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“I need you to do me a favour,” Ankou said as he walked into the room.
I took my shot before reacting, easily potting the red. “What?” I asked as I straightened up.
“My father will be having visitors soon and he needs someone to guide them through the underworld. He has asked me, but I’m going to be busy.”
“Really,” I said, raising my eyebrows. “Doing what exactly?”
Ankou ignored the question. “Some guy is coming down from Earth to reclaim his girlfriend and it seems that the family have agreed to put a few obstacles in his way as a test to make sure he is worthy, or something like that.”
I suddenly became interested in what my cousin was saying. “You mean human visitors?”
Ankou nodded, grinning. He knew that would get my attention. “And apparently he is bringing a young woman with him.”
“Let me get this straight,” I said, thinking I must be missing something. “A real live human woman is coming to visit us in the underworld and you don’t want to meet her?” Ankou goes through women like water so passing up the opportunity to show her around was not like him.
He shrugged. “I never said I wouldn’t meet them. I just don’t want to spend a few weeks with them. What if she’s ugly? I don’t want to be stuck being her escort when I can be enjoying myself up on Earth.”
I shook my head, though his words did not surprise me. “You really are shallow, you know that.”
He grinned. “You forgot to mention charming, stunningly good looking and absolutely irresistible to the fairer sex.” If anyone else had spoken like that about themselves I would have assumed they were joking. Ankou wasn’t; he really does have that high an opinion of himself. Unfortunately it is justified. I know women find me reasonably attractive, but I might as well be the elephant man whenever Ankou is around.
“What would I need to do?” I asked in resignation. Ankou would never do what was being asked and I couldn’t let my uncle down.
“I don’t really know much,” Ankou admitted. “Dad is in his study, waiting for you.”
“Am I really that predicable?” I asked as I handed over my cue.
“Reliable, not predictable.”
I made my way through the castle, knocking on Death’s open study door as I entered.
“That didn’t take long,” Death said. “I was expecting Ankou to take much longer to persuade you to fill in for him.”
I shrugged my shoulders as I took a seat in front of the desk. “To be honest, I’m getting a little bored. I’ve nothing better to do, so why not help you out?”
Death smiled at me. “I wish my son was more like you,” he told me sincerely. “It’s about time he did something other than bed as many different women as he can. He needs to start taking some responsibility.”
“You’re preaching to the choir, uncle. So what exactly do I need to do?”
Death stood up and walked around the desk, taking a seat next to me, much to my relief. He was dressed in a light grey suit and being the other side of the desk had made me feel like I was a customer talking to my bank manager instead of a young man talking to my uncle.
“Not much. Rob and Rachel will be arriving through the cave entrance on the evening of December 4th.”
“The next solar eclipse.”
“Correct. Pick them up in the boat and take them to see your grandfather first. He has agreed to let them stay the night at his place. In the morning, show them the tower blocks. They should know what really goes on down here.” I nodded my agreement. It is important that visitors should see all of the underworld, not just the good parts. “Then take them to see your uncle Len, but take the long route, past the mountains where the ogres live. Perceval has agreed to kidnap the girl and your grandfather wants to see if Rob will be brave enough to rescue her.”
“No problem.” It would be good to catch up with Perceval.
“I have no idea what Len has planned for them,” Death said, “but once they have passed his test, take them to see Fam, then your father. They each have tests for our visitors to pass, but have not let on to me what those tests will be. Once all tests are over and done with, you will bring them here. If they fail any they will be sent straight home.”
“Anything I should know? Anything I should or shouldn’t tell them?”
Death shook his head. “No. You can guide them wherever you want to, as long as you end up in the right places. But you cannot help with any of the challenges and that includes getting between their destinations. No transporting them.”
“Alright.” At least I now knew why the journey would take a few weeks. “Want me to provide food and accommodation?”
Death nodded. “Tents will do. And catch food when you can. I don’t want you creating too much out of thin air for them.”
“What do you know about them?”
“They are both studying at university. They are very good friends and have known each other since they were young. Rachel’s parents were killed in a car crash earlier in the year, so I am surprised she is making the journey.”
“And why exactly do you have Rob’s girlfriend?” Despite the myths and legends, Death had never kidnapped anyone before.
He shook his head. “Trust me, you do not want to know.”
I stood up, knowing that he would tell me no more. “Let me know if anything springs to mind that I should know about before I meet them.”
Death nodded. “I would appreciate it if you checked in with me regularly, to let me know of their progress. You can also let the rest of the family know when to expect them, if you don’t mind.”
“I will,” I said, then left the room.
“Well?” Ankou asked as I walked back into the snooker room.
“Looks like I am going to be a tour guide for a while.”
“When do you leave?”
“A couple of days.”
“Good,” Ankou said, placing the cue he had been playing with onto the table. “That gives us plenty of time to have some fun before you get too busy. Fancy a trip up to Earth to meet some ladies?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
I shook my head. “Not this time. I’m off home to let my family know what I have been roped into doing.” Before Ankou could protest, I vanished.