Chapter 5

We run hand in hand through the rain. As usual St Mark’s Square is flooded; the water rising to at least a foot. We duck under the arch and into the open doorway. Above the curved doorway, four shiny bronze horses look out over the square as water seeps into the Cathedral behind us, pooling in the well of the dipped mosaic reception. I push the heavy doors closed behind us, shutting out the rain and the vile-smelling sea. I turn to the set of doors ahead, walk up the three marble steps to open them, and look in at the pews and altar. Beside this door is another that leads up to the balcony where the commoners converge for the service.

‘Why are we here?’ she asks.

‘I wanted to show you the Art; just look at this mural above the altar.’

‘I ... can’t.’

‘Why? It’s just a church. It really has no power over our kind.’

‘I’m an evil being, shunned by God.’

‘Lucrezia ...’

I turn and find it is ... Lilly who backs away into the now waist-high water and the rain is her tears; she is the rising water. Quickly it reaches her chin, swallowing her like the gulp of a mastiff, but the tears don’t stop and I sink in the salty liquid as it soon covers my head. I can’t breathe - still my heart convulses at the sight of her lovely corpse floating in the cathedral doorway.

Her blonde hair is seaweed and as I try to swim away I become entangled in its rapidly growing length. My lungs are bursting. I can’t escape. My arms and legs are tied as her herbaceous tresses wrap around me and pull me deep into suffocating death. I am drowning ...

‘Jay. Wait up!’

I turn to see Carolyn running towards the humanities building. I stop, smiling. I am not surprised to see her after two weeks of entering her dreams but I feel strained and tired. I am haunted by unfamiliar desires, my interests seem too fractured, my dreams so strange.

‘Want to go for coffee in the refec?’ she asks. ‘You look like you need some. Rough night?’

‘That would be nice. Yes. I didn’t sleep too well.’

We walk in companionable silence away from Humanities and through the Education block.

‘We’ve not seen much of you the last few nights ...’

‘I’ve been working on my first assignment,’ I explain, though this is untrue. I have spent every night watching her from afar. It is part of my technique to appear distant.

‘It’s not due in for weeks ...’

‘I like to be organised.’

She falls silent. We reach the refectory and enter for the traditional morning coffee. I like food - but I must curb my urges to overindulge - too many times attention has been drawn to the excessive amounts I can eat. I eat what my fellow students eat and no more. I don’t wish to raise questions about my habits, though I’ve let it be known that I have a wealthy father who funds my studies. This allows me to be at least a little eccentric. The girls flock around me - though this is not intentional - I am by any standards quite ordinary looking, but the lust attracts them when it is so heightened. They are like Catholic schoolgirls to a young priest; they feel it is wrong but just can’t help it.

‘Jay?’ Carolyn is looking at me strangely and I realise I am holding a chair out for her.

‘Sorry, miles away!’ I stutter, quickly joining the queue for coffee and breakfast.

The refectory is full of uncomfortable plastic furniture that is supposed to give a young and contemporary feel to the place. I detest the modernity and crave the plush comfort of padded renaissance chairs, and carved oak tables with lace tablecloths. Or even the real class of Art Deco. Modern imitation never quite gets it right.

Carolyn picks up a modest breakfast of toast and jam, while I opt for the full breakfast special, with a large latte. I insist on paying for us both at the till and we sit together at an empty table in the furthest corner I can find.

‘Jay, can I ask you something?’

‘Sure.’

‘What are you doing here?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘You’re a twenty five year old rich guy. You could be in Cambridge or Oxford instead of Manchester. Shit. You probably don’t need to do anything.’

I quietly chew a mouthful of greasy bacon and egg - trying to keep from grimacing at the disgusting, soggy taste - I take great pride in being able to ‘enjoy’ revolting food. I swallow a mouthful of my coffee before answering.

‘My dad said he’d cut me off unless I get a degree.’

‘Harsh.’

‘Not really. I promised I’d knuckle down if he let me travel for a few years. I travelled for six. Fair’s fair.’

Carolyn nods, sipping her coffee.

‘So where did you go for all that time?’

‘Everywhere. You could say I saw the world. I’d love to tell you more, if you’re really interested.’

Her shining eyes tell me how intrigued she is. ‘I’d like that.’

‘How about tonight? I could take you out, somewhere special. Name a restaurant and I’ll arrange it.’

