Early the next morning, Callie half-woke to Anthser grooming her cheek. “Sorry,” he murmured. “I should get back to Anverlee, check on stuff.”

“All right,” she said, then scruffed him and dragged him laughing back into her bed. She cuddled him for a few minutes, then released him to go about his day. She fell back to sleep comfortably ensconced in his scent. She’d finally gotten used to “Gracehaven hours”, and it had been a late night.

Callie spent the Sunday quite lazily, by her standards; apart from an hour running an obstacle course and one attending Temple, she did nothing productive whatsoever. Her new partner had no more time for bowracing than Lord Comfrey’d had, and Callie was starting to wonder if she’d picked the wrong career to switch into. Maybe all humans who bowrace are dilettantes. Maybe it won’t matter that mine is.

When she got up on Monday and went down to the felishome kitchen for something to eat, one of her housemates, Felicia, asked, “Hey, is it Anthser of Fireholt that you’ve been seeing?”

“Mm hmm. Why?”

“He’s in the Gazette.” The greatcat pushed the paper over to her. “His lord got kidnapped. Says Anthser almost got killed saving him.”

“What?” Callie snagged the paper, claws tearing the front page as she stared at it in consternation. She tried to scan the article quickly, and couldn’t make sense of what she was looking at. He can’t have been hurt, he was just here yesterday and he was fine then, she thought, nonsensically. Felicia was continuing to talk, but she couldn’t process that, either. Nothing in Paradise made sense any more. “How is he now?” Callie cut to the only question that mattered.

“Lord Nikola? Dunno. Paper said he’s still at the infirmary.”

Callie dug her claws through the Gracehaven Gazette and into the tabletop. “Not Lord Nikola! Anthser!”

“Oh! He’s fine, I think. Gazette said he was poisoned but a healer cured him.”

Callie blinked down at the printed words, and decided it didn’t matter what they said. “I gotta go see him. Anyone asks after me, tell them that,” she said, and dashed out the door.

Anthser was not at Anverlee; the footman on duty said that he was with Lord Nikola at the infirmary. When Callie went to the infirmary, they told her they didn’t have a patient by the name of Anthser of Fireholt.

“He’s not here as a patient. He’s Lord Nikola’s warcat.”

“Oh, Lord Nikola? I’m sorry, he’s not receiving visitors.”

“I don’t want to see him! I want to see his warcat. Look, there’s a black greatcat named Anthser here with Lord Nikola. Can you tell that greatcat that Callista of Southing is here to see him?” Callie pleaded. The attendant looked dubious and put-out, but reluctantly agreed to pass the message along.

She waited almost an hour in the infirmary foyer, pacing back and forth before the great glass windows that overlooked a narrow strip of green lawn and the street, her tail lashing. She suspected her demeanor made the staff uneasy, and didn’t care. Maybe if they’re distraught enough, they’ll finally let Anthser know I’m here just so he can come out and chase me off.

Finally, Anthser emerged from one of the side hallways into the foyer. He looked devastated: head down, green eyes dull, fur half-groomed, cape wrinkled, half-shed fur streaking his flanks with gray. Callie rushed to his side. “Anthser? How are you? The paper said—”

“I’m all right,” he said.

She narrowed her golden eyes at him. “You don’t look it. The paper said you’d been poisoned. And shot.”

“Yeah. Healer got to me in plenty of time. I’m fine.”

Callie rubbed the side of her muzzle against his, then flicked out her tongue to groom his cheek. “Sure you are. And I’m the Queen of Vandu.”

He didn’t respond at first, then sagged into her, leaning hard enough that she had to adjust her footing to avoid losing her balance. Anthser wrapped a foreleg over her shoulders and held himself to her. “It’s been a terrible day. Two days. We got Lord Nik back, but…” He cut himself off, glancing around. No one was particularly paying attention to them, but there were a dozen humans and a couple of greatcats about, attending to their own affairs. “None of this should’ve happened. Curse it. I don’t want to talk in here. Can we go for a walk?”

