CHAPTER 43

Eryx stood hunched over his bathroom sink, his fingers threatening to crush the marble edge of the countertop. How had he let this happen to her? How had he just stood there and watched Calix drag her to the palace? He should have taken her and run as fast as he could, straight to Adia. Now he was left to wonder if that was to be the last time he would ever see her alive.

He splashed his face with water and looked up into the mirror, his tormented gaze freezing as he took in the changes. He leaned forward, looking closely at his eyes; they were bright blue, as blue as the sky over Adia. The short hairs that had appeared on his scalp, the ones that he shaved away every morning, were much lighter than usual. He ran his hand over them in disbelief.

What happened? The last time his colors had changed, it was because his heart had betrayed him and fallen for Tovi Tivka. He had worn her colors like a disgraceful badge hoping no one would notice. But these colors? Where did they come from? His love for her was as strong as ever. Had Tovi’s allegiance changed? To whom? He knew no one with these colors, had never seen anyone in Adia or on the mountain with these eyes.

He could feel the frustration building as he frantically searched his memory. His heart thudded loudly in his ears as he told himself that Tovi could never love him. She already loved someone else. Weren’t these new colors proof enough? He felt like such a fool.

Eryx rarely displayed self-pity, but these thoughts were especially potent, triggering the rage that was always so close to the surface. His oldest scar, which marred the skin just below the left side of his collar bone, ripped open, allowing blackness to ooze out through his shirt. He glared at his reflection, wondering whose eyes were looking back at him. Not knowing what to do with his grief and wrath, he slammed his fist into the mirror.

Shards scattered everywhere, and black blood seeped from a deep cut between two of his knuckles. He let it flow, knowing that bleeding to death would be better than the fate Tovi faced.

Eventually he moved to his kitchen table and wound bandages around his hand, trying to think of anything other than Tovi.

“I’d say the mirror got the worst of it,” Silas said from the doorway. “May I come in?”

“I’m not used to you asking,” Eryx said without looking up. He wasn’t surprised that he had shown up. He realized with annoyance that something in him had been waiting for Silas.

“Want me to take a look at that?”

“No.”

“I can fix it.”

“I don’t care.” He continued to wrap his wounds, never showing any emotion. Not even anger.

“What happened?”

Finally, Eryx looked up, but only for a brief second. Then he went back to work.

Silas wasn’t deterred. “I already know what’s upsetting you. Why won’t you talk to me about it?”

“If you already know, then why ask?”

“Because I care about you,” Silas said, exasperation evident in his tone. “You are the strongest person on this mountain, and I don’t mean just your muscles. You have been through horrific tragedy, and yet you still have the capacity to love. I want to be your friend, Eryx. I want to help you find a better way.”

This time Eryx looked up and stared at Silas, but he wasn’t really seeing the Adian. Images of his family and a better time raced across his mind, speeding past so quickly that he could grasp none of them.

The men looked at each other, one with frustrated respect and the other with the pain of unspeakable memories. “Horrific tragedy? It was my fault. I killed them.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

Eryx had just finished binding his hand. “It was my hatred that bred dissension within my family.”

“It was their choices that destroyed them. You are not blameless, Eryx, but you have taken far too much of the guilt. But that’s not why I’m here.”

“What do you want?” Eryx yelled, banging his newly-bandaged fist on the table and releasing the tension that had been building since Silas entered. “Another favor? I did everything you asked. I got Xanthe to avoid her lesson and take Tovi to the HH. I went and took care of her when she was bleeding to death. But then, when she really needed me, I just stood there and watched them take her to the palace.”

“Again, you are shouldering blame that isn’t yours. You did everything right.”

“I should have taken her straight to Adia. I could have, you know. I could have just taken her and run away. There was that moment . . . That moment when I was telling her to run. I was too much of a coward to run with her.”

Eryx buried his head in his hands and completely lost control. He didn’t care that Silas was there to see it. He screamed. He cursed. He let wave after wave of grief pour out as his massive shoulders heaved.

When Eryx finally looked up, Silas was sitting calmly on the other side of the table, his speckled yellow-green eyes shining with shared pain.

“If it’s not to remind me of my failures, why are you here?” Eryx asked.

“To see if you’re ready to start over.”

Start over? It would be impossible to undo the evil he had committed. “What do you mean?”

“I want you to leave this mountain. Come to Adia with me and begin a new life. You don’t have to live with the marks on your back that cause you so much pain.”

“I won’t leave Tovi here.”

“Fine. You don’t have to live with the marks here either. We can start the process anywhere and at any time.”

“What process?” Eryx asked suspiciously.

“There is a way to get rid of the marks immediately, and I offer this to you whenever you are ready. However, the dark sludge that burdens your veins has seeped throughout your body. You see it when you spit or cough or bleed. It has taken over your stomach, your lungs, your heart. I will take away the marks, but we must do the work of ridding your body of this darkness together.”

“How?”

“I’ll tell you as we go.”

“Will it hurt?”

“Yes.”

“Then why would I do it?”

“Because when your blood is clean and rich and your tears and sweat run clear, you will experience a kind of freedom you could never achieve with the power of your own might. The difficult task of ridding your body of this disease is worth it, Eryx. I want this for you.”

Eryx’s heart thumped loudly, and he was more aware than ever of the sluggish blood in his veins. Then Tovi’s face came to mind, and his murderous hatred of King Damien, Calix, Leeto, and all the others surfaced, calling him to action.

He clenched his teeth and looked at Silas. “If I can’t find this freedom on my own, then I don’t want it.” He pushed back his chair and stormed out of the room.