Sarah sat in her favourite chair in the dining room, nearest the fireplace. The crackle of the coal and the smoke swirling up the chimney did not distract her from the envelope in her hand. She looked at the spidery handwriting and a smile spread across her face. It was from Charles. With nervous fingers, she ripped open the seal and quickly unfolded the letter.
Dear Ma,
I hope this letter finds you all right and father is being nice to you all. It's very wet here in the trenches and we have seen our fair share of rats, but we are keeping well. I'm not spending much of the twelve shillings and sixpence the army pay me; there aren't many shops around here, ha ha. I received the parcel, thank you. It was great to eat chocolate again, as we seem to be living on bully beef at the moment. When one of us receives a parcel, we share the contents; it lifts our spirits to have a treat. Can you send me some socks because my feet are permanently cold and wet? Some of the chaps here are wearing two or three coats. It would be good to be warm again. Tell Alice the balaclava fits a treat, although the shape of it did make me laugh before I put it on.
It was strange being here on Christmas Day. I missed you all. The Germans lit some lamps on Christmas Eve and started singing carols, so we followed suit. No shots were fired. It was strange sleeping in such silence when we have been used to the constant barrage of bombs and gunfire. On Christmas Day, we were all terribly brave, left our trenches and talked about our families. You know Ma, they are just ordinary men, like me; some have small children. It makes you see things a little different. Some of the chaps played football with the Germans. The next day, it all returned to normal, although I am not sure how hard we all tried to kill each other. Somehow, things are different now.
Before I go, I want to tell you about a gift box I received from Princess Mary, no less. The brass box had some ciggies in it, as well as a pipe and tobacco, along with a tinderbox and a Christmas card. I'll try and send it home, so it can be kept safe.
I haven't seen Robert, but Freddie and Stephen are around here somewhere. I am hoping to get leave soon. It’ll be lovely to sleep in a proper bed and eat some home cooking. Say hello to everyone for me and hopefully I'll get home to see you soon.
Your loving son
Charles xx
Sarah's vision became blurry as she tried to read the letter again.
Dear Ma,
She chuckled. The cheeky boy, calling her ma; when did he assume that was all right? She ran her fingers across the words he had written. Her baby was safe, and that was all that mattered. She stopped trying to read and hugged the letter close to her chest, hoping he was right and she’d see him soon, to judge for herself. She would show the girls. They’d be thrilled to hear from Charles, and Alice would be happy to know that Freddie was with him, and more importantly, safe.
‘What's that you have there?’ Luke's voice carried in the silence.
Sarah jumped in her seat.
‘And why are you hugging it?’
She clung on to the letter as she lowered her hands onto her lap, the folds of her black skirt wrapped around them. All excitement and happiness was immediately washed away by his cold tone. ‘It's… it's a letter from Charles.’ Sarah wondered if she should offer it to him, but she couldn't bring herself to let go of it.
Luke sat down at the dining table. Once comfortable, he wrapped his hands around the china teapot, before pouring himself a cup. ‘The post arrived early this morning. Was there anything else?’
‘No, at least I don't think so.’
Luke sighed. ‘What do you mean, you don't think so? Either there was or there wasn't.’
‘There wasn't,’ Sarah mumbled.
‘What? Stop mumbling. Speak up.’
Sarah took a deep breath and pushed her shoulders back. ‘No, there wasn't any post, other than this letter from one of our sons.’
Luke arched his eyebrows as he stared across the room at her. ‘That's better.’ He picked up his cup and sipped the hot tea, before placing it back on its saucer.
Sarah turned the letter over in her hand. ‘Would you like to read it?’
Luke shook his head. ‘Not particularly. There won't be anything about the war in there because all the post is monitored, in case it falls into the wrong hands.’
Sarah's eyes widened as she fought to know what to say. ‘He says he might be home soon. He talked about a Christmas ceasefire and the men playing football with the German soldiers.’
