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acting parents 174–84
and acceptable behaviour 178
and known behavioural difficulties 179
long stays/permanent 180–4
regular stays 178–9
routine and boundaries 175–7
activity overload 86–8
additives, food 121, 263–6
adopted children 180–4
attachment disorder 122–3
alcohol 232–4
allura red (E129) 265
apple crumble 372
Asperger’s syndrome 116–19
attachment disorder 122–3
attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) 111, 113–16, 120, 122
and diet 262, 263, 265, 266
attitude 214–15
autistic spectrum disorders 116–19
autonomy 46–7
B vitamins 281
babies (0–1 year) 3–10
in day care 197–9
daytime routine 8–10
introducing yoghurt into diet 299
sleep 4–5
3Rs 5–6, 10
what not to do at night 6–8
bad behaviour, not bad child 55, 254
bad language
pre-teens and early teens 216
starting school 69–71
bagels 297, 315
banana and honey whip 378–9
banana smoothies 300
beans, baked 270, 274, 276, 303
beef and baby sweetcorn stir-fry 362
behavioural disorders 119–21
bereavement 94–7
Beslan school siege 105
‘big fish’ (9–11 years) 78–91
activity overload 86–8
children comparing parents 79–80
disciplining child’s friends 90–1
don’t compare your child 84–5
parental peer pressure 86
safety/independence balance 81–4
3Rs 83–4, 88–9, 90
bipolar disorder 121–2
biscuits, calories in 269
black pudding 303
blackmail by children 17, 146
BMI (body mass index) 270
board games 63
body language (non-verbal communication) 23–4, 147–8
boundaries 12, 73, 139, 254
acting parents 175–7
during bereavement 95–6
Boxing Day tsunami 105
bread
breakfast ideas 297–8
calories in 269
fibre in 277
protein in 274
wraps and rolls for packed lunch 314–15
see also toast
bread pudding 376–7
breakfast
for adults 310
cooked 301–10
drinks 295
full English 302–3
importance of 293, 295
leftovers for 309–10
quick, ideas for 296–301
routine 294–5
school 309
bubble and squeak 342
bulgur wheat 322
bullying 71–2
caffeine 263, 295
cake 259, 260, 269, 275
cake in custard 378
calcium 282
calories 267–70
in average portions 269–70
required for boys/girls 268
carbohydrate 274–5, 295
carmoisine (E122) 265
casseroles and hot pots 355–9
English hot pot 358
meat and vegetable 356
vegetable 357
cauliflower cheese 328
cause and effect 74–5, 253
celibacy 242
cereal
breakfast 296
calories in 269
fibre in 277
character 46–9
cheating 63–4
cheese 279, 281, 282
fillings 316
sauce 334–5, 359
cheesecake 379
chicken and noodle stir-fry, honeyed 362–3
childminders 201
closed choice 34–6, 255
reforming siblings 161
in school 191
cod liver oil 279
comparison
of children by parents 84–5, 109, 255
of parents by children 79–80
computers see television/computer sanctions
Conduct Disorder 119–21
consistency 21–2
control 24–8, 254
and bullying 72
food as means of 288, 292
maintaining, with difficult children 147–56
parent/child balance 26–8, 49
regaining, with difficult children 127–8
cooking times, meat
frying 370
grilling 369
roasting 365–6
cottage pie 348–9
couscous 322–3
crime 53, 124
crisps 259, 269, 323
croissants 298, 315
crying 4, 5
Request, Repeat, Reassure 5–6
to sleep 7–8
curry 353–5
dairy produce
calories in 270, 279
fat in 279
vitamins and minerals in 281, 282–3
decision-making 27–8
dehydration 284, 295, 314, 345
denial 75–8
desserts
dinner 371–80
lunch 343–5
diabetes 262, 276
diet 114, 255
bad 259–61
and behaviour 121, 261–2
good (well-balanced) 267–83
reducing fat in 280
difficult children 124–63
addressing key issues 128–9
allowing extra time 138
being demanding 140–1
