CHAPTER 1
Chi non è meco, è contro a meco.
Looking out her kitchen window Alberta no longer felt as if she was living in a dream. She touched the gold crucifix that never left her neck and was filled with gratitude. Finally, Alberta accepted that this was her reality.
It had taken a while, but at last she had gotten used to the fact that the huge expanse of crystal blue water known as Memory Lake was her permanent view. She no longer felt she was trespassing in someone else’s home every time she looked out her window. Her life had indeed changed.
Sighing, she remembered what the view was like from the kitchen window of the first apartment that she and Sammy rented in Hoboken, New Jersey, when they were first married—the soiled, decrepit brick wall of the tenement next door. A building, so close, that if Alberta climbed into the kitchen sink, opened the window, and stretched her arm, she could touch its rough façade.
Her memories fast-forwarded several years to when she and Sammy had moved to the suburbs and the view from the kitchen window was obstructed by her neighbor’s tall privacy fence, made out of sturdy white plastic, so all she could see while washing the dishes was her own backyard patio and a few feet of grass. She gazed out that window so often that the lightning-bolt-shaped cracks in the cement and the unattractive mixture of green and yellow patches of dried grass were etched into her memory. She often joked that those images were like mental cockroaches and would survive the inevitable dementia that would grip us all in old age. Alberta had always been a “glass half empty” kind of gal at heart, but that—much to her surprise—was slowly changing.
Ever since she moved to Tranquility, a part of New Jersey far different than the urban landscape of Hoboken or even the cluttered and overpopulated suburban towns that dotted the state, it was as if Alberta had absorbed the slower pace of the town and the peaceful nature of its idyllic and panoramic vistas allowing them to rewire her, shift her mind-set, so she could see life differently. Alberta embraced this new energy and felt revitalized. But, just when she had gotten used to her new surroundings everything around her was about to change yet again.
“Look, Lola,” Alberta said. “It’s snowing.”
Miss Gina Lollobrigida, Alberta’s cat, who was almost always referred to as Lola unless she broke some cardinal house rule like flipping over her food bowl or deciding she needed to gussy herself up by wearing Alberta’s lipstick, which as unbelievable as it sounds had happened on more than one occasion, lounged on the linoleum floor in a speckle of sunlight that streamed through the window and purred. Her black fur glistened in the sunshine and the white mark over her left eye stood out even more vibrantly than usual.
Lola was wearing her usual expression—eyes half closed so it appeared that she either knew all the mysteries of the universe or she didn’t care to acknowledge there was information beyond her grasp. She was content staying right where she was, but Alberta would have none of it. Even though Alberta was rather certain Lola didn’t care to know what was happening outside, she was, after all, a doting cat mother and wasn’t going to let Lola miss the first snow of the season. Or, Alberta thought with an acknowledged hint of sentimentality, the first snow of their new lives.
Alberta placed the last breakfast plate in the plastic draining rack to dry, quick-washed her hands on the dish towel, and scooped up Lola into her arms. Lola might not care about the view, but she would most certainly care about being grabbed by two wet hands.
“Isn’t that bellissima, Lola?” Alberta cooed.
Lola let out a long, sultry purr that Alberta chose to believe meant that her cat agreed with her wholeheartedly. And how could she not? The world right outside her window could pass for a scene from a holiday movie like White Christmas, Holiday Inn, or Alberta’s favorite, Meet Me in St. Louis.
She parted the red and white plaid curtains that had recently replaced the more summery yellow and white gingham window dressing and smiled. Sure, she might be sixty-five years old, but Alberta Ferrara Scaglione felt like a kid again. Although Alberta had lived her entire life as a skeptic, not imagining life could get much better, she was forced to admit that there was magic in the ordinary.
“La prima nevicata,” Alberta gushed. “The first snowfall.” She nuzzled Lola closer to her cheek and the cat squirmed delightedly. “Our first snowfall.”
Even though Alberta had only moved to Tranquility in the past year, she had visited the town when she was a young girl. However, those trips were always during the summer months so this was the first time she’d be spending winter here. That meant she was about to celebrate another first—her first winter season in her new home.