“Sure.” Callie sidled up next to him and pressed against his flank as they left the building. The street outside wasn’t quiet either, but there was a small park a couple of blocks away. Anthser led the way to it with long quick strides, almost loping. In the early afternoon on a weekday, the park was all but deserted. They slowed as they paced along a path that wound past berry bushes and onto a green lawn. Callie nudged Anthser’s side with her muzzle again. “What’s going on, hero?” she asked, softly.

He flinched at the last word, ears flattening. “Don’t call me that.”

She dropped back a pace, ears canted sideways. “Mrow? Sure, you got it. But you did save Lord Nikola, right?”

Anthser snorted. “Hah. I guess. I got Lord Comfrey into a position where he could save Lord Nik, anyway. But he shouldn’t’ve needed saving. I’m his warcat! I should’ve been there. Stopped the abductors before any of this happened.”

“You’re just one greatcat. You can’t be there all the time.”

“Then what’s the point in me being there at all?” he snarled. “What’s the good of me watching out for him a thousand times when nothing happens if I’m not there for him the one time something does? Curse it!” He took a deep breath. “I know it’s crazy. I know I can’t…I can’t always be there.” He glanced back over his shoulder, towards the infirmary. “I mean, I’m not there right now. If something happened.”

“Hey, nothing’s gonna happen. He’s surrounded by an army of functionaries who wouldn’t even let me through to talk to you.”

“Yeah, well, he was supposed to be surrounded by an army of guards on Ascension night. Lotta good ‘supposed to’ did.”

Callie flattened her ears back. “What happened? I mean, how’d they get to him?”

“Lord Nik left the party early to help a petitioner. Men jumped him when he was heading back on foot.” Anthser growled. “Which he wouldn’t’ve been. If I’d been there.”

“Hey.” She drew close again pressed against his side, and groomed the top of his lowered head. “It’s not your fault.”

“Yes it is. Callie, this is my job. My one job. Keeping him safe. And I blew it. I messed up so badly. I don’t know if anything’s ever gonna make this right.”

“Shh, shh.” She put a paw over his back and licked out stress-shed fur. “It’s all right now. You got him back. He’s fine now.”

Anthser sank under her touch to lie on his stomach on the grass, and whimpered. “No he’s not.”

She stopped. “But the healers, I’m sure they—”

He was shaking his head. “They hurt him real bad, Callie. You don’t understand. The way only humans will hurt each other. Yeah, one of the healers fixed his body, but his mind…”

Callie blinked. “But he’s a mind-healer.”

“He was.” Anthser threw a foreleg over his eyes.

Callie fell onto her haunches beside him, rubbing his back with one forepaw. “But…you…you can’t stop being Blessed. Can you?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything any more.” Anthser got his paws under him and stood. “I gotta get back.”

“Hey, handsome, what’s the rush?” She stepped back as he rose. “We just left. Are you expecting something?”

“I don’t want to leave him alone. Probably shouldn’t’ve come out.” He lifted his head at last, green eyes meeting hers. His whiskers stirred in a weak attempt at a smile. “Uh. I appreciate you coming to check on me, Callie.” She leaned into him, and he met her with an answering nuzzle. “But I…really need to be with him right now. You understand, right?”

She nodded. “Sure.” Although she didn’t feel like she understood at all. Still, it was clear that Lord Nik was more than just an employer to Anthser, and she’d probably feel weird and shaken too if her best friend had just been abducted and…tortured.

So they walked back to the infirmary together, and parted in the foyer with another nuzzle. “I’ll see you soon,” Anthser told her.

Callie smiled for him, and straightened his rumpled cape. “You got it, handsome.”

But she didn’t see him soon.

Callie followed the papers closely for the next several days, trying to piece together what had happened from news accounts since Anthser had been so terse. According to the articles, Lord Nikola had been captured on Ascension night by men who thought they could force a Blessed to cure an untreatable illness. When that plan didn’t work, the abductors captured Miss Wisteria Vasilver in the mistaken belief she was betrothed to Lord Nikola, intending to use her as additional leverage. Miss Vasilver, anticipating this move, arranged her capture so that she’d be followed by several individual greatcats and humans, including Anthser and Lord Comfrey. Most of the greatcats lost her trail, but Anthser and his rider followed her to the ship where Lord Nikola was being held and rescued both of them.

