brown sugar

Remove 1 tablespoon of the syrup from the peaches and set aside. Mix together the oats and cereal or granola in a bowl. Put about 1/4 of the cereal mixture into a separate bowl, then add 1/3 of the peaches (including the syrup). Repeat the layers, ending with the cereal mixture on top. Sprinkle on the cinnamon and sugar and drizzle the reserved tablespoon of syrup on top. Nuke for about 2 minutes, until hot. Let cool for a few minutes before digging in.

Makes 4 servings.

MELON HEAD GRANITA

A cross between a snow cone and a sorbet, this chill treat is just begging to be spooned.

4 cups seedless watermelon chunks

1/2 cup sugar

1 tablespoon lemon juice (fresh or from a squirt bottle)

Puree all the ingredients in a blender until smooth. Pour into a shallow, wide pan and freeze for 1 hour. Scrape the sides with a fork down to the bottom several times, then freeze for an additional hour. Repeat the scraping, and freeze for 1 more hour. Remove from the freezer, scrape with a fork, and serve immediately.

Makes 4 servings.

BANANA HAMMOCK BALLS

Full of tropical fruits and nuts, the only thing missing is a hammock. What were you thinking?

2 ripe bananas

1 cup shredded sweetened coconut

1/2 cup chopped dates

1 1/2 tablespoons cocoa powder

Mash the bananas in a bowl. Add the other ingredients and then form into balls. Nuke in the microwave for 1 minute, or until heated through.

Makes 4 servings.

ICE CREAM FRIZZLE DRIZZLE

Best to use at our favorite type of bar—a vegan ice cream sundae bar!

1 cup frozen berries

1 tablespoon powdered sugar

1/2 teaspoon dried mint

1/8 teaspoon vanilla

Blend all the ingredients together in a blender. Pour on top of ice cream, sorbet, cake, or another sweet of your choice, and serve.

Makes 4 servings.

NOON IN CANCUN FROZEN “YOGURT”

Reminisce about that spring break trip to Mexico with a bowl of fruity, cool, and creamy goodness.

1/2 cup soy yogurt (your favorite fruit flavor)

1/4 cup orange juice

1/4 cup canned pineapple chunks, drained

1/4 cup canned orange slices, drained

Sprinkle of coconut

Put the soy yogurt, orange juice, pineapple, and oranges in a blender and blend until smooth. Pour into a bowl and stir in the coconut. Freeze for at least 1 hour before eating.

Makes 4 servings.

CREAMY BANANA-WAFER PUDDING

Any recipe with pudding is an automatic crowd pleaser.

3/4 cup vegan vanilla wafers

2 bananas, sliced

1 package vegan pudding

1 1/2 cups cold soy or almond milk

Put the wafers in the bottom of a 9 × 9-inch dish and top with half of the banana slices. Prepare the pudding by placing the dry pudding mix and the cold soy or almond milk in a blender and beating gently until smooth. Pour the pudding on top of the banana-wafer “crust.” Let set in the fridge for a couple of hours. Top with extra banana slices and serve.

Makes 4 servings.

FOOD OF THE GODDESSES

Pamper yourself with these tasty morsels.

3 1/2 cups vegan cake or cookie crumbs (just crumble some soft cookies or cake)

1 1/2 cups powdered sugar

5 1/2 tablespoons vegan margarine

6 tablespoons orange juice

1/3 cup shredded coconut

Stir together the cake crumbs and powdered sugar in a large bowl. Add the margarine and orange juice. Mix well, then form balls about 1 inch across. Roll the balls in the shredded coconut, place on a large plate, and chill in the refrigerator for an hour, until firm.

Makes 4 servings.

MIAMI BEACH PUDDING

It’s like spring break for your mouth!

1 (16-ounce) package soft tofu

1/2 cup sugar

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1/2 cup shredded coconut

Whip the tofu, sugar, and vanilla extract in a blender until stiff and creamy. In a bowl, fold the coconut into the tofu mixture. Pour the pudding into parfait glasses or individual dessert bowls and chill. For an extra treat, serve topped with chocolate sauce.

Makes 4 servings.

POSEUR PINEAPPLE PIE

Looks like pineapple pie, but don’t be fooled by this suspiciously docile dessert. Underneath it all, it’s just fruit trying to be something it’s not.

1/2 tablespoon cornstarch

1 (20-ounce) can crushed pineapple, refrigerated and undrained

1 cup fresh blueberries

1/2 pint fresh strawberries, cut up

1 (20-ounce) can sliced peaches, drained

1 vegan pie crust

Put the cornstarch and 3 tablespoons of the cold pineapple juice in a dish and mix together well. Add the rest of the pineapple juice, along with the pineapple, and nuke for 5 minutes, or until bubbling and thickened. Set aside. Arrange the blueberries, strawberries, and peaches in the crust and cover with the pineapple sauce. Refrigerate for at least 1 hour before serving.

Makes 6 servings.