‘Football? They are the enemy.’ Luke shook his head again. His voice rose with frustration. ‘I bet Robert wasn't involved in such shenanigans. They are meant to be fighting them, you know, keeping everyone safe.’
Sarah kept her focus on the letter, determined he wasn't going to spoil her happiness today. ‘They all received a lovely gift from Princess Mary, which was very kind, don't you think?’
‘If you ask me, it's all nonsense. They aren't children.’
Sarah stood up and colour raged into her cheeks. ‘That's just it, Luke, some of them are only children.’
‘When I was Charles’ age, I was—’
‘Yes, yes, we know, you had travelled across country on your own. We've all heard it before.’ Sarah took a deep breath. ‘Many, many times, Luke.’
Luke pressed his fingertips down on the table and slowly stood up, never taking his eyes off her. ‘How dare you talk to me like that?’
The soft tone sent ripples of fear down Sarah's spine. ‘I dare because you may not care whether your sons come home safe or not, but I do. To know that Charles is safe is everything, it's your fault he joined up in the first place.’
Luke eyed her, daring her to keep talking. ‘I might have known it would be my fault.’
‘If he hadn't been so desperate to impress you, he’d still be here, so yes, it is your fault.’
Luke scuffed back his chair. ‘I can see there is no talking to you today; best you sort yourself out before I get back. I will not tolerate such behaviour from you, or anyone else in this household.’ He glared at her, hands clenched by his sides. ‘Do you understand? Have I made myself absolutely clear?’
Sarah nodded.
‘I can't hear you.’
Sarah slumped back into the chair she had only recently vacated. ‘Yes, very clear.’
*
Alice sat in the family sitting room with a closed book on her lap. Her mother sat opposite her. They both stared into the flickering light that came from the golden flames of the open fire. The logs crackled and every so often a spark would fly onto the hearth.
‘The letter was wonderful, wasn’t it?’ Sarah kept staring ahead into the flames.
Alice smiled. ‘It was, Ma.’
Sarah laughed. ‘That is a title I will not be keeping.’
Alice chuckled. ‘To just know they’re all safe is wonderful news. I wonder if Robert will write to us, although he hasn’t so far, so I suppose it’s unlikely. We’ve to assume no news is good news.’
Sarah glanced at Alice and nodded. ‘I wonder where they are and what they’re doing.’
Alice shrugged her shoulders. ‘In some respects, I’d rather not know.’ Her mind instantly went to the Pathé newsreel she had seen at the cinema with Freddie. The men at the front, standing in trenches flooded with water, smoking their cigarettes, some waving and smiling for the camera. She couldn't tell her mother that Robert and Charles were certainly in that situation.
The front door slammed shut. Neither looked around, both assuming it was Lily.
‘Is this how you greet your prodigal son?’ Charles kept his voice low.
Sarah and Alice both jerked round and jumped up out of their chairs, ignoring the books thumping to the floor.
‘Please tell me I'm not dreaming. I do believe I’ve just willed this to happen.’ Sarah stared wide-eyed at her son.
Alice's eyes filled with tears. Her emotions became too much for her to handle.
‘There’s someone else I’ve picked up along the way.’ Charles stepped back, turning his head to the doorway and shouted. ‘Come in.’
Alice's legs began to wobble. She sank down into the chair she had just vacated. There he stood, next to her brother, both of them in full army uniform. ‘I can't believe it. Is it really you?’ she whispered. She closed her eyes, squeezing them tight before slowly looking through her lashes to see if he was still standing in front of her. ‘Oh Lord, it's true.’ She was rooted to the spot, staring at his grey pallor. He had lost weight since she had last seen him, he looked older and his eyes were dull. She didn't want to think about what had happened to him. Tears rolled down her face. ‘I’ve dreamt of this moment so many times.’
Freddie didn't take his eyes off her as he took a step forward.
‘Come on, Sis, give the man a cuddle.’
Alice looked across at Charles, as though seeing him for the first time. He and Freddie had the same worn-down and lifeless look about them.