No, the landscape had not yet turned into a winter wonderland, but a transformation had begun. The oak trees in the backyard had lost all of their leaves, the spindly ends of their bare branches reaching up to the sky like greedy oversized children eager to be replenished. The bushes were still green and full, but they’d lost their luster and were littered with brown spots. The biggest change, of course, had to do with the lake.
Memory Lake was huge, flat, and blue, deceivingly simple adjectives that didn’t quite describe its majesty. Now as a light smattering of snow fell in perfect vertical lines, too numerous to count, and disappeared onto the surface of the water it was as if the heavens were feeding the lake and offering it nourishment for the harsh weather that was surely to come.
The snow that fell wasn’t sticking, but evaporated the moment it touched lake water like an emotion that couldn’t be maintained once it was acknowledged. But like all strong emotions, the snow would return, and the next time it would probably stay a little bit longer.
Alberta didn’t know how long she remained in front of the kitchen window, swaying side to side and softly humming “Micio Miagolio,” an old Italian children’s song about a hungry kitty cat who doesn’t share her meal, and one of Lola’s favorite lullabies, when she heard the phone ring.
Holding Lola expertly in one arm like a sleeping newborn baby, Alberta picked up the phone out of its cradle. “Hello.”
“Hi, Gram, it’s me, Jinx.”
“Lovey!” Alberta squealed. She was always excited to hear her granddaughter’s voice. But whenever she heard her granddaughter’s voice unexpectedly on the other end of the telephone she grew concerned. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh my God!” Jinx shouted. “You have got to stop assuming something is wrong when I call!”
“Ah, Madon! I’m an old lady, we always assume the worst.”
“First of all, you’re not old. And second of all, knock it off!”
Alberta smiled and loved that she and Jinx had grown so close in the past year that they could yell at each other good-naturedly. There was an easy back and forth to their conversations filled with mutual respect, nothing like the conversations Alberta once had with her own daughter, Jinx’s mother Lisa Marie, which were knock-down, drag-out fights overflowing with hatred and words that were carefully chosen to wound and degrade. Alberta shuddered, not only at the memory, but at her role in shaping it. Whether those arguments were the result of conscious or subconscious thought didn’t matter, Alberta had a starring role in them and there was no way she could take back any of the words that had spewed out of her mouth or wash away the shame she’d felt ever since. All she could do was look back in regret and look forward with hope. If she couldn’t reconcile with her daughter, she could at least make amends by creating a life with her granddaughter.
“Alright, basta, let me start over,” Alberta said. “To what do I owe this surprise phone call?”
Ignoring her grandmother’s attempt at sarcasm, Jinx replied, “I want to meet for dinner tonight.”
That’s all? Alberta thought. “Of course, I’ll defrost a lasagna. And I have some leftover stuffed peppers. And you like shrimp scampi, don’t you? I made too much last weekend.”
“That all sounds delicious, Gram,” Jinx said. “And can you invite Aunt Helen and Aunt Joyce to join us?”
“Of course,” Alberta replied.
Ever since moving to Tranquility, Alberta hardly ate a dinner without her sister Helen or her sister-in-law Joyce so at first she didn’t think the comment strange, but then she realized it was odd for Jinx to make a special request to invite the entire family to dinner. Something had to be wrong.
“Jinx, what’s going on? Why do you want us all to have dinner together?”
“Because I have super fabulous news to share!” Jinx cried. “I’ll see you at seven.”
Jinx hung up before Alberta could question her further to find out exactly what her super fabulous news was. Not to worry, instead of asking Jinx she would ask the other members of her family.
* * *
“What could be so important that Jinx needs to gather us all together at a formal dinner so she can make an announcement?” Alberta queried the room.
Helen and Joyce were sitting around the kitchen table munching on Entenmann’s raspberry-filled Danishes and sipping raspberry-flavored vodka, a sort of appetizer to the evening’s meal. They had been discussing what Jinx could possibly want to tell them, but thus far hadn’t come up with any realistic answers. They did, however, have many questions.
