Chapter Nineteen

 

CAM

 

Thea bit her lip in her usual adorable way. “Something’s happening to me.”

And indeed something was.

“You have shifted into your angel-form.” Cam stepped back to drink her in. She looked absolutely stunning.

Her skin glowed with a silvery energy that made her pale skin seem even more snowy and ethereal. Her long rich brown hair fluffed out around her head, swaying around her shoulders as though a breeze played with it. Delicate pearly wings appeared behind her, stretching out into her living room. They were smaller than his but suited to her smaller frame.

“Oh!” Thea darted a look at them in shock. “I have… wings.” She stretched them fully and then pulled them back in sharply.

Cam didn’t answer. The thin silver ring hovering above her head mesmerized him. Her halo. He could barely breathe. She was his natural mate; there was no doubt.

“How do I get rid of it?” Thea said, her eyes wide in panic.

Cam stepped close to her again. When he had first shifted it had been almost frightening—he’d had so much power in and around him that he couldn’t control. “Let it go,” he said softly. “Just imagine the energy drifting away.”

Thea locked onto his eyes and took a deep breath. He watched the glow around her, her wings and her halo fade.

He scooped her up in his arms and held her against his chest until her breathing calmed, his cock stirring at the feeling of her. He ignored it and led her to her couch. He needed to look after her and make sure she understood what had happened.

“What the hell is going on?” Thea asked, her voice shaky.

They sat down and Cam took her hands in his own. “You shifted into your angel-form.”

“But what does that mean?”

“Angels have almost the same physique as humans. We were made to support humans and their world so that our Realm can exist.”

“The Angel Realm relies on the human world?” Thea asked, hesitantly.

“Yes. The more contentment, joy, and good-will in the human world, the stronger the Angel Realm is. The more turmoil and discord in the human world, the stronger the Demon world is.”

“Oh.” Thea lowered her eyes in thought. ”I thought the Angel Realm was Heaven.”

“No, it’s only where angels live. Heaven can be accessed via the Angel Realm, but it is heavily guarded. Living angels do not access it at all.”

Thea nodded.

“An angel has two forms. In our normal form, we look and function like humans, we get hungry, we feel full emotions, we get aroused… but we are still able to draw on most of our abilities. Our angel-form is our angelic form. Having it allows us to access the Angel Realm. It makes us stronger and more connected to the Creator. It also gives us the ability to use our wings and fly.”

Thea nodded. She seemed to have calmed completely. “But why do I have an angel-form? You didn’t tell me that was possible.”

Cam shook his head. “I didn’t know you could shift, Thea. No other Nephilim has that ability.” He paused. “I should tell you that I’ve never heard of a Nephilim having an angel mother and a human father. It’s usually the other way round. You are also unusually powerful and have unique abilities for a Nephilim.”

“Like the levitation and quick healing? Yes, I remember you told me.” Thea blew out an uneven breath. “What does it all mean?”

“It means you’re special,” Cam said, stroking her palms with his thumbs. “I don’t know any more than that right now. You can most likely levitate because you’ve been accessing your wings from your normal form. But now you can shift, you’ll probably need to shift to use your more unique abilities. You’ll need to practice before you go out to hunt again.”

Thea’s eyes narrowed, but he held her scrutiny. He would not allow her to put herself in danger when her powers were all over the place. He would lock her in the apartment before that happened. Finally, she nodded.

He took a breath. “There’s something else. Do you remember I told you about angels mating?”

She squinted her eyes, remembering. “Angels can mate for eternity.”

“Yes. There are two types—”

“Arranged ones and blessed ones,” she interrupted. “I remember.”

“Good. The blessed ones are between two angels who are natural mates. It’s something that cannot be controlled by the Angel Realm; if two angels are natural mates it has been decided by the Creator.”

“Okay.” Thea lifted her eyes in thought. “So how do you know if you’re someone’s natural mate?”

“Remember when you asked me if all angels have halos?

She nodded.

“Well, they do. But only an angel’s natural mate can see their halo.”

Thea frowned. “But I can see yours.”

“And I can see yours,” he replied softly. “We are natural mates.” Various emotions played out on her face as her eyes lowered. “I want to claim you as mine, Thea,” he added, his heart hammering as he admitted something he had realized the first time he kissed her.

Thea looked up at him. “Claim me?”

“It means I want to mate with you.”

Thea opened her mouth, but nothing came out.

