Chapter 40

Was it day, night, winter, summer? Raven didn't fucking know. And he didn't give a shit either.

Ever since Cole deserted him, dropped his ass back in the mortal realm, he’d been slumped in the same frickin’ armchair, going through the motions of existing without actually living.

Is she okay? The question plagued him countless times a day, and each time it arrived in his head, his heart ripped open all over again.

He threw back another shot of tasteless bourbon, the alcohol having long ago lost its desired effect.

A shimmer of power rippled through Raven’s bedroom and he turned his head to find Gabe standing on the balcony, facing the pine trees, his golden wings folding away.

Raven eased the empty glass down on the floor beside his feet; his knees and back creaked as he rose from the armchair. He rested his hand on the side table and stilled for a moment, waiting for the room to cease spinning.

He stumbled through the empty bourbon bottle obstacle course, shoving one aside with his bare foot, and pulled open the French doors. Crisp air caught his breath as he joined Gabe on the balcony. Bitter wind howled through the pine trees, their tops swaying like they too had been on one helluva bender.

Raven put his forearms on the chunky wood railing, squinting up at the deep purple and grey clouds.

“Good evening, my friend,” Gabe sighed, staring out toward the forest.

“Is it? Good, I mean?”

Raven's gaze traveled over the snow dusted outer branches of the pine trees, down over the small powdery mounds scattered on the deserted garden beds. The remaining flowers were brown and droopy, suffering a slow and miserable death.

I know how they feel.

“How long has it been?” he croaked.

“Long enough, my friend. It is time.”

“So everyone keeps saying.” He peered at Gabe, who slung his navy checked blazer over the railing and used one hand to loosen the tie at his neck. “Have you seen her?” Raven asked.

Gabe’s gaze lowered, and he shook his head.

Raven clenched his jaw. “You're an Archangel, Gabe, how could you not have seen her?”

“These things take time, Raven, you know that. And time itself moves differently there. Right now, it's as if she's only just arrived.”

His ribs tightened, squeezing the air from his lungs. Inhale…exhale…inhale.

Gabe’s firm hand squeezed Raven’s shoulder and chased away the rage bubbling underneath his skin.

Nothing’s going to fill the hole she left behind.

“Fate sent her for me, didn't she?” he choked. “To restore my faith.”

Gabe slowly nodded. “As I understand, yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Raven, you know Fate’s power doesn’t work like that. You had to choose. She may pave a multitude of paths, but the individual must choose which direction to follow. You had to choose Tayla.”

Raven shoved his fingers through his disheveled hair. “God. Why didn't I bloody listen to you in the beginning? I could have had more time with her.” His voice broke, and he leaned his elbows back on the railing. “Why couldn’t Fate have given me more time?”

“Each moment is a memory to cherish, my friend, however fleeting.”

Raven scoffed. Gabe and his fucking positivity.

“I loved her more than she could ever know.”

Gabe’s shoulders dropped. “Which was the whole point.”

Moments of silence past between them. Raven inhaled the bland air. The earthy fragrance from the pine trees and the smoky wood fire scent puffing from the chimney had vanished from the air, having died along with her.

Gabe turned toward Raven, leaning one elbow on the railing. “Why have you not cleared the air with Raine?”

Raven shook his head. “I know it wasn’t her fault. I just can’t. I’m not fit for company at the moment.”

“She needs your guidance, Raven. Try not to forget your reason for being in this realm in the first place. Only you can lead this mission, and you must maintain the strength in your entire team.”

Raven turned, pointing toward the armchair inside his room, the indent of his ass still creased in the seat. “I can't even bring myself to get out of that fucking chair. How do you expect me to lead them?”

The corner of Gabe's mouth twitched, and he straightened his shoulders. “Well, my friend.” He motioned to Raven’s bare feet. “You've just taken the first step. Now is time.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because I have faith in your abilities as their leader. Faith you will complete the mission you set out to do all those centuries ago. I have faith in you, my friend.” Gabe stepped beside Raven and peered into the trashed bedroom. “Don’t let Tayla’s Chosen path, and her resulting sacrifice, be for nothing.”

Raven examined the shitty room through the open doors.

The vacant chair he'd parked in for so long. The Glock he’d vowed to Cole he wouldn’t use rested on the side table, the empty bourbon bottles littered across the carpet, and the trays of uneaten food someone kept delivering.

Raven’s chest tightened as his gaze lingered on the bed. The bed he'd shared with Tayla. Where they'd made love for the first time, which now felt like centuries ago.

Suddenly, something inside him, deep down, shifted. Clarity seeped in, like headlights in the distance slowly coming into focus on a foggy night.

He’d arrived at his metaphorical fork in the road; his destiny paving two paths for him again.

Thanks a fucking lot, Fate.

He could either continue on a bender of self-destruction and self-pity, drink himself into a stupor every day, and forget about the outside world. Forget any of that horror even happened, and forever live in the memories of her.