blackmail 146
body language 147–8
confrontation 134–6
family meeting 130–1
family norm 153–5
food 152–3
impudence 141–2
interrupting and talking over 142–3
maintaining control 147–56
no excuses 155–6
parent leads 149
parent’s chair 149–50
parent’s conversation 152
parent’s phone 151
politeness 139–40
progress 138–9
quality time 136–7
reforming siblings 156–63
regaining control 127–8
routine 129–30
rudeness and aggression 140
selfishness 143–4
signs of 125–7
stepchildren 160–1
3Rs 129, 131–4, 148
throwing things 145–6
turning around 33–4, 57, 89, 124–46
zero tolerance 128
dinner (main meal) 346–81
convenience food 381
main courses 347–71
puddings 371–80
divorce or separation 97–9
Father Christmas syndrome 98–9
drinks
additives in 265–6
breakfast 295
calories in 270
at home 345
packed lunch 314
see also fluid
drug abuse 232–3, 235–7
dysfunctional families 56–7
E numbers 263–4
causing problems in behaviour 265–6
egg 302
breakfast ideas 304–7
calories in 270
fillings 316
protein in 274
egg in a nest 326–7
eggy bread 307
emotional abuse 54
excusing child’s behaviour 155–6
facts of life 70, 238
family meetings
difficult children 130–1
reforming siblings 157–9, 163
stepfamilies 170
family norm 153–5
family time 111
teens 210–11
fast food, calories in 269
fat 278–80
fibre 275–8
fighting (siblings) 162
fillings 315–17
fish
fillings 316
oily 279
protein in 274
fish and sweetcorn pie 358–9
fluid 284
see also drinks
food
additives 263–6
breakfast 295–310
calories in 269–70, 279–80
and difficult children 152–3
fat in 279–80
fibre in 276–7
fussiness/refusal to eat 153, 288–92
as means of control 288, 292
processed 121, 259, 260–1, 262
protein in 274
vitamins and minerals in 281–3
withholding 291
see also diet
foster children
absence of respect 52–3
attachment disorder 122–3
autism 118–19
bad language 69
disregard for consequences 74
‘honeymoon period’ 179, 180–1
ignorance of acceptable behaviour 56–7
impact of moving into care 100–1
initial aloofness with difficult children 189
left to cry as babies 7
promiscuity 241–2
regression 43–4
role of family members 183–4
sanctions 32–4
school discipline 194
smacking banned 13
special needs diagnoses 112–15
taking adult’s chair 150
talking over 143
tantrums 18–19
throwing things 145–6
turning around 33–4, 57, 89, 125, 150
see also acting parents
friends (children’s), disciplining 90–1
friends (parents’), looking after children 202–3
fruit
breakfast ideas 298–9
calories in 269
fibre in 277
lunch ideas (home) 343–4
lunch pot ideas 318–19
gravy, onion 352
height, average 271–2
heroin 237
homosexuality 242
hot pots 355, 358
see also casseroles and hot pots
house rules 253
differences between families 79–80, 81
reforming siblings 157
teens 220–1
young adults 246
hummus 316
humour 64
imitation 10–11
impudence 141–2
individuality 47, 79
interrupting and talking over 142–3
iron 282
kids’ hash 326
kids’ kebabs 340–2
lasagne 349–50
leading (parent first) 149
leftovers 309–10
lentil soup 331–2
liberal attitudes 124–5, 193
lunch
bread, wraps and rolls 314–17
convenience food 345
home 324–45
packed 313–24
pasta 333–9
pots 318–23
school 311–12
toast 339–40
macaroni cheese 334–5
magnesium 283
material possessions 68
mealtimes
establishing good 286–7
importance of 285–6
meat 364
braising 367
calories in 270, 280
cold fillings 315
fat in 280
frying 369–70
grilling 368–9
protein in 274
roasting 365–7
stewing 367–8
and two veg suggestions 364–71
meat and vegetable casserole 356
Mr Nobody syndrome 75
mobile phones 68
Monopoly 63
moving house 100–4
