fourteen

Rayna tried to swallow the large lump in her throat.

Clay sighed. “If it makes any difference, there’s a reason I’m so determined to make the Cinch finale again. I’m dedicating my season to Mel. I’d like to honor his memory with a win, not with surgery and fizzling out.”

Rayna’s vision blurred. “That’s very noble. I’m sure it means a lot to Lacie.”

“It sure would mean a lot to me if you could stick around.”

Shaking her head, she opened the truck door. “I can’t.” She slid out and hurried to her car.

❧

Friday after work, Rayna parked by Clay’s truck in Lacie’s drive. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and got out. Three days since she’d seen him last. Why did he have to be here? Why had she promised to help with the closet? The breeze blew her hair into a tangle. Great, the windblown look.

Trying to smooth it back into some semblance of order, she squared her shoulders and rang the bell.

He answered. Green eyes widened. “Hey.”

Why did he have to look so good? “I promised to help Lacie and Star with the closet.”

“I’m working on the crib. They bought it a few weeks back and didn’t get around to putting it together. I thought having some friends help might take the sting out.”

“Shouldn’t you be at the rodeo by now?”

“I’m leaving as soon as I get this project done.”

“Does she know about you dedicating your season to Mel?”

“Cried. That’s pretty much what she does these days. Mom said grief and hormones are a double whammy.”

“I’ve heard pregnant women’s emotions get all out of whack. She’s got a lot on her.” Eager to escape his presence, Rayna hurried to Lacie’s bedroom.

Star knelt in the closet doorway while Lacie sat on the bed clutching one of Mel’s shirts to her nose.

Rayna’s eyes burned, and she blinked several times. Lord, I don’t want to end up like that. Strip all traces of Clay Warren from my heart. Help me to heal. Surely there’s someone out there with a harmless occupation.

What was she thinking? Until Clay, she’d never realized she wanted anyone to share her life with.

Lacie’s tear-brightened eyes radiated pain. “I must look like a ninny sitting here smelling his clothes.”

“No, you don’t.”

“I don’t want anything washed, just moved into the other closet. That way, every time I get dressed, I don’t have to see his clothes. But when I want to, I can visit them. Silly, huh?”

A memory stole Rayna’s breath for a moment. “I used to smell my mother’s clothes after she left.”

“Really?”

“It always helped.” Rayna patted Lacie’s shoulder.

Clay filled the doorway. “Crib’s done. Wanna come see?”

Lacie’s eyes closed.

“Maybe later,” Star whispered.

“I wanna see it.” Lacie stood. “I just wish Mel could.”

Clay put his arm around the petite blond. Together, they walked across the hall. With a glimpse of the crib Mel would never see, fresh tears assaulted Lacie.

“Maybe this wasn’t a good idea.” Star linked arms with Lacie. “Let’s go back to your room.”

“No. I like being here.” Lacie clung to Clay until she calmed. “Aren’t you supposed to be at the rodeo, cowboy?”

“I’ve got time.”

“I don’t want you driving too fast. Go do Mel proud.”

Clay kissed her forehead. “I will.”

“And be careful.” Lacie pointed a red fingernail in his face.

“I will.” He glanced at Rayna and turned to go.

“Okay, I’m taking another load. Be back in a sec.” Star exited, her arms piled high with western shirts.

Rayna stepped into the closet. “Does everything go?”

“Yeah.” Lacie sniffled. “You know, I wouldn’t give up a single second of our lives together. Even though it ended too soon, I’d marry Mel and suffer through every rodeo all over again. Even the final one. He was gone in an instant, but the nanosecond before that, he knew I was there supporting him.”

Methodically, Rayna pulled clothes from the rack.

❧

Clay couldn’t manage to take his eyes off Rayna. A whole week had passed since he’d last seen her. Seemed like years.

Dressed in paint-spattered jeans and T-shirt, with her hair pulled into a high ponytail, she was way too cute. When Lacie’s friends had decided to paint the nursery, he didn’t think Rayna would chance running into him again. Yet she did.

She straightened a corner of the drop cloth with her foot. “We need more paintbrushes.”

“There’s some on the kitchen table.”

Rayna left to get them, and his heartbeat slowed.

“You know”—his mom propped her hands on her hips—“Lacie shouldn’t be here.”

“Why?” Clay poured pastel green paint in a roller pan. “I thought it might cheer her up, getting the nursery ready.”

“Fumes. Pregnant women aren’t supposed to breathe paint fumes. It’s bad for the baby.”

“How am I supposed to know these things?”

“We need to get her out of the house, but it’s a bit nippy for sitting on the porch.” Mama lined blue tape on the window facing.

Rayna returned with four brushes.

Tapping her chin with a forefinger, Mama turned toward her. “I’ve got it. You and Clay take Lacie out for the day.”

Rayna’s eyes widened. “Why?”