“Did she say she was bringing anyone with her?” Joyce asked.
“No,” Alberta replied shaking her head. “She only said she’d meet us here for dinner at seven.”
Munching on a piece of Danish, Helen said, “It has to do with a man.”
“Why do you say that, Helen?” Joyce queried.
“Because whenever a woman wants to have a powwow with other women it always has to do with a man.”
“That’s a little old-fashioned, don’t you think?” Joyce retorted. “Jinx is a young, independent woman starting her career as a reporter, she doesn’t base her self-worth on another man.”
“I’m not sure that’s entirely true,” Alberta declared. “She has grown very fond of Freddy.”
For the past few months Jinx had been dating Freddy Frangelico, the local snorkeling instructor, and the two of them had grown extremely close. Alberta wholeheartedly approved of Freddy and considered him an ideal boyfriend—he was courteous, respectful, handsome, and, most important, he made Jinx happy. But there was a lot about him that Alberta didn’t know so the fact that Jinx’s announcement could involve Freddy made Alberta anxious.
“You don’t think they’ve gotten engaged, do you?” Without waiting for a reply, Alberta chugged her glass of raspberry vodka for emotional support.
Joyce placed a well-manicured hand to her mouth and her eyes widened so even if she wanted to hide her surprise at Alberta’s comment, her body language gave her away. “Berta, I never thought of that. He’s a nice kid and all, but also too, they just met.”
Helen broke off another piece of Danish and said, “Maybe they have to get married.”
“Of course they have to get married,” Alberta replied. “They’re in love.”
Joyce patted Alberta’s hand gently and clarified the statement. “I think what Helen means is that they may have to have to get married.”
Confused, Alberta looked from Joyce to Helen for more explanation. When Helen spoke, Alberta got more than she ever expected.
“Jinx might be in the family way!”
Typically, if anyone brought a conversation to a screeching halt, it would be Helen. However, this comment and its not-at-all-subtle implications not only brought the conversation to an abrupt stop, it caused Joyce to refill all their jelly glasses with more raspberry vodka. When their glasses were once again empty, Alberta was the first to find the courage to speak.
“Jinx would never . . . she’s a good girl.”
“Oh, Berta,” Helen chided. “This has nothing to do with being good or bad. Unmarried women get pregnant all the time even if they take precautions. Remember Cousin Louise?”
“The one who married that mechanic,” Alberta replied.
“The one who had to marry that mechanic,” Helen corrected.
Shock took over Alberta’s expression, like a grenade exploding in the middle of a field of daisies. “Louise got married because she was pregnant?” Alberta asked, flabbergasted.
“They would’ve gotten married anyway and they stayed married until death did them part,” Joyce explained. “So it didn’t make any difference, but yes, the reason they got married was because Louise was pregnant with little Jeannie.”
“And Gumpa Marco’s daughter, Angela?” Helen continued. “She wasn’t putting on weight, she was pregnant, which is why Gumpa Marco shipped her off to Sicily to marry her third cousin, Giuseppe, before she started to show.”
“That marriage didn’t end as well,” Joyce added. “Let’s just say Angela was never cut out to be a fisherman’s wife.”
“Who among us is, Joyce?” Helen asked, knowingly. “Who among us is?”
“Ah, Madon!” Alberta shouted. “How many other girls got pregnant when we were younger and had to get married?”
“Tons!” Helen replied.
“How come I never knew about any of this?” Alberta asked.
Cutting off yet another slice of Danish, Helen explained, “You never wanted to see the world for what it really was when we were kids. That’s why it hit you so hard when you were an adult, you didn’t prepare yourself like I did.”
Alberta didn’t want to contradict her sister and open up a can of worms, but Helen was wrong. From a young age Alberta realized life was far from the proverbial bowl of cherries, and it took her until she moved to Tranquility to understand that it was filled with hope and promise. However, Helen was right about Alberta being naïve when it came to controversial subjects like unwed pregnancies and girls not behaving like the good little girl Alberta was taught to be. She wasn’t ignorant that such things occurred, but she didn’t dwell on them so the thought that Jinx could be pregnant and planning a quickie wedding was the furthest thing from her mind.