Or he could sober the hell up and get his shit together. Complete the mission he’d set out to do all those centuries ago—save Blaine and wipe all the Fallen from the face of this earth. Then, he could return to the Heavens. No big deal.

But when he stopped and considered his two paths, the one choice he could make to influence his own destiny, the decision was easy. Only one path reunited him with Tayla.

Straightening his shoulders, he faced Gabe. “What do you need me to do?”

The corners of Gabe's mouth lifted in a slow smile. “First, we need to get you showered and tidy that disaster you call your room.”

Gabe meticulously rolled up the sleeves of his black, immaculately pressed business shirt, as if preparing for a long night of board meetings.

Raven took a deep breath and stepped across the threshold into his bedroom, sealing his decision.

He would not forget her. No fucking way. His heart would bleed for the rest of his existence. But right now, in that moment, he vowed to follow through with her final wish. He would save Blaine.

And after that, he would reunite with Tayla, his soulmate, and love her for the rest of eternity.

****

The legs on Raven's chair scraped against the wood floor as he pushed out from the table, the ear-piercing screech echoing in the silent room. He crossed the study to pause at the full-length window. Folding his arms across his chest, he peered out at the far side of the gardens.

In the distance, among the thick forest of pines, he spotted a slim figure bolting through the trees. Raine. Dressed in all black, a silver weapon gleamed in her hand, she darted this way and that before she gripped a protruding branch and effortlessly swung herself up into the foliage, to nestle against a thick trunk.

She’d pulled that stealthy move on him a few times, too.

A few hundred feet behind her, a much larger figure in a black tee and jeans gave chase. Gaining. Aric, completely unaware of the pending ambush just up ahead.

Raven grinned. Good luck with that, brother.

Raven turned back to face the empty seats at the board table. The other Guardian’s had departed maybe an hour or so before. Raine and Aric off to train, EJ headed to the gym and River intent on catching some rays.

It’d been one month, twenty-two days, nineteen hours and—glancing over at the antique clock on the side table—about thirty-four minutes, since he'd lost her, and today, he just wasn't into it. His body was physically here, but his mind, his soul, were absent, MIA on the search for its mate. It wasn't the first time he'd had a moment like this or a day. He wasn't about to send himself on another bender, he just needed some time alone.

He leaned against the wall and absently brushed his thumb over the fresh ink on his left pec; Tayla’s name scripted across his heart.

His permanent reminder.

Each night, Raven had led patrols, being the first one to arrive at the agreed location and the last one to leave. He told the others it was to boost their numbers; the more of them out there, the better protected they were. But, of course, that was a load of bullshit. Well, it was true, just not exactly the whole reason for his new found over-achieving enthusiasm to wipe the Fallen from the face of this earth.

Patrols were a helluva lot more productive than lying in his cold bed alone or wandering the halls to catch Tayla’s lingering scent—which was fading too goddamn quickly.

Since the bonfire, Fallen sightings, even on the outskirts in the smaller, dodgier type clubs and bars, had decreased. Like they took a vacation or some shit and that was just his luck. The time he could use a fight, a distraction, anything, they were AWOL. He hadn't run into Blaine recently either, and considering he’d popped up almost fucking everywhere, his absence made Raven suspicious. The last time he'd sensed Blaine's presence was the night when…well, on that night.

Raven’s ribcage closed in on his lungs as though someone decided to sit on his chest.

Pushing off the wall, he crossed to the mahogany board table to lean on the edge with both palms. Even if the Fallen were off sipping cocktails on a tropical island—no, skinny dipping in a pool of lava was probably more their style—he sensed the war between the two sides escalating. He and his brothers needed to use this little breather to their advantage, to get on the front foot for a change, rather than patrolling each night and reacting to whatever situation they found.

He studied the map of the Snowy Mountains spread open in the center of the table. It detailed Summit Creek Dam, the main town of Summit Creek, locations of various ski resorts, and the four major roads leading in and out. Aric marked Fallen sightings with a red circle, a cross through the center if they were taken out—which happened more often than not. Frequently visited places identified by the larger number of red circles.

Raven stood back with his arms crossed and studied it closer. There had to be something they were missing. He grabbed a pencil lying on the table and bent down, drawing a straight line from one red circle to the next until—

His mouth fell open. No fucking way.

“Rave!”

His head shot up to find EJ peeking around the door jamb, earphones dangling out the top of his charcoal hoodie, a bottle of water in his hand.

“You ready to have your world rocked?” EJ smirked.

“What?”

EJ winked before disappearing out of sight. “You’ll see,” he called out. “Any minute now…” His voice trailed off as he continued down the hallway.

What the hell was EJ talking about now?

Awareness shivered down Raven’s spine and he jerked upright. The pencil fell from his hand and bounced on the floor.

