Tucker
Emma’s hints were far from subtle. I didn’t speak after that. Every thought I had ended with her silent invitation and my desire to take her up on it. I could still taste her kiss on my lips, and I let myself fall back to that moment, remembering the arch of her back and the moan that crept up the back of my throat.
Any other time, I would’ve left the room and gone outside to get some fresh air, but the pack knew she was here, and being in the same room with her was the only way I could keep her safe. I didn't trust myself enough to leave her, even if the pack couldn't reach the windows. They shouldn't be able to reach her at all.
Only guardians with a human bond were allowed inside. That doesn't mean they won't try.
"So, about earlier," Emma spoke from behind the shower curtain, "what happened? Why did you leave?" She leaned out of the shower for a moment, her body sopping wet.
I tried to drown out the sight of her breasts, the curve of her hips and the playfulness in her eyes. "Did you smell anything when we first came inside?"
Emma mumbled behind the curtain, then said, "The dog pee?"
"Wolves." Just one. "They can’t actually get in here, not without a human bond, but they can protest."
Emma pulled the curtain back to give me a serious glance, soap suds covering the top of her head. "Like you and me, you mean."
I nodded. "Yes."
"Why protest?"
"Because, even though we have wolf skins, we have human hearts. We get jealous, same as everyone else."
"But I don’t understand why they’d be jealous or why you're so protective."
"Every guardian needs a child to bond with, to imprint on—to be our mate." Smooth, Tucker. I exhaled and combed my fingers through my hair. "You know this whole thing with the Earth?"
"Yeah?"
"The reason the Earth cries is because of human machinery. It’s been taking children to restore its essence."
"Why children?"
"What do you mean?"
"It’s something I never understood. Why not take all humans?"
I nodded, if only to myself. "Because of their energy. It’s the Earth’s way of defending itself. If it can get rid of future generations, it can keep history from repeating itself."
"But wouldn’t stealing the ones who are causing the problem make more sense?"
"Only if all humans had the same amount of energy. Adults have used up most of theirs anyway, and the effort the Earth would have to make to steal one adult from his or her bed would cost more than it’s worth. Children don’t fight back."
"The Earth is acting like a damned lion, then?" The words came out in a growl, and I winced at her anger.
"I guess you could look at it like that."
"So what now? If we want to stop the Earth from stealing, where do we go from here?"
"We need to heal it. Sing to it."
"Sing?" Was she laughing? "That’s it?"
"It isn’t as easy as it sounds. We can’t sing without our human companions, and not until after we’ve imprinted."
"There’s that word again. What do you mean by imprinting, and why would you being with me make the other guardians jealous?"
"You remember the images I showed you, the memories I shared with you when you were little?"
"Yes."
"That’s what imprinting is. Think of it as sharing a photo album—small snapshots that sometimes include emotions and sound."
"And the other guardians are upset because you showed me two pictures?"
"They’re jealous because I’m the only one who was able to imprint on someone, and because there are a few of them who think having a human companion can make them immortal."
"Is that true?"
I shrugged. "No one really knows. The guardians who want you for themselves aren’t doing it for the same reasons I am."
"What’s your story, then? Are guardians wolves or humans?"
"Both. I started out as a human who turned into a wolf, but now I’m a wolf who sometimes turns into a man."
"That doesn’t make any sense."
"It will."
Another long pause.
"So, when you were a wolf, was it because of the moon?"
"I’m not a werewolf, Emma, I’m a guardian—they're two entirely different things."
"Then tell me, Guardian, what made you change? And what are you guarding?"
I bowed my head, deep in thought. "You caused me to change."
"How?"
"It’s hard to explain. Without going into all the science behind it, a guardian needs a child to trust him in order for him to change."
"I did trust you. Or at least, I thought I did."
"You weren’t ready."
Emma turned off the shower and peeked through the curtain.
"You weren’t the right age," I explained. "When you were young, you imprinted on a number of individuals—guardian and human alike. It’s the person you keep at the front of your mind after you come of age that matters most."
"And since I imprinted on you... or you imprinted on me, you can change?"
"Because you’ve remembered me this long, yes. In simple terms, the fact you remembered me during my absence is what allows me to shift now."
Emma opened the shower curtain the entire way, her naked form shaking in the cold air. "You need a human—me—to imprint on in order to change, and you need to bond with me in order to sing?"
I averted my gaze. "Close enough."
"It isn’t like you haven’t seen it before," Emma teased, not moving from her place in the shower. "Tucker, look at me."
I knew better than to look at her. Not all of her that is. I knew if I did, we’d have a repeat of what had happened downstairs. I watched her from under my brow. Her skin was a brilliant red from the hot water. She turned her head, shying away from me. Her scent, on the other hand, invited me in. It was easy to see what she had in mind, and it wouldn’t have taken much for me to join her.
"We can’t," I said, handing her a towel.
Emma used the towel to dry off her shoulder length hair. "Why not? You’re a guy, and I’m a girl..."
"You only want to because of what I said. It wouldn’t be right."
"What if I said I want to do it for the sake of wanting?"
I glanced at her and studied her eyes. They were free of fear, softer than they'd been when she was a child. She wasn’t just asking because I’d mentioned our need to bond. She was asking because it was something she wanted—something her body needed me to share with her.
"It won’t be enough," I warned, hugging my arms around her body with the towel between us. "The bond isn’t sexual—not all of it, anyway."
Emma let the towel fall around her ankles as she took my hands in hers, holding them between us. "Come on," she urged, tugging at my arms so I'd follow her into the bedroom. "You can’t tell me I’m the only one in this room... in this house who’s thinking of other things. Right?"
I nodded.
"And we’re doing it for the sake of the Earth, aren’t we?"
I figured it wasn’t the Earth Emma was thinking about, but I nodded anyway.
"Then what’s wrong?" She lifted my chin with her hand.
I felt myself falling into her eyes, lost to the words she’d kept to herself. Even though she hadn’t said anything, her body screamed against my ears. A wave of heat rushed over me as I parted her lips with my tongue, growing hotter when her tongue pushed back.
With one hand still at the nape of her neck, I used the other to unbutton my shirt. The swish of skin on skin made my breath catch. It was a sensation I hadn’t experienced since I’d fallen in love with my own guardian. Even so, the few experiences I did have was far more than Emma's.
And as badly as I wanted to show her what I knew, as terrible as it felt to push her away, I did exactly that. Her playful expression from before was lost behind a glare of disappointment. The same disappointment I’d felt many times before.
I coiled my arms around her before she could back away. Her body tensed, and I could tell she was biting back whatever rage she felt toward me.
It took some coaxing, but I lifted her chin so I could look at her eyes. "We'll get there," I promised, kissing her on the cheek. "But I want you to be ready."
Her eyes darkened as if to say, I am. Deep down, I knew she wasn’t.
"I’m not pushing you away," I said after a moment. "I just want things to feel right between us. We shouldn’t have to rush."
She crumbled in my arms, surrendering, at least for tonight. It wasn’t that I didn’t want her. Gods knew I did. But it was something I wanted her to experience, to remember without regret, and if we rolled into bed at that very moment, I knew she would. She'd regret it then hate me for it even more.
Reaching behind the bathroom door, I handed her a blue robe along with one of my Tee-shirts. As we headed back downstairs, I tried to convince myself I’d done the right thing—even if every ounce of me insisted I hadn’t.