muffins, English 298, 315
mushroom soup, cream of 332–3
naan 315, 354–5
nannies 203–4
naughty chair 28–30
neglect, unintentional 54
9/11 105
non-verbal communication see body language
nursery 38–9
children’s anxieties 44–6
nursery staff 196–200
nuts
fat in 280
fibre in 277
lunch pot ideas 319
protein in 274
obesity 262
older teens (15–18 years) 227–42
peer groups influence 229–32
sex and relationships 238–42
smoking, alcohol and drug abuse 232–7
omega-3 oils 121
omelette 304
onion gravy 352
Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) 119–21
and tartrazine 266
pancakes 308–9
parental attention 54
parental peer pressure 86
parent’s chair 149–50
parent’s conversation 152
parent’s phone 151
pasta
fibre in 277
lunch pots 320–1
lunches at home 333–9
main meals 347–8, 349–50
protein in 274
pasta bake 336–7
peanut butter 274, 316
peer group influence
older teens 229–32
school 67–8, 79
pepper, stuffed 327–8
pets, death of 96–7
play 62–4
teamwork and cooperation 72
playfulness 64
politeness 51
difficult children 139–40
ponceau (E124) 266
positive expectations 22–4, 254
teachers 188
potato
calories in 270
and carrot soup 330–1
jacket 311, 325
protein in 274
pots, lunch
fruit/nut 318–19
main meal 320–3
praise 32, 55, 74, 85, 254
reforming siblings 159, 163
teens 209, 215, 225
and 3Rs 15–16, 49, 118, 191
precocious children 48–9
pregnancy, teenage 241, 242
pre-teens and early teens (11–15 years) 205–27
attitude 214–15
bad language 216
bedrooms 219–20
communication 209
don’t criticise 209–10
don’t take it personally 213
don’t tease 212
family time 210–11
give responsibility 211
golden rules 208–14
guide 210
hear their views 208–9
house rules 220–1
image 217
praise 209
privacy 208
rewards 225
safety 211–12
sanctions 223–5
3Rs 210, 213–14, 215, 218–19, 225–6
truancy 221–3
unwelcome habits 218–19
preschool staff 196–200
preschoolers see rising fives
presence 186
privacy 208, 255
processed food 121, 259, 260–1, 262
protein 273–4, 295
puberty 205
puddings 371–80
see also desserts
quality time 54, 255
difficult children 136–7
young adults 252
quiet time see time out
quinoline yellow (E104) 265
reasonableness 24–6, 28
redundancy 99–100
regression
older children 43–4
preschoolers 42–3
relatives looking after children 202–3
respect 50–4, 255
children and teachers 195–6
‘respite’ fostering 115, 177
responsibility 255
for bad behaviour 75–8
siblings 109, 160
teens 211
restraining 61
reverse psychology 19
rewards 31–2
reforming siblings 158–9
teens 225
toddlers 17–18
rice 354
lunch pot 321–2
pudding 375–6
rising fives/preschoolers (3–5 years) 37–49
behaviour and character 46–9
morning routine 39–41
nursery 38–9
nursery anxieties 44–6
regression 42–3
Ritalin 114
roasting times, meat 365–6
role playing 62–3
routine 3, 4, 253
acting parents 175–7
babies’ daytime 8–10
breakfast 294–5
children with autism/Asperger’s 117
in day care 197–8
difficult children 129–30
during bereavement 95–6
preschoolers’ morning 39–41
reforming siblings 157
rudeness and aggression 140
safety
balance with independence 81–4
teens 211–12
salad
fillings 316–17
lunch pot 319
salt 260, 284
sanctions 32–4
difficult children 136
teens 223–5
sauce
cheese 334–5, 359
stir-fry 361
tomato 335–6
sausage and rice pan casserole 328–9
school see big fish; starting school; teachers; truancy
school dinner 311–12
‘self-fulfilling prophecy’ 23, 188
selfishness 143–4
separation anxiety 176, 184
sex and relationships 238–42
sexual abuse 194
siblings 36, 107–11, 255
dos and don’ts 109–11
play together and apart 62