Sarah stepped forward, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. She wrapped her arms around her youngest son. ‘I can't believe you are here.’
Charles gave out a breathless noise. ‘Not so tight, I can't breathe.’
Sarah laughed and stepped back. She glanced across at Alice, who was openly sobbing in Freddie's arms.
‘I was so frightened I wouldn't see you again,’ Alice whispered in between her sobs. She gulped for air. The dampness, along with the metallic smell of blood and the body odour of someone that hadn't washed in a long time, clung to his uniform. It was rough under her soft hands, which gripped him tightly. ‘I’ve been so frightened.’
His eyes squeezed shut as he held her tight in his arms. He never wanted to let her go. Slowly, he opened them and rested his finger under her chin to lift it up. His other arm held her tight to him. He tilted his head as he lowered it. Their noses brushed as his lips rested gently on hers.
Alice moved her hands higher so her fingers could lose themselves in his hair, which had lost its softness. All thoughts of her mother and brother were forgotten as she pushed his head down, letting him know she wanted more. Her heart wanted to leap out of her chest as her body moulded to his. The bristles around his soft mouth scratched her skin, but she didn't care. She could taste smoke on his lips and mint on his breath.
Charles gave an awkward cough. ‘All right, Freddie, put my sister down.’
Freddie and Alice both jumped back. Colour flooded Alice's face.
‘Sorry, Mrs Taylor, I didn't mean to—’
Sarah laughed. ‘Don't worry, Freddie, I do understand. Just don't let Mr Taylor catch you.’
Freddie smiled and reached out for Alice's hand. ‘I won't, Ma'am.’
Sarah beamed from ear to ear. ‘It's good to see you both, although it looks like you could do with a good bath and something decent to eat.’
Charles laughed. ‘That's true. We’ve been living on tins of bully beef.’
‘I can't believe you’re home,’ Sarah and Alice said in unison.
‘It's not for long, Ma; we only have two days, then we are on our way out again.’
Sarah and Alice's faces dropped.
Freddie pulled Alice's hand up to his lips before turning it and kissing her palm. ‘Alice, I want us to get married before I go away again.’
‘But… but… nothing has been organised. I didn't know when you were coming home.’
‘Neither did we, but the opportunity came up, so we jumped at it.’
Alice frowned and looked straight at Charles. Was she allowed to be as happy as she felt right now. ‘Are Stephen and Harry home?’
Charles nodded. ‘I suspect they are by now.’ He laughed. ‘They were dreading the stick they were going to get from their families.’
Sarah smiled. ‘I expect they’ll just be pleased to see them; we’ve been so worried about you all.’
Freddie gave Alice's arm a little shake. ‘So, are you going to marry me tomorrow? Are you going to become Mrs Alfred Leybourne?’
The corner of Alice's mouth lifted. ‘I want to, but I haven't spoken to the vicar or organised what to wear, and Molly and Victoria wanted to be my bridesmaids as well.’ Alice's words tumbled over each other, in a bid to be heard.
Freddie lifted his hand. ‘I spoke to the vicar before I went away, so he’ll be fine about it. He knew it would be short notice.’
‘Really, I wasn't even sure you’d remember wanting to marry me when you came back. Molly and Victoria wanted to organise things, but I wouldn't let them.’
Sarah gazed lovingly at her eldest daughter. ‘Alice, stop worrying about things.’ She tapped her index finger against her mouth. ‘I know, while the boys have a bath and freshen up, you can always try on my wedding dress.’ She paused. ‘That's if you want to. I know it's not the same as having your own, but it was my mother's too, so I suppose you could call it a vintage look, but it's up to you.’
Alice beamed at her mother. ‘The thought of it makes me nervous because it’s important to you, but I’d love to wear it, if it fits.’
Sarah shook her head. ‘You know it means a lot to me because it was my mother's, but in the last few months, I’ve come to realise there are other things that are far more important. It's just a dress.’ She lifted her finger and tapped her temple. ‘My memories are all in here and I know my mother would be over the moon at the thought of you wearing her dress. Family was everything to her.’