It didn’t sound that bad, really. None of the coverage said exactly what they’d done to try to force Lord Nikola to do what they wanted, but he’d been a prisoner for less than a day. How bad could it have been? Callie remembered Anthser saying, “You don’t understand what humans are capable of.” No, I suppose I don’t.

Two of the abductors had died and one been crippled, when they tried to stop the rescuers. The papers didn’t say who’d killed them, or why the crippled one hadn’t been healed. Callie wondered if Anthser was responsible for any of it. The criminals had shot him and left him paralyzed until the healer got to him. Lord Comfrey’d done the rest of the rescue by himself. No wonder Anthser thought he was the most dangerous person he knew.

Everything about the episode made her fur stand on end. It was hard to imagine her sweet, snuggly Anthser in a fight for his life. Maybe Lord Comfrey could kill people, but surely her laidback lover wouldn’t. Would he?

He’d looked so haunted.

Maybe he had.

Callie posted a couple of notes to him through the mail, to ask how he was doing and find out when would be good to see him next. When she hadn’t heard back after a week, she went to Anverlee in person. She ran a few dozen miles every day anyway; running across Gracehaven to see a friend was scarcely a difficulty.

The gates to Anverlee were closed, and a crowd of people stood or knelt on the sidewalk outside. The gathering surprised Callie, but the mob was peaceful and did not block the gate. She told the Anverlee footman she was there to see Anthser. The man didn’t even leave to verify her story, but simply opened the gate to let her enter. “He’ll be at the gameskeeper’s cottage, with the young lord,” the footman told her, gesturing around the mansion and towards the rear of the property.

There were a lot more greatcats on the grounds than Callie’d scented on any of her previous visits: at least eight adults, plus a handful of greatkittens. She recognized Anthser’s scent, his two co-workers Jill and Gunther, and one of Anthser’s friends from the party, Alice. Most of the greatkittens were Gunther’s, but she didn’t know the other adults. The extra adults weren’t hanging around the felishome, as she might’ve expected, or even gathered together. Instead, they were outside despite the cold bluster of the day, stationed like watchcats, ears up, eyes alert. Alice hailed her as she approached the little cottage behind the mansion. “Hey-o, uh, Carrie?”

“Callie. Hey again, Alice. I’m just here to see Anthser. Everything all right?”

“Mrowl.” Alice’s muzzle wrinkled. “Now’s not a great time. Can Jill help you instead?”

“Uh. No. It’s personal. I guess I can come back.” If there’s ever going to be a good time.

Perhaps the other greatcat had a similar train of thought, because she said, “No, I’ll tell him you’re here at least. Wait here.”

Callie pawed her cloak’s hood up against the cold wind and hunkered down to wait. Combined with her fur, grown in long for the winter, she stayed tolerably comfortable despite the chill in the air.

This time it was only a few minutes before Anthser emerged from the cottage. He met her at the top of the path, whiskers spread in an unconvincing smile. “Mrrr,” he greeted her. “Sorry I didn’t send word. It’s been…” He trailed off. He didn’t look as awful as he had the last time she’d seen him: his fur was properly groomed and his cape clean and neat. But his eyes remained haggard, and his scent was thick with anxiety.

Callie closed her eyes and nuzzled his cheek. “’s all right. Just wanted to see how you were holding up. D’you want me to come back another time?” More and more, she felt like an intrusion in his life.

“No, it’s good to see you.” He snuggled up to her and ducked his head to push against her shoulder beneath the cloak. Anthser purred, a deep thrum as much to ease himself as her. “And Lord Nik’s asleep now anyway. Come to the felishome with me?”

“Sure.” As they crossed the grounds, Callie asked, “What’s with all the greatcats on patrol?”

Anthser shrugged. “Paranoia mostly. Mine and Jill’s. The bastard who abducted him is locked up and there’s no reason to think anything’ll happen now. I know. But after my screw up on Ascension, well. We figure we’d better make some changes. Make sure it’s not all on just one or two of us to keep him safe. I can be the first line of defense, but I can’t be the only one. And with Lord Nik in his current state, we can use the extra greatcats around.”

“’In his current state’?” Callie repeated, puzzled.