reasons for fighting 108–9
reforming 156–63
sleep, babies 4–5
bed-sharing 6
crying to 7–8
daytime routine 8–10
3Rs 5–6, 10
smacking 13, 54, 204, 254
smoking 232–3, 234–5
smoothies
breakfast 299–301
lunch 344
snacks 382
soup 329–33
lentil 331–2
mushroom, cream of 332–3
potato and carrot 330–1
spaghetti (lunch) 337–8
spaghetti bolognese 347–8
special needs 111–23
Spock, Dr 3, 11
sponge pudding 377
star charts 32, 158–9
starting school (5–8 years) 65–78
bad language 69–71
being disliked by your child 73
bullying 71–2
cause and effect 74–5
school influence 66–8
taking responsibility for bad behaviour 75–8
STDs (sexually transmitted diseases) 241, 242
stealing 78
step-parents 164–73
being tested 169–70
bonding and fairness 171–2
don’t blame the stepfamily 172–3
don’t criticise the estranged parent 168
observe family dynamics 167–8
older stepchildren 166–7
out-of-control children 170–1
parenting essentials 173
use what works 169
young stepchildren 165–6
stir-fries 360–4
stress 92–4
manifestation in children 93
sugar 259, 260–1, 262, 275, 295
sugar high 262, 295
sunset yellow (E110) 265
swearing 69–71, 216
sweets
additives in 265–6
banned from packed lunch 313
calories in 269
reason for limiting 260
tagliatelle 338–9
tantrums 16–17
older children 18–19
tartrazine (E102) 266
teachers 148, 184–96
avoid over-familiarity 189
and children’s home life 194
class dynamics 194
don’t reward bad behaviour 192
gaining attention 187
initial aloofness 189
keep physical distance 190
no discussion 193
parents working with 66–7
positive expectations 188
presence 186
and respect 195–6
and teaching assistants 193
using the 3Rs 191
using time out 195
voice modulation 187–8
techniques 22–37, 50–64
teenagers
closed choice 35–6
time out 60
turning around unacceptable behaviour 57
see also pre-teens and early teens; older teens
television/computer sanctions 33–4
terrible twos 11–12
third person 30–1, 254
3Rs (Request, Repeat, Reassure/Reaffirm) 12, 266
babies 5–6, 10
body language 148
children with autism/Asperger’s 117–18, 119
children’s friends 90
and the closed choice 36
in day care 197–8, 199
difficult children 129, 131–4, 148
morning routine 40–1
9–11-year-olds 83–4, 88–9, 90
persistent challenges 83–4
persistent misbehaviour 23
playing fairly 63–4
preschoolers 40–1, 49
reasonable requests 24–6, 28
reforming siblings 161
and respect 50–1, 53
sanctions 32–3
at school 191
swearing 70
tantrums 17, 19
teens 210, 213–14, 215, 218–19, 225–6
time out 58
toddlers 13–16, 17, 19–21
throwing things 145–6
time out (quiet time) 57–61
adults 59
reforming siblings 161–2
at school 195
teenagers 60
toad in the hole 350–1
toast
breakfast 296, 303
lunch 339–40
toasted sandwiches 308, 340
toddlers 10–22
consistency 21–2
in day care 199–200
rewards 17–18
smacking 13
tantrums 16–17
terrible twos 11–12
3Rs (stopping unwanted behaviour) 19–21
3Rs (when child refuses Request) 13–16
tomato pasta 335–6
tooth decay 262
trifle 380
truancy 221–3
vegetable casserole 357
vegetables
calories in 270
cooking 364–5
fibre in 276–7
vitamins and minerals in 281–3
vitamins and minerals 281–3
lack of, in poor diet 259, 260, 381
steaming to preserve 364–5
weight, ideal 270–2
Welsh rarebit 307–8
world events 104–6
wrong behaviour, explaining 55–7
yeast extract 316
yoghurt 270, 274, 279, 299, 314, 344
additives 264, 265, 266, 299
young adults 243–52
enjoying 252
level of maturity 244–7
new rules and expectations 247–50
parents moving house 102–3
in trouble 250–2
zero tolerance
difficult children 128, 136
reforming siblings 161
zinc 283