He held his breath as a faint connection stirred inside, reignited, increasing in intensity and strength as it weaved itself back together. At the same time, the weight of his grief lifted.

No…it can’t be.

He raced to the window and peered out toward the gardens as heavenly light faded, revealing a female sitting back on her knees in the center of the lawn. A soft glow encased her body. Her head lowered in her hands. Beautiful chestnut wavy hair tumbled over her shoulders, loose strands blowing across her face in the wind.

Raven’s brain dissolved into mush. He couldn't think, couldn't process what happened.

His soul caught on first and screamed at him, as though it clued in light years before his head managed to connect the dots.

It looked so much like her. He sensed it was her. But how…

She lowered her hands into her lap and lifted her gaze toward the house, to the very window he stared from, like she somehow sensed him, too.

His knees weakened, and he steadied himself with his hand on the window sill to stop from falling on the floor. Then his head finally caught up.

Tayla.

Raven barreled out of the study and down the hall, leaping down the stairs, and throwing open the front door with such force it ripped off the hinges.

Should have jumped out the fucking window.

Crossing the entrance and gravel drive in a second flat, he raced over the dewy grass to her. His knees gave out, and he collapsed in front of her.

Her narrowed hazel eyes stared at him, her eyebrows knitted as though she had no clue where she was. Or who he was.

“Tayla?” he whispered, leaning forward, taking her hands in his.

A heartbeat later, her eyes widened. “Ra…” She cleared her croaky voice. “Raven?”

“Yes, honey, it's me.” He tucked her windswept hair behind her ear. Well, tried to, as the wind blew it back in her face a second later.

“She did it.” Tayla squeezed his hands. “She actually did it.”

“Who? Did what?”

She grinned, lighting up her clear hazel eyes, which were so much brighter than he remembered, more beautiful than the pictures in his head.

He brushed her cheek with his thumb.

“Fate. She sent me back to you.”

His hand froze. No. Fucking. Way.

Tayla laid her warm palm on top of his. Warm hand. Not cold.

“She brought me back to you, Raven,” she whispered.

His heart sank through the earth below his knees. Was this another one of Fate’s sick jokes? He shook his head. “No. Tayla, please tell me you didn’t bargain with Fate.”

She chuckled. “I sure did.”

He squeezed her shoulders to get her attention. “Tell me what she said. Exactly what she said. Every goddamn word.”

“I’m immortal now, like you.” She frowned. “Aren’t you happy?”

“Of course, I am.” He cradled her jaw in his palms and lightly brushed his thumbs over her cheeks. “It’s just…Fate has a way of manipulating choices. Using them to her advantage.”

“Well, if she uses returning me to you to her advantage, then so be it. I would choose you every single day. Who cares why she did it.”

Raven exhaled a long breath. “Are you sure? What about your parents? I can’t ask you to give up being with them.”

She smiled. “I’m going to save that reunion until we return together. They would have wanted me to follow my heart, and that’s exactly what I did. Now stop talking and kiss me already.”

He didn't know what the hell was going on, or how long it would last. What he did know was he had at least one more moment with his soulmate, and he would take Gabe’s advice and cherish every second of it.

He lowered his voice. “I'm gonna do more than kiss you.”

He rose to his feet and helped Tayla up. In one swift movement, he tucked one arm under her knees and the other across the back of her shoulders, lifting her. With his precious cargo cradled safely in his arms, he turned and beelined for the house. For his room. Their room.

Tayla giggled, “I can walk, you know.”

“I know, but it seems right for me to carry you. You know, across the threshold into our new beginning.”

Tayla touched his cheek with her hand. “Every choice I’ve made has led me to you. We were destined to be together.”

He smiled down at her, unable to form a reply.

Out of the corner of his eye, he caught everyone standing on the edge of the lawn. Everyone, that is, except Raine. EJ casually stood beside the splintered front door, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his faded jeans, a mile-wide grin and a “ta-da” expression on his face.

Tayla glanced around his shoulder and waved to the others as he stalked past them; a chorus of “Hi” and “Welcome back” sang out. But they could wait for later tonight. Scrap that; they could wait until tomorrow. Or next week.

His shoes crunched along the gravel drive, coming to a halt at the far side of the house. He extended his wings and leaned his head down to take Tayla's lips in a fevered kiss as he shot up, landing with a heavy thud on his balcony. Their balcony.

Tayla leaned her head back and brushed her thumb along his lower lip. “Fate said you missed me,” she teased.

His heart hammered against his chest. Every century in the mortal realm had led him to this moment. Tayla was the reason for his existence, the strength and source of his faith, and he planned to worship her every single day that followed.

For the first time in god knows how long, he looked forward to the future. Looking forward to the sun rising on a brand new day.

She made him whole.

“Honey, you have no idea,” he murmured before kicking open the French doors, heading straight for their bed.