Charles gave his mother a squeeze as he grinned at her. ‘Well, Ma.’
Sarah laughed and playfully hit Charles’ arm. ‘You can stop that, young man. I’ll have none of it.’
Charles laughed as he rubbed his arm. ‘Mother, it looks like there’s going to be a wedding tomorrow.’
Lily stood in the doorway, blinking rapidly. She couldn't believe what her eyes were telling her. ‘Any excuse for a party.’
Charles spun around as Lily ran towards him, their arms colliding as they wrapped them around each other. ‘Hello, Sis.’
*
Lily had spread the news last night and, consequently, the house in Bloomsbury Street was a hive of activity at seven o'clock that morning. An eleven o'clock wedding didn't leave much time for preparations. As the women's excited chatter grew, Luke folded his newspaper and decided to take himself off to the Gentlemen's Club for breakfast.
Sarah followed him into the hall. ‘Make sure you’re back by ten o'clock, won't you?’
Luke pulled his coat on over his suit jacket. ‘I will be back when I am ready, and not when you tell me.’
Sarah closed her eyes and took a deep breath. ‘I don't want Alice's big day ruined.’
‘And it won't be.’ Luke pulled up his collar before opening the front door. The biting wind rushed in and whooshed around the hall. He nodded before slamming the door behind him.
Sarah rubbed her hands as she walked back into the warmth of the fire in the dining room.
Lily gave her mother an anxious look. ‘Don't worry, he’s better off out of the way.’
Alice laughed. ‘Charles is certainly enjoying his lie in. Did father ask whether he would’ve liked to have gone with him?’
Sarah shook her head. ‘Charles is better off resting as much as he can, before he has to leave again.’
Lily frowned. ‘It would have been good for him to spend some time with Charles, to find out what the war is actually about, instead of glorifying it all the time.’
Alice nodded her agreement. ‘It would be nice for Charles to get some respect and for Father to let him know how proud he is of him.’
Sarah sighed. ‘Your father won’t change now, and today isn’t the day for worrying about it. There’s a lot to do.’
Molly arrived first, sitting Alice in front of her bedroom mirror before proceeding to roll, curl and plait her hair, within an inch of its life. It draped down her back in soft waves and curls. The hair at the front and sides had been pulled away from Alice’s face and held in place by a large silver and diamond flower hair slide.
‘I wonder where Victoria and Lily are?’ The white vapour of Alice's breath hung in the air. She looked in the mirror, not recognising the lady staring back. ‘Molly, have you spoken to Victoria?’ She frowned. So did the person in the mirror. ‘Is Stephen home?’
Molly laughed. The warmth of her breath was also a stark contrast to the air in the room. ‘Stop worrying. It's your wedding day. Everyone will be here soon enough.’
‘I haven't seen my mother either, at least, not since about seven-thirty this morning.’
‘She’s busying herself. After all, the mother of the bride has a lot to organise and you must admit, it has been very short notice.’ Molly tweaked a curl around her finger. ‘She didn't want to leave you, but I told her to do whatever she had to do and I'd look after you.’
Alice lowered her eyes and nodded, but she couldn't help wishing her mother was there with her. ‘And Lily?’
‘I suspect she’s helping your mother.’ Molly sat on the bed and looked around the room, letting her eyes rest on the wedding dress hanging on the back of the door. ‘Your grandmother's dress is beautiful.’
Alice smiled as she looked across at it. She fleetingly wondered whether Molly was shocked at the sparse decor of her bedroom. If so, she was too good a friend to say so. ‘It is beautiful and an honour to be able to wear it. It means so much to my mother. I was really surprised how well it fitted last night.’ The thought of being Freddie's bride sent tingles hopping and skipping over her body. ‘You know, I really want to marry Freddie today, but I feel that all this is wasting precious time. It's time I could be spending with him.’