‘Hi guys.’ Steve plops down beside me. His athletic bulk would be intimidating if I didn’t know my own strength. I could push him harder than he could throw a punch. ‘There’s a party tonight at Nate’s. Wanna come?’

My mouth drops open to answer. I’m ready now to send Steve down the road.

‘That’d be great, Steve,’ Carolyn answers, ‘but I can’t make it. My cousin’s having a hen night.’

‘Oh. Never mind. What about you Jay? You up for it?’

‘Sorry, no. I’ve got to meet my dad in town. Cash flow problem.’

‘I get you, mate.’

Just like that we have our first date and I realise that Carolyn is within my grasp. So much so, she lied to spend time with me. I try to catch her eye but she avoids glancing my way, a perfect example of guilty conscience. Things have really moved on. Alice, Dan and Nate enter, followed by Lilly, who is the only one who looks awake.

Nate looks as always like he needs a bath. There is a grubbiness about him that I can’t fathom. Although Nate shares rooms off campus, all of the apartments have hot and cold water. Maybe it is his nose ring that gives the appearance of unseemliness? They queue for food. Lilly and Alice have crumpets and toast, while Nate and Dan have sausage barmcakes; another disgusting form of nourishment I’ve never found appealing. They all have large coffees, except Lilly. Nate stops at the condiment counter and pours a sickly amount of sugar into his.

‘Lilly, come sit with us,’ says Alice, and for a moment they study each other as the question of a blossoming friendship suddenly seems viable. Every day till then, Lilly has eaten and drank alone.

‘I’d like that. Thanks.’ And with this simple invitation she has becomes part of the group.

I study Alice for a moment, my opinion of her somewhat changed. I would never have thought she would be so sensitive. All four students sit at the table I share with Carolyn. Out of the corner of my eye I see Lilly pour a little water from an Evian bottle into a polystyrene cup. Putting her backpack on her knee she searches through her books until she finds and extracts an orange tube that says effervescent vitamins. While the others drink coffee she opens the tube and drops one of the flat discs into the water. It fizzes and bubbles.

‘What’s that?’ Carolyn asks.

‘I try to stay healthy. There are lots of infections flying around campus ...’ She casts a dubious look in Nate’s direction and I choke on a mouthful of coffee. It’s as though she shares my thoughts and opinions of Nate.

‘Yeah. Right. Your body is a temple,’ Dan says, his eyes focused on her full breasts as they press against her pink tee-shirt.

‘Can I cum and worship it, Lilly?’ Nate leers while Dan and Steve laugh.

I tense up. I don’t think Nate is at all funny and I want to hit him, but Lilly just looks at him while calmly raising her fist. She flicks up her middle finger and everyone laughs this time, including me. I meet her gaze and my eyes skitter away as quickly as possible. Yes. I know - guilty conscience.

In order to avoid detection, Carolyn meets me off campus and I drive her in my Saab.

‘This is some car.’

‘My dad let me borrow it. I explained I had a very special date.’

Through the corner of my eye I see her flush with pleasure and my body responds when a certain bulge grows in my Armani jeans. I clear my throat.

‘Like to hear some old fogey music?’ I suggest inserting Mozart’s The Marriage of Figaro into the CD player.

Carolyn giggles when she hears it, but the immaculate voices of tenor and soprano lull me and my libido cools down. I feel her eyes on me and wonder if she has observed how I love the music.

‘You know, it’s really not that bad,’ she says thoughtfully. ‘Don’t understand a word of it, but it’s quite pretty.’

Before I know it I am translating the Italian for her.

‘This one is called Voi Che Sapete. The singer is a teenage boy asking the women of the court “What is the Meaning of Love” ...’

‘It doesn’t sound like a boy singing. It sounds like a woman.’

‘You’re right. It is a Mezzo-Soprano who traditionally sings this role. She’s more likely to be in her mid thirties than her teens too,’ I explain.

She laughs a clear musical throaty laugh. ‘So it’s - a tranny? That’s amazing.’

‘I guess so.’ I laugh with her at the thought.

‘How do you know all this stuff, Jay?’

Then, like all good liars, I tell her the truth. ‘I studied in Florence with my uncle who was a composer and tenor. Sadly he’s dead now.’

‘You can sing? Like this?’

It is my turn to blush a little now. ‘Yes. But nowhere near so well. I’m a little out of practice.’