“Paint fumes are bad for the baby.” Mama and Clay echoed each other.

Her hand flew to her mouth. “I didn’t know that. We have to get her out of here.”

“Okay, but where? Maybe the ranch?”

“I don’t know. Let’s just go.”

Fifteen minutes later, they piled in his truck with Rayna in the middle. Her leg brushed his, and she jerked away.

Clay swallowed hard. He should have stayed at the house and let Rayna occupy Lacie. But in the rush to get the baby away from the fumes, he’d fallen into Mama’s trap. A day spent with the woman he loved but couldn’t have.

“Where are we going?” Lacie asked.

“I have no clue.” Clay started the engine. “Away from fumes.”

“We could go shopping for the baby.” Rayna tugged her hair loose and pushed it back over her shoulders.

Silky strands of spun copper brushed his cheek, giving Clay the urge to run his fingers through it.

“My heart’s not in it without Mel.” Lacie adjusted her seat belt around the baby. “Don’t you have a rodeo tonight?”

Rayna’s jaw clenched.

Clay nodded.

“Breakfast at the ranch?” Rayna adjusted her shoulder strap.

“I guess I should feed the baby better. Fruit would be nice.”

“Fruit it is.” Clay turned toward the interstate. “Lacie, how about you stay there while we go back and paint?”

“Sounds fine, but I’d like to go to the rodeo tonight.”

Had he heard Lacie right? “There’s no need in that.”

“Do you have any idea how long it’s been since I missed a rodeo? It felt odd not going the last few weekends.”

“I guess if that’s what you want to do, you can go with me.”

Arms crossed over her chest, Rayna didn’t say a word.

Some way, he had to narrow the divide between them.

❧

That evening, with the nursery painted, Rayna couldn’t wait to put some distance between her and Clay. She headed straight for her car as Ty helped Lacie out of his truck.

“Where’s Clay?” Ty tipped his hat.

“Moving the furniture in. We opened all the windows to air out the house.”

“I’ll go help.” Ty hurried inside.

“I hope,” Lacie whispered, “you didn’t tell Star where I’m going tonight.”

“No.”

“Good. She’s leaving in the morning. She’d call Mama and Daddy. They’d all be upset and want me to move back to San Antonio with them.”

“Won’t they catch on?”

“I’ll just say I’m visiting a friend. I won’t have to lie, and they’re not used to a rodeo every weekend.”

“Are you sure you want to go?”

The pretty blond nodded. “For years I fought the rodeo with everything in me. Now it seems odd not to go. I think I’ll feel closer to Mel there.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

“Now, I don’t mean to pry, but you’re missing out on time you could be spending with the man you love. Are you sure you and Clay can’t work things out?”

“I can’t do it, Lacie. I love him too much to wait around for him to get hurt. Or worse.”

“I understand. I really do. More than most women could. But what if Clay died tonight?”

“Oh, don’t even say that.” Her heart gave a painful jolt.

“I know it’s a horrible thought, but think about it. Would you hurt just as bad as if you were still together? Maybe even worse? Would you regret all this time apart? Wouldn’t you rather wring out every possible second available to spend with him? Just think about it.”

❧

Rayna slowed the car as she neared Lacie’s house. So far, the baby had been shy, not revealing his or her sex. With another ultrasound scheduled, Lacie wanted someone to share the occasion with and had set up an appointment on her clinic’s late night to accommodate Rayna’s workday.

Pulling in the drive, she frowned. Clay’s truck. Lacie hadn’t said anything about him.

He answered the door, looking better than any man she’d ever seen. Why did he have to be so easy on the eyes?

“Hey there. I originally couldn’t go ’cuz I had a horse training session, but Dad covered for me so I could surprise Lacie.”

And me.

Lacie stepped up beside him.

He draped his arm around the mom-to-be’s shoulders. “Missing Junior’s revealing, it just didn’t sit well.”

“I hope he feels like revealing.” Lacie’s eyes shone. “Are we ready?”

At the doctor’s office, women in various stages of pregnancy walked or waddled.

A nurse ushered Lacie back to lie on a table. “You’ve got one stubborn baby, Mrs. Gentry. I can’t believe we haven’t been able to determine the sex at this late stage.”

“Like his daddy.” Lacie patted her stomach. “Stubborn as a mule.”

Rayna had never before seen an ultrasound. Apparently Clay hadn’t either. She’d never seen him uneasy, until now.

“She’s not gonna have to. . .uh. . .disrobe or nothing?”

“Clay Warren, do you think I would’ve let you come back here if I was gonna have to get naked?”

“Now, this will be cold.” The technician pulled Lacie’s shirt up and rubbed a gel-looking substance on her rounded belly. “Watch the screen.”

All eyes were glued to the monitor.

A blurred image appeared then cleared.

“Is that supposed to be a baby?” Clay asked.