When Jinx burst into the kitchen it was the first question out of her lips.
“Jinx, are you pregnant?” Alberta asked.
“What?”
Greatly relieved, Helen and Joyce let out a collective sigh.
“I guess that settles that,” Helen declared.
Not convinced, Alberta pushed Jinx for a real answer. “Well, are you, lovey? It doesn’t matter if you are or if you aren’t, we will support you either way, but please just say it, are you or are you not pregnant?”
Throwing her coat on the hook of the hutch next to the front door, Jinx shook her head—simultaneously bemused and annoyed by her grandmother—and bent down to greet Lola. “I am definitely not pregnant.”
“Thank God!” Alberta exclaimed as she kissed her gold crucifix, looked up to the heavens beyond the ceiling, and made the sign of the cross.
Standing up, Jinx buried her face into Lola’s stomach making the cat purr in sheer delight. Replacing her fingers with her face to continue playing with Lola’s tummy, Jinx said, “I thought you said it would be okay if I were pregnant?”
The three women answered in unison: “We lied.”
Laughing hysterically, Jinx sat down in the empty seat at the kitchen table. “Well, that’s good to know so I can plan accordingly if I should ever find myself in that situation, but why in the world would you think I’m pregnant?”
“Because you called us here for a very important meeting,” Alberta replied.
“And you said you had fabulous news to share,” Joyce added.
“So Berta assumed you got yourself into trouble,” Helen lied.
“That is not true!” Alberta shrieked.
Jinx and Joyce smiled at each other as Alberta and Helen continued to argue over who was the first one to bring up the idea that Jinx could be with child until Lola meowed so loudly it made them all stop and remember that they still hadn’t learned the truth as to why Jinx called this impromptu dinner.
“If you aren’t pregnant, what’s your news?” Alberta asked. “Are you engaged?”
“No!” Jinx cried. “Why does your mind automatically go to marriage and pregnancy—and not necessarily in that order—when I say I have some good news?”
Shrugging her shoulders, Alberta replied, “Because I’m Italian. The best news is always about weddings and babies.”
“Well, my news has nothing to do with a man,” Jinx asserted. “It has everything to do with me.”
“Good for you, Jinx,” Joyce said, raising a glass of vodka.
Alberta felt ashamed that she had assumed her granddaughter’s good news could only be tied to a man. But after spending decades playing second fiddle to all the men in her life, whether she was coerced into the role or entered into it willingly, it was a hard habit to break.
“Good for you, lovey, and I’m sorry for jumping to the wrong conclusion,” Alberta offered.
“Thanks, Gram,” Jinx said. “Technically my news isn’t only about me, but all four of us.”
The women exchanged looks that ranged from surprised to concerned to exasperated.
“Basta!” Helen shouted. “I am no longer a woman of the cloth and do not need to adhere to a vow of nonviolence. Tell us your news before I clobber you! The suspense is killing us.”
“Okay, but before I tell you I need to know one thing,” Jinx declared.
“What?” Alberta asked.
“Chi non è meco, è contro a meco,” Jinx said very slowly, overenunciating her words.
Again, the three older women looked at each other with expressions that now ranged from bemusement to alarm to utter amusement because Jinx sounded like she was channeling Woody Allen channeling Marlon Brando.
“Do you mean to say, are you with me or against me?” Helen translated.
“Yes!” Jinx squealed. “That’s exactly what I said.”
“Well, not exactly,” Joyce corrected.
Alberta leaned back in her chair and spread out her arms to her sides, “What kind of pazzo question is that? We’re always with you.”
“Even if you were having a baby out of wedlock,” Helen said. “We might not be with you from the get-go. . .”
“But we’d get there very quickly,” Joyce added.
“So tell us, lovey,” Alberta pleaded. “Whatever it is, we’re with you one hundred percent.”
“Good!” Jinx beamed. “Because I might not be having a baby, but start packing your bags because the Ferrara ladies are going on a vacation!”