“Mating between angels is extremely sacred,” he pressed on. It was his duty to ensure she was aware of everything. “It consists of the exchange of halo energy. After we mate, I would like you to come and live with me in the Angel Realm, for eternity.

Thea’s expression was pained. “I don’t know,” she said, her voice uncertain. “Cam, I want to be with you, I do. But you’ve been gone for four weeks without any warning.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I was trying to get an audience with the Thrones to find out if they’d allow me to take you as a mate. It takes a while to see them. I waited four days and they gave me an appointment three months away. I couldn’t get them to see me any earlier.”

“Wait.” Thea stared at him, her brow furrowed. She pulled her hands from his. “You went to get permission without asking me?”

Cam nodded, confused by her reaction.

“Didn’t you think I’d have an opinion?”

Cam frowned. He wanted to spend eternity with her and had assumed she felt the same. Why wasn’t she happy about his declaration and intentions? She actually looked like she was becoming angry again.

“You can’t control me like that.” She scooted away from him and stood up.

Cam watched her in frustration. “I’m not trying to control you. I wanted to try and speak to the Thrones as soon as possible.”

“Why?” Her blue eyes blazed. “What’s the rush?”

“It’s not easy to get an audience with them. I had to see them straight away.”

“And you didn’t think I should have a say in whether or not I become your mate?” she asked. “Mating is a big deal, Cam. You’re trying to force me into this without giving me time to think.”

Cam’s stomach dropped. She didn’t feel the same away about him. It was obvious. She needed to think about them mating, whereas for him, it was the natural progression of their relationship. Mating with her was something he had the urge to do—he didn’t need to think about it. “I’m not trying to force you into anything.”

“If you had spoken to the Thrones and they had agreed, would I have a choice? Would I be able to say no?”

Cam was taken aback by the question. He hadn’t thought she would say no—they were natural mates. How would he know what the procedure was in that instance?

“Exactly,” Thea stormed, when he didn’t answer. “I can’t just disappear into the Angel Realm. I have a life here, family here; Amber needs me.”

“You can still see your family, Thea. You can visit them whenever you want.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if I can abandon my life to be with you.”

“You don’t trust me,” he said, the realization coming to him at once. It stung harder than the fact she didn’t want to mate with him.

“You left me for—”

“Four weeks, I know,” he boomed. “You’re acting like it was four years. I’ve apologized. I was away for us. So we could be together. Clearly you would rather get yourself killed than be with me.”

“I’ve dealt with men who need their women to be weak in order to satisfy their egos before.” She glared at him, her eyes dark. “I’ve been hurt by them and it will not happen again.”

Cam blinked. It was the first time she had mentioned any past experiences with men and a shot of annoyance and anger surged through him. She couldn’t truly be comparing him to them, could she? “It won’t,” he said, trying to reassure her. “I am not those men.”

“You have manipulated me from the beginning,” Thea said, almost not hearing him. “You made a big gesture of saving me, stopped me from doing jobs or work, put me in this place and told me not to leave, gave me money…”

“I trained you to protect yourself.”

“But you don’t actually want me out protecting myself,” Thea pointed out. “You want to keep me hidden away and tied to you. And of course, the best way to do it is to have me mate with you and make sure I have no choice.”

Cam stood abruptly, an uncontrollable rage building in him. How could she twist his affections for her so bizarrely?

“If you don’t want to be with me, just say it!” he bellowed. “But don’t imply I have forced you into anything. The only thing I wanted was to train you and I’ve done that. If you don’t want to advance the relationship I thought we were having, there’s nothing more for me here.” He stalked toward the door, shifting into his angel-form. When he turned back to her he thought he saw a fleeting expression of panic on her face, but his anger was too overwhelming for him to register it. “Remember to practice your shifting before you go out to hunt again.”

He left her apartment and stood out in the street, seething with rage, frustration, and loss. The crazy thing was he was also extremely aroused by her acute anger and fiery nature. This was fucking torture! Every part of his being urged him to go back in to her, to persuade her, but every time he thought back to her refusal of him the shocking blow hit again. How could he be natural mates with someone who didn’t feel the same way about him? Maybe it was the Creator reminding him of his vow not to take another mate after the death of his intended. He shook his head in confusion. That couldn’t be. The Creator was the one who made them mates. He hadn’t really even thought much about Karaya since being with Thea. Maybe that’s the lesson.

He spread his wings and shot up into the sky with a wild roar. He was alone, as always.