CHEAPSKATE DATES

A small price to pay for a big reward. Don’t you wish all of your dates were this cheap and easy?

1/2 (8-ounce) container vegan cream cheese

1/4 cup powdered sugar

2 tablespoons orange juice

1 box whole pitted dates

Powdered sugar, optional

Beat together the cream cheese, powdered sugar, and orange juice in a bowl. Cut each date down the middle and stuff the cream cheese mixture into the date and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes. Dust with powdered sugar before serving, if you wanna get fancy.

Makes 4 servings.

CHOCO-NANNER PARFAIT

Parfait is French for perfect. Say that to those Study-abroad hotties over at the languages building and see how they swoon.

1 package vegan pudding (vanilla or chocolate)

1 1/2 cups soy milk

1 cup crushed vegan cookies or graham crackers

2 large bananas, sliced

Vegan chocolate chips

Mix the pudding with the milk. Refrigerate for 10 minutes. Layer some of the cookies, banana slices, and pudding in a tall glass. Top with some chocolate chips and refrigerate for 1 hour.

Makes 4 servings.

BLUEBERRY PIE DUMP CAKE

Like with dumpster diving, all of the good stuff is always at the bottom.

1 (21-ounce) can blueberry pie filling

1 (8 1/2-ounce) can crushed pineapple, sweetened and undrained

1 (9-ounce) package vegan yellow cake mix (try Duncan Hines—many are vegan)

1/3 cup vegan margarine, melted

1/2 cup coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans

Spread blueberry pie filling evenly into a cake dish, then spoon pineapple (including the juice) on top of it. Sprinkle cake mix evenly over the fruit, then sprinkle the nuts on top. Drizzle melted margarine as evenly as possible over all. Set the cake dish on a book to raise it a little nearer the center of the microwave, then nuke uncovered for 10 minutes. Give the dish a quarter turn twice during cooking. Mixture should be boiling throughout. Set dish out on flat surface and allow to cool before serving.

Makes 6 servings.

BREAKUP PUDDING

Nothing mends a broken heart quite like sitting in bed in your pajamas, watching hours of reality TV, and eating an entire bowl of this chocolate pudding.

1 pack firm silken tofu, crumbled

10 tablespoons sugar

8 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

2 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Pinch of salt

Blend all ingredients in a food processor or blender until creamy and thick. Chill.

Makes 4 servings.

NO-BAKE CHOCOLATE CAKE

No oven? No problem. Help yourself to some Easy Bake lovin’ straight from your microwave oven.

Nonstick vegan margarine spray

3 tablespoons vegan margarine, softened

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup banana, mashed

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/4 cup soy milk

1/2 cup flour

2 tablespoons cocoa powder

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

Dash of salt

Spray a medium bowl with nonstick spray and set aside. In a separate bowl, combine the margarine, sugar, banana, vanilla extract, and soy milk; stir together. Combine the flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, and salt in another bowl. Stir the dry mixture into the wet one until smooth, then pour into the greased bowl. Cover and cook in the microwave on high for 2 to 2 1/2 minutes, or until cake springs back when touched. To serve, let the cake cool five minutes. When it’s cooled, cover the bowl with a plate and turn both bowl and plate upside down so the cake falls onto the plate.

Makes 4 servings.

MALLOW-NUT TRUFFLES

All your favorite snack foods in one bite. It doesn’t get any better than that.

1 cup plain popped popcorn

1 cup vegan marshmallow topping (we like Smucker’s and Ricemellow)

1 cup salted peanuts

1 pound vegan semisweet chocolate, broken into pieces

Coat a baking pan with oil and/or cooking spray. Gently mix the popcorn, marshmallow topping, and peanuts together and form into little mounds on the pan. Put the chocolate pieces in a bowl and nuke for 1 minute. Stir. Heat for another 30 seconds, if necessary, and stir until smooth. Pour the melted chocolate over each little mound, covering completely. Refrigerate until chocolate is set.

Makes 4 servings.

COUCH SURFER SPONGE PUDDING

Super smooth banana pudding that’s easy to make and easy to swallow—unlike the fact that your couch-crashing buddy won’t get off your futon.

1/4 cup vegan margarine

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup banana, mashed

2 tablespoons soy milk

1/2 cup self-rising flour

In a medium bowl, mix together the margarine and sugar until smooth. Add the banana and soy milk and, while stirring, slowly add the flour, mixing until all the ingredients are well blended. Cover and nuke for 3 1/2 minutes, or until the pudding is slightly congealed. Eat.

Makes 4 servings.

LOCO-COCOA SNACK CAKE

Crazy fast and delicious.

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup sugar

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 cup water

1/2 cup vegetable oil

2 tablespoons white vinegar

2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda, cocoa powder, and salt in a bowl. Combine the remaining ingredients in a separate bowl, then stir into the flour mixture. Microwave on high for 6 to 7 minutes, rotating 1/4 turn twice, until a fork comes out clean when inserted in the center. Let cool for 10 minutes.