The technician laughed and moved a pointer on the screen. “Right here is the side of a leg and foot. The baby is lying on its side and being difficult as usual. Come on, baby, roll over. Spread those legs.”

A perfect little foot kicked and squirmed. “Can you feel that?”

“He delivers some powerful wallops at times.”

Clay lapsed into silence.

“Come on, baby, roll over,” Lacie coaxed as the baby changed position.

“Now, there’s the stomach.” The technician moved the pointer farther down. “And there’s. . . Congratulations, Lacie, you’ve got a boy.”

“Really?” Clay asked.

“Right there’s the evidence.” Lacie couldn’t talk anymore as tears streamed down her face.

❧

Rayna tried to bypass Clay as she left Lacie’s house. If only seeing him would get less painful. But it didn’t.

He fell into stride at her side. “That was pretty cool. I mean, I knew there was a baby in there, but seeing it. Wow.”

“I wish Mel could be here with her.”

“Me, too. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t believe all that mumbo jumbo about people watching from heaven. If they were all up there watching, how could there be no tears in heaven? But for stuff like this, maybe God pulls back a curtain.”

“It’s a nice thought.”

“I don’t want to miss out on that. I want to see my baby, feel its movements, see it born.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her into his arms. “I want to marry you. I want to have children with you. Couldn’t we make things work, Rayna?”

She could imagine watching their baby on the screen.

“Ow.” He released her and grabbed his shoulder. “Sorry, wrong shoulder. Here, try this other one.”

She jerked away with a world-weary sigh.

His cell phone rang, and he dug it from his pocket. “Hello? Hey Gabby. She’s right here. Sure.” He closed the phone, a worried look on his face. “Wyatt and Kendra were in a car accident.”

She gasped. “Are they hurt?”

“Gabby called trying to find you.”

Rayna dug her phone from her purse. Dead battery.

“She didn’t know any details. I’ll drive.”

❧

Kendra met them in the emergency room, her eyes red-rimmed. “I think Wyatt’s okay. They’re checking him over.”

“Are you all right?” Rayna hugged her. “Did anyone else get hurt?”

“I’m fine. And we didn’t hit anyone else. We were celebrating Wyatt’s birthday, and we both had too many drinks with dinner. It’s a wonder we didn’t kill ourselves and others.”

Clay ran his hand through his hair. “What was he thinking?”

“He wasn’t. Neither of us was. His blood alcohol was just under the legal radar.”

“Here, sit down.” Rayna put her arm around Kendra’s shoulders.

“I saw my life flash before my eyes. And it wasn’t pretty.”

Rayna’s eyes widened. “Maybe this is a wake-up call from God.”

“I know you won’t believe this, but that’s what I was thinking.”

Rayna glanced over Kendra’s head at Clay.

“Come to church with us Sunday.” Clay smoothed a hair away from Kendra’s face.

“Okay.”

Wow, that was easy.

“But I think I’d like to get some things straight now. If it’s okay. I mean, do you have to be in church to get saved?”

“No.” Rayna clasped her hand. “You can do that anywhere.”

“Even if you’re doing it ’cause you got scared out of your wits?”

“If you’re sincere about it.”

“You’ve told me a zillion times, but how does it go again?”

“Just admit to Jesus you’re a sinner and that you need Him in your life. Ask for forgiveness of your sins. Do you want me to pray with you now?”

“I think I should do it.” Kendra bowed her head. “Dear Lord, I know I’m a sinner, and I ask You to forgive me. I want to change. I want to be a different person. I need You to help me do that. Make me a better person. Clean up my past and help me to start a new life. I accept You in my life. I need Your guidance. I’ve made such a mess of things.” Kendra peeked up at Rayna. “How’s that?”

“Very good.”

“Oops, I need to say amen or something, don’t I? Sorry, Lord, I’m new at this. Amen.”

Rayna hugged her. “I’m so happy for you.”

“The next step is to find a church home.” Clay patted her arm. “You can still go to church with Rayna and me Sunday.”

“I will. I promise.”

“While y’all were praying, the doctor came out. Wyatt’s fine.” Clay winked.

“Oh thank goodness.” Kendra covered her face with her hands.

“How about we take you home?” Rayna put her arm around her shoulders.

“Thanks, but I’d like to stay with Wyatt. You two go, and I’ll see you Sunday. Maybe Wyatt will come, too.”

❧

“That was awesome.” Clay turned out of the hospital lot.

“It was. God is awesome.” Rayna blew out a satisfied sigh. “All the time Gabby and I spent witnessing to Kendra, she never showed the slightest interest. In fact, at times, she got downright mad at us.”

“But you kept at it. And all that time, God was tenderizing her heart. You won her over to Christ.”

“I’ve never done that before. It felt great.”

“Don’t you think if God can turn someone like Kendra around, He could work things out for two people meant to be together?”