Molly tilted her head and gave Alice a faint smile. ‘I know, sweetie, but it's an early wedding so there will be lots of time afterwards, and it’s obviously important to Freddie.’
Alice hunched her shoulders and her chin dropped to her chest. Colour burnt her cheeks. ‘Molly, I’m so sorry. I’ve been so wrapped up in myself, I haven't asked…’ The bedroom door creaked as it swung open, causing them both to look around.
Victoria stood in the doorway with dresses resting over her arm. There was still a fragility about her, but her eyes were alive, sparkling like stars on a clear night. ‘Here we are.’ Her face was crimson, while her chest heaved, as she gasped for air.
Alice jumped up and wrapped her arms around Victoria. The winter's cold, fresh breath was still on her skin. As their cheeks touched, Alice shivered and pulled away. ‘You’re freezing. Come in, not that it's much warmer in here.’ She smiled, stepping back so her friend could walk into the bedroom. ‘What have you got there?’
Victoria laughed. ‘Your mother insisted we went to the shops this morning. We actually went to Liberty's and she bought Lily, Molly and me a dress each, so we’d match.’
‘Oh, how lovely.’ Molly jumped off the bed, removed the dresses from Victoria's arms and laid the three of them on the bed.
‘Your mother and Lily will be up shortly to help you into your dress,’ Victoria rasped as she stepped over the threshold, pushing the door to, behind her. ‘Oh, is that it?’ Victoria stared at the beautiful white taffeta dress, with its layers of trumpet sleeves and lacework on the bodice, ending at the base of the neck. ‘It's beautiful.’ She turned to Alice. ‘You’re going to look stunning. Freddie's a lucky man.’
‘I'm the lucky one.’ Alice could feel her eyes welling up and blinked rapidly, still in disbelief that in a couple of hours, she’d be Alice Leybourne, Mrs Alfred Leybourne.
Victoria stood at the end of the bed and stared down at the dresses. ‘Mrs Taylor wanted to buy flowers as well, but I told her not to worry about them, because we could carry our bibles.’
Molly nodded. ‘That's a good idea.’
‘I wondered where you were. I was beginning to worry, in case something was wrong with Stephen.’
Victoria laughed. ‘No, he's fine. You'll see him later, and Daisy.’ Her upturned face beamed and her eyes danced. ‘He's enjoying having a lie in and sleeping in a proper bed. It was wonderful to have him come home so unexpectedly.’
‘I know what you mean. I thought I was imagining things when Freddie walked into our sitting room.’ Alice paused. ‘Did you tell him off for joining up?’
‘No, I probably should have done, but I was so pleased to see him…’
Alice laughed. ‘Yes, it was the same here when Charles walked in; all the anger and worry evaporated.’
Molly looked up from examining her dress. ‘These are beautiful.’ Molly ran her fingers over the soft, dark blue lace that overlaid the pale blue dress. The long sleeves were cuffed with the same detail. She let her fingers rest on the hard surface of the navy sequins, which had been sown onto the lace appliqué. ‘I hope it fits me; I'm going to be devastated if it doesn't.’
‘I'm pretty sure it will. It is rather fabulous isn't it? And we’ve matching navy blue hats.’ Victoria laughed at Molly's wide-eyed expression.
Sarah quietly opened the bedroom door and watched the girls. Their excitement and happiness was evident. Luke had better not be late back, she thought with a sigh. Surely he cared enough to be on time. She shook her head, concentrating on the girls' excitement as they examined the dresses. She moved slightly to watch Alice; she would miss her when she moved into her own home. The room became blurry; perhaps she’d be able to get her to stay, at least until the war was over. ‘Is everything all right in here?’
Alice turned around and gave her mother a huge smile. ‘Thank you. These dresses are beautiful. What are you going to wear?’
Sarah walked over and gave her daughter a hug. ‘It’s my pleasure. There may be a war on, but I still want you to enjoy your day, and don't worry about what I’m wearing. Now let's get you dressed.’