I parked Old Betsy a couple of houses down from 13 Oglethorpe Avenue, where Claire was waiting. We hadn’t seen each other since my fall break, when we had spent a morning catching up over breakfast at The Lady & Sons in the City Market. She was already looking tan, and it was just May. She looked like a real real-estate agent in her seersucker pantsuit and strappy pumps. I walked toward her and we greeted each other in the only acceptable way below the Mason-Dixon line—with a hug. A real hug. Not a half-pat or a half-tap. But a grab-you-and-let-you-know-somebody’s-got-you kind of hug.
“Claire, I can’t believe how tan you are. It’s only May. When have you had time to lay out?” I asked her.
“Savannah, where have you been? We don’t lay out anymore around here; that stuff will kill you. We use Tan Beautiful that they sell on TV. You just wipe it on, let it sit, and vavoom, you’ve got a tan. Looks natural, doesn’t it?”
“It looks amazing. But I’ll stick to the real thing. What’s the joy of living this close to the ocean if you don’t ever lay out on the beach?”
She laughed.“Wait until we hit thirty. Then you’ll be asking me what the number is to QVC.”
I turned to look at the cute white house in front of us. “This is a charming place.”
“You’re going to love it. It just came on the market yesterday.
I heard some young couple bought it and want to rent out the bottom. Number 13A, that could be you,” she said as she opened the iron gate.
“That would be amazing. You should see where my mother wanted me to move.”
“Already heard and already have.”
“This city is pathetic.”
“This city is Savannah,” she said as she flipped on the light inside. We entered the quaint little apartment in the den area. Directly behind it was an open kitchen and a small area for a breakfast table. Down a small hall toward the back of the house was a bedroom and bath. All in great condition, with what appeared to be the original hardwood floors and moldings. “Isn’t this quaint?”
“Yeah, it really is. What’s the rent?”
“It’s eight hundred a month. It’s a little more than you said you could afford, but this is Savannah.”
“Well, I think I could swing that. At least until I have to get a new car.”
“Oh, that car will outlive you!”
I laughed. “You’re probably right.”We walked through one more time and I checked out the closets, which were small but doable; and then tested the appliances, which were older but in good condition. “This really is great. I think it will be perfect. Do you think I have a couple of weeks, until I get paid?”
“I can find out who the owners are and ask. I don’t even think they are moving in for another month. Heard they wanted to do a few renovations.”
“Well, maybe it would work out perfectly,” I said as we made our way outside and headed to our cars.
As we went to the other side of the street, Grant came walking toward us.“Well, hello, girls. What are you doing over here on this side of town?”
“We could ask you the same question,” Claire chimed in.
“Oh, I’m coming to check on my house. I just bought #13, the white one right up there,” he said, pointing. I simply watched another dream slip its way into the sewer that was quickly becoming my life.
“You’ve got to be kidding—” Claire started.
“Well, you must be doing well at the architectural firm.” I glared at Claire, who retreated. “It looks like a beautiful place.”
“Yeah, times are good, I guess. I thought it was a great place, and Elisabeth loved it. We’re trying to rent out the bottom, though, so if you hear of anyone, let me know.”
“We’ll do that,” I assured him.“Well, we’ve got to run.”
“Yeah, me too. See ya’ll soon, I’m sure.”
“I guess you’ll want me to look for something else,” Claire said in shared hurt as we watched Grant walk into his new house.
“Yeah, that would be a good idea,” I said, opening my door.
“We’ll find something. Keep your chin up.”
“We’ve nowhere left to go but up. Call me.”And I drove away from my second lost opportunity at freedom.
I could hear Vicky before I even entered the kitchen.
“People are just tacky. Who would spend millions on a home and just put tacky right out in plain view? They’ll have to get rid of it. They didn’t get it approved, and they’ll have to get rid of it.” Vicky added the clanging of pots and pans along with her own jaws for effect.
“Victoria, you don’t need to be involved in everyone’s business. When a person spends that much money for a home, they should be able to paint it purple and attach a helicopter pad on the top if they want to.”
“Jake, that’s not how it works.”
“Yes it is,Victoria. Whether you and your little fashion committee think it is fashionable.”
“I don’t have a fashion committee. I have a historical review committee.”
“Call it what you will, but you spend too much time in people’s business.”
My mother was still grumbling like a food processor, preparing what looked to be spaghetti when I came in and sat on the stool by the island.“What’s all the commotion about?” I suspected this little ruckus just might prevent me from having to have any conversation about my day at all.
The pots were clanging louder than had been heard in a good year.“Oh, you wouldn’t believe it, I tell you. People are just crazy.
Just lack the sense God gave a pea turkey.”
“What in the world is a pea turkey?”
“Savannah, don’t bother me about the way I talk. You know good and well a pea turkey isn’t anything more than a pea turkey.”
“OK. So who lacks the sense God gave a pea turkey?”
She turned to stare at me,waving around a small frying pan in her left hand.“This couple down the street invited me over today to see how everything had been decorated since they moved in. They’re from South Carolina. What does that tell you?”
I was sure at that moment my mother had ADD. Decorating and South Carolina had nothing to do with each other. In fact, most of what she said didn’t seem connected. She could change the direction of conversation as quickly as she changed the color of her hair.
Why did it take me so long to notice things? Apparently, I had spent my life too preoccupied, and at that moment I needed to pay more attention to what was going on around me.
“Savannah, are you listening to me?” I was surprised that she noticed I had wandered off the subject as well. Maybe I had ADD too. I didn’t think so. But who could be sure?
“They’re from South Carolina.”
“Oh, right. So you can just imagine where I’m going with this. I go inside, and their house is horrendous. I mean everything is Pepto pink. The walls, the trim, half the furniture.”
“The furniture?”
“Yes, and their poodle even looked like she was pink. It could have been the tones bouncing off of the walls, but by the time I left I thought my aubergine suit had turned pink.”
I dodged the waving pan and added,“Well, aubergine is a variation of the pink-purple family.”
“Savannah, stop. I know what color aubergine is.”
“OK, continue.”
“Now, anyway, beyond the house being horrendous, she told me they had just gotten a satellite. It had come in today. I told her that was great. That she would love it. That we had one as well. Then we proceeded to her patio and gardens.” Her eyes went so wide you would have thought she had seen a two-headed pink pelican.“Well, this, honey, was a satellite big enough to call in Star Trek, Alien Nation, and any other outer space extraterrestrial you would desire. It was big enough for E . T. to phone home, I tell you.”
“Ooh, E . T., huh?”
“Yes, and it had its own concrete slab. It takes up half of their backyard and can be seen from two different streets. All I said was, “Well, honey, I do believe that’s the largest television apparatus I have ever seen.”
“Half the backyard?”
“Savannah, small children could get overtaken by that thing. They could be snatched up by Galaxy Network and lost for eternity. But it won’t stay. I won’t allow it. They are in the Historical District, and that home is on the Register, and I’m not allowing some big canker sore—”
“I think you mean eyesore.”
“Thank you, I mean eyesore like that to exist in this city. Pretty soon people would be calling it artwork and hanging it off the sides of their houses. It wouldn’t end, I tell you. And then we would be known as the satellite capital of the world. I can hear the advertisements: ‘Come to Savannah, where you’ll get beaches, good food, and any channel in the galaxy.’Now that’s just not what I intend to let happen.” And with that, she turned back around to actually use the frying pan she had been torturing me with.
By the time we actually ate, watched a little TV, and went to bed,Vicky was still mumbling under her breath. I washed my face and spent some time in prayer. I crawled into bed not knowing what tomorrow would bring, but certain my future was much brighter than Satellite Lady’s.