‘Sing for me.’

‘I might, though not tonight. Did you know that Mozart only wore red when he was composing?’

‘Really? Why?’

‘He said it inspired him. Helped him tune in to his creativity apparently.’

‘How’d you know that?’

‘I asked him.’

Carolyn giggles. If only she knew.

The restaurant is the most exclusive I could find. I order in French for both of us, while Carolyn peeks nervously over her menu at the pale pink and grey décor of Chez Nouveau. She is out of her depth, but that makes my sophistication all the more appealing. We sit in the corner, the Maitre d’ suitably tipped, a single candle burning in the centre of the spacious table. I order champagne and she beams, totally hooked. My goal is almost in sight - it’s too easy, what a disappointment.

‘You’re gorgeous ...’ I tell her.

She blushes and I know that the men she’s dated, Steve included, don’t know how to talk to her like this. Modern man lost his masculinity in the struggle for supremacy with the women around twenty years ago. Until then, it was pretty evenly balanced. As she makes a trip to the ladies’ I send the waiter for the flowers I pre-ordered for her. I know this is cheesy, but it will be a new experience for her. When she returns a bouquet of blood-red roses are waiting. She is completely speechless. I refill her glass and she gulps the champagne down in an attempt to hide her embarrassed delight from the beaming elderly couple at the next table.

‘You’re not like any guy I’ve ever met, Jay.’

The waiter serves our starters on expensive hotel ware and then refills our glasses as he holds one hand behind his back. His silver service training is immaculate.

‘I guess I’m a little old fashioned ...’ I reply once we are alone again. ‘I hope it doesn’t offend you.’

‘No. I think it’s great. I’ve never had anyone open a door for me before. It’s kind of cool. This place is awesome too.’

‘I’m glad you like it.’

The kitchen door swings open as a chef enters with a blazing dish held on a tray. Escargot sizzles and crackles under the hustle of smoke as he passes us.

‘What is this exactly?’

‘Thon Nicoise - Tuna Salad.’ I always enjoy the delicious simplicity of this dish, luxuriating in the subtly peppery dressing.

‘The portions are tiny here,’ she points out as the waiter takes away our plates.

‘It’s called Nouveau Cuisine. Should we stop off for fish and chips on the way home?’

She laughs again but looks at me uncertainly.

‘No. Gotta watch the figure you know.’

If only she could realise that there really is no point.

I kiss her chastely on the back of her hand and she slips back into her halls. It is clear that she is not sure what to make of me. I am far different from the amorous Steve, who takes every opportunity to grope her.

In the dark I wait. One of my extra senses, when I’m tuned into my new lady love, is that I can feel her presence in other places. I can sense Carolyn as she strips away the ‘special’ black dress she wore for me. The warmth and aroma of her flesh clings to my lips. I lick them. The taste of her is intoxicating. It is only now I allow the lust to course through me while my inner eye follows her round like a voyeur watching on a secret camera. I sit on the roof, just above her bed. I float like a junkie, hooked on the eroticism of her nearness.

The bed creaks and she slips gracefully under the sheets. I can almost touch the cotton as it brushes against her naked legs. She sighs. One hand flops above her head, resting on the pillow and then the other hand, the one I kissed so gently, slowly cups one of her perfect breasts. She squeezes her flesh, half sighing, half groaning.

‘Carolyn. My sweet darling!’ My inner eye rolls and, shockingly, I am no longer in Carolyn’s room.

I sit upright on the roof as Lilly sits down at the tiny work desk looking at the blank screen of her laptop. Her room is more cluttered than mine, but tidier than Carolyn’s. She has the delightful habit of putting one long fingernail between her teeth when she is thinking. In her left hand she holds her mobile phone as it rings, silently vibrating against her fingers. She glances at the screen. It says ‘Mum’. Quickly she switches it off and, standing, she begins to undress.

I force my mind back to the sleeping body of Carolyn and I lay back again. My cock aches as I run my inner vision over her shape. For a moment I consider going in and finishing it. But oh no, that would not be satisfactory.

I fly from the roof soaring up into the air like a huge, black eagle. My prey is in sight and the Divine Entity, help me! I enjoy playing with my food far too much to rush in now and gorge.

Instead I will think - remind myself once more of one of my other beauties and revel in the memory of past ecstasy, in order to see me through the night.