Makes 4 servings.

CHOCOLATE DORM CAKE

Need to find common ground with someone? This cake is a great way to start—there’s no problem that chocolate cannot solve.

Super moist chocolate cake mix (Duncan Hines has vegan options—follow directions for a super moist chocolate cake)

1 (8-ounce) container vegan cream cheese

1/4 cup sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 1/2 teaspoons egg replacer mixed with 2 tablespoons water

1 (12-ounce) bag vegan chocolate chips

Pour 3/4 of the cake batter into a casserole dish, then set aside. In a bowl, stir together the cream cheese, sugar, vanilla, and egg replacer until smooth. Fold in the chocolate chips. Spread the cream cheese mixture evenly over the batter in the casserole dish. Pour remaining cake batter into casserole dish. Cook uncovered in microwave for 15 minutes. Rotate the cake while cooking. Watch closely and make sure the cake is cooking evenly. Let cool 5 or 10 minutes. Flip cake onto plate and serve.

Makes 4 servings.

MARSHMALLOW MADNESS SQUARES

Graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows. Need we say s’more?

30 graham crackers, divided into squares

1 (12-ounce) package vegan semisweet chocolate chips

6 tablespoons vegan margarine

1 (12.25-ounce) jar vegan marshmallow topping (we like Smucker’s and Ricemellow)

1 (13-ounce) box puffed rice cereal

Spray a 13 × 9-inch pan with cooking spray. Place 15 graham squares on the bottom of the pan, overlapping slightly. Set aside. Put the chocolate chips and 2 tablespoons of the margarine in a bowl and nuke for 2 minutes, then stir until melted. Spread half of the melted chocolate over the graham squares.

Nuke the remaining 4 tablespoons of margarine in a bowl for 45 seconds, or until melted. Add the marshmallow topping and stir until smooth. Add the cereal and mix to coat.

Press the cereal mixture firmly over the graham squares in the pan. Drizzle with the remaining melted chocolate. Immediately top with the remaining 15 graham squares. Cool and then dive in!

Makes 10 servings.

PINK PRINCESS PIE

Charm those snotty girls on the campus events committee with this sweet and creamy dessert while you make your case for allowing a vegan bake sale during welcome week.

1 (12-ounce) can pink lemonade concentrate

2 1/2 cups soy ice cream

Vegan graham cracker pie crust

Blend the lemonade concentrate for 30 seconds in the blender. Spoon in the ice cream, and blend until combined. Pour into the crust and freeze overnight.

Makes 4 servings.

SNOWBALLS FROM HELL

The odds of these peachy keen popsicles lasting once your roommates know about them? A snowball’s chance in hell. Like your odds of getting into your first choice for grad school.

1 1/2 cups canned peaches, drained

1/4 cup peach preserves

1 tablespoon sugar

1 tablespoon coconut flakes

Put everything in a blender and blend. Place 2 tablespoons of the mixture in each cube of an ice cube tray. Freeze until almost firm, then insert a toothpick in each one and freeze the rest of the way.

Makes 4 servings.

SCREAMING PUDDING PIE

One bite of this, and your taste buds—and maybe your crush—will be screaming for more.

1 cup cold soy milk

1 cup vegan ice cream (any flavor), softened

1 package vegan pudding

Graham cracker crust

Mix together the milk and ice cream in a large bowl. Add the pudding and mix for 1 to 2 minutes. Pour into the crust and refrigerate for a couple of hours.

Makes 4 servings.

SHAKE-AND-MAKE FRO YO

Don’t settle for that diseased dairy crap from the ice cream stand down the street. Make your own!

1 gallon-sized plastic resealable bag

3–4 pounds of ice cubes

6 tablespoons rock salt

2 tablespoons sugar

1 cup vanilla soy milk

1/2 tablespoon vanilla extract

1 pint-sized plastic resealable bag

Vegan cones

Fill the gallon-sized plastic bag half full with ice. Add the rock salt and set aside. Pour the sugar, soy milk, and vanilla into the pintsized bag and seal. Place the pint-sized plastic bag inside the gallonsized plastic bag and seal. Shake the bag for 5 to 7 minutes. Remove the pint-sized bag from the larger bag. Use scissors to cut away a corner from the pint-sized bag, then squeeze the soy ice cream into the cones, soft-serve style. Top with sprinkles, if desired.

Makes 4 servings.

 

 

NOTE:

Use oven mitts to prevent your hands from getting too cold.

COMFORT PUDDING

I promise, this pudding will distract you from checking your cell every 10 minutes to see if he texted you.

1/3 cup cocoa powder

3/4 cup sugar

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/4 cup cornstarch

3 cups soy milk

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Put the cocoa powder, sugar, salt, cornstarch, and soy milk in a dish and nuke for 5 minutes, stirring halfway through. Remove from the microwave and stir in the vanilla. Chill before serving.

Makes 4 servings.