“Uh.” Anthser pushed open the door to the Anverlee felishome and stood aside for Callie. “Yeah. He’s…not good. Still can’t hear the Savior. Seeing humans freaks him out…we thought he’d made some progress there and he had Lord Comfrey over this morning.” The black greatcat’s nostrils flared. “That was a mistake. I dunno what that curst ass said to Lord Nik, but I’d’ve never let him in if I’d realized he’d cause trouble. You’d think he could behave for one short call but no—” Anthser cut off his diatribe.

Callie canted her ears back as she stepped into the felishome parlor. She curled up on the main couchbed and watched Anthser follow her inside. “The other mind-healers can’t help him?”

He growled, ears flat and hackles raised, angry enough that Callie scooted backwards on the couchbed in apprehension. “Don’t get me started about that useless, worthless – no. No help at all. Seriously, it’s been one curst human after another. Almost to the point where I don’t want to deal with ’em any more myself. Anyway. The volunteer greatcats are here on Lord Nik’s account.” Anthser took a deep breath and shook out his shoulders and head, forcing his body language back to neutral. “A lot of us owe him, y’know? And not everyone thinks one little gift is enough to square accounts.”

Callie patted the empty space on the couchbed beside her, and was relieved when Anthser rushed to join her. He curled up against her stomach, pressing into her as she looped a foreleg over his torso and groomed his cheek. “Did he cure you once, too?”

Anthser shook his head. “No, not me. My little sister. But it’s not just personal. He’s a good man. Always wanted to do the right thing. You know, after Lady Astraia – she was his great-grandma – died and he became Lord of Fireholt, some folks weren’t sure about him. Because he was only seventeen and he had a reputation as frivolous, you might say. Or debauched, maybe.” Anthser waved a paw in dismissal of the digression. “Anyway, we were walking into the village one day, and we came across a family of greatcats. One of the kittens obviously had something wrong with her, she was walking like a drunk human. She stumbled into me. The dad apologized for her, and Lord Nik asked if she was all right. And the dad said something about the kitten falling and hitting her head a few weeks ago and being off balance ever since. But they can’t afford healing, and she’d get better on her own, right?

“Lord Nik was still on my back, and I could feel him get tense all over. He slid down, all stiff and angry, and he pointed to one of the little stones at the side of the road. ‘Fel,’ he said, ‘Pick up that rock.’ The dad did, looking confused. ‘Now give it to me.’ Lord Nik held out his hand. The greatcat looked kind of offended at all this imperious lord stuff but he dropped the stone into his palm. Lord Nik closed his fingers over it. ‘This is adequate recompense for a healing. Now let me treat your daughter.’

“And then he healed that greatkitten, right there in the middle of the road. Wouldn’t take an eighth of a mark from the family. Just that one little rock.” Anthser stopped, and let his head droop to the couchbed cushion.

Callie supposed nobs could afford to be generous, but it was still an illustrative anecdote. She searched for something constructive to say. “It hasn’t been that long, right? Maybe he’ll, you know. Mend. People do that.”

“Yeah. But it’s so unfair. You know that bastard who did this to him? He thought Lord Nik was greedy. He thought the only reason Lord Nik hadn’t cured his mother was because they weren’t posh. Do you know how wrong that is? It should’ve been – it – it should never’ve happened to him. I wish none of this’d ever happened.” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I just want everything back to how it used to be.”

Callie groomed the top of his head and the backs of his ears, with no idea what to say that might comfort him. “He means a lot to you, doesn’t he?”

Anthser nodded. “We’ve been friends since we were kids. We learned about riding together. And bowracing. We used to leap around the orchard at Anverlee together. We’d try to cross from one side to the next without touching the ground, and he never blamed me if I shook him off by mistake. He trusted me, Callie. Everybody trusted me. And I failed them all.”

She purred for him, soothingly, but he didn’t purr in return. After a few minutes, he straggled to his feet. “I should get back. Uh. Thanks for coming to see me, Callie.” He touched noses with her.

“Sure…” Callie watched him retreat, and wanted to ask when can I see you again?  but she was afraid she already knew the answer. No time is good. “I’ll see you around, all right?”

“Yeah,” he said